by Dakota Lee
Feelings blind us to truth, that’s what my heart did. But it’s Logan’s need to be in charge, his lack of empathy and his dark desires that will ultimately be his undoing.
Twenty
Jordanna
“You’re going out again?” Kassidy asks when I step into the living room.
“Invictus House is having a party. You’re not going?”
“Who are you and what have you done to my roommate?”
I laugh at her joke, heading to the mini-fridge to grab some water.
“Seriously Jordanna. What’s going on with you?”
“Nothing. It’s just a party.”
“A party? It’s more than the party. I’m talking about the clothes, the attitude. Jordy this isn’t you.”
“Then who is it, Kass?”
Shaking her head at me, she says, “It’s like you’re turning into one of them.”
She means the BPs. That’s an insult if ever I heard one, but I know her concern is coming from a place of love. “If you can’t beat them…”
“This is your big plan for surviving this semester? Becoming like the people that hurt you?”
“I’m just trying to make the best of a totally fucked up situation. Hiding doesn’t work. Being in their faces and showing them I’m not afraid of them, seems to be the only way I can keep them off my back.”
“Jordy, just because they’re silent doesn’t mean you’re safe. This could go so badly.”
She has a point. This is insane and it could all blow up in my face. But this is the only way to get close enough to destroy them. Kassidy’s been there for me and I hate that I can’t tell her what I’m really up to. But when the truth comes out, I don’t want her life imploding too. “Kass. I know what I’m doing.” Slipping my phone and keycard into my back pocket, I say, “If you change your mind, the parties at…”
“I know where it is,” she grumbles.
“Kass, you’re a better friend than I deserve, don’t be mad.”
“I’m not mad. I’m concerned. But, as mom would say, you have to embrace things to find your truth, and if you’re comfortable with your decisions, I am too. Just be careful.”
I pop a loud kiss on her cheek. “I will.”
* * *
Kassidy’s concern is touching but she doesn’t have to worry about me running into any of the BP’s because they won’t be at the party. The person who screen-shotted the videos of me and Logan, and passed them on to Bella however, will be. It was an exercise in patience, but things finally fell into place and tonight I set things in motion to get payback on the guy who helped Logan and Bella violate my privacy.
I’ve seen his school file. Montanna’s already got two strikes against him for unauthorized access to people’s computers, and it looks like he’s the mastermind behind Patrick’s backdoor access to the teachers grade books and lesson plans. Time to make it data breach number three.
I slip unnoticed into the party, immediately going to the kitchen to get a drink. I down two shots for courage and take the third with me to the bathroom. The people at this school are assholes and cowards, and they’ll never go against the BP’s without a little nudge.
Drunk party girl is the only way they’ll drop their guard enough to do something stupid. I flick some tequila on my top like its perfume and muss my hair to make it look like I’ve been here a while. I’m wearing the highest pair of heels I own, so stumbling around on them while pushing through the crowd won’t be hard to do. Gripping the hem of my skirt, I inch it up just a tad higher, then toss the rest of the tequila down the drain.
What I’m about to do goes way beyond anything I’ve done at a VDU party before. After one last calming breath, I step back into the action, exaggerating my walk, swinging my hips from side to side. Everyone here has a cellphone with a camera. I just need a few of them to capture my antics on film and do what they do best. Gossip about it on Prospectus.
Since this is a grad school party, the assumption is no one will be dumb enough to post what happens tonight on Prospectus and risk pissing off Noel and Sterling. My gut says one or all of the BP’s won’t be able to resist wanting to see what goes on here, and will instruct Montanna and his little fingers to retrieve the footage from someone’s computer.
I made the Evite for tonight’s party and the frat president sent it out on Prospectus. I owe Marina big time, for going out with the IT guy who wrote the code embedded in the picture. Glancing down at my feet, I smile. She’s a shoe fanatic and will receive an identical pair of heels on Monday.
