Rose made another trip to the lab. The doctor said he was almost one hundred percent certain what she had was pernicious anemia, but he wanted to rule a few other things out, so he had them do more blood work.
As she sat there unable to even look at the blood being drawn, she thought about the doctor’s last words of advice. “And don’t stress. That only makes things worse.”
Great.
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
Vince
It could’ve been a few hours, or maybe even a few days that he’d been lying there, still next to Will’s already cold body. Vince had lost track of time. He hadn’t realized until all the dust had settled that his leg had been cut pretty badly by the flying debris from the bombs. The pain in his leg throbbed, and though he was sure he could walk, even if it was a few steps at a time after crawling back to Will’s side, he’d lost all resolve to do so.
Either they’d come back and find him alive right there next to his good friend, his only friend, or Vince would share Will’s fate and die right there with him. Why should Vince have a second chance if Will hadn’t been given one?
Feeling the bitter tears begin once again, Vince lay down squeezing his eyes shut. Life sucked so badly. Vince felt drained. He was completely spent from all the worrying and torment he’d gone through this past year, wondering if he’d ever get Rose back.
He thought coming to Iraq had been his way of leaving the past behind him for good: finally accepting that things were so fucked up that there was no way of fixing things. Rose was with someone else now. She’d moved on.
“She fucking moved on!” He spit out the words, slamming his fist into the sand and ignoring the pain. How could she have moved on? How was she not still feeling the very thing that tore his insides up? How could he have been so wrong thinking that she felt for him what he felt for her? A love that held no limits—no amount of time, no distance could ever sever it.
Foolishly he’d begun to believe that being this far from her would help him get over her, but he’d been unequivocally wrong in every sense of the word. He lay there, almost wishing he’d be killed rather than go back, knowing she wasn’t his anymore.
As usual his beat-up and dehydrated body gave into exhaustion, and he let it, falling into a deep sleep like he had been doing ever since he crawled back next to Will.
~*~
“You make me happier than I’ve ever been in my life.” Rose’s beautiful eyes stared into his. “Do you know that feeling in your stomach? That craziness you feel like the day you first held my hand?” Vince nodded, knowing exactly what she meant. “Then again when you first kissed me?”
“And every kiss after that,” he whispered staring deep in her beautiful eyes. The feeling, the one she’d just described overwhelmed his insides. Along with it an emotion he’d only ever felt when he was with her—when he kissed her. It was one of the most beautiful and most intense emotions he’d ever experienced in his life.
She squeezed his hand, her eyes suddenly frightened. “Don’t let go, Vincent.”
He shook his head, rapidly feeling her fear inundate him. “I won’t.” But the fear was still there, and he hated it. He hated her being frightened. “I won’t ever. I promise, Rose.”
“Then run.”
“Huh?”
“Run!”
Vince sat up as the sound of the explosion sucked him right out of his dream.
“Run!” a soldier who jumped over him yelled. He turned one last time, his terrified eyes meeting Vince’s for an instant as more soldiers began running past him. “Fucking run!”
In the next instant his entire area was flooded with gunfire. He barely felt the pain in his leg as he scrambled for cover. The second he had a chance, he ran: ran with every ounce of life he had left in him. With the adrenaline pumping through him, but most importantly Rose’s voice still so fresh in his mind, Vince ran for his life. He ran for every single tear he’d shed that year—ran for every tormented breath he’d taken every time he’d been convinced he’d heard her say she loved him for the very last time. He ran for Rose.
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
Rose
Staring at the bracelet once again, Rose obsessed about her never-ending theories as to why for the last time. Rose’s latest theory? She now suspected maybe he’d done this on purpose. Maybe this was his way of getting away from her. Maybe her too-eager response about moving in together had scared him. He hadn’t asked her much about her mother when she mentioned she might be moving back, and that conversation had felt so awkward. Maybe he hadn’t believed her. Maybe he really thought she was apartment shopping even though he hadn’t brought it up once since the first time. So when the idea of him leaving was brought up, maybe that was why he’d accepted so easily.
Taking the bracelet off a little brusquer than she’d originally intended, she blinked away the hot tears that had begun to fill her eyes once again. She was so sick of driving herself crazy with all the maybes. The bottom line was he knowing and willingly did something that could cost them time together. That alone was enough to infuriate her. Why shouldn’t even matter.
She was glad that the day she’d found out he went to Iraq she shredded every single one of his letters without even opening them. She wouldn’t put herself through reading even one more word from him. She had to move on. But how much longer would she be crying for Vincent already? How much longer would she be such a mess?
The doctor said no stress. She had to stop this. The symptoms of her deficiency had already begun to lessen. Though it could be her imagination, the symptoms seemed to act up when she cried. It just drained her to the point she could barely get out of bed even with the injections. And this whole thing had confirmed something she’d always sort of known; she’d never make it in the medical field.
The YouTube videos she’d watched had been absolutely informative, and on paper she now knew exactly how to inject herself or someone else. Unfortunately in the videos it didn’t show you how not to be squeamish. There was no way she was going to inject herself if she didn’t even want to look at the needle breaking through her skin.
