Cirque
Page 17
“We have to kill it,” Gloriana said. Her brown eyes met Nikki’s, glowing in the light of sunset. “It almost got your boat, you know. You’re lucky to be alive.”
Nikki shook her head. “I don’t think it was trying to hurt us. It was just … like he said, it’s confused; it was grabbing out at anything. It’s frightened.”
The flier banked to the right and descended; below them Nikki saw the grey strip of the northern Guard field. A flag flew calmly over the Guard building, its blue and green bands stirring in an evening breeze. Nikki suddenly began to feel cold; she shivered and rubbed her arms. She wished Three hadn’t left her shawl at the Winter Gate.
“A frightened animal is the most dangerous of all,” Gloriana said. “There’s no telling what it might do.”
“But don’t you see?” said Nikki. “We should be trying to help it, not kill it. If it’s in trouble, of course it might hurt something. That doesn’t mean it’s evil.”
Gloriana turned in her seat to look disbelievingly at Nikki. “After what happened on the river, you can say that?”
Nikki forced herself to meet Gloriana’s eyes. She was so strong, this woman; would Nikki herself ever have such strength? “But it’s so beautiful—didn’t you see it? Like a great tiger, all muscle and grace. We don’t kill tigers, do we?”
“We don’t let them loose in the city either,” Gloriana said, turning away from Nikki as the flier descended toward the landing strip in front of the Guard building. The engines roared briefly as they braked in the air; then Nikki felt the wheels touch ground, and the flier settled. Gloriana released her gravity harness and opened her door as the motors whined down to stillness; she sprang to the runway with a lithe movement.
Nikki clambered heavily out of the flier, gasping as she jumped to the ground. The evening air had taken on a crisp coolness that seemed to emphasize the wide spaces of the Guard field. Her long blonde hair stirring in the breeze, she reached up to catch Robin as she dropped from the flier.
Robin was still talking excitedly with the millipede. “You mean there are more of those things? Come on, you don’t have to hide stuff from me—tell me what’s going to happen. I’m not scared anymore.”
The millipede waved away Nikki’s proffered hand with two of its forefeet and flowed out over the edge of the flier’s door, lowering itself headfirst to the ground while its hind feet clung to the sides of the door. It alighted smoothly, then raised its body to walk upright beside Nikki and Robin. Gloriana and the pilot had gone ahead toward the Guard Building.
“You must understand,” the millipede said, “that I prefer not to talk about things that have not yet happened. As you said earlier, your race experiences events more sharply than do those of us who foresee them. Let us enjoy what is to come as fully as we can.”
“Listen, if there are going to be more of those things, I wouldn’t mind if they didn’t surprise me,” Robin said.
Nikki’s attention was suddenly caught by the sight of a tall figure dressed in a loose green body-suit waiting by the door of the Guard building. It was Jordan, and as she looked he met Gloriana and the pilot and began to talk anxiously with them. The pilot brushed by him and went inside; Gloriana gestured toward Nikki and her companions as she answered Jordan.
Nikki was surprised at the way her pulse raced at sight of Jordan; she’d forgotten him in the excitement of the afternoon, but seeing him again brought back the memory of the warmth she had felt from him when they’d met in the cart. He was comforting and accepting in a way that Gregorian had never been.
Even when I was Three, he never really got mad at me, she thought. He just ignored my insults and kept treating me like a human being. Maybe it’s because he’s used to handling children—I’m sure juvenile when Three is out!
Jordan broke away from Gloriana and hurried out to meet them. At the last minute Robin saw him coming and ran forward to throw herself into his arms. “Jordan! What are you doing here?”
“I saw a broadcast,” he said, hugging her tightly. “You were on that boat, and one of the creatures from the Abyss attacked—”
“Oh, it’s okay, Jordan,” Robin said, giggling as he put her down. “I just used a whole lot of negatives, and it went away. I’m all right; see?” She twirled around in front of him, arms outstretched.
