by Ariel Bonin
"Brian chose me to take his place as leader of New Canaan."
Lindsey simply stared at him, her mouth agape. Then her eyes darted around the room as she processed the news. She rubbed at her arms and stood a little straighter. "Andrew…I-I don't know what to say. I'm not sure how I feel about this."
"That makes two of us," he said with a sigh, rotating back to his dinner.
Suddenly, he felt her soft hands on his back and her cheek at his shoulder blade. "I don't want to leave you with the impression that I don't think you can do it. I know you can. It's just…"
"I know," Andrew said over his shoulder, "but no matter what, nothing comes before my family. I'll do what the people want, but at the end of the day, I'll do what's right for us."
If only it were that easy, said the annoying voice at the back of his head.
Lindsey gently rubbed the tense muscles beneath her hands and then reached up to grasp the back of his neck. He turned his head as she stretched on tip toes to kiss his rough cheek.
"You have my full support. Whatever you do, Mr. Flynn, I'll back you up."
Andrew smiled and drawled quietly, "Thanks, Mrs. Flynn."
_____
The following Monday was to be the announcement by General Kirkman, but not until the afternoon. At the beginning of the day, Lindsey knew her nerves had her riled up, but her stomach was unusually upset. It was a familiar feeling from her past, the one she had dreaded since she'd found out she was pregnant. Every smell turned her gut and only a few foods appealed to her. She discovered a box of stale crackers in the kitchen and breathed a sigh of relief. She ate three and then stuffed the rest into her school bag.
On the way to drop off Jake at daycare, she ran into Charlie.
"What are you doing here?" she asked, glancing around, as if looking for an answer.
The man frowned. "Ain't it Survivor Day, or whatever the hell you were callin' it?"
Shit. "Yeah! Yes, it is! I am so sorry. It completely slipped my mind. You still up for a demonstration?"
Charlie scoffed. "Why else would I be here?
"You're right," Lindsey replied, and took a deep breath. "I'm sorry."
He must have picked up on her distress, because he reached for Jacob. "Let me take him. I already put my stuff in your room. Go on n' get settled."
"Thank you," Lindsey whispered with a grateful smile, and then nodded at Zoey as she trailed Charlie down the hall.
Halfway to her classroom, she smelled it. Her stomach clenched violently and she gagged. Stopping to put the back of her hand to her mouth, she closed her eyes and pushed down the nausea. When she stepped foot in her room, she walked toward the bucket on her desk as if it contained a bomb. Looking down with a contorted expression, she cursed her morning sickness for arriving on the day of Charlie's fish gutting demonstration. Yes, there was more to it than that, but all she cared about was how the hell she would get through it without tossing her three crackers. The smell was even more intense up close and she couldn't help but release a sickly moan.
Her Advanced students arrived at that moment, followed by Charlie. To the best of her ability, she sucked it up and pasted a smile on her face—she only hoped it didn't look like a grimace.
"Okay, everyone, today is Survival Day," Lindsey began. "We are lucky enough to be graced by the presence of our resident badass Charlie Knox. Say hello."
She prompted her students with the wave of her hand. The guys said a cool "hey" while the girls gave him shy smiles. Charlie merely grunted with a nod, completely ignoring the ogling from the young ladies.
"So, Charlie, what do you have for us today?" she asked, unfortunately already knowing the answer.
"I'm gonna teach y'all the basics of fishin'—what kinda fish you can expect to find out here, how to bait a hook, and how to gut it."
The girls lost their pleasant expressions and replaced them with a look of disgust. The boys appeared indifferent, as they'd probably already done this before. Although she'd done much worse, just for today, Lindsey was siding with the girls.
She tapped her foot as Charlie progressed through his lecture—not out of boredom, but for fear of what was coming. When he finally presented each student with a cutting board, knife and dead fish, Lindsey felt light-headed from holding her breath for such a long period of time.
"First, ya cut it down the middle from bottom to top," he instructed, doing so with his large hunting knife. "Then, ya scoop out the guts." He did this next step with his bare hands, stretching out the slimy innards until they detached, and plopped them onto the desk.
