The boy assessed his own clothing, looking a little worried. “Yep, that’s what Mom told me to wear. Do I look okay?”
“Oh yeah, of course, you look very handsome. Did you sleep well with your pal there?”
“Yeah, but I think he snores a little.”
Audrey chuckled and glanced at the dog, who was patiently sitting at the door. She set her coffee cup on the countertop of the island and started walking toward the door. “That he does, you’re right. Just like an old man. And this old man needs to pee. Do you want to come with us?”
The boy’s eyes widened, and he went straight for his shoes and light jacket. “Yeah! Can I hold his lead?”
“Sure.”
They walked for few minutes, Audrey demonstrating how to hold the leash without pulling too tight. Soon they found a comfortable rhythm, and the dog walked by Felix’s side in perfect obedience when they turned around to go back to the cabin. Felix looked up at her with pride, and she thought they would get along just fine. Then he started doing some kind of strange little dance, and she slapped herself mentally. “Oh God, you need to pee too, don’t you?”
“Yeah.”
“Okay. Give me the lead. Run.” He did just that, and when she entered the cabin a few seconds behind him, he was still in the bathroom, door wide open. “Did you make it, buddy?” Her question was soft and her fingers were crossed.
The voice that came out of the bathroom was small and filled with sadness. “Almost.”
Damn it. How could she think of the dog’s most basic need first thing in the morning and not think of the child’s? What an idiot. “It’s okay, Felix. I bet your mom packed extra clothes, right?” The reassuring tone she forced into her voice was for her own benefit as much as for his.
“I think so.”
“Stay right where you are. I’ll be right back.” She ran up to the loft and rummaged through the overnight bag Marielle had brought for Felix. Of course she’d packed extra clothes. She was a mother. Clean underwear and jeans. Right there. Audrey also found an extra shirt, but she left it in the bag, taking comfort in knowing it was there.
She ran back to the bathroom and found him standing half-naked in the middle of the room, his soiled clothes on the floor and the saddest look on his face. “I’m sorry, Audrey. I wet my pants like a baby.”
Her heart sank. “Oh, it’s okay, buddy. Accidents happen.” She grabbed a washcloth and proceeded to clean the boy with warm water and soap. He didn’t protest. “Tomorrow we’ll know to go to the bathroom before we walk Ralph, okay?” He nodded as she dried him, then handed him clean clothes. He dressed in silence, and she threw the wet underpants and jeans in the washer.
“All right, all taken care of. What about breakfast now?” The proposition finally got a small smile out of him, and they headed to the kitchen. “Your mom said you like cereal, but she didn’t say what kind, so you tell me, okay?” She opened the door to the pantry, and Felix’s jaw dropped at the sight of the top shelf. “Let’s see. We have Froot Loops, Lucky Charms, Honeycomb, Corn Pops, Frosted Flakes and Cheerios. What will it be?”
“Uh…”
She brought her attention down to the boy who was slowly taking in all the colorful boxes and realized she might have gone just a little overboard. How was she supposed to know what he liked? Marielle had just mentioned cereal, so Audrey had figured she would buy a few options. Felix finally pointed to the red box featuring the leprechaun. The sadness on his face had completely disappeared to be replaced with the most excited and contagious smile she’d ever seen. “Lucky Charms, uh? That’s my favorite. All right, then.” She fixed two ridiculously large bowls of cereal and set them on the counter. She stood ready to help him climb the tall barstool, but he made it all by himself.
They sat and ate their cereal quietly until Felix pointed to Ralph on the floor. “What’s that on his ears? Is he dirty?”
She followed the tiny finger, wondering if Ralph had gotten into some kind of mess without her knowledge and smiled when she realized Felix was simply referring to the pale tan ears of the otherwise all-white dog. “No, that’s not dirt. That’s from his mom.”
“What?” The puzzled look on his face was endearing.
“I’ll show you. Are you done with your cereal?”
