by Sky Corgan
“Don't rain on my parade.” I scowled at her.
“I'm sorry. I just don't understand why you want to go to college so far away.”
“There aren't any good video game design colleges around here.”
“Still. Wouldn't it be better and cheaper to just get an associates in art locally and then transfer out.”
“I'd rather not spend my first two years of college learning about stuff I don't give a crap about. Besides, it's not like you can't afford to send me.”
She frowned. “I just don't like the idea of you being so far away. We've never been apart. Aren't you worried about being alone?”
“Oh, come now, Mother. All little birds must leave the nest sometime.”
She laughed and then sighed, “If this is really something you want to do. We'll have to find a cheap apartment for you though, maybe fly up there in a week or two and scout out the area.”
Tammy's phone rang, and I plopped down on the sofa in the living room as she went to answer it. I was just about to turn on the television when I heard her say, “Oh, hi Dom. Long time no talk to.”
It took everything in me not to seem enthusiastic. Even though he never wanted to talk to me, I always looked forward to his phone calls, to hearing about what he had been up to. Five years had passed since I had last seen him, but I always pictured him looking the same, being the same amazing guy. How he wasn't married yet baffled me, but I was secretly happy about it. It was stupid, but there would always be a small part of me that wanted him for myself.
Ever since I became old enough to date, I found myself comparing other guys to him. Were they selfless like him? Were they as handsome as he was? Were they as generous or caring? No one ever stacked up. Maybe that's why I was still single. In a world full of villains and men with cruel intentions, Dominick was the only real prince charming I had ever met. I was convinced that knowing him had ruined me for other men.
“Kim just got accepted to Mesa Community College,” Tammy was telling him. “Oh? I didn't know you had moved. Why'd you move?” She paused, “Really? I don't know, Dom. You've done so much for us already. I wouldn't want to impose any further.” More silence. “Well, it would save money. Marcus and I are trying for a baby right now, you know?” She paused again, “I'll talk to her about it, but I still don't think it's a good idea.”
From that point, the conversation became one-sided with Tammy filling him in on her new promotion and everything that had been going on in our lives. I noticed that she rarely gave Dominick room to talk. He had always been a better listener though, a man of few words.
I turned the television on, pretending to watch a show on Lifetime Movie Network while I waited for her to get off the phone so that I could ask what Dominick had said. Last I heard he had been living in Valencia, California. He seemed to like it there, so I couldn't understand why he would move. Then again, ever since Tammy's wedding, he hadn't stayed in one place for long. This was the fourth time he'd moved in five years, though he had lived in Valencia the longest. I had thought that he was finally settling down somewhere, but I guess not.
Finally, she hung up the phone and came to watch television with me until Marcus got off work. I expected her to start talking the moment she walked in the room, but instead she focused on the television, ignoring me completely.
“Well?” I asked.
“Well what?” She looked at me blankly.
“Well what did Dominick have to say? It's been a while since he called last.”
“Almost six months.”
“I wish he'd call more.” I frowned.
“He's a busy man. I imagine that being a famous author doesn't leave him with much time for idle chitchat with old friends.”
“I suppose. So, what did he have to say?”
“He moved from Valencia.”
“I heard. That's kind of weird. I thought he really liked Valencia.”
“He did, but you know Dom; he doesn't like to stay in one place for too long.”
“Yeah, that's weird too.”
“That's just how he is.” She shrugged.
No. It's not. It's how he became after the wedding, I thought bitterly. If Tammy had never married Marcus, then maybe Dominick would have stayed with us forever. There was no way of knowing now.
“So, where'd he move to this time?” I asked.
She hesitated, “You won't believe it if I told you.”
For a moment, I was filled with excitement. He came back. He came back, which means I'll get to see him again. He came back, and I'm leaving. That thought caused a fissure in my heart. Maybe I would go to a local community college after all. If he had come back, then I didn't want to run off to another state.
“He moved back here, didn't he?” I said finally.
“No.” She shook her head. “He's living in Mesa, Arizona right now.”
My breath caught in my throat. He's living in Mesa.
“That's awesome. That means when I move to Mesa, you won't have to worry about me being alone.” I did my best to contain my enthusiasm.
“Yeah,” she sighed.
“What's wrong? You don't sound happy.”
“It's not that I'm unhappy. I'm glad there will be someone there that you know and will look after you.”
“Then why did you sigh?”
“I don't know if I should tell you or not.”
Here comes the bomb. He got married, didn't he? Or he had a kid? Or he's married and has a kid? Part of me didn't want to know. My heart was already slowly breaking inside at the thought, though I kept trying to tell myself that it didn't matter. Dominick, above all people, deserved to be happy. I should be elated for him if the news was so good.
“You can't say that and then not tell me.” I hid the disappointment from my voice.
“Well, I told him that you got accepted at Mesa Community College, and he asked if you would want to come move in with him, since he lives close to the college. He figured it would save me money, and he says he has plenty of room.”
I think I stopped breathing when she told me that. Dominick offered for me to move in with him? It was like a dream come true, better than just getting to see him. This was the closeness to him that I had always wanted, wasn't it?
