When she broke the surface again, she realized there were rocks under her feet. She was relieved to feel Leif’s hands guide her head out of the water. His whispered voice was barely audible. “We are just out of sight of Rúni. Stay low in the water and continue along this channel to its end, and get out under cover of the rocks. Do you remember how to get to your camp?”
Eilish nodded and muttered, “Follow the coast north and east to our beach.”
“I will meet you there. I must first await my uncle on the landing shore to hear his story.”
Leif stared at her mouth. She thought he might kiss her until he began to lower himself in the water. Unwilling to let him go, Eilish grabbed his face between her hands and pressed her lips to his. Her throat closed, and she tried to keep herself from weeping. “Thank you.”
Leif’s green eyes focused on her. He returned a slow kiss, tugging on her lower lip. When he pulled away, she saw sadness etched on his face. He turned, and his naked body cut through the water. Ripples twisted his pale shape until he completely disappeared from view. She tried to find him again, but only saw the swells left in his wake.
A narrow furrow led away from the open loch, and few bushes lined the rocky slopes that surrounded her. The skiff must have been just out of sight beyond an outcropping, but she was careful not to look. Eilish lowered herself in the water and half waded, half swam farther along the channel until she reached the rocks Leif had referred to.
When she lifted herself out of the loch, her water-laden brat pressed heavily on her shoulders. A shower of cold seawater flooded down her clothed body. She let herself drain off before climbing onto the rocky bank. A burst of wind brought chills to her skin, and her lips began to quiver.
Eilish glanced over her shoulder, scanning the horizon for any sign of movement, finding none. Leif had provided the perfect getaway route. She said a prayer in thanks for sending her handsome angel to her and hurried over the grassy slopes north to her camp.
Leif sat by the hearth. The moisture in his hair dried by the time he’d finished his warmed milk. He rolled the empty wooden cup between his fingers, wondering how much longer it would take Rúni to get back. He’d watched his uncle from a distant shore after leaving Eilish’s side. Rúni had craned his neck, staring into the dark waters for a short time before rowing to another cove and pulling out his fishing line again.
The entrance chamber filled with light as the front door opened. Leif glanced over and let out a breath in relief. His wait was over.
“I have never met”—his uncle spotted him and boomed—“such an ill-suited woman for the sea.”
“What?” Leif asked with a cough as he let Màiri take his empty cup. His insides twisted, and he felt sick. They both stared at Rúni in confusion, which only put a grin on the older man’s face.
Rúni strolled farther into the room with his fingers hooked through the mouths of two trout. He leaned over to slap them down on the hearthstones. “I know why you liked her so much. Did she let you bend her over and have your way with her?”
“I do not know what you speak of,” Leif responded, trying to hide his anger. His surprise was true, for he hadn’t expected his uncle to come back telling tales such as this. His view from beneath the boat hadn’t allowed him to see what had occurred prior to Eilish splashing into the loch. It made him wonder how Rúni had discovered her secret. Maybe it had been a mistake to send her out in a boat with him after all.
“She was no man—I checked. Grabbed a handful of trousers and nothing more.” His uncle paused, clearly enjoying everyone’s rapt attention. “It is unfortunate your pet thrall is following the stream all the way to Ægir himself, otherwise we might have had some fun with her before your father’s return.”
Leif frowned at his uncle and asked seriously, “Is he dead?”
“She.” Rúni chortled in response. “I did not a thing. The thrall leapt up as if I had made a threat on her life, and she dropped like a stone in the water. Really, I have not seen a thing like it before. Was a funny sight that will keep me laughing for days. I cannot wait to tell my brother.”
“You did not think her worth saving?” Leif asked, trying not to get too angry. She was supposed to go overboard and appear to drown, yet he still hated the thought of any man relishing her death.
Rúni just laughed in response. Leif glanced at his uncle and noticed a red mark on his cheek, which nearly brought a smile to his lips. Instead, he asked, “What is that on your face?”
