Evidently not, because Jess stared downward for a moment before glancing back at his face. “Yes, well.” She cleared her throat. “Flattered and all that, but not interested.”
He wasn’t having that. “Oh, you’re interested all right. You’re body isn’t lying, even if your mouth is. We’ll have to work on this propensity of yours to deny your true desires.” He paused, as her eyes widened. “Later. No, don’t dig the hole any deeper. Carry on with your story.”
“Standing here?” She leaned back slightly and looked him in the eyes. “Like this?”
The tell-tale pulse in her neck that David realized was her personal mood barometer was beating in double time once more. “You can take your jeans off if you want.”
Jess shook her head. “No thanks, and have you arranged my transport home?”
“Ah, come on now, Jess,” he chided her gently. “You’ve told me very little and not even looked around. Why would I be doing that yet? So hey, finish, and bare your all—I know metaphorically only. Look at it this way, the sooner you tell me, the sooner you can finish your visit and leave. If you want to.”
She looked at him as if he’d gotten two heads, and grown horns. “Oh, I want to.”
David didn’t tell her he was going to do his damnedest to make her change her mind. “Then the faster you tell me…” he prompted her and let his voice trail off.
“The closer I am to going home,” Jess said.
There was no point in contradicting her. “If you say so.”
“Oh, I do, now where was I? Oh yeah, so Kath and I decided we liked how we made each other feel, and became lovers, and it was amazing. You know I never ever imagined I’d like a woman touching me? But her hands were so soft and her tongue so… Oh fuck, am I really saying this?”
She put her hands to her cheeks. David took hold of them and put them down by her side. “Yes, and it’s beautiful. It’s obvious your relationship with Kath isn’t what’s upset you and hurt you, so what did?” He knew he was pushing hard, but David had the impression if he didn’t they’d be there all night and no further forward.
Jess sighed. It was the most heart wrenching sound David had ever heard, and he had no option but to wait for her to carry on.
“I wanted to go traveling, Kath didn’t. She wanted to go to uni and study art. I knew I wanted to teach, but I wanted to see a bit of the world first. So off I set. Somehow I think we both knew that each other wasn’t going to be enough, and that was fine. If nothing else we’d shown each other what a caring relationship was all about. We had a great last night together, and off I went. At first I had a whale of a time. Thailand, Bali all the Brit backpack routes. I met lots of people, made friends and life was great. Then I moved on to Australia. I’d met up with a few other Brits and we traveled together, until we ended up in Melbourne. And I met Pete. Then everything went pear shaped, not that I realized that at first. I fell for him big time. He was a few years older than me, hot as hell and a blond surfer dude. My pussy went into spasms when I looked at him, and when he touched me? I thought I’d died and gone to heaven. I mean I’d have done anything for him. And the bastard realized that.”
“A wanna-be Dom?” David had a sinking feeling he knew the answer even before Jess laughed harshly.
“Oh yes, and the rest. At first well it was all fine, and”—she blushed—“turned me on. I always enjoyed that wee sting—you know, where it’s almost sore, but isn’t?”
He grinned and kissed her nose. Her face was scarlet. David appreciated how difficult it must be for her to tell him and could have kissed her senseless for her bravery. When she made up her mind to share her secrets she did it with no holds barred.
“Well, he sort of hit the spot with that every time. Then he told me he’d decided we needed more, and he was going to show me just what it was. With hindsight, I should have seen big ‘hold on’ warning signs. But until then? It had all been brilliant. He’d always asked me to do things, been kind and considerate, and well so reasonable, even when I wasn’t sure about anything. But it was like he had a personality transplant. He picked me up—thank goodness I hadn’t agreed to move in with him—took me back to his house and showed me a room he’d prepared for us. Even then I was so bloody besotted, I just stood there like a bloody moron. You see, I told him the mental picture of being blindfolded, or tied up and spanked excited me.” She wriggled and her breath hitched.
And it still does even if she doesn’t want to admit it. I bet if I put my hand on her clit she’d come in the blink of an eyelid. I wonder if she’s a screamer? How he hoped he’d get the chance to find out. It had been a long time since David had felt so helpless. Here he was, a respected Master and Dom, and lost for words.
Not words, the right words. He could utter all the correct platitudes, he knew that. However, for Jess, he needed more, and he was worried he’d not find the words that worked. He let go of her wrists and cuddled her tight to him. Her breath was warm above the open neckline of his shirt, and stirred the hairs that showed there. This is where I want her to be. Where I want to be. Together with Jess, holding her in my arms and never letting go. The picture didn’t make him pull back. Instead it seemed natural.
Jess was silent for a while. As much as he wanted to move things on, make her talk and let him help her—if he could—for a short while, David was content just as they were. Holding her and showing his support in that way.
“Well maybe it would have been,” she added. Her voice was so soft, David had to strain to hear. “Exciting, I mean, except not all together, and not left alone. Oh, David, I was scared, so scared, and even when I shouted, he didn’t come. I was so sure I was going to die.” She shuddered and he could hear how close to tears again she was.
“What?”