He nodded, and she took the half-full bowls to the sink before going to the stairs, wiggling her finger for Felix to follow her up to the loft. She sat at her computer and turned it on. “Come here.” She was surprised when the boy made his way between her legs and set his hands on her thighs to prop himself up onto her lap. She grinned, happy that he seemed so at ease with her. She typed a few words on the keyboard, and before long the photo of a white dog resembling Ralph appeared on the screen. “See that? It’s a Maltese dog. Ralph’s daddy looks just like that.”
“He’s cute,” Felix declared with enthusiasm, turning to Audrey to smile at her.
She returned the smile and typed a few more words to make another photo pop up on the screen. “And that’s a Yorkshire terrier. That’s what Ralph’s mom looks like.”
He studied the photo and turned to her again, incredulous. “No way. Walph looks nothing like that.”
She giggled. “I know. He looks mostly like his daddy, but you see the color of this dog’s ears?”
He looked closely at the photo and proudly shouted, “They’re brown! Just like Walph’s!”
“Exactly. Ralph’s aren’t quite as dark, but they’re definitely tan, or brown as you say. And it’s not just the color. Do you see anything else about his mommy’s ears that’s different from his daddy’s?” She put both photos side by side on the computer screen and let the boy observe, amused by the seriousness of his investigation.
The moment he found the answer was evident. His eyes opened wider, and he pressed his finger to the screen. “Oh I know! His daddy’s ears fall down on the sides, see? And his mommy’s ears stand straight up on her head. Walph’s ears stand up on his head like his mommy’s. That’s so cool!”
She laughed, thinking how simple it was to make him cheerful. As she turned to the photos one more time, she glanced at the clock. “Oh shit. It’s almost seven. The bus will be here in a minute. Let’s go put on your jacket, Felix!” She forced him to stand from her lap and rushed to the stairs, turning back when she heard him giggle. “What? What’s so funny? We have to hurry, buddy, come on!”
“You said a naughty word.”
He kept giggling as she thought back on what she said. “Oh no. You’re right. It’s a very bad word. You should never say it, okay?”
He nodded. “I know, but you said it.”
She walked back behind the boy to gently push him toward the stairs. “I know, but I shouldn’t have. I won’t say it again, okay? Now let’s go.”
“Okay.” With that he stopped giggling and ran downstairs, where he put on his shoes and jacket while she grabbed his lunch out of the fridge. She held the book bag while he slid the straps onto his shoulders, then placed the lunch box in his hand and sent him out the door just as the bus was coming to a stop in front of her house. They waved at each other, and she watched him climb into the vehicle before finally closing the door behind her.
She sighed, her back against the door and a smirk on her lips. She’d made it through the first morning. And it hadn’t been that bad. Ralph sat by the door with his tail wagging. She walked to the kitchen and got more coffee, then stopped at the spiral staircase before going up to work when she noticed the dog wasn’t following her. Audrey turned to see him still sitting with his tail wagging, staring at the door. She observed in silence as he slowly stopped moving his tail and he finally lay down, never taking his eyes off the door and letting out a pitiful whimper, the same sound he made every time he accidentally pushed his favorite toy under the couch and Audrey was forced to retrieve it.
“I know, my man. But it’s okay. He’ll be back tonight. Come on, now.”
Ralph turned to her and back to the door one last time before rel
uctantly following her, his tail dragging between his legs.
* * *
Sam had come for breakfast and had left with Felix around nine o’clock. Marielle wanted to clean the house and do laundry, but she had the whole weekend, so she decided to linger outside to inspect her backyard for places where flower beds would have a better chance to thrive while she cleared her mind. It was a warmer than usual mid-May Saturday morning, and she didn’t have to run anywhere. As a result she was taken with a mixed sensation of freedom and hollowness, and she wasn’t sure she enjoyed it at all; in fact, she was on the verge of panicking.
Sam had seemed more relaxed this morning, almost at peace. He’d mentioned a promotion at work. She felt proud of him and touched that he’d shared the happy news with her. She’d heard nightmare stories where men would hide promotions for fear of having to pay higher child support. Of course, Sam wasn’t paying child support. They hadn’t spoken of divorce and weren’t even officially separated yet. Should they keep the house? She couldn’t afford it without Sam’s help, could she? They would have to talk about all of that, but Marielle knew they would do so calmly and with everyone’s well-being in mind. This morning’s breakfast was only a beginning. They’d shared toast, eggs and bacon in harmony, acting more like a family than they had in years.