Rúni frowned and touched his check. He stumbled to answer. “The fish gave such a fight, it slapped me as I brought it on board.”
“It appears to be as strong as a Gael,” Leif shot back. He enjoyed the agitation he created, watching his uncle’s eyes narrow in fury. He sighed and said, “That makes one thrall lost to Ægir before father’s return. He will be unhappy to have missed it.”
“Oh, I will give him all the details.” Rúni sneered back at him. “No one tells a tale as well as I.”
Leif started for the door and muttered only to himself, “That is what I am counting on.”
He walked beyond their barley and oat crops rustling in the sea breeze. Narrow, sun-bleached wood fencing protected their harvest from the sheep that milled across the grassy hills. They bleated and cried out to each other, hurrying away from him as he rushed past. Leif slipped north and out of sight of his father’s farm. The fastest way to get to Eilish’s beachside camp was to fly. He wanted to confirm she was safe and return home by nightfall so Rúni wouldn’t grow suspicious.
He stripped off his clothing, belt and sword, stowing everything beside a rocky mound, and cleared his mind of all concerns but the body of the great albatross. In moments he was snapping his beak and opening his wings wide into the breeze. It took little effort to lift into the cloudy skies and rise above the land.
The perspective from above was different from below. The world was so simple and small. His eyes swept over the dunes and bluffs for any sign of movement, finding only sheep grazing in the grass. The trip was short, for it was quickly traversed as a seabird.
Leif spotted the black towers of rock in the bay. He traced his eyes up from the beach in search of her peaked tent. Though its shade blended in with the sandy slope, he found it easily from above, its fabric flapping in the breeze. He coasted down on the air currents and landed beside it. Eager to find whether she was there, he returned to his human shape.
The cold winds did not bother him, but they still raised goose pimples on his exposed skin. Leif walked around the tent and squatted down to peer into its opening, where the sharp end of an axe stopped a hand’s distance from his nose. He breathed out. “It is only me—you are safe!”
Eilish lowered the blade with wide eyes and sighed loudly. She set the weapon aside and rubbed her forehead. “You startled me. I did not hear you approach.”
“That is because I flew,” he answered. “My uncle thinks you drowned just as we hoped. Aiden is no more.”
The corners of her lips began to lift into a grin. “I would not have thought I could rejoice my own passing.”
She seemed to notice his lack of clothing and unfastened her brat from her shoulders and handed it to him. He wrapped the dark woolen square around his waist and entered the tent. She moved aside to make room on the furs they’d laid on the ground.
“You are free, Eilish,” he said. He wanted to say her name. He liked how it rolled off his tongue. And he would not be able to address her for much longer. She would soon leave.
“All because of you.” She brushed her hair from her face, tucking it behind her ear. Without it in the way of her blue eyes, she settled her gaze on him. “Thank you for your kindness.”
He remembered his moment of weakness when they fell upon the hills together, and he longed to touch her again. But it was foolish for him to want her. There was no place where they could live happily together, and sending her off to find her father was the best choice. Leif fidgeted with an edge of the woolen fabr
ic fastened about his waist. He tried to distract himself from his own thoughts by saying, “Ragna will arrive home any time, and with him comes Agnar. I will send him to you as soon as I can manage, then he may take you east of Austmarr to help you search for your father.”
“But what of you?” she asked with a frown. “How can I leave you?”
After a long pause, he said, “I will do what I can to make things right. I cannot leave with you or I’ll put you in danger, but I will not allow you to stay just to see you abused before my eyes.”
Eilish’s voice surprised him. Her jaw was set and her tone filled with anger. “What about making things right for you?”
“The Norns of Fate wove the tapestry of my life before I was born. I see nothing about my happiness, only my father’s endless quest, and he will not let me free. Why can you not be satisfied with your own freedom? I am.”
“Because—” She rose onto her knees and leaned closer to him. “The way you look after others runs through me, too. And I care about your future as well.”