Luckily Ben’s being pre-med was coming in handier than she’d ever expected. He’d already given her the first two injections, and he promised to continue as long as he was around. If he hadn’t, she’d be looking at wasting hours at the clinic because there was no way she was injecting herself.
She now blamed her diagnosis for everything including her blubbering episodes, especially during that time of the month when she’d cry at the drop of the dime. Of course she did all this in the privacy of her own room, usually at night when everyone was asleep. You’d think with all the time that had passed, she’d be better about not getting emotional anytime something brought back memories of him.
She even cried when she found out Lorenzo was coming to work at the restaurant for the entire summer. She hated that he’d be around so often now because here she was trying her damnedest to forget Vincent, and Lorenzo reminded her so much of him. Thankfully he’d be working at Sal’s brother’s restaurant on the marina, not the La Jolla Shores restaurant that Sal and Grace owned where Rose worked. It’d be torture to be around him so much. He even laughed just like Vincent: that carefree yet sexy laugh she’d loved and heard so often when they’d been together.
It was bad enough she had to brace herself to see him at all with all the memories he brought back, but now she’d have to see him tonight at this stupid party they were having for her, and he’d see her with Ben. All hope of things ever working out with Vincent were long gone, but she knew tonight would seal it. Physically Ben hadn’t changed much since that day at the park, and she was sure Lorenzo would remember him as the jerk that tried to piss Vincent off. More importantly the fact that she’d be introducing Ben to everyone as her boyfriend would stop any more letters from Vincent.
Even though she hadn’t read his letters since the first few, each new one that arrived had been the tiniest bit of consolation, knowing he was stil
l thinking of her after all this time. It had been over a year now since he’d left, and only now did it feel like the real beginning of the end. Vincent would never forgive her for this.
Before any of this happened Rose wouldn’t even consider being with anyone else. Like she’d always assured him, he owned her body and soul forever. She now saw tonight as symbolic way of moving on because, even if she couldn’t move on, Vincent would for sure once he found out about Ben. It’d be a slap in the face, but Rose couldn’t help that things turned out this way.
Grace was pregnant again and had her hands full with the baby as it was. The last thing Rose wanted was to add to her burden by continuing to be a depressed and now ill hermit. But she was in no way ready to put herself out there yet. This would have to do to convince Grace she was actually doing so.
With a deep breath she walked out of her room and out into the kitchen where she could see through the window that some of the guests had already arrived. Sofia was the first to greet her as she reached the patio door.
“Congrats! Oh my God, I’m so proud of you. That was fast. It took me two full years to get my AA.”
Rose smiled as she took in all the decorations and flowers then frowned. “Yeah, but it’s just my AA. I’m almost afraid to think of what they’ll do when I get my bachelors.”
Sofia laughed. “Oh, don’t worry. Whatever they do, it’ll be huge and there will be tons of food.”
They walked out together to where Sal stood talking to his brother Alex, Sofia’s husband Eric, and Romero. They all turned as the girls walked out and smiled. “It’s the sweetheart of the hour,” Sal said opening his arms out for her.
Rose felt herself blush as she leaned into a big hug from him and then was hugged and congratulated one by one by the other men, each smelling better than the next. She had to agree with Candace. Even though they were all older, well older than the guys she and her friends would ever date, they were a handsome bunch. She only admitted it once to Grace but wouldn’t dare say it out loud since they were all married, and she loved all their wives as well, but since Angel was closest to her in age, she always got a little tongue-tied around him. The thing about this family was that they were all as sweet as they were good looking—even their wives.
She felt guilty now that she’d been so angry and resentful with Sal in the beginning when Vincent first left. He’d done so much for her since she’d come to live with them, and he really didn’t have to. Just because she was Grace’s younger sister, he’d completely taken on the older-brother role, but many times it felt more like a fatherly role with her. His brothers now acted like uncles to her, too. She’d never felt so much sincere warmth from anyone as she had from this entire family.
Rose glanced around the patio quickly taking in all the guests. Her eyes came to a stop on her mom. For the past several months she’d been in limbo staying here with them until Grace found her a suitable apartment. There was plenty of room for her to just stay here, but Rose could tell that Sal didn’t care for her mother, and who could blame him? She hadn’t changed a bit.
When she and her ex-husband Ruben separated almost a year ago, she’d begun hounding Grace about letting her move out here and work for her and Sal at the restaurant. Grace only agreed because her mother said she wanted her own place. She claimed she didn’t want to crash Grace’s marriage that was still in the honeymoon stage for the most part. But ever since she’d moved out here, she’d found one thing after another to object to with every apartment Grace and Rose had found for her.
As usual Sal was the epitome of patience. He’d even gone so far as to suggest they wait until after their second baby was born to look for a place for her mother. The last thing he wanted was for Grace to stress about this while she was pregnant. While Sal had his priorities straight—his pregnant wife’s health came first—her mother as usual thought only of one thing: herself.
