by Mimi Barbour
Liam shook his head sadly and a sound of disgust escaped. “An award for killing.”
“No, an award for bravery and for saving a fellow soldier. Because of you, Harry Ryan is with his family today and not underground in one of those sad graves in Arlington.”
The words slowly filtered through his tortured brain. In the depths of his despair, relief began to surge throughout his stressed, coiled body. The stiffness in his back let go, and for the first time in months, he felt able to slouch and totally relax his muscles. Exhausted, he laid his head back against the couch and let the shudders wrack his body and soul. His eyes remained closed while the tears poured steadily.
Finally he sighed, and then he swore. Clearing his throat and letting his hands fall loosely next to him, he lay back exhausted. Peace invaded the emptiness left by the tears. Words he’d yelled out rang in his ears like a litany of defense. Because he’d had no choice! A melody of forgiveness stretched from his head to his heart. Because he’d had no choice!
He felt the cushion next to him depress, and a hand lifted and cradled his. He grasped the fingers tightly, appreciating the rubs and pats from the other man. Words couldn’t have soothed him as much as the touch from his father.
Slowly his head slid down to nestle against the shoulder of the man he’d never understood, or in truth, liked or respected very much.
“Tell me why you let me go?”
“If you’re asking why I let you go to war, the answer is because of my respect for your choices. If you’re asking why I let your mother rule this house and drive you away from me, it’s because you loved your mother and I loved you.” The simple words were spoken in a voice ripened by regret.
“Aw, Dad. Why did I blame you?”
“Son, I’m not blind, nor am I stupid. But your mother was my adored wife, and I couldn’t hurt her any more than I could hurt you. In my mind, no one had the right to denigrate her, myself included. Even though I knew she did so to me.”
“Couldn’t you see what she was doing? How she turned me against you, belittling and blaming you for everything that ever happened to her? Why didn’t you put a stop to it?”
“How? You tell me how to force someone’s respect and love. Beat her? Hurt her feelings? Put her down to build myself up?”
“That’s what she did constantly.”
A sigh escaped, and the older man lifted their hands to lay a soft kiss on Liam’s. “I know. I’ll try to explain, but the medical terms are beyond me at the moment. The simple explanation—what you never knew because we waited too long to tell you—was that your mother had a brain tumor that often put increased intracranial pressure on her brain and made her suffer those personality anomalies.
“When I first met her, she was like a beautiful butterfly, flitting from flower to flower, never resting or stopping her search, a constant source of joy to a man who’d grown up in a home full of dour people with sour faces. In the earlier years, I called her my sexy little dynamo. Son, she was something to see. Back then, she treated me like a king.” The sigh following lasted a long time. “But the tumor began to grow, and she changed.”
Liam saw the tears his dad couldn’t hide, heard them in the broken, hoarse-sounding voice, and it became his turn to empathize.
“I wish I’d known her then.”
“Oh, you did, son. Didn’t you ever figure out why she held your heart and only anger came my way? Because from the time you were born until you were a teen, she put all her energy and devotion into helping you become the man you are today. My only regret is that we didn’t sit you down and explain the circumstances.”
“I wish you would have.”
“I see now that we did things wrong. God’s honest truth? Don’t know if I would’ve done them any differently, though. What can I say? I loved her.”
The vibrating of Liam’s cell phone dancing across the counter grabbed both men’s attention. Exhaustion fading, he rushed over and lifted it to his ear and listened.
Then he said, “I’m only a short ways away. Wait for me. I’m coming with you.” Liam hit End, unplugged the gadget, and pushed it into his jeans pocket.
“You were right. The artist remembered the place and gave directions. Seems the property was owned by their mother’s side of the family and they inherited on her death. It’s still listed under the name of Baker and so never showed up on the radar. Good call, Dad.”
“Guess they’re moving in tonight?”
“Yep. And I’m tagging along for the ride.” Liam stopped, and with his right hand, he massaged his neck. Both feet shuffled in place, and the memory of being a little kid surfaced. Finally he spoke. “Thanks, Dad. Can’t tell you how much better I feel.”