Having her so close to him was distracting. He wanted to hold her and taste her lips, but that would only complicate things. He needed to remain detached. He needed to be able to let her go when it was time. “At least you can live to tend to the infirm. You can make a life for yourself.”
“But I want a life with you,” she whispered, her lower lip trembling.
Her words stung. More than anything, he wanted to be with her. With Aiden’s fabricated death, Eilish’s true identity could take root again. She was a beautiful Gaelic healer in a world where available women were few and far between.
Eilish’s soft fingers touched the side of his face, and it took all of his strength to pull away. “It is not possible. My father will never let me go. If I left, he would find me and destroy everything I love—he would kill you.”
He looked out of the opening of the tent, trying to avoid her stare. He felt her eyes on him, and he worried that if he got caught in her gaze, his resolve could crumble.
Eilish replayed his words in her head. She was certain he had just admitted his feelings for her, which only made her dig in her heels. Her stubbornness reared its head. She never would have imagined a life beside a Finn-Gall before the raid. After all, they were barbarians who only cared about stealing, raping and pillaging. At least, that was what she’d always been told. Ragna and his kinfolk closely resembled that description, but she’d discovered that not all men from the north shared the same principles, just like the men from Éire.
She hadn’t planned any of this. She couldn’t hide her feelings for Leif any longer. How could she not care for him? He’d put her safety above anything else, even his own blood. Now she couldn’t imagine herself without him by her side. She didn’t want to.
Eilish was unafraid. She moved closer to him and said, “You did not rest until you thought of a way to set me free. How can I leave your side when your father treats you as his slave? I want you to know freedom, too.”
He winced, and she knew her words had cut his pride. Leif leveled a stare at her that turned her stomach. She wanted to push him to react. She wanted him to care about his own fate, not just Agnar’s and her own.
She took a deep breath and thrust her forearm against his chest, sending him onto his back. His look of surprise gave her momentary enjoyment. She dropped onto her hands and knees and climbed over him, her face hovering a breath away from his. Eilish whispered against his lips, “You give me courage.”
His eyebrows pulled together as he stared up at her. He grabbed the back of her head, pulling her mouth to his. His lips were desperate, leaving them both panting for air. Leif lifted up to string a trail of kisses down her neck to the opening of her tunic. She pulled away, tugging her clothing over her head, and dropped the linen into a pile on the furs.
Leif’s hands pulled at the strips of fabric that wrapped her chest, and he growled in frustration. She laughed in response and raised her eyebrow. Eilish found the tucked-in end and slowly unwound the cloth from her torso. When it began to loosen, he pulled it down, freeing her breasts from their binding. He sat up to press his eager lips against them while his hands grasped at her back.
His green-lidded eyes gazed up at her as he panted for breath. His warm hands drifted down to cup her buttocks, and he moaned in frustration, “This is why women do not wear leggings.”
Eilish giggled just as he cast her sideways onto her back to claw at the waist of her trousers. As soon as she was free from her clothing, he crawled up her body, tracing his lips up to her awaiting mouth. Happy amusement was gone. In its place, a deep hunger. She feared he would never be hers again like he was in that moment.
She tore the covering from his waist and felt his excitement. He seemed to hesitate, but she wouldn’t have it. Eilish opened up to him and pulled him to her. A rush of sensation coursed through her, except there was no tenderness now. She felt his every move, his every thrust.
Her euphoria peaked as he pressed himself to her, his breath on her neck and his groans in her ear. She clung to his neck, lifting her abdomen. His hands grasped her hips and held her tight. A burst of pleasure rushed through her body, and she gasped for air. He drove himself in her one last time before pausing and easing his full weight down.
Leif caressed the hair from her face to stare into her eyes. After catching his breath, he reached for her hand and held it to his chest. She felt his body pulsing with energy. “You will always be here. In my hjarta forever.”