Weaving in and out of the crowd, I catch the eye of someone who thinks he’s the exact type of fun I need. I don’t have to fake being entertained, because he’s hot and funny. Though the flipping in my belly that would make this next part easier is missing. Should’ve taken that last shot and two more to loosen me up.
When he pulls me closer, I cross my wrists behind his neck, smiling up at him through hooded eyes. I turn away just as he leans in. Thankfully, the music changes to something up tempo. I raise my hands above my head, giggling as I rush towards the dining room table.
Marina, Tiff and I have danced to this song tons of times at our favorite pub. I can stomp on a bar with the best of them, and today I’m taking our act a little further. I slip off my shoes, and whip my shirt over my head, revealing the half corset underneath. I’m flipping my hair around as I shimmy my hands up my body. Four other girls join me. Two on my right, the other two on my left. They scream their encouragement, ditching their shirts too, and we dance, writhing and grinding next to each other.
The camera phones are out, recording and snapping pictures. The gravelly voice at the front of the crowd reminds everyone, “What happens in Invictus stays in Invictus. I better not see any of this shit on Prospectus.” Looking down at Sterling, I wink and blow him a kiss before turning around and giving a show to the people on the other side of the table.
The chatter stalls momentarily when I enter the classroom. I’m sure the they’re all talking abut my performance this weekend so I make certain to meet the eyes of a few of the students I saw at the party and give them a smile that conveys. No biggie. It was fun, and I’m safe from embarrassment, because no one outside of the party that night will ever see the video.
It’s a crock of shit. Montanna hacked no less than six accounts to grab different angles of the footage. Now I have enough information to get him declared a cyber menace. One word of this and he’ll be sporting the latest tech gadget in the form of electronic handcuffs. A little love note from an anonymous sender should arrive in his mailbox any moment now encouraging him to decline any more jobs from his voyeuristic masters. That’s when the pieces will start shifting across the board. I know Monty is a pawn. He’s already uploaded the file to an encrypted server. Now I’m biding my time to see which player offered him up as a sacrifice.
Logan and Bella enter the room together. This time the conversation halts completely. I ignore the stifling quiet, swiping casually through my phone. Dixon nudges me, tipping his chin towards the other side of the room, seconds before Kassidy jabs me in the back with her pen.
“Jordanna, what did you do?” She asks under her breath.
I look up and see Logan staring at me. “Nothing.”
It’s an honest answer, because everyone else did the dirty work for me. One thing I’ve learned about the students at VDU, they love a good scandal and if there’s not one happening, they’ll conjure it up out of thin air. All it takes is a premise and their fingers to get momentum going.
My dancing on the table with four other women was innocent. As was Sterling, making sure I got back to my dorm safely. It’s the shirt coming off and being flung into the crowd and my wink at him that’s fueling this rumor train. Now I’m glad Kassidy didn’t go to the party with me, because she won’t be able to give Logan any answers.
He crosses the length of his aisle, stopping next to my seat. I ignore him, resting my chin in my hand, my elbow on the desk, waiting for t
he professor to begin.
“Get your shit.”
I look next to and behind me, as if trying to figure out who he’s talking to.
“Now Jordanna.”
“You remember what happened the last time someone tried to make me give up my seat?” I ask, still not looking at him. “Of course you do, and so do I. Let’s not start down that path again.”
“Get your shit.” He repeats. “We’re leaving.”
“It’s too late to ditch. Wynn is taking attendance. You’d better grab your seat. The lecture will be starting any second now.”
We’re drawing attention and I can’t bring myself to care. I know exactly why Logan wants me out of this class. Because I was at a party he wasn’t at, doing shit a girl he’s supposed to be controlling, shouldn’t be doing, and the other guests there were interacting with me. We were having fun. It’s a great big fuck you to his mandate and ego. Now he’s trying to flex his muscles. Well, fuck that, I’m flexing mine right back. His power over me by way of orgasms is over. It’s time he started realizing that.