Marielle took a deep breath of the crisp morning air and let it out slowly. Two weeks ago the thought of selling the house and going back to a duplex or even buying a condo wouldn’t have bothered her, but now she had Audrey. She couldn’t believe how quickly Audrey had become an important part of her life. She’d started out as a friend, but she’d quickly become someone Marielle trusted with the care of her child. She was depending on Audrey, and she no longer felt guilty about that. It was the one aspect of her life she was convinced made sense, strangely enough.
When she told Sam about Felix staying with their neighbor three nights a week, he didn’t seem overjoyed, but he didn’t debate it. Instead, he turned to Felix at the breakfast table and asked him if he liked staying next door. As Marielle expected, Felix went into details about how cool Audrey and her dog were with his irresistible enthusiasm, and Sam could only smile. The only thing Sam asked was to be able to meet Audrey, which Marielle thought was completely reasonable.
Sam and Marielle had remained vague about their new living arrangements. They told Felix that Daddy was going to live with a friend but he and Mommy still loved him very much and he and Daddy would spend their weekends together doing awesome stuff like fishing and camping. Marielle saw questions in Felix’s expressive eyes but also excitement at the promise of all the different activities he would be doing with his father. She would handle the questions as they came out of her son’s mind and hoped she would find the right answers.
Marielle heard a high-pitched bark and automatically looked for Ralph. There he was, tail wagging at the end of his leash. Audrey waved at her, wearing jeans, a gray T-shirt that hugged her shape perfectly and well-worn hiking boots. Marielle returned Audrey’s wave as Audrey walked across the street toward the park, which she’d mentioned she hiked through every weekend. Marielle quickly considered her own tank top, thin, hooded jacket, jeans and Nike shoes and concluded she was dressed for the part.
“Hey! Wait a minute,” she called after her.
Audrey turned around and waited for Marielle to reach her. Marielle was out of breath after running the short distance that separated them but still managed a smile before she asked, “Mind if I join you guys?” She bent down to scratch Ralph’s neck without taking her eyes off Audrey.
Audrey smirked teasingly. “Are you sure you’re up for it? We’re going all the way up and back today. Maybe you should just sit on your porch and catch your breath.”
Marielle stood back up and playfully punched Audrey’s shoulder. “You know what, missy? I was hiking this park before you even knew it existed. I know it like the back of my hand. I may be a little out of shape, but I could probably still lose you in those woods. So there!”
Audrey’s smile became warmer and her eyes twinkled. She extended her arm toward the park, inviting Marielle to take the lead. “In that case, we’ll be honored if you join us. Please, be our guide.”
The soft, breathy voice penetrated Marielle to her core. A blush she couldn’t explain spread across her face as she walked in front of Audrey. She felt giddy, eager for the adventure and ignored the nagging voice in the back of her mind that reminded her that she hadn’t gone hiking or done any serious physical activity since she’d given birth to her son.
* * *
Audrey was comfortably leaning her elbows on the rustic log railing at the top of the first long staircase they had to climb. Ralph was off leash, sniffing the ground around her. They were both waiting for Marielle to join them. Audrey was more pleased than she would have expected when Marielle asked to join them on their hike. Even now as she realized her usual fast pace was seriously jeopardized by the other woman’s presence, her heart fluttered at the sight of the figure coming up the stairs. Heat and physical effort had reddened Marielle’s face and filled it with tiny beads of perspiration, giving her a natural glow that made her look even more beautiful. Audrey stood up, took another sip of water from her bottle and offered it to her companion. “Just a few more steps. Come on, you can do it!”
“Ninety-four, ninety-five, ninety-six! Ninety-six freaking steps! Are you trying to kill me?” Marielle didn’t hesitate and took a few large gulps of the fresh water as she tried to catch her breath.