She jumped and David cursed himself for shouting. “Sorry, sweet, I’m not shouting at you.” He stroked her back and nuzzled her hair. “Just at the asshole. He left you alone how?”
No one but no one ever leaves a sub bound and blindfolded.
Chapter Nine
In a strange way, the fact David was so obviously angry helped Jess lose any embarrassment she had. After all, she had been an idiot, and she had felt scared. But on the flip side, she had gotten out of the relationship and returned to Scotland. But not lived. She ignored that little voice.
“He blindfolded me, tied me face down to the bed and flogged me. It hurt like hell, and even when I screamed red, he ignored me. He kept saying he couldn’t hear me. I think I passed out, cos the next thing I can remember was shouting for someone to help me, and no one came.” As ever, imaginary spiders did their usual scratchy and crawly dance over her skin when she remembered how frightened she’d been. “I have no idea how long I was there for until I realized the knot round my wrist was slack. Seriously it was weird, because I only needed to sort of wriggle my hands and it came undone. Then I got rid of the blindfold, and realized I was all by myself. I got dressed and left the flat. And never saw him again. But my backside was cut to ribbons and I’ve still got the scars.”
“Where was he?” David’s tone was icy, and even held in the warmth of his arms, it sent shivers of fear skittering along Jess’s spine.
“Dead.”
“Dead? Dead how?” David’s shocked words reverberated through her.
“Well it might sound harsh, but poetic judgment maybe. Evidently he’d gotten another woman under his thumb, and he’d done the same thing to her a couple of days before. Blindfolded her, tied her up, flogged her and walked out of the room. Seems it was his thing, listening to someone pleading and worried while he hid and jerked off. Eventually he’d untied her, and she’d gone and told her brothers. They deemed justice was needed. It seems they’d called round, found him and taken him away. He was found by the river, well dead, but no one could ever pin anything on him, and whatever the Aussie equivalent of death by misadventure was recorded. Meanwhile someone, also unknown, made sure my hands were easy to release, waited until they heard me move ar
ound, left the flat and stayed close by until they saw me leave.” She swallowed. Jess hadn’t known how cathartic it would be to tell someone everything. That awful night, and how she’d felt, had never been mentioned to anyone.
“Ah, love, no wonder you wanted to castrate Jeff.”
“And you,” Jess felt compelled to point out.
A quick look of disgust flashed across his face, and he grunted. “And me. How did you find all this out?”
“Well, I was damned sure I wanted to come home straight away, but I had a fixed flight. While I was waiting to sort a new flight out, I carried on working in this little café near the beach. A couple of days after I’d gotten away, these two guys came in for coffee, and told me they knew what had happened, that he’d done it before and wouldn’t ever again. Pete was dead, and no one would connect me with him. That’s when it struck me that he’d never actually taken me anywhere we could be spotted. Like I said, talk about naïve and a first class idiot. And telling myself that he was a clever manipulative shit doesn’t help very much. Believe me I’ve tried. So I came home, went to uni, earned my degree, taught for a few years, got to be a lecturer and voila here we are. My life in a nutshell.” Jess let her breath out in a long whoosh.
“Not quite.”
The not quite conversational, more of a demand note in his voice alerted Jess to the fact that perhaps she wasn’t going to like what David said next.
“When was the last time you had a man—or a woman?”
She was right, she didn’t. Jess pulled back and this time he let her go. She paced across the room, and ignored the way the lace of her knickers seemed to have gotten wedged between her butt cheeks and chafed like crazy. The silk of his shirt was smooth and sensual on her skin, and she hitched it up as it once more began a descent off her shoulder. She was positive she should have done more buttons up, but there was no way she could do that now, not without acting like a total loser. David stared at her, his thumbs tucked into his pockets. The action stretched the denim that covered his legs, and outlined the long firm length of his cock. Damn, if he didn’t have that shirt tucked in, I’d bet my wine his dick would be peering over the waistband to say hi. And I’d be shaking its head, er, hand, er… Fuck it…
“That, buster, is none of your business.” And there was no way she was going to tell him how many years, months, weeks, days—and with a quick look at her watch—hours and minutes it had been. “Long enough to know what I do and don’t need. So, now I’ve told you, get whatever else you insist on over and done with, eh? A glass of wine, my e-reader and my bed are calling.” And I hope to hell I make it out of here in one piece. “I’m happy with my lot.”
“So, if you’re happy, why are you running away? Surely if you’re happy, nothing here’s going to bother you. And if you’re not interested, why are your nipples boring a hole in my shirt, your pussy damp, your channel full and your clit throbbing like the drums at a rock concert? I don’t need you naked to know that—or that you’re lying to yourself, Jessica. And to me. If you want to kid yourself you’re not aching for me to show you how a proper Dom acts, that’s your problem. But you don’t lie to me about it. Do you understand?”
With a humph, Jess managed not to cross her arms over her nipples. Her tight, and prominent as cherries on a cake, nipples. She daren’t answer him, so she nodded instead.
“Good. So if I said after we’ve looked around, I’m happy to be your teacher, and show you just how amazing and perfect a true Dom-sub relationship is, what would you say?”