Lindsey had pretty much seen this happen to humans, but almost always kept her wits about her. Not this time. Her face turned hot and her breathing quickened as she started to hyperventilate. Bile rose up from deep within her belly and she barely made it to the empty bucket. Her abdomen clenched painfully as she threw up what little food was in her stomach. Tears tracked down her cheeks from the agony and embarrassment. Covering her mouth before she could convulse again, she hurried out of the room.
_____
Everyone watched it happen with a shocked expression, Charlie included. As Lindsey's echoing footsteps disappeared down the hallway, he overhead one of the girls whisper to the other, followed by giggles.
"The fuck ya laughin' at?" he asked, not caring about being appropriate if they couldn't be.
"She's totally pregnant," one of the girls said, rolling her eyes at his obliviousness.
Zach cracked up from the other end of the row. "Dude," he said to Zoey, "your dad knocked up Miss Lindsey!"
Zoey's face blanched. She avoided eye contact as she forcefully pushed away from the desk and threw her bag over her shoulder.
"Hey, Zoey," Charlie called out, watching the girl disappear in the opposite direction as Lindsey. Behind him, Zach snorted and continued to laugh. Nostrils flaring, Charlie whirled around and slammed his knife down into the teenager's desk, impaling it in the wooden surface. Zach jumped back in his chair and stared at Charlie with wide eyes as the man said, "If ya don't shut yer goddamn mouth, I'll show ya that I can gut more than just a fish!"
"Y-yes sir," Zach stammered, gulping loudly.
Sighing out a growl, Charlie wrenched his knife free and stuffed it into his belt. He didn't care what the students did at that point as he jogged out of the room to find Lindsey.
_____
After washing up at the bathroom sink, Lindsey sat down against the wall and continued to cry. She was truly mortified by what had just occurred. She hoped the students would assume she had a weak stomach and that was all.
A knock on the door startled her from her thoughts and she heard Charlie's low voice. "Linds, ya in there?"
"Come in," she managed. Her throat ached and burned, which in turn, made her voice sound rough.
The door cracked open and Charlie slipped inside. He shut it behind him and leaned against the wall across from her. She tipped her head back and looked up at him with tired eyes.
"I'm sorry," she croaked, "I'm not feeling too great today…it just caught me off guard."
"You're pregnant," he said pointedly, knocking the breath from her chest with his perceptive gaze. She opened her mouth to deny it, but he quipped, "Don't even try. I can tell when you're lyin'."
Lindsey tried to laugh but didn't have the energy. "I am," she answered weakly. "And if you know, then Zoey…?"
She looked at him, her weary gaze expectant. When his sharp eyes softened and his mouth tensed, she knew she had her answer.
"Oh, God," she exhaled, and covered her face on a choked sob. "Shit, shit…" she muttered as Charlie knelt down before her. He pulled her toward him and allowed her forehead to rest on his shoulder. He patted her hair with a calloused hand and waited until she was done.
Finally, when she lifted her head, he asked, "Does Andy know?" She nodded. "I could tell. He's been too damn happy lately."
Lindsey smiled, but just as quickly her expression fell. "I need to find him. He needs to k
now about Zoey."
"Then let's go," Charlie answered, pulling her onto shaky feet. He steadied her as she dragged messy tendrils of hair behind each ear. "Okay?"
Taking a shuddering breath, she said, "I'm good."
Before she could leave the bathroom though, he wrapped his arms around her in a brief, uplifting embrace. It was his way of saying congratulations, and it made her heart soar.
Chapter 14
Lindsey was halfway out the building's front door when she remembered her students. "I can't leave them in the middle of class," she began.
"They can take care of themselves," Charlie grumbled with a scowl.
The woman sighed. "Well, yeah, but I'm their teacher. I have a job to do."
After staring at her for a moment, he finally nodded. "Fine. I'll find Andrew and give him a heads up."
"Thank you," she said, placing a hand on her chest.
Turning back, she made her way down the corridor and took a deep breath before entering her classroom. To her surprise, the four students still remained in their seats. She held their rapt attention as she stopped to stand before them. Her head swiveled to the desk and found that the bucket was gone.