His jaw ticks as he continues to stare at me. “Get up before I drag you out.”
“I really can’t miss any classes, my job in the dean’s office and at the paper would be in jeopardy.” Now, I turn my eyes to him, silently pleading with him to take his seat and stop causing a scene. I’m impressed with my acting chops.
His hands unclench, and he nods once turning towards his seat, throwing over his shoulder, “I’ll see you at the studio, tonight.”
“Maybe.”
As soon as he sits, Bella’s bending over in his ear but his focus is still on me. Frustration simmers behind the green in his eyes. I look past him to Amber. Her time with his hands between her legs came and went awfully fast. Sorry, Amber, but I can’t very well let him think he has options. She’s staring at him, hunger in her eyes. Everyone can see he’s on edge, and I’m going to be the one to push him over it.
“You’re playing a dangerous game.” Kassidy warns when class is finally over.
“I’m not playing at anything. Logan lost his right to make demands of my time and energy when he shared photos of me with everyone. I can’t get in trouble or Dean Allen will dis-enroll me. He won’t care that we’re not even midway through the semester. I need to be here.”
“I know. It’s just all so intense and broody and full of intrigue. I mean, is Logan repentant or renewing his vendetta?”
I shrug because those are the same questions I have and I don’t have answers either. He’s a few feet in front of us, heading across the quad, to link up with Hal and Frankie. I’m in control of my part of this thing, but I can’t predict the moves he’s going to make, or who he’ll use next to help with his plans. It’s time to get to work on trapping another one of his knights.
The light next to the couch flicks on when I push the front door closed. One hand flies to my mouth, the other to the left side of my chest, holding in my heart that damn near leaped out of it. When I’m no longer on the edge of dying, I stalk past Logan, heading to my bedroom. “I guess this means you and Kassidy have made up.”
“Relax, I don’t have her key. She let me wait here because I told her I was worried sick about you when you didn’t show up at the studio. She hadn’t heard from you either.”
“The studio? Why would I?”
“You said you’d come by tonight.”
My brows furrow, trying to recall the conversation. “I said maybe.”
“I was waiting for you Jordanna.”
“I never asked you to do that. I said maybe, and I didn’t make it. What’s the big deal?”
“The big deal is you weren’t anywhere on campus, your roommate hadn’t seen or heard from you in hours, and I was worried.”
“God, relax, dad. I’m fine. This might be a little hard for you to comprehend, but I have a life, and I don’t consult or include Kassidy in everything I do.”
“Don’t I know it.”
With my back towards him, I smile, thinking of the party footage. I school my face into a mask of indifference and turn back to face him, placing my hand on the door. “As you can see, I’m alive and well. You can leave now.” I close the door in his face, and flick the lock.
Pulling my journal from under my pillow, I cross another item off my list. My plan is in motion for Montanna, Frankie, and Hal. My eyes skim over the next name. Princessa Bianchi. With her families history, her name generates enough gossip and scandal on its own. Tabitha seemed the most genuine out of the group, and I really thought we were friends. I couldn’t have been more wrong. She was in on it, so she deserves what’s coming to her just like everyone else.
On the outside it looks like Tabitha is the weakest link, blindly following Bella without question, but I’ve noticed the looks she gives her queen when she thinks no ones paying attention. And Logan treats her differently, as if he trusts her. Likes her. And that means I have to tread carefully with my approach.
I’ve done my research, and I know Tabitha has a two-hour break on Tuesdays and Thursdays. She either spends it in the computer lab, or off at one of the frat houses secretly playing video games. I wouldn’t have the first clue what to do with one, but Summer does and keeps trying to get me hooked, so this is the opening I’m using to get close to Tabby.
My good buddy Dixon keeps inviting me to watch them play Call of Duty. Today, I’ve finally said yes.
“Jordanna, you made it.” Dixon says rushing over to greet me at the door.