He stared at her, his gaze penetrating and his face calm. Was he as unperturbed as he portrayed? A tiny almost unnoticeable tic at the side of his eye seemed to say otherwise. Jess was convinced he was willing her on to hand him her trust and move forward.
Jess twirled her hair around her finger and studied the strands. She was convinced there were a few split ends that needed trimming. Her juices gathered as she considered his words. Did she want it? Oh, she knew to see the other side of the coin was the only way to kill the demons, but was she ready to go there? After all, she reasoned with herself, it’s only these last few hours I’ve remembered what happened and not thrown up.
“Um…” Duh, articulate or what? “I don’t know. Look, David, just show me around and let me go. Don’t you think I’ve had enough angst for one evening? Two hours ago, I was under the impression I was off clubbing for a dance, a few drinks and a dissing of the too-young lads. Then I found I’d been tricked. By my own brother and my best friend. Oh, it’s okay, I accept that in actual fact they didn’t know, totally, why I had no interest in finding a partner, or as Kath so nicely put it, getting out of my rut and rutting.” She snorted. “They just came to the conclusion I’d met an asshole who’d come on too strong.” Her eyes hardened. “No?”
“Ask them”
She raised her eyebrows and bit her lip. “Don’t you worry I will. Even so, this is a bit of a leap. And you? Okay, yeah if it wasn’t for all the Master and sub stuff, I admit I might be attracted.” Oh grief did I actually say that? Talk about foot in mouth syndrome.
David laughed. A deep, warm, wrap around her and think of chocolate laugh. It snuck inside her veins and circulated round her body in a zing of excitement.
“Might. Come on now, Jess, think on. I might not be your Dom yet—which is perhaps as well, or you’d be finding out how you enjoyed a spanking for punishment not pleasure rather sooner than either of us anticipated. However, you owe it to both of us to be honest.”
I do? Her knickers were damp between her legs, and her clit was clenched around one side of them as if it was the safely net between it and sudden death. The analogy made her laugh. Wasn’t a little death what she was hoping for at some point? Even if it was self helped. Jess twitched her toes in her shoes. They pinched, and not in the way she wondered she’d feel if David pinched her somewhere else. She couldn’t deny it, she probably did.
“I guess. Okay, you’re right. Yes. I’m attracted.” She’d hate to see her color in a mirror. Opening up wasn’t on the top of her things to do on a Friday evening. “And there’s no need to look so smug. I haven’t said what or who to.”
Davis shook his head. “Oh, Jess-i-ca. Okay, now then, let’s both be honest. I took one look at you and thought, yes. Mine. And it stopped me in my tracks. My boss’ sister, hell my boss as well, even if she doesn’t know it. Bloody hell, I want her bound under me, feeling the sweet sting of my flogger on her ass, and showing me how I make her fly. On her knees in front of me, calling me Sir and well…” he hesitated and ran his hand through his hair. “I’m man enough to want it all.”
That shook her. There was nothing like putting your cards on the table. This was openness with a vengeance. If he could admit to instant attraction, then why couldn’t she?
He bit his lip. Jess smothered a smirk. Did he prescribe to the three nibbles and you’re spanked rule for himself? Of course he saw it, and grinned. “Yeah, okay. If I do it three times I’ll hand the paddle over.”
“Done.” Jess walked back to him and stuck her hand out. “Shake on it.”
David rolled his eyes. “You are a brat, you know, and you know what happens to bratty subs?” He took her hand and jerked. Taken by surprise, Jess stumbled and hit his chest with a thud. Her over-sensitive nipples stung, and an arrow of fire rushed to her clit.
“Wha—?” She didn’t finish her word. David’s mouth closed over her lips and his tongue pushed passed her lips to tangle with hers. Jess relaxed against him and let herself be drawn into his orbit. Her mind absorbed every last sense of wellbeing and her body responded to his scent and heat. Her clit was once more doing the rumba, and her channel muscles practiced for the ‘who can hold a penny longest’ contest.
The sharp tap to her ass was unexpected.
Chapter Ten
She was good at the ‘How dare you, but dammit I like it’ looks. David smiled and administered three more taps in quick succession. They weren’t hard enough to do more than giv
e her a tiny sting that would be over almost before it began, but he’d reasoned it was time to how her some of the pleasure he could give her.
“Enough,” Jess said in an uneven voice. It was an, ‘I ohh like it but can’t cope’ whisper, not a shouted, ‘Stop, or I’ll bite your balls off’ demand.
“Is that your safe word, Jess?” David strove to keep it light, to reassure her and not freak her. Tension emanated from her like a force field of electrical sparks. It was a wonder the air didn’t crackle from all the static. “Because I don’t think it will do, it’s not acceptable. It has so many subtle nuances.”
“Eh? Safe word?” She stared at him and blinked. David had never noticed the amber lights in her eyes. “I’ve never had one.”
Fu…ck…
“Did Peter the Plonker not discuss safe words with you?”
“Peter the… Oh, I love it. Nope.” She shook her head and her hair flew around her face in a red vibrant arc. “Now I know what a dangerous man he was. Then I