"Where…?" she asked, holding out a cautious hand.
"We took it outside," one of the girls answered.
With a wince and ruddy cheeks, Lindsey said, "Thanks… I'm sorry."
The girl shrugged. "You were kinda busy. Besides, we should be the ones who are sorry. That fish gutting was pretty disgusting. We shouldn't have laughed at you, so…sorry."
"Yeah, sorry, Miss Lindsey," the others echoed, although she knew Tommy had nothing to do with it—he was a nice kid.
"Thanks, guys. Guess I didn't bring my iron stomach today. I'm fine now though," she said, opting to keep them in the dark about her pregnancy a little longer. So what if Andrew, Zoey and Charlie knew—they'd keep her secret.
_____
Meanwhile, Andrew met with Dr. Anderson at the clinic to discuss future plans, like what supplies were needed to keep the place running. Partway through their conversation, the door swung open and Zoey appeared, with Hannah looking exasperated behind her.
"I told her you were in a meeting, but she wouldn't listen," Hannah explained, her youthful eyes panicked.
"It's all right," Dr. Anderson said with a forgiving hand outstretched. Hannah walked away, shaking her head.
"Zoey, what's going on?" Andrew asked, assessing his daughter's enraged expression.
"I need to talk to you right now."
"Hey, calm down," he said. Glancing at Dr. Anderson, Andrew pushed up from his chair and asked, "Could you excuse us for a minute?"
"Actually, I should check on a patient, so feel free to use my office." The doctor left her seat, circled around the metal desk, nodded politely at Zoey and closed the door behind her.
"What the hell was that about?" Andrew hissed, his blue eyes ablaze.
"You and Lindsey are having a baby." Zoey's tone was accusing.
The bottom fell out from Andrew's stomach as he stared at her, dumbfounded.
"So it's true, then? Or has she even told you? No one's told me yet!" Zoey shouted.
Andrew shushed her. This wasn't how he wanted Zoey to find out, but it was too late. "Yeah, she's pregnant. Yes, she's told me. And no, I was waiting for the right moment to tell you."
"Well, it looks like you've fucked up again, Dad—"
"Hey! Watch it!" he snapped as his temper boiled over. "How can you say that? Is that what you think of your brother? As a fuck up?"
"No! He's the innocent one! You're the one that keeps screwing up! Mom died having Jacob… How do you think Lindsey is going to end up?"
Andrew could handle accusations across the board, especially when they'd come from people like Dean Mason, but not his daughter. The girl's words cut him deep and he felt his anger give way to shame. When he spoke, his voice was quiet, strained.
"I was thinkin' that this place will be better for raising a child, more so than that damn school. We have a real doctor here and a clinic with adequate medical supplies." He stopped to search Zoey's calculating gaze. "I love what we have… I wanted to expand on it."
"Well that was a good thought, Dad, but if this place falls apart, I won't be the one to hold her when she bleeds to death," Zoey said, the words hitching in her throat as her eyes became glassy.
"Zoey…" Andrew whispered painfully, cocking his head to the side. "I'm so sorry you had to do that. I regret it every damn day. I promise you, it won't happen—"
"Stop. Don't make promises you can't keep," Zoey said, shaking her head in a wounded manner.
Andrew opened his mouth to speak, but a knock silenced him. The door pushed open and Charlie walked in.
"Here to check up on me?" Zoey retorted with a slight eye roll.
"Drop the attitude," Andrew said, narrowing his gaze, and then looked to Charlie. "What are you doin' here? Aren't you fishing today?"
"Nah, was helpin' Lindsey with somethin' at school, but she got sick in the middle of it."
"Is that…?" Andrew began to say to Zoey as he slowly put the pieces together. "That's how you found out?"
In that moment, he thought of Lindsey. She was probably mortified, and now worried.
"Is she okay?" he asked Charlie.
The man nodded. "She went back to class."
"And that's where you should be," Andrew said to the teenager.
"What about you?" Zoey asked, turning the tables. "You haven't been working on the boat for, like, a week. What are you doing here?"