“I don't really like the idea,” Tammy continued. “I mean, I know he'll take care of you, but I know he works from home, and I don't want you to be a burden to him.”
“I wouldn't be,” I said quickly. “I could cook for him and clean for him. I would pay my way. It's not like I would just be mooching.”
She gave me a quizzical look. “You'd actually want to live with him?”
“Yeah. I mean, if he's offering. Just think about it. It would save you so much money. And if I took care of his house, then it would benefit him too. It would be a win/win situation for all.”
“I guess. I'm just thinking about you, really. I mean, don't you want your own place to hang out with friends and bring boys back to. I don't know if Dominick would allow that. He's a very private person.”
“I'm going to Mesa to go to college, not to make friends or pick up boys,” I told her, though I'd honestly never factored any of that in. Tammy was right; I probably wouldn't be able to have friends over if I stayed with Dominick, but at least I could go out if I wanted to.
“Take a night to think about this, okay? I know it sounds like a good idea now, but he's not the same person he was before.”
“Sure he is. Dom would never change.” I frowned at how little she seemed to think of him. He had always been the same steady stable caring Dominick. She was the one who had changed. She had become selfish, casting him aside for Marcus after everything he had done for her. The resentment bit into me, but I tried to hold it back.
“Just think about it, alright? You don't have to decide tonight.”
“I know.”
“Take the week, and if you still want to move in with him, I'll call him back, and we'll set everything up.”
“Alright.”
I didn't change my mind. The rest of the week, my thoughts were consumed with seeing Dominick again. Was he still as handsome as I remembered? I tried to think about how Tammy and Marcus had changed over the last five years and use it as a comparison. They were both a lot more mature looking. Tammy had gained a small bit of weight. Marcus's shoulders had gotten broader. They were both just older versions of themselves. Then again, so was I. Would Dominick even recognize me anymore?
The weekend came around, and I had my answer. I wanted to live with Dominick, wanted to return some of his kindness by caring for him as he had cared for us. There was no way I could ever repay him, but I would try.
When I told Tammy my decision, she sighed and reluctantly agreed. I listened as she called Dominick and talked to him about the arrangement. Everything seemed to go smoothly, though Tammy sounded apprehensive throughout the entire conversation. It didn't matter to me though. This was my life, not hers. He had made the offer, and I was going to take it.
In the weeks that followed, I brushed up on my domestic skills, offering to take over all the cooking and cleaning until it was time for me to leave for Mesa. By the time I got there, I wanted to be perfect—perfect for him. I even tried to remember what his favorite dishes were and practiced cooking them. As they say, the way to a man's heart is through his stomach.
The reality of the situation didn't really sink in until the day we left for the airport. Even as we loaded up our bags in the car that morning, my stomach twisted like a nest of angry snakes, striking out at my insides with what ifs. What if this was a mistake? What if I was a burden to Dominick? What if I annoyed him? What if I just got in the way?
It was too late to turn back though. I had made my decision, and I would have to see it through for better or worse. Of course, if things got too bad, I was sure I could call Tammy, and she would find some way to make things alright. There was no point in worrying about it now. I knew that, but my brain was on overdrive.
Tammy flew with me to help soothe my nerves. It was the first time I had been in a plane since before our parents had died, and I wasn't quite sure what to expect. There was a little turbulence, but for the most part, it was a pleasant flight. I remember looking out the window and thinking about how I was leaving my old life behind. I was leaving Virginia as a little girl. I would be arriving in Arizona as a woman.
Tammy told me that Dominick wouldn't be waiting for us at the terminal. He had turned into somewhat of a hermit and didn't like being in public. Instead, we would meet him at the passenger pickup area outside of the airport.
Once we got off the plane, the snakes in my stomach really became active, twisting themselves to the point of nauseous pain. I couldn't believe that it would only be minutes before Dominick and I were reunited. Five years was such a long time. I was both happy and scared, excited and dreading it. Part of me wondered if I'd still have feeling for him at all. What if I saw him and there was nothing there? Did it even matter? College, Kim. You're here for college. Remember that. Seeing Dominick is just a bonus.
We collected my suitcases from baggage and then headed toward the passenger pickup area. Tammy seemed equally nervous as we approached the large automatic sliding doors that led outside. She was biting her bottom lip, scanning ahead to see if she could locate Dominick.
A sign with my name on it caught our attention first. Kim Naramore, it said. The man holding it was far too old and short to be Dominick. He had white hair and weathered skin, looking to be somewhere in his mid to late sixties. Tammy pointed to him as if I couldn't see the sign, and we approached with smiles on our faces.
“Are you Kim?” the man asked with genuine kindness in his voice.
“Yes, sir. We're the Naramores,” Tammy replied.
“This way, please.” He turned and led us toward the line of cars and limousines that were waiting for other passengers.
I felt embarrassed when Tammy spotted Dominick first. “Oh my God,” she said, her face lighting up like a Christmas tree. Then she jogged ahead of me, setting down one of my suitcases and practically leaping into the arms of a man I never would have recognized from afar.