I take in the room, which looks a lot different from when it’s swarming with writhing, drunk bodies on party nights.
“Am I too late?”
“No, you’re just in time. We’ve finished our warmups and now we’re about to get into the real tournament.”
“And this is all night?” I ask, scrunching my nose. “Not trying to show my ignorance but, seriously, the twenty-four-hour comment was a joke, right?”
“Not a joke. Once everyone gets here, we’re tucked in for twenty-four hours, so I hope you don’t have any plans tomorrow.”
“So this is like a lockdown?”
“Without the expectation of nudity, unless you want to.” Someone says from the other side of the room.
“Well, uh…”
“She doesn’t want to.” Tabitha announces from her corner of the couch. She gets to her feet, coming to stand beside Dixon. “In fact, she took a wrong turn at the quad, got lost, and was just leaving.”
Frowning at the tone in her voice, I shake my head. Walking over to the spot where the guy is sitting, I say, “I’m not leaving. Someone is supposed to teach me how to play these games, so I don’t lose horribly when I go up against my sister.” I wiggle my fingers. “I can paint and draw with the finest of brush strokes, but it’s like I have gorilla paws when it comes to video game controllers.”
Dixon sits down, patting the seat beside him. When I sit, he slings his arm over my shoulder, giving me a comforting squeeze. “You’ve come to the right place. I promise this’ll be fun.”
“You gonna give me a pre-test or something?”
“Nope. The best way to learn is by doing.” He passes me a controller and someone else slides into the last empty space on the couch. “You’re in for the time of your life.”
Looking left and right, I see that I’m surrounded by hotties, and I feel nothing. Not even a smidge of desire. Shit, as soon as this is over, I need to figure out a way to break whatever weird hold Logan has over my libido. I’m sure it must have something to do with a mental block and him being my first. If I can push through my hate and screw him, surely I can go all the way with someone I like.
I try to keep up as they explain what each button does and how to pick up a weapon, shoot, duck and dodge. It’s weird and makes no sense, but after a while I start to get the hang of it.
“You don’t have to move the controller right or left. Just push the buttons.” Dixon laughs when I move my arms and hands as if steering a car.
I di
e in a blaze of glory and lower the controller. “Why do I feel like I’m sweating? This is like an upper body workout.”
“You’ll get used to it and learn to relax into your grip.” He says, restarting the game so I can try again.
* * *
If I thought tonight would be tame. I was wrong. The pizza and wings arrive, the drinks start flowing, and I realize that not everyone here came for the video games. A good chunk are, but this is still VDU, and any day is a good day for a party.
Someone’s even taken up the role as DJ. When a cup is shoved in my face, I look up to see the guy from earlier standing over me. It’s hard to see what’s in the cup without taking it.
Tabitha’s a few feet away, swaying back and forth to the music. Her eyes pop open when I ask, “Is this safe to drink?”
“Absolutely.” The guy says.
Sure, like I believe him. Dixon walks back over, takes the cup from his friend and hands me the unopened beer in his hand. “That shit’s like liquid gasoline. Trust me when I say you don’t want that.”
I tip my lips up, shaking my head at the guy. “Safe, huh?”
He laughs a deep warm sound and gives me a heart-stopping smile that I’m sure makes panties erupt. But still, nothing.
“Come on, try it. You won’t be disappointed with the buzz it gives you.”
Tabitha’s still watching us. “What do you think?” I ask her. “Will my liver explode if I drink this?”
She moves closer, taking the cup from Dixon and pouring some into her cup and passing the other half to me. “Only one way to find out.” She knocks her cup against mine and says, “Bottoms ups.”
We chug and holy hell; it is like something that could start a fire. Tabitha laughs as I sputter, trying to catch my breath. “Why aren’t you shooting flames out of your chest?”
Shrugging, she says, “Because I drink this shit all the time.” She slips her arm around me, and pulls me to the floor. “Let’s get you some water, lightweight.”