Andrew glanced at the floor as his jaw went rigid. The day was becoming not at all what he'd hoped it would be. Not only did Zoey find out about Lindsey's pregnancy, Andrew was going to have to share his latest news. It didn't help that Charlie was waiting for an answer, too.
"You know how Kirkman wants everyone at the pavilion this afternoon?"
"Yeah…" Zoey's voice held a hint of wariness.
"He and Brian selected me to lead…he's going to announce it then."
Charlie remained quiet, but Andrew could see his eyes moving in the usual way they did when he was thinking about a new piece of information. Zoey made a disgusted noise and threw up her hands.
"That's awesome. Congratulations, Dad," she said with thick sarcasm. "It sounds like you have a lot going for you. Just don't forget about your family when things get shitty. Ya know, the family you had before all of this?"
Andrew would overlook the language at this point, but he'd had it up to here with his daughter's teenage defiance. "I didn't ask to lead. I've never wanted it!"
"You didn't have to ask because you just expected it, Captain," she said, giving him an abrupt salute.
"Zoey…" Andrew said, his tone a warning.
"No, do whatever you want. Enjoy your new wife, your new baby, your new job. I'll see you when I see you," Zoey jabbed, then spun around and stalked out of the room.
Andrew exhaled an angry breath and scrubbed his hands over his face. His tired eyes landed on Charlie, who was biting the corner of his lip thoughtfully.
"Do you think I'm making a mistake?"
"With the baby? No. Being the leader again?" He shrugged. "Maybe. Too soon to tell, though."
"By then, it will be too late," Andrew whispered.
_____
At two o'clock, with wife and son by his side, Andrew was announced as the chosen leader of New Canaan. Shocked silence gripped the crowd. He was aware that he was holding his breath as he took in the stunned expressions. Eventually, a woman stepped up to the front. Middle-aged, with small, dark eyes, a wide nose and tan complexion, he knew he'd seen her before, but they had never spoken.
"You can't be serious?" she directed at Kirkman.
The general was unmoved. "I am."
She looked at Andrew now. "You seem like a nice guy and you have a lovely family, but you just got here. What makes you any more qualified than, say, someone who's been here since the beginning?"
Kirkman intercepted before Andrew could respond.
"He's more qualified than you think. As a former captain in the U.S. Army, he was also the leader of his own group. I know there are others who could do the job well, but Brian chose him."
"And it's awfully convenient that our leader, who had been on countless runs previously, died in some freak accident. Wendy, too. No other witnesses than his own man, right?" she said, referring to Charlie.
Andrew clenched his jaw to the point where it bordered on painful as he listened to the hateful accusation. Lindsey rubbed his arm in a casual manner, and then slid it around to his back. He glanced at her, his gaze softening the slightest bit. What would he do without her unwavering support?
Kirkman cleared his throat and said, "I checked those bodies myself and confirmed the cause of death in each case. Brian died from a devastating gunshot wound to the abdomen, the round matching those in Wendy's assault rifle. There was no way Andrew or Charlie could have saved him. I, too, am upset by his passing, but these allegations are not acceptable. What you seem to be forgetting is the fact that Brian made this decision. I'm just carrying it out. You should respect his decisions in death, as you did during his life."
Andrew had to refrain from raising his eyebrows at David's compelling response. What was that stupid phrase his best friend had used all the time in high school? Oh yeah, "touché." He thought that applied here.
The woman relaxed her guarded stance. "I'm sorry," she said, her words directed at both men.
"May I?" Andrew asked David, signaling to the crowd. The man nodded.
Andrew stood before the people of New Canaan and looked each of them in the eye. "I know I'm new here. I know respect and trust needs to be earned. I will do everything within my power to keep us on track and maintain the vision that Brian had for this place. What we have here is special. The memory of what's out there is still fresh in my mind." He took a moment to glance at Lindsey, recognizing the silvery scar on her brow. He randomly remembered lyrics from their Bad Company song, and said, "We've paid our dues, over and over. I won't take this new responsibility lightly, as I know what's at stake. All I ask is that you give me a chance to prove myself."