It took a few more steps before I began to believe what I was seeing. This was not the man I remembered. Where were the jeans and T-shirts he always wore? The unkempt hair? The five o'clock shadow? It had been replaced by a business suit, perfectly styled hair, and sunglasses so dark that you wouldn't be able to see his eyes unless you were right up on him. The man whom Tammy was hugging was a complete stranger to me, I realized with despair.
“You look so different,” she was telling him when I finally approached.
“I try to be better kept these days.” Even his voice sounded different, harder, less friendly. Perhaps that was because he was nervous. I couldn't really tell. “And is this your sister?” He turned to me.
“Hi Dom,” I greeted him nervously.
“It is. Kimlet. How you've grown.” He smiled, but it didn't feel genuine.
Kimlet. When I was little, I had a Piglet doll from the show Winnie the Pooh that I carried around everywhere. Dominick used to tease me about it, and eventually started calling me Kimlet. At the time, the pet name delighted me, but as I grew older, I began to hate it. It was a cruel remember that he still thought of me as a little girl. I wasn't little anymore though. Surely, he could see that now.
“Well, as much as I'd love to stick around, my flight back will be leaving soon,” Tammy said. “I just wanted to come and see Kim off, make sure that she got to you safely.”
Dominick nodded respectfully. “I understand. Shall we?” He looked down at me.
The man who had been holding up the sign went to take my bags and throw them in the back of the limo. Tammy hugged Dominick a final time, telling him how much she appreciated this and that if I was any bother to him that he should call her, then she hugged me, telling me pretty much the same thing about him.
“I'll be fine,” I growled in annoyance, embarrassed by how motherly she was acting. “You don't need to treat me like a baby. I have my cell phone. If anything goes wrong I'll call you.”
“Alright. No need to get so defensive.” She gave me a serious look, and I instantly felt guilty for acting like such a bitch.
“I love you, and I'll miss you.” I hugged her tightly, trying my best to make up for it. “I promise I'll call you every night.”
“You better, little sis. I'll miss you too. Remember that if you need anything, anything at all, don't hesitate to call.”
“I won't.”
She released me from the embrace, and as I watched her walk away I had never felt more alone. It was like I had been delivered to a stranger, and I would have to make the best of it.
Dominick placed a hand on my back, startling me. “Are you ready to go?” he asked.
“Mhm.” I nodded, glancing at Tammy's back for a final time as she walked through the double doors, leaving me behind.
We climbed into the limousine, and I looked around in wonder. Dominick grinned when he crawled in behind me, sitting on the opposite side. The thing was spacious enough that we could put a good amount of distance between us, and he did, perhaps feeling as nervous and awkward as I was.
“You've never been in one of these before, have you?”
“No.”
“I don't usually take limousines, but it's easier to get in and out of the airport with one.”
“Oh.”
The limo pulled away from the airport, driving us toward Dominick's home.
“How was your flight?”
“It was alright.”
“I'm not a fan of flying, though I do it more than I like these days.”
“I liked watching the buildings and people get smaller when we took off for the airport. I don't remember ever seeing anything like it.”
He smirked. “You've grown.”
“I have.” I tried not to blush, wondering what he thought of me.
Dominick was still handsome, though he was a di
fferent kind of handsome than he had been before. Like Marcus, his shoulders had gotten broader. He had lost most of his boyish looks and was now all man. Instead of being a bit messy, as I remembered him, he seemed refined. An upgrade of the Dominick Parker I used to know.
“You look so much like your mother,” he said
“I don't remember much about my mother.”
“I didn't think you would. You were very young when she passed away. But she had the same hair as yours, brown and curly.”
“I wish I would have gotten Tammy's hair. I hate how unmanageable my hair is.” I tugged at a strand. Somehow, my mother had learned how to control her hair. In all the pictures that I'd seen of her, it looked nice and soft. Mine was a frizzy mess most days.
“I think it looks nice.” He smiled, but I couldn't tell if it was genuine or not.
“Thanks. I hear you're a big time author now.”
“I am. If you asked me ten years ago if I saw my life going this way, I would have definitely told you no.”
“How did you think your life was going to turn out?”
“Different.” The word sounded short, and I knew he didn't want to talk about it. I had a pretty good idea of how he wished it would have turned out, with him marrying my sister. The thought made me sad.
The rest of our journey was fraught with silence. Thankfully, the drive was short.
Since Dominick was rich now, I expected us to pull up in front of a mansion. Instead, we drove into what appeared to be a luxury apartment complex. The car lurched to a stop in front of a building at the back of the complex, and Dominick and I waited for the driver to open the door before we climbed out of the limo.
“Home sweet home,” Dominick said as the driver went to retrieve my bags.
“You live in an apartment complex?” I asked.
“No. It's a condo.”
I felt underwhelmed but tried not to show it. Why it bothered me that he didn't live in a house, I don't know. If he hadn't offered to take me in, I would have ended up in an apartment anyway.
Dominick picked up my suitcases and carried them to the door of his condo. He pulled out a key and opened it up before going inside. I followed him through the living room into one of the bedrooms.