He smiled, obviously relieved. “I had to be sure. After Nikki lured you away …” He met Nikki’s eyes, and she was startled by his concern. “Well, I see you’re okay too. Here; I brought along your shawl—you left it at the Winter Gate.”
She smiled gratefully as she took the shawl, feeling awkward and unsure of herself. But just a little while ago, when the creature was attacking their boat, she’d been calm, even elated. Where was her sureness now?
The wind stirred in the open landing field, whipping her hair in front of her face; she brushed it away, feeling giddy. Sounds and sights, even the cold that had cut through her a moment ago, suddenly seemed distant and faint.
“We’ve had an eventful day,” she said in an attempt at nonchalance. “Didn’t I tell you Robin would learn a lot today?”
“I did, too!” Robin said. “Jordan, did you know humans are practically the only people in the galaxy who can’t see the future? That’s why the millipede came here in the first place—it knew what was going to happen today!”
Jordan glanced at the millipede, which stood silently, its large eyes closed, the fur of its face stirring lightly as it tasted the evening winds. “I guess that kind of puts us at a disadvantage out in the stars, if everyone else knows in advance what’s going to happen,” Jordan said.
“It is more complex than that,” said the millipede, smiling slightly, eyes still closed. “Your race has very sophisticated thought patterns that assume the results of actions before you see them.”
“Humans invented causality,” Robin said proudly.
The millipede’s smile broadened. “That is a good way of saying it.”
The four of them were walking together toward the Guard building, a low structure of weathered pine and redwood with a large bas-relief carved across its face. Nikki recognized the figures of famous civic leaders of the past in the carvings: Sean Hassad, who had codified Cirque’s laws centuries ago; Maria the Great, who had held the positions of monitor and Guardian at the same time; Pavel Borkin, the architect of early Cirque. This Guard building was the oldest civic structure of Cirque, built in the days when there had been nothing but a small trading town on the North Edge of the Abyss.
“It must be useful to be able to see the future, though,” said Jordan. “Especially for anyone in your company, Nikki—I’d be able to know in advance just when you were going to change into another personality.”
“The millipede knew that too!” Robin said. “It was just waiting for Nikki to change to …” The girl hesitated. “What number are you now, Nikki?”
“Four,” Nikki said softly. She was distracted by a curious sense of unreality; her feet hardly seemed to reach to the ground, she seemed to float through the entrance of the Guard building. Amorphous visions drifted in the dimness of the interior. “But I think I’m going to …”
Her sight cleared gradually; she was able to make out the figures of Jordan and Robin and the millipede near her and Guard officers conferring with Gloriana at a great table in one corner of the large room. Their voices came to her softly and clearly; yet at the same time she heard a vast silence, as if a multitude of people standing behind her had stopped talking all at once.
“Going to what?” asked Jordan, watching her sharply.
Nikki straightened up and drew a deep breath; the air in here tasted warm, the low ceiling holding the heat of the day. “It’s happened,” she said. “I’ve changed again.”
Robin’s eyes opened wide, staring at her. “Wow! Who are you now?”
“Nobody,” said Nikki. “I mean, nobody new. I’m me, Nikki. It’s over.”
“What is?” asked the girl. She looked anxiously at Nikki.
Robin continued to stare at her for a moment. “Well, at least you didn’t faint this time,” she said.
The millipede moved around in front of Nikki and looked deeply into her eyes; the great softness of its gaze was like a peaceful ocean. “I feel joy to meet you at last,” the foreigner said.
Nikki looked into the millipede’s great dark eyes, then reached out and ruffled the fur of its face. “And I’m glad to be out, all of me, so I can meet you.”
Robin was frowning. “Does this mean you’re not going to be happy like you were this afternoon?” she asked. “I really did like you that way, you know.”
“Oh yes, I’m happy,” Nikki said, taking the girl by the shoulders and hugging her quickly. “All those people I was earlier were parts of me, you know.” She turned to Jordan, who was watching her quietly. “You asked me earlier what sort of person could hold all those others. Well, here I am; this is me.”
