But that doesn’t feel right either.
If what they’re saying is right, and there is anything I can do to help, I don’t think I’d be able to live with myself if I just left them to fend for themselves. I’d probably end up like Asher’s grandmother, trying to get rid of the guilt years later.
They’re all still staring at me, but I don’t know what to do.
“I don’t know,” I finally say. “I—I need a few minutes. To think.” I press a hand to my pounding head.
Immediately Evangeline jumps up. “Of course you do. You’re probably exhausted. After everything you’ve gone through.” She starts leading me down the hall and to the first room on the left.
She pushes open the door to reveal a bedroom decorated in pink. She gestures to the bed. “Please. Rest. You know where to find me if you need me.”
I nod and sit on the side of the bed while she stands awkwardly in the doorway. After a minute, she turns and leaves, looking lost.
I know the feeling. I feel lost myself. Engrossed in my thoughts, I don’t hear the door open, and when Asher’s head pops into my line of view, I have to stifle a scream.
He laughs when I swat at him. “Asher! Don’t do that!”
“Sorry,” he says, still laughing.
I make room for him on the bed and he sits next to me.
We sit in easy silence, until finally he breaks it by saying, “You know that I’m not on the side of you dying, right?”
Surprised, I jerk my head up to look at him. “Of course!”
“And that I didn’t bring you here to betray you?”
I blink. “Of course you didn’t. I’ve known from the beginning that the only reason you brought me here was to help me. You’ve been incredibly kind. Thank you.”
“Don’t thank me,” he says. “It wasn’t entirely selfless on my part.”
“You mean how you’re trying to make up to Gavin by helping me?”
“No. At first that was the reason. Then I got to know you and I was doing it for you. You seemed to be able to see right through me and yet … you still liked me. I think.” He looks up at me and I nod. He smiles; then it falls and he continues. “That doesn’t happen to me very often. Even my own father isn’t exactly fond of me. I thought I was falling in love with you. I kind of hoped I was because it would have made things so much easier. And I convinced myself that it was mutual.” He sighs. “And if it wasn’t, that with time, maybe it would be.”
My eyes widen as I stare at him. I open my mouth to say something, but I’m so shocked that nothing comes out.
He only laughs. “Yeah. That’s what I thought. Don’t worry. I’ve realized that’s not gonna happen. And it’s okay. Because I do love you. It’s just not that kind of love.”
“I—I don’t understand.”
He takes my hand, running a thumb over the back of it. “You didn’t realize what Eli was saying back there. Did you?”
“About him being my dad? Yeah, I get it.”
He shakes his head. “No. Not exactly. Remember what my grandma said about him? About them?” He emphasizes the “them” and stares at me as I frown.
Then slowly I get it. “About them being lovers?”
He looks uncomfortable, squirming a little in his seat, but nods. “What if she was pregnant when she left here?” His eyes bore into mine. “What if my mom is Eli’s daughter, too?”
“No. That can’t be right.” Can it? Do I have family out there I didn’t even know about? I stare at Asher. Is he part of my family?
He smiles when he sees I understand and his hand grips mine. “You get it now, don’t you?”
I slowly nod.
“When Eli said that you were his daughter, it surprised me that it didn’t bother me as much as it should have, you know? Because he was my grandma’s boyfriend, for God’s sake, and that meant you were—well, you could be … I realized that it could mean you were family. And it should have been so disgusting, but it’s not, because I see you more like my sister than a girl.” He laughs. “That didn’t come out right. And that’s why I get so pissed off at Gavin for the way he treats you sometimes. I’m not jealous—” He bumps my shoulder with his. “—I’m just watching out for my sister.”
I stare at him, my heart bursting with happiness. Family. Real family. Someone who actually wants to be my family, instead of just tolerating my existence.
I smile at him, then hug him tightly, tears brimming in my eyes. He hugs me back.
“Do you think it’s true?” I ask.
“I don’t know. It seems possible.” He shrugs. “I kind of like the idea of you being my sister.”
“You realize I’d actually be your aunt, right?” I ask, grinning.
He rolls his eyes. “Please. You’re little-sister material all the way.”
Laughing, I feel lighter than air. I can’t wait to tell Gavin this new revelation. I’ve no doubt he’ll be happy for me. And maybe this will help him bridge that ridiculous gap between them.
He nudges my shoulder again, before standing and walking to the door. “I know this is probably the hardest decision you’ll ever have to make, but I just want you to know that I’m behind you. No matter what you decide.” Without saying another word, he steps out of the room.
For a few minutes, I just stare at the open door, trying to gather my thoughts, until Gavin knocks. He steps in without waiting for an answer and joins me on the bed, linking his fingers with mine.