Even this brought on thoughts of Vincent. Grace and now Sal and his family showered her with all the love and affection Rose needed, but Vincent’s intense and unconditional love had all but smothered any lingering hurt she felt about her mother’s blatant indifference for her: an indifference that carried into even today. Not once had she mentioned or even asked Rose if she’d be interested in moving in with her if she ever got her own place. Rose knew she shouldn’t care. She was perfectly content living with Grace and Sal. It just seemed that an invitation to have her single daughter live with her and take the burden off her nearly newly wedded daughter, who was just now starting her own family, would be the courteous thing to do: at least for appearance’s sake. Rose certainly wouldn’t take her up on it. It’d just be nice to know that being part of Rose’s life even though she was all grown up now was something that had actually crossed her mother’s mind.
Laughter and a rise in voices coming from the inside brought their attention to the kitchen window. Rose’s heart did a little nervous jump. Ben was there. She hated having to do this, but Grace was right smack in the middle of it all already, smiling big and introducing him to Sal’s parents. Taking a deep breath, she turned to Sal who smiled playfully at her. “Bring him out here. He’s gonna have to meet them all eventually.”
Alex chuckled, sipping his beer as he glanced toward Ben still mingling with his parents. “Yeah, let’s meet this guy already.”
Sofia raised an eyebrow. “You guys better behave. Poor guy.”
“Nah,” Eric laughed. “Let him pay his dues. Lord knows I had to with this family.”
They all laughed, and Rose braced herself as she walked into the kitchen. Ben smiled as soon as he saw her and reached his hand out. She slipped her hand in his and smiled big at Grace. Let the performance commence.
After chitchatting with Grace’s and Sal’s parents a bit more, she led him outside to where the guys stood wearing mischievous grins.
Sal was the first to greet him. “How goes it, Ben?” He reached out and shook his hand.
As one by one she introduced him to all of them, she was relieved that they all did just as Sofia had asked—behaved. That is until Romero started up on him.
“So I heard you’re a player?”
Alex’s eyebrows shot up as did Ben’s and Rose’s.
“What?” Ben asked confused.
“You play college ball,” Romero turned to Sal, “right?”
Both Rose and Ben exhaled at the same time as Romero smirked. “Yeah, I play basketball at UC San Diego.” Ben smiled.
The guys weren’t as bad as Sofia had made it sound like they might be. There was a little teasing and some light-handed warnings about messing with someone in their family. Romero cracked his knuckles a few times, but otherwise it went well.
As Rose and Ben made their way through the guests, making small talk and answering some of the nosier questions from a few of Sal’s aunts, Rose stomach did that little thing it did when she saw Angel and Sarah walk out into the patio. But it was quickly squashed when she saw Lorenzo just behind them. Sarah smiled when her eyes met Rose’s then glanced curiously at Ben.
The moment Lorenzo spotted Ben, Rose knew—he remembered. Immediately she regretted not warning Ben that Lorenzo would be there because Lorenzo glared at him then at her, making no attempt to hide his distaste for what he was looking at.
Thankfully Angel and Sarah walked up to Rose, each hugging and congratulating her. Any pitter-pattering her heart would’ve normally done because of Angel was drowned out by the feeling of dread: dread that Lorenzo might actually say something to Ben.
“Thank you,” she said quickly. Even though Lorenzo had walked in a different direction and at this point showed no interest in meeting Ben, Rose was very aware that he hadn’t taken his eyes off them. She introduced Angel and Sarah to Ben. “You guys, this is my friend Ben.” She turned to Ben. “Ben this is Angel, Sal’s youngest brother and his wife, Sarah.”
A little annoyed at herself that she chickened out of referring to Ben as her boyfriend just because Lorenzo was within hearing dist
ance, she continued the small talk pretending not to notice his heavy presence. He moved about the backyard a few times, but the entire time made it very clear he was watching them.
Everything had been going so smoothly up until he arrived. She’d finally relaxed enough and tried to enjoy herself. Now she couldn’t even think straight. This was ridiculous! And did he have to make it so obvious that he was watching her? He may as well have held up a sign that said, “I’m watching you with this asshole, and I’m disgusted.” It was exactly the message his body language and facial expressions conveyed.
Finally unable to take his scrutiny, she decided to leave his sight at least for a few moments, so she excused herself to use the bathroom.
She was in there for just a few minutes. Looking at her reflection, she practiced her fake smiling a little and tried to shake off the discomfort brought on by Lorenzo being there.
Walking out of the bathroom and turning up the hallway, she was startled by Lorenzo’s voice behind her. “So how long did you actually wait after my brother left to start seeing this dick?” Rose spun around to face him. He was leaning his shoulder against the wall, arms crossed in front of him. “Or were you seeing him before Vince left?”
“No, if you recall, I’m not the one that messed things up between me and Vince,” she reminded him standing her ground.
He dropped his arms and pushed away from the wall: the very wall Vince had once kissed her so passionately against. “How long?”
Fate Page 17