His father stood up, and they hugged like men do who understand each other perfectly. Then Paul slapped his back gently one more time and stepped away. “Anytime, son…oh, and keep me posted. You know I’m interested.”
Chapter Twenty-Two
Sadie had to get away from the crazies. Their cheeriness was driving her nuts. And the continual banter gave her a headache. Begging to be excused, she decided that a walk would give her the solitude she hungered for, the quiet time alone to dwell on the man who never left her thoughts.
To haul Susie along seemed ludicrous, since the dog hated her walks, but this time, for some strange reason, she wouldn’t be left behind. Sensitive to the emotions of her favorite people, she must have decided Sadie needed company.
Leashes weren’t necessary along the lakefront, but in case there was traffic along the road, Sadie decided to take one anyway. Then she slipped on the matching cardigan to her lovely sundress and grabbed her flip-flops.
It was an evening for romance. Streaks of rainbow brilliance tinted the blue sky to a vista of wonder that made her catch her breath. The low-flying birds sang their thanks for the beautiful day, and tranquility seeped into her very bones. When thoughts of Liam floated into her quietness, she wished desperately that he were there with her, sauntering, hand in hand.
A vision of their lovemaking invaded as it had been doing since the night before, haunting her, and she replayed every moment over and over, each time more incensed that the phone had rung. She’d loved being held in his strong arms against his hard chest, and had especially liked the sensation of feeling so petite…and, well, beloved.
Tingles swept over her tense back, spread to tease her breasts, and then gathered with a force to attack down below, where her body still screamed from being abandoned. Doubtless they’d finish off what they’d started, and her mind played scenarios of just how it could happen…when, and where...
She was so engrossed she didn’t hear her name being called the first time. The rather pale, overweight fellow had to run right up to her, panting and red-faced, before she realized that another person occupied the beach as well as herself.
“Sadie, it is you, isn’t it? I wasn’t sure at first, but then I recognized your hair, and I remembered your cottage was close.”
Oh, god in heaven, how could you be so mean?
Derrick Slater, the guy she disliked more than broccoli—and she hated broccoli—had appeared like a bad omen, considering where her mind had been. Could she pretend she didn’t recognize him? Nah, he’d see through the ploy and have even less respect for her than he’d had before.
“Hi, Derrick.” Damned if she’d chatter and be friendly.
“You look...ahhh, great!” He did that disgusting trick with his beady eyes as they scanned her body. “What have you been up to? Married? Kids?”
“Nope…” Who knew disgust could react in such a physical way, like wanting to throw up, for instance.
“Gee, if I’d known, I’d have called.”
“Then I’m glad you didn’t know.” Seriously, pervie? You can’t see the loathing I’m not even trying to hide?
“You’re kidding, right? You always did like to joke around. We could have a good time together again. Give me your number, and I’ll give you a call.”
&
nbsp; “Derrick, if you were the last sucker left breathing in a world of the dead, I’d shoot myself first.” Now she smiled.
A deadpan expression replaced his false jovialness, and she knew it had sunk in—she wasn’t joking.
“Once a bitch, always a bitch!” He spat the words, then tried to leave too quickly. His foot caught on a branch; he tripped, and windmilled his arms to stay upright. It didn’t work. He landed hard.
Sadie turned away but threw her response over her shoulder. “Once a little prick, always a little prick!”
The shakes struck within a few more steps. Thank goodness the trees would block her from his view. Devastated, she needed to hide. Quickly, she stumbled to her once favorite rock and hugged her knees, which gave her the perfect nest to bury her tear-stained face.
The sicko still didn’t get it. He’d made her a laughingstock. Everyone read Facebook, and to have details of losing her virginity plastered all over his page had revolted her for a long time. The adjectives he’d used came back to haunt her—“little butterball,” “chubby love princess.”
She could almost forgive him if he’d needed to prove his own masculinity, but that hadn’t been the case. Back in the day, he’d been buff and his popularity had gotten him lots of girls.