“You’re not seriously thinking of staying, are you?”
“I don’t know. If Mother has done half the things they say, I can’t just walk away.”
He opens his mouth, then shuts it, before sighing. “We can’t stay, Evie. You know that. I won’t take the chance of you getting hurt again, and Mother is dangerous. There’s no way she’s just going to let you stroll in and tell her she can’t live here anymore.”
“But there’s no one else to help them. You heard them. I’m the only one.”
“So they say. What if you never came back at all? What would they have done then?”
“But I did.”
“But what if you didn’t?” He pushes off the bed to pace, then stops in front of me. “You are under no obligation to help them. In fact, they have no right”—he balls his hands into fists—“no right, to ask this of you. They’re your family. Any parent would have saved their daughter’s life without asking for payment. And they lost the right to ask you for help when they gave you to the psychotic woman and let her brainwash you, repeatedly.” He goes on, getting louder and more animated by the second.
Finally I cut into his diatribe.
“Gavin?” I ask, looking at him.
He stops, frowning at me. “What?”
“You’re not helping.”
He stares at me. “You’re not just going to make me watch you walk into that black widow’s lair. I won’t do it, Evie. Not this time. I’ve already had to endure being back here. I won’t let you do this.”
At that, anything I would have said flies out of my mind. “You’re not going to let me?” I push up from the bed.
His eyes widen at my tone and he starts to say something, but I interrupt. “Gavin, I appreciate everything you’ve done for me. I understand this hasn’t been easy. But just because I don’t remember much about my life before we met doesn’t mean I’m your property. You don’t let me do anything. If I choose to help them, I will do so and there will be nothing you can do to stop me.” I turn around so my back is to him, then gesture to the door. “You may leave.”
“But, Evie, wait. That’s not what I—”
“You may leave,” I repeat, swallowing the lump of rage and hurt balling in my throat.
He sighs, but I hear him leave the room, his shoes dragging across the floor. He pauses at the door momentarily, but then he keeps going without saying anything.
* * *
An hour later, I’ve made my decision. I carefully make my way back to the living room to stand at the doorway,
being a silent observer for the minute or so before anyone sees me.
Evangeline is talking quietly with Eli in a corner of the room. Their backs are to me, and I can’t hear what they’re saying, but they look nervous. Gavin sits on the couch, curled into himself.
I take a deep breath and instantly feel everyone’s eyes on mine. Waiting for an answer I don’t want to give because I know what it’ll mean and what I’ll have to do. When I look up, I meet Asher’s gaze first. He nods once and I close my eyes in relief. At least someone is standing by me.
When I open them again, I look all of them in the face, stopping last on Gavin. His eyes narrow, but I don’t look away. I want him to know this is something I have to do. I can’t just let Mother’s tyranny continue. She’s already taken everything from me; I can’t let her destroy any more lives. Not if I have even the smallest chance of stopping it.
I turn to my parents. “I’ll do it. For Elysium.” To Asher. “For my family.” Then to Gavin. “For us.”
A war of words breaks out around me. Gavin is the first up and I expect him to start on me, but he pushes his face into Eli’s, screaming as loud as I’ve ever heard. Eli is screaming right back, gesturing to where I sit. I can’t hear anything as everyone is fighting to talk over each other.
The only one not yelling is Asher, who is watching me intently. So intently I wonder if he’s trying to tell me something. For a minute, we just sit there watching each other, letting the words crash over us before he breaks it with his signature smile. As if to say, “I’ve got this.”
I smile back. “Thank you,” I mouth, and he nods again, then tips his head toward the door, gesturing for me to exit while everyone is preoccupied.
Then he stands and enters the fight, while I slip quietly to my room to contemplate how to take Mother down.
CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE
My daughter has returned to me, as I knew she would. After all, she is my creation. And like anything that requires programming by an outside influence, it is inevitable that she should return to her creator.
Especially when programmed to do so.
—EXCERPT FROM MOTHER’S JOURNAL
Mother
I watch the monitor and smile. They actually believe they got into Elysium without me knowing. I didn’t become the Governess by being a fool. I am Evelyn’s Mother. Everyone’s Mother. And nothing escapes me.
I turn to Dr. Friar behind me. “You made sure he got everything he needed?”
“Yes. I made sure the staff was otherwise entertained so all he had to do was ‘sneak’ in and grab it.” He tips his head to the side, that sly smile twinkling in his eyes. “Poor man. Seemed in such a hurry. Didn’t even notice it was unusually quiet in the Medical Sector. I do hope nothing is wrong.”