Did he smile? If he didn’t, he gave the impression of it. Jordan held out his hand and said, “I’m glad to meet you too, Nikki. At last.”
“Yes,” she said. “At last.” They stood looking at each other silently, hands clasped together. Nikki thought: He seems just the way he did before, when I was Two. And when I was Three. He never changed, no matter how much I did. It’s as though he was just waiting for me to come out. The millipede knew what I’d be like later, but Jordan just waited for me, even when I was so awful to him.
“Jordan, you said this morning that you took one of those capsules once. Tell me about it,” she said.
He laughed. “Oh, it was very interesting, even though not much happened. For a while I thought it hadn’t worked. I waited over an hour for the changes to come on, but finally I gave up and just decided to go to a museum. You know the one up near the First Cataract, where they have all the old plastic sculpture in vacuum cases? I cart-hopped up there and spent a while in the museum. Then all of a sudden I lost interest, and I went to a playground by the river. I went on the slides and the degrav rides; it was like being a kid again. Then I remembered that there was a karate jai alai court nearby, so I went there and played three games. I hadn’t done it in years, and I was out of practice; I almost got a rib broken.”
“By that time you must have noticed that the changes were working,” Nikki said.
“That was the funny thing: I didn’t feel any different at all, I just got interested in things I didn’t do very often. After the games, I went down by the river and sat for an hour watching the Cataract.”
“You never got all depressed and mean like Nikki did today?” Robin asked.
“No. But I didn’t feel elated either, which usually happens to people who take those capsules. It was very subtle.”
“Wow, are you stable!” Robin said, staring in wonder at Jordan.
He laughed again. “That’s a nice way of looking at it. But you’re supposed to be practicing negatives today, remember?”
Robin narrowed her eyes. “Wow, are you boring!” she said.
The conference among the Guard officers finished, and Gloriana came over to them. She addressed the millipede: “I’m sorry your ride through the city ended up the way it did. I hope you won’t think we set monsters on all our visitors.”
“Certainly not,” the millipede said. “I am aware that this day is unique in your history.”
Gloriana’s mouth was set in a firm line. “We intend to see that it remains unique. By tomorrow we’ll have received enough life-control chemicals from our outstations to make sure we wipe out the last of those things.” She turned to Jordan and Nikki. “Is either of you a follower of the Five Elements?”
Nikki shook her head. She felt confused about Gloriana’s determination to kill the creatures in the Abyss. How could anyone hate them so much?
“I’m not a member of any particular temple,” Jordan said. “But I’ve been to services at the Cathedral of the Five Elements a couple of times. It’s a beautiful old building.”
“What sort of services do they hold?” Gloriana asked. “The priestess, Salamander—what’s she like?”
Jordan said, “She’s very dramatic. She wears a white cape, and her hair is the color of fire. When she stands in front of the flames, she almost seems to merge with them.”
“But what does she do?” Gloriana said. “She’s holding an open service tonight, you see, and if there should be any trouble—” She shook her head, a quick movement that made her short dark hair bounce. “You know from the broadcast today that she thinks that creature is some kind of bogeyman. If she panics the crowd tonight, and it gets broadcast …”
“Well, tell the monitor not to broadcast anything like that,” Robin said.
“Nobody tells the monitor what to do,” Gloriana said. “Nobody tells priestesses what to do either. My job is to keep Cirque safe, but I have no control over the two most important offices in Cirque. Most of the time that doesn’t matter—most of the time I have nothing to do. But when I do have to do something, I don’t have enough power.”
Power, thought Nikki. Control. No wonder she wants to kill wild things.
“Look, couldn’t you just capture the creature?” Nikki asked. “Put it in a preserve, the same as you’d do with a tiger.”