It must have been her fault. She’d been the negative. Not good enough for him or any boy. Fat, pimply, and so unhappy—she recognized the feeling as it flooded over her once again.
“Sadie? Honey? Are you all right?” Bea, in her favorite green muumuu, stood in front of her, dismay apparent in her expression. Susie approached also, whined her disapproval, and then slumped at Sadie’s feet.
Sadie sniffed and surreptitiously wiped the tears on the sleeve of her sweater. “Sure, Ma. I’m fine. Wind blew some sand in my eyes.”
“Let me see.” Bea lifted Sadie’s face to hers and examined her carefully. “Don’t see any sand, just a lot of pain. Want to tell me about it?”
Sadie wrenched her face away and turned in the other direction, hoping the hint would work.
Not with Bea, it didn’t. “Was that Derrick ‘Scumbag’ Slater I saw talking with you on the beach?”
Sadie’s heartbeats seemed to stop, then restart, but revved up to twice their normal speed. “You know…about Derrick Slater?”
“Oh, yeah! We all did. Ever heard about his famous case of the runs when he had to leave the football field in the middle of a game? That was Maggie playing payback. Then the principal mysteriously searched his locker due to an anonymous caller accusing him of drug dealing?”
“And they caught him with a bag of Viagra?”
“Dora went a bit crazy, but what the heck. At her age, it was all she could think of doing.”
Tickled, Sadie said, “Where did she get the Viagra?”
“Some things you don’t ask.” Bea grinned, and Sadie couldn’t help herself. She returned it, moved over to give her mother room to sit, and reached for her hand to hold.
“And what did you do?”
“Who mwa?” As her finger pointed at her chest, Bea’s expression became as innocent as a bookie’s.
Sadie looked at her mother and began to chuckle.
“Well, I might have accidently backed into his father’s Lexus when he had it parked up on the point. Seems he had plans to seduce another poor innocent. Soon put a stop to that nonsense, I did.”
"You followed him?" Shocked laughter escaped.
"Happened to see him drive by, and I might have been a bit curious as to where he might be heading." The self-satisfied grin Bea wore made the coldness Sadie had experienced earlier fade completely, to be replaced with a wonderful kind of warmth. Knowing she was loved so much woke something up inside.
“I never knew.”
“You wouldn’t talk about it. We all tried, but you shut down. Trust me, Sadie. It broke our hearts to see you hurting so badly.”
“God, I love you, Ma.”
“I love you too, my beautiful little girl. You’ve always been my favorite.”
Sadie laughed. “You say that to all of us.”
“Yes, and I mean it. Are you still going to go for a walk? I can hold dinner for an hour, if you’d like to do a bit more daydreaming.” First she winked, and then she stood and stretched. “I’ll open the chips and dip to keep the girls happy until you return, and then we’ll cook supper.”
“Thanks, Mom. Think I will stroll up the shoreline for a bit.” Sadie looked over toward where the land curved inwards. She remembered a lovely farm nestled in trees there. It had an awesome view, and that would be the perfect distance to take Susie for the rest of their walk.
Chapter Twenty-Three
Sadie and her lazy bloodhound wandered along to a point where the road intersected with the shoreline. Hesitating at the intersection, Sadie stopped to pet her friend before heading back through the high grass towards the water, where the view made walking worthwhile. The noise of the truck barreling around the corner made her jump back to get out of the way.
Stupid idiot, slow down!
She stared at the back of the truck and saw a tiny body in the window, a Pomeranian with the prettiest red coloring—and a face she recognized. Peppi knew her also, and reacted by barking hysterically.
Sadie hurried after the vehicle and watched as the taillights disappeared in the distance. It was travelling at such a high speed she couldn't possibly keep up and therefore had no idea which of the turnoffs it would have taken in the road ahead.
Since darkness was fast approaching, danger lurked in the tall grass and uneven road. She couldn't keep up this pace. She'd have to slow down. Bent over, clutching the burning in her side, Sadie tried to catch her breath. Could the other dogs be with Peppi? Had she accidentally stumbled on the route to the hideout where the thieves were holding the stolen dogs?