Audrey chuckled. “Look at this though! Now you get to enjoy this!”
Marielle turned her attention to the breathtaking view. The river sparkled in the sun as it snaked through the thick woods at their feet. Soon her breath was back to normal and she smiled. “You’re right. I forgot how beautiful it is.”
“Oh yeah? And here I was thinking you’d guide me through these woods.”
Audrey bumped Marielle’s hip with her own, and Marielle raised her hands in surrender. “Okay, you got me. I confess, it’s been ages since I’ve been here and I’m way, way out of shape. So if you’re afraid I’ll slow you down, I’ll turn around right now. I understand.”
Audrey didn’t stop to disguise her sudden panic. “Oh no, please. It’s not a race. We’ll take our time. Unless you want to go back, of course. I don’t want to force you.”
“No. I’d really like to stay, but I don’t want to slow you down.”
“Stay, please. We’ll take it easy, I promise.”
Marielle seemed reassured, and Audrey sighed with relief. “Okay, that’s settled, then. Just let me take a layer off. It’s way too hot.” She gave the water bottle back to Audrey and pulled off her hooded jacket, leaving only a snug tank top to cover her luscious upper body. Audrey swallowed a lump in her throat as she poured some water into her palm for Ralph to drink. The shirt showed way too much skin, she thought. As Marielle was having a hard time tying the jacket around her waist, Audrey let her gaze wander to the round, freckled shoulders and the inviting collarbone before following a drop of sweat from her long neck down her cleavage. The tank top did little to hide the perfectly round shape of Marielle’s full breasts. Definitely more than a handful, she judged, imagining her own hands trying to hold as much of the soft flesh as possible. Her mouth got dry again and she took another sip of water. When she looked back, Marielle’s eyes were on her and she smiled, wondering if she’d been caught ogling. “Okay, I’m ready.”
“Okay, let’s go, then.”
They walked side by side at a pace that was slow for Audrey but that Marielle seemed to find comfortable. Ralph would disappear into the woods and then come back as if to reassure them he hadn’t forgotten them before disappearing again.
“If I did this more often I’d probably lose weight, right?” Marielle said.
“I really don’t think you need to lose any weight, but if you want to get in better shape, you’re more than welcome to join us anytime.” She smiled at Marielle to assure h
er the invitation was sincere.
Marielle answered with a smile of her own and a gentle squeeze of her forearm. The simple touch of her hand burned Audrey’s skin. “Thank you. I think I will.”
They walked in silence for a while. Audrey wasn’t sure if Marielle was quiet because she was lost in her own thoughts or because she was struggling to walk uphill and climb a few more staircases, but she accepted the silence. When they reached a gazebo on top of a steep hill between the sixth and seventh fall, Audrey suggested they sit for a few minutes so Marielle could catch her breath. They sat down on a bench in the gazebo and shared Audrey’s bottle of water.
When she was able to breathe more easily, Marielle started talking again. “You know, I think my son has a crush on you. All he can talk about is you and your dog.”
They laughed and Audrey answered truthfully, “Well, Ralph and I are very fond of him too.”
They shared another laugh, and then Marielle became serious. “Really, thank you, Audrey. I think this would be much harder on him if he didn’t have you and Ralph. And I know for sure it would be much harder on me. You’re doing more for me than you realize.”
“You’re welcome.” She hesitated for a second but decided now was a good time to ask one of the questions she’d been wondering. “What happened, Marielle? Are you guys really over?” She relaxed when she looked into the dark eyes and didn’t see anger or even reticence.
“I don’t know. Nothing really happened. It hasn’t been good between us for years. I think it was just a matter of time before one of us left.”
“Was there someone else?”
“No. Nothing like that. It’s hard to explain. Nothing bad happened. But nothing good happened either. I wasn’t happy, and obviously he wasn’t happy either.”
“How long were you together?”
“Twelve years.”
Audrey couldn’t hide her shocked expression. “Twelve years? But how old are you?” The question was out before she could stop it. “Oh shit, sorry.”
First Fall Page 6