Gloriana sighed wearily, and for a fleeting moment Nikki saw the human being under the facade: Gloriana was small and willowy, not at all strong physically. “We’ve discussed that, and we’ll do it if we can. I’m going to have Guard officers patrolling the entire Final Cataract area tonight with nerve guns. But if the Beast—that creature—attacks any of the villas, they’ll have to kill it. And if it should break into the Cathedral where a priestess is stirring up a crowd of religious fanatics, a lot of people could be hurt.”
“The followers of the Five Elements aren’t fanatics,” said Jordan. “Their whole creed is built around spiritual peace.”
Gloriana gave a short, wry laugh. “Peace. That’s wonderful, but what good is it when some monster starts strangling you? Besides, I saw what the priestess thinks of those creatures—she wants to destroy them more than I do. Peace is for people without enemies.”
They stood silently for a while then. Nikki looked to the millipede, but it was calmly gazing around the Guard offices, studying the age-darkened wood of the ceiling beams.
“Enemies are for people without peace,” said Robin.
Gloriana shot a surprised look at the girl. Robin flushed and looked down at her feet; she was drawing invisible squares on the worn floorboards. “I’m sorry,” she murmured. “I was just practicing my negatives, turning things around backward.”
Gloriana shrugged. “You can turn almost anything around and it’ll seem to make sense.”
“That’s why I always have my students learn that,” said Jordan. “It’s a good thing to remember when you’re grown up too.”
“Don’t lecture me, teacher,” Gloriana said. She turned away and called to one of her officers, “Are you ready?”
The man nodded, hitching a heavy gun onto his shoulder. Four other officers stood near him, gathering their equipment.
“All right,” said Gloriana. She turned back to Nikki and her friends. “I’m taking a squad with me to the Cathedral. There’s room in the flier for you if you want us to drop you anywhere.”
Nikki was suddenly filled with a sense of urgency. She couldn’t just go home now and leave the Guard people to do … whatever they might do.
Besides—and the realization came to her with a twinge of guilt—she had forgotten that Gregorian’s fire was to be the focus of the service at the Cathedral tonight. She ought to be there. (Gregorian, she thought. I forgot all about you. How strange.)
“I’ll go to the Cathedral with you,” she said to Gloria
na. “I have to meet someone there.”
The millipede stirred from its quiet observance of the activities of the Guard officers. “I will go to the Cathedral too,” it said.
Gloriana eyed the foreigner for a moment, then shrugged. “No tour of Cirque is complete without seeing one of our temples, I suppose.”
“Yes,” said the millipede.
“Come on, then,” said Gloriana, and she led them out the door onto the landing field, where evening winds played in the open air. Nikki stayed beside Jordan, taking comfort from his size and his quiet, calm manner.
As they approached a large Guard flier, Nikki noticed that Robin was still with them. “How will you get home?” she asked the girl.
“I’m not going home yet,” Robin said. “I want to see what happens at the service tonight.”
“But won’t your parents be expecting you home … for dinner or something?”
“My parents,” said Robin defiantly, “treat me like an adult. They’ll expect me when they see me.”
Jordan stopped and turned to look with concern at her. “Robin, I can’t let you go to this service,” he said.
Robin waved dismissively at him. “Oh, Jordan, quit worrying about me. Class hours were over a long time ago; you’re not responsible for me now.”
“But this is a dangerous situation; you heard what Gloriana said. We can’t take someone as young as you to the service.”
Robin didn’t even hesitate; she walked past Jordan and joined the others as they climbed into the flier. “I’ve been a full citizen for over a year now. You can’t stop me, Jordan, so don’t try.”
He cast an appealing look at Gloriana. She shook her head. “I agree; she shouldn’t go with us. But I have no power to stop her.”
Smiling, Robin sat comfortably between Nikki and the millipede, staring out the windows as the flier took off.
Nikki watched the landing field tilt away beneath them as the craft banked eastward toward the Final Cataract. Black shadows of buildings and trees stretched ahead of them across open fields, and rocky precipices glowed in the evening light, a red-golden rim above the gaping chasm that was the center of Cirque. Nikki tried to see down into that mysterious darkness, but it was as impenetrable as ever.