Tawas Goes Hollywood
An Agnes Barton Senior Sleuths Mystery
Madison Johns
Copyright © 2017 Madison Johns
Tawas Goes Hollywood Madison Johns
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Disclaimer
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, events and incidents are either the products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.
No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical reviews and certain other noncommercial uses permitted by copyright law.
Table of Contents
Title Page
Copyright Page
Copyright Page
Tawas Goes Hollywood (Agnes Barton Senior Sleuths Mystery, #14)
When a video of Agnes and Eleanor solving a mystery is leaked online, director Roman Douglas hopes to profit from their success and make a movie about them showcasing Tawas as the next Cabot Cove.
Production trucks are soon rolling into town and setting up at Tawas Point for the opening scene, but before the director has a chance to call out “action” a man is found dead on the set.
Actresses Hannah Paris and Eileen Foster didn’t come to Tawas to be embroiled in a real mystery and they’re certainly not welcome to butt in as Agnes Barton and Eleanor Mason embark on their greatest adventure to date — proving to these Hollywood bigshots that they deserve to act in their own movie!
But will Agnes and Eleanor be able to solve this mystery before the cast and crew is killed off one by one?
Chapter One
Eleanor and I smiled as we took our seats on the tram that would take us on the Universal Studios tour in Hollywood. Andrew and Mr. Wilson sat across the aisle from us for the fourteen-block tour.
“Oh this is so exciting,” Eleanor gushed.
My heart thumped against my chest and I pressed a hand to my brow as I felt quite dizzy. “Oh great. Another moving vehicle.”
“Don’t be such a Gloomy Gus. Just think, we’ll see where all the big-time Hollywood movies were made.”
I forced a smile. “You’re right, Eleanor. I didn’t mean to make this about me. I can’t believe I’m the only one worried about meeting with Roman Douglas later.”
“There’s no need to worry about that quite yet,” Andrew said.
“I’m excited about the possibility of Roman making a real movie about Eleanor and me. But who should play me ... I mean you. Who should play you, Eleanor?”
Eleanor grinned. “Betty White, of course.”
I nearly spit out my dentures. “That’s funny. I thought she could play me.”
“Do you suppose Jessica Fletcher might want to play you?”
“Out of the question. I believe Jessica has done her years as a fictional sleuth.”
“Except we’re not fictional. We’re the real deal.” Eleanor winked.
“How about Jane Fonda?” Andrew asked from across the aisle.
“Susan Sarandon?” Eleanor added. “But she’s a little too young to be you, Agnes.”
“Not by much,” I countered.
“What are you talking about?” an old woman ahead of us asked.
“Oh, nothing. We’re just considering who would play me in a movie about my life,” I said.
Eleanor shook her head. “She means there might be an actual movie about us —.”
“Don’t listen to my friend. We’re not that interesting.”
“Speak for yourself,” Mr. Wilson shouted.
“We’re here for the tour and that’s all,” I said as I folded my arms across my chest and shot Eleanor one of my “stop blabbing” looks.
“Fine. I was only kidding,” Eleanor said. “Look, it’s time for the tour to start.”
“Are you okay, Agnes? You’re looking rather green,” Andrew observed, trying to reroute the conversation.
“I don’t know what’s gotten into me. The bus ride over here was nearly my undoing. I’m just hoping my stomach will settle down before the big meeting.” I didn’t want to admit that I was having a bout with motion sickness.
“The driver hopped aboard and a young woman claimed the microphone that was attached to a pole and tapped it expectantly. She cleared her throat and smiled. “I’m Cindy and I’ll be your tour guide today.”
I made an attempt to not roll my eyes. I would have appreciated a different line from a tour guide here in Hollywood. Something along the lines of, “Whew, I almost didn’t make it today. I was kidnapped last week and I managed to land a plane to arrive today after I subdued my captors. Oh and by the way, my name is Cindy.”
“What are you grumbling about over there, Agnes?” Eleanor whispered.
“Sorry, I didn’t know I mumbled out loud again.”
“Well, cut it out already. I don’t want to miss anything.”
The tram moved along as Cindy pointed out Stage 22 and Stage 43, where sitcoms were being shot. “As you’ll notice if you look off to the left, there are trailers where actors relax when they’re between scenes.”
“Oh, so when they say they’re going back to their trailer that’s where they go?” Eleanor asked with a tilt of her head.
I smiled at Eleanor’s tone. It was apparent that I wasn’t the only one who really needed to be told everything. I was more interested in old Hollywood.
Golf carts whizzed past and workers wearing hard hats worked in areas where buildings were under construction. Eleanor craned her neck. “What are you doing?” I asked. “You’re going to wake up with a wrenched neck.”
“I thought I saw a star,” she sighed, “but it’s only Mr. Potato Head.”
“That’s because Hasbro has an office in a bungalow over there,” Cindy explained. “The bungalows were primarily used as the stars’ dressing rooms at one time. And you’ll notice one has the sign of Hannibal, and interestingly, it once belonged to Alfred Hitchcock.”