I laugh and lean against the back of my chair. “Fantastic.” Then a thought occurs to me. “How much of her memory will he be able to recover?”
“Not much, I’m afraid. With the reactivation she may get them all back eventually, but it will be very slow. You’d probably have more success planting new ones.”
I nod and lean into my mirror, checking the line of my eyeliner. I press a light finger to the small wrinkles to the side. “Make sure you have everything you need to make that happen.” I look at him through the mirror. “She’s probably already said yes. They won’t wait long. And I’m eager to continue Evelyn’s training now that she’s passed her test. I must say, I’m pleased that she’s brought these fabulous new specimens with her.” The side of my mouth lifts. “Such a lovely surprise.”
There’s a soft knock on the door. “Come,” I say.
One of my Maids pokes her head through the opening. “Enforcer Lydia here to see you, ma’am.”
I clap my hands. “Wonderful. Send her in.”
The Maid quickly disappears to be replaced with the girl Evelyn’s age who has taken over as lead Enforcer since Evelyn and that Surface Dweller killed my last leader. She stands just inside the door, staring over my head with her trained gaze. I know she sees everything, even when it looks like she sees nothing.
“The situation is under control,” she says, her voice as flat as the floor my chair is sitting on.
“The girl?”
“She’s been relocated to Enforcer training.”
“And her poor mother?”
“Eliminated.”
My smile creeps across my face. “Very good. You may go.” I waggle my fingers at the door and spin back around in my seat to look in the mirror again.
“Problems?” Dr. Friar asks.
“None. Everything is going exactly according to plan.”
Acknowledgments
As always, turning a manuscript into a novel takes many more people than just the lonely author, writing in her garret. I will never be able to thank everyone who’s helped make the mess of words that was originally Revelations into the book it is now without making this a novel itself, so I’m not even going to try. *smiles*
A huge thanks to my wonderful agent, Natalie Lakosil, for being in my corner when I needed her the most. And to my editor, Mel, for her awesome insight and for seeing once again the story I was trying to tell and helping me pull it out. And as always, a huge thanks to the cover artist, Eithne, and Tor’s art director Seth for yet another beautiful cover.
I definitely couldn’t have done this without the support of my family, specifically, my husband, for all those late nights helping me see the simple solutions to the problems I was trying to make more complicated than they needed to be, and for my children for putting up with all the time my imaginary friends took all my attention.
And to my crit partner Liz Czukas for all the brainstorming sessions and for talking me down from all the last-minute freak-outs. Thank you so, so much.
And to my crit partner Larissa Hardesty for making sure my story had heart and soul and wasn’t just a mess of words.
A special shout-out and thank-you to Ryan Campbell and his daughter Cordelia for being my first “outside” readers. Your excitement and enthusiasm for my characters and writing gave me the courage to persevere through the dark until I saw the light. You both rock!
And, of course, thank you to God for giving me the talent and perseverance to make my dream a career.
And last but not least, a huge thank-you to all my fabulous readers that loved Renegade and loved and rooted for Evie and Gavin. I hope you enjoy the new chapter of their story. I couldn’t do this without you. XOXO.
TOR TEEN BOOKS BY J. A. SOUDERS
Renegade
Revelations
About the Author
J. A. Souders is the author of the Elysium Chronicles and lives with her husband and two children in the land of sunshine and palm trees, where she spends her time writing about the monsters under the bed, daydreaming about living in an underwater colony, and failing miserably at playing video games. She can usually be found wandering around the Internet at www.jasouders.com.
This is a work of fiction. All of the characters, organizations, and events portrayed in this novel are either products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously.
REVELATIONS
Copyright © 2013 by Jessica Souders
All rights reserved.
Front cover art by Eithne O’Halon
Back cover art by Getty Images
A Tor Teen Book
Published by Tom Doherty Associates, LLC
175 Fifth Avenue
New York, NY 10010
www.tor-forge.com
Tor® is a registered trademark of Tom Doherty Associates, LLC.
The Library of Congress has cataloged the print edition as follows:
Souders, J. A.
Revelations / J.A. Souders.—First edition.
p. cm.
“A Tom Doherty Associates book.”
ISBN 978-0-7653-3246-2 (hardcover)
ISBN 978-1-4668-0096-0 (e-book)
1. Undersea colonies—Fiction. 2. Secrets—Fiction. 3. Memory—Fiction.
4. Genetics—Fiction. 5. Science fiction. I. Title.
PZ7.S7246Rev 2013
[Fic]—dc23
2013023853
e-ISBN 9781466800960
First Edition: November 2013
Revelations (The Elysium Chronicles) Page 26