It sounded like he was saying goodbye, and she didn’t like it. She’d done everything she could think of to try to convince him to come away with her. Her reaction surprised her. Tears began to spill from her eyes, and her lip trembled as she spoke. “I do not need to be in your heart, for I will be by your side.”
“If you feel as I do, you will not stay. If you love me”—he placed a reluctant kiss on her lips and shook his head—“you will do as I plead. I wish to know you are alive and free. I want age to take you, not the tip of my father’s sword.”
“I would give my life for you to know freedom,” she cried in anger, pressing her hand against his chest.
Leif moved away from her and faced out of the tent. Eilish lay in the silky furs as she tried to tamp the flow of her tears. She stared at his smooth back against the watery horizon outside. Powerless against her fate, she fought against it still. She crawled to wrap her arms around him, nuzzling her nose against his neck and felt goose pimples raise on his skin.
“Neinn,” he whispered through his clenched jaw.
She lifted her head in confusion. Leif pointed in the distance to a small red square floating on the sea.
“My father comes,” he said. His face had lost all trace of emotion. His words were filled with steely determination. “I cannot see you again. It would not be wise to lead my father to you. Look out for Agnar as he will do for you—I will send him when I can. Be safe and keep yourself alive, if not for yourself, then for me.”
He stood up, breaking free from her arms.
“Wait,” she called, not wanting him to leave. There was more she wished to say.
“I will not bid fárvel,” Leif said over his shoulder. “True love does not corrode. It will stand the test of time.”
With that, he raised his muscular arms and a wave of pale feathers coursed over his body. He shrank down to the sand, standing on narrow legs, and opened his wings to the breeze. As he lifted into the sky, she found her voice. “My love will not corrode!”
Chapter 13
Leif awaited his father’s return on the landing beach. From the moment he’d seen the red sail on the ocean, the emotions that Eilish had kindled inside of him had gone silent. He shut himself away from them as protection. If he showed any glimmer of happiness, Ragna would be sure to stamp it out, and Leif was determined to keep the unseen treasure she’d given him hidden away. But he could not think of her in that moment, or he might grow mad. He only thought of what his sacrifice would bring the p
eople he cared for.
Heavy footsteps stopped beside him on the shore. A group of thralls had followed Rúni to the clearing. His uncle clapped his hands together and muttered, “I cannot wait to divvy up the wealth.”
Leif nodded numbly and watched the trade ship float across the channel through the loch. He squinted at the men lining the decks, searching for his friend’s face. When he found his dark hair and hand held up in greeting, Leif waved back, relieved to see Agnar safe.
At the stern, gripping the side rudder, was Ragna. His chest lifted in pride as he struck a pose that reeked of arrogance. “Your jarl has returned with loot of the gods!”
“You are good to us, Brother,” Rúni called back with a hoot.
They waded out into the shallows to help guide the boat ashore. Ragna was the first one off. He was all smiles, enjoying the words of praise from his crew and kinsmen. When his gaze fell on Leif, he sneered, “Frowning as usual. Where are your words of thanks for delivering silver to your hands? Thankless child.”
Instead of saying anything he would regret, he turned to help unload the ship. The cargo they’d loaded it with had been sold in Duiblinn for scraps of valuable silver and gold, or coins from other lands, though there were half-filled caskets of water and food.
Agnar splashed into the cool water beside him, and they clasped forearms in greeting. His friend uttered, “Happy and healthy.”
Leif returned the welcome, avoiding eye contact. Agnar knew him better than anyone and would sense he was upset. Leif didn’t want any attention fresh on the heels of leaving Eilish’s side for the last time. He tried to make light conversation, asking questions about their stay in Duiblinn. His friend was quick to answer, consuming their return to the farm with talk of the fights Leif’s cousins, Sten and Oddmund, had gotten into and survived.
The rocky meadow that cradled their farm was alight with excitement upon their master’s return. Ragna ordered a calf to be slaughtered, starting the weeklong celebration he was so fond of. Smells of fresh meat cooking in the hearth made hearts light. Horns and cups filled with mead helped.
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