“Oh wow,” I said. It’s about time things got more interesting. I didn’t know what was wrong with me today, but I didn’t want to be a bummer. It was just that I have a feeling that something isn’t right, a premonition perhaps.
“How about that, Agnes?” Andrew asked with a smile. “I knew this would be a fun tour.”
“Can’t we stop and take a look around?” Agnes asked.
“It’s not allowed, which is why you all need to remain seated for your safety,” Cindy said.
“Aww,” Eleanor pouted.
I frowned. “That goes double for me.”
“We’re headed to the back lot now,” Cindy called out. “As you can see, the buildings look fake and they are. They’re only fronts and sides with nothing past the front doors. But movies are shot here.”
“Ah the wonders of movie magic,” Andrew said. “They certainly don’t look fake in films.”
“I’d venture movies could always use a little magic,” Mr. Wilson said.
“They remind me of those fake fronts at old west towns to make people think the town was bigger than it was.”
“It’s a clever illusion,” I agreed.
“Has anyone ever gotten lost in the back lot?” Eleanor asked.
“There wouldn’t be a reason for anyone to lurk around here. Believe me when I say it’s carefully supervised,” Cindy cautioned.
“Which means
stay in the tram,” Andrew warned with a raised brow.
“That sounds like a challenge,” Eleanor whispered to me. Her eyes then widened and she pointed out the window, “Hey is that a body?”
The tram came to a stop and Eleanor and I were off the vehicle in a flash despite the startled tour guide ordering us to stop.
We stooped to take a closer look at the man’s body. “He’s been shot, I think,” Eleanor pointed out.
“Or stabbed,” I added. “Although I don’t see a weapon nearby.”
An angry man strutted over, tugging on his beard. “I said cut!”
It was then that I saw the movie cameras and the stars and crew standing on the sidelines.
“Oh my! You mean you’re shooting a movie?” I asked.
“A murder mystery actually. Your tour guide should have never allowed you to leave the tram,” the man seethed.
“I didn’t let them do anything,” Cindy explained. “They jumped off when they spotted the body.”
“We’re investigators back home in Tawas,” Eleanor exclaimed. “We’ve found plenty of bodies. As a matter of fact, we have an important meeting with a director today.”
I quickly elbowed Eleanor gently so she wouldn’t tell everyone who we were here to meet. “We didn’t mean to interrupt you,” I said. “We’ll get out of your hair.”
“You certainly have plenty of it,” Eleanor added with a chuckle.
“If you’d kindly get back on the tram,” Cindy directed.
“I’ll have someone transport them to their appointment,” the director said. “They’ve already proven that they can’t listen to simple instructions. None of us can afford to have our budgets compromised.”
I was about to open my mouth to retort that it wasn’t our intent, but as the golf cart pulled up we were instructed to hop in.
“See what you did, girls? I’ll never get to Skull Island now,” Mr. Wilson grumbled.
Eleanor’s eyes widened when she steadied me as I nearly tumbled out of the car as the driver whizzed through the lot.
“Be careful, Agnes,” Eleanor said.
“Thanks, old girl, I almost made a turn for the worse.”
“Don’t do that. Not when we have such an important meeting.”
I trembled slightly. “I must admit I’m a little nervous.”
“But this might be our big break.”
“If you don’t mind, I’d rather not hear the word break. I feel as if I’m about to break a hip.”
“Or a leg.” Eleanor grinned. “Now that’s a leg worth breaking don’t you think?”
“I must say I was shocked when Roman Douglas’s secretary called about the appointment.”
“It must be about the contract. Why else would Roman pay our way to Hollywood?”
“Whee!” Mr. Wilson said as he threw his arms skyward as if he was on a rollercoaster.
My husband Andrew caught frail Mr. Wilson just in time, so we didn’t lose him on the turn. Mr. Wilson, Eleanor’s husband, insists we call him Mr. Wilson. His walker was also along for the ride. While Wilson’s emaciated frame might lead one to believe he’d be knocking at death’s door any day, he’s one of the more lively residents of Tawas, Michigan, one who will constantly keep you in stitches.
I met my husband’s laughing hazel eyes and we exchanged a knowing glance. I was glad Eleanor and I were able to bring our husbands with us. My Andrew is an attorney. It’s always good to have one of those hanging around to make sure the provisions of the contract Eleanor and I signed with Roman were followed to the letter. I’ll have to keep Andrew close. The silver fox has already gathered more than a few admiring glances.
I shifted in my seat and massaged my sore knee, incurred thanks to my collision with a flight attendant’s beverage cart compliments of turbulence. My seventy-two-year-old body felt beyond my years, but I tried not to complain. Eleanor’s more generous frame seemed to never suffer the effects of aging and she’s eighty-two!
The golf cart came to an abrupt stop and we clambered off to be whisked away by a woman talking into her headpiece, “Your two o’clock is here, Mr. Douglas.” She then nodded and smiled in our direction. “Roman is busy today, so I hope you can keep up.”
I narrowed my eyes slightly at the blonde poured into her black trousers and silk blouse. “I’m Agnes Barton and this is Eleanor Mason, her husband Mr. Wilson, and my husband Andrew Hart. Back in Tawas we make introductions when we meet someone.”