If she could find whichever lane they'd turned into, she could call Liam. Maybe he and Stan would be able to send help to rescue the stolen pets.
But there were a multitude of houses along this stretch. How in the world… Hold it. The sweater she wore was the exact one she had worn the last time she'd walked Peppi. She remembered holding the squirming bundle while Liam tightened the collar he'd escaped from to run free for three blocks. Would it still have enough scent for Susie to follow? Was she good enough to be able to find him from inside a moving truck?
What the heck? It was a chance. She had to try. Glancing around, she found the bloodhound had disappeared. Oh, no! Don't tell me she gave up and went home. In her excitement, Sadie had forgotten all about Susie. No, there she came, ambling along at her own speed, slow but steady.
"Susie, you sweetheart. I knew you wouldn't leave me out here all alone." Sadie wrapped her arms around multi flaps of skin, ruffled the pendulous ears, and kissed the air above the slobbering muzzle.
For all that loving, she got back a woof and a glare from bloodshot eyes that clearly showed disdain for her exhausted state. The dog sank onto the grass, slumped into a pile of fur, and sighed.
"No, Susie. You've got work to do. No resting until we find Peppi." Taking off her cardigan, she held it to Susie's nose and gave her the order. "Go find."
From the disinterest in her eyes, if the dog could speak, her words would most likely be, "You've got to be kidding, right?"
Sadie couldn't believe it. Susie had papers for being a purebred tracker. Shouldn’t all that pure blood be loaded with little tracker genes? And once a smell got introduced and the order given, the dog's need to deliver would become paramount? Not for Susie.
Trust her mom to choose a dud. "Come on, Susie." This time Sadie put the garment right over her face and mashed it onto her nose. "Poor little Peppi needs us! Now go find her."
Susie sneezed. And lay over on her side. This time her disgusted sigh went on forever.
Just then Sadie remembered the granola bar in her pocket. Susie loved the silly bars.
A chunk of treat, another quick sniff, and Susie got into the game. "That's my girl. Go find Pep
pi."
Howling, Susie took off—straight down the turnoff that curved around the lake to where the pretty little farmhouse sat in the distance. "Okay, Susie, good girl. This must be where they're holding the dogs." As the two crept closer, Sadie heard the distant pandemonium of barking as it wafted on the night breeze.
She had to get closer. "Lie down, Susie. Stay."
Darned if the mutt didn't obey for once. Folding up like an empty fur coat dropped on the floor, she gave an agreeable woof and closed her eyes.
Sadie tied her leash loosely to the nearest tree, fed her the last of her healthy human treat, and moved forward carefully. Little by little, she got closer to where the yard lights lit an enclosure between the barn and the house.
In the distance, she heard men speaking, but until she actually hid behind the picket fence, she didn't know what was being said.
"Damn, those puppies stink. You better get them outta the van and into the barn. Bradford left orders. Five of them need to be groomed and ready to be delivered to the store Monday morning."
"Hey, why me? I hate the little suckers. It's bad enough putting up with the ones I have here. Stupid Pom got loose and took off. Had to drive for an hour to find him…ended up on the beach playing with some kids. I was pissed, but couldn't give the damn mutt what-for ’cause the little snooty-nosed buggers thought it was so cute."
For the last two words, the jerk's voice rose trying to imitate a child, but his raspy tone just sounded crude and cruel. "Probably would have blabbed to Mommy if I'd a smacked it there. Let me tell you, when I get through with that blasted animal, it won't be running anymore." Sadie peered over the fence and saw the same truck that had passed her parked next to the van. Peppi's face could still be seen in the window.
"Yeah, well, tell it to someone who cares. I just spent the whole day—all the way from Oklahoma—locked in the van with 25 of those squalling rats, and I've had it up to my ears with their pissing and shitting everywhere. Van reeks like the outhouse on my old place in Kentucky."