When the young woman didn’t say anything, Eleanor said, “I don’t think she heard you right, or is possibly ignoring you Agnes.”
“Speak up, young lady,” Mr. Wilson demanded. “Unless you plan to stand here all day. I, for one, need to get out of this sun.”
Andrew laughed and the woman finally relaxed somewhat and said, “I’m Mr. Douglas’s assistant Donna. May we continue now?”
“Of course,” I said, satisfied for the moment. I wasn’t used to being out of Michigan, and I hoped that not everyone we met in Los Angeles acted like Donna.
We followed Donna, who led us through a doorway to the smiling director Roman Douglas. He was dressed comfortably in brown trousers and white button-down shirt opened at the neck. He was in his sixties, and although he dyed his hair black, the tips of his brow were silver.
I jumped when Roman clapped his hands in greeting. Andrew slinked his arm around me to help steady my nerves.
“I’m so happy you were able to come to Hollywood,” Roman said. “Donna, bring my guests bottled water. It’s quite a scorcher out there today.”
Eleanor fanned her face with her hands. “You’re so right. We’re not used to the heat.”
Roman nodded. “Let’s head over to one of the offices.”
They followed Roman past trailers and into an office. “This office belongs to the production manager, but at least it’s air conditioned.”
Roman motioned to the leather furniture, where Eleanor, Mr. Wilson, Andrew and I sat opposite Roman, who reclined in a chair.
He tapped his fingers impatiently until Donna darted into the room and handed out the water before taking a seat near Roman.
“As I’ve said before, I’m glad you were able to make the trip. I’m hoping you’ll be pleased that our production team will be unleashed on your small town.”
“In Tawas?”
“I didn’t know the script was finished,” Andrew said.
Roman met Andrew’s eyes. “I’m happy that you were able to be here Andrew. Your credentials are impressive.”
“As are yours. I’d be a fool if I wasn’t here to oversee the progress of the script. We expected to receive our copy before now.”
“You’re no fool. You’re an intelligent and capable attorney.”
“Hey what about me?” Mr. Wilson said with a frown. “I’m impressive too. I’m an expert in the art of falling asleep in my chair.”
Roman laughed. “I need to practice that skill.”
“You do know we’re in the room too, right?” Eleanor asked.
“What Eleanor means is that we’d love to see the script. We’d hate to think we came here only for the sunshine, not that I’m complaining, mind you,” I said.
Roman picked up a remote control and clicked on a television. YouTube came on with a video of Eleanor and me questioning a gas station attendant about the disappearance of a young man.
My cheeks reddened as I watched. I was more than a little bit embarrassed to watch myself on the video. We looked like the joke of the week, and only now did I notice the slight smile plastered on the clerk’s face.
“That was shot without our permission,” Eleanor remarked. “We didn’t even know it was taped.”
Roman nodded and scrolled down to the video views. “This video has been viewed more than one-hundred thousand times. My wife Coco insisted I take a look at it, and that’s what convinced me to make a movie about your antics.”
“Because your wife liked the video?” I asked.
“Because it’s great.
You and Eleanor are so comical, and it comes so naturally to you in this skit.”
“It might be because we’re really like that,” I said.
“And we make the perfect team,” Eleanor added.
Roman took a long drink of his water and set it down before saying, “I think you two are the greatest thing since Murder, She Wrote.”
“Be careful, I see a lawsuit headed our way,” Andrew said.
“I hope you’ve prepared Tawas for our arrival,” Roman said.
“Do you have the script or not?” Andrew asked.
“I’ve sent our writers to Tawas. They’ve been compiling information and stories about the two of you. I love the idea of two senior citizen sleuths, and ones who have found love much later in life.”
“Well, romance doesn’t end at thirty,” Mr. Wilson said with a throaty chuckle.
Andrew shook his head. “And the script?”
“The movie would be right up the Hallmark Channel’s avenue. Donna, here, has a few family members that work at Hallmark. I’m confident they’d pick it up.”
“Wow,” is all Eleanor could say.
“Of course, we’re getting ahead of ourselves,” Andrew said. “Unless you have the script you’ll be wasting your time. The contract gives Agnes and Eleanor final approval of the script.”
Roman massaged his chin. “The script should be finished this week, but the trucks are heading to your town as we speak.”
“When will they arrive?” Andrew asked with a furrowed brow.
“I’d think a few day from now. They left earlier this week,” Donna said.
“We don’t have much time then,” I said. “We’ll have to take the first plane back to Michigan.”
“Are you certain you want the movie going forward when the script isn’t complete, Agnes?” Andrew asked.
“I’m fine with it,” Eleanor said, “besides the trucks are on the way already.”
“I agree with Eleanor,” I said. “We can’t have the crew sitting around doing nothing until the final script is approved. The writers might feel more inspired in Tawas.”
“Thank you for your confidence ladies. I look forward to working together on this project.” Roman tried to ease my doubts. “And I’m confident you’ll love the script. I want to portray both of you accurately.”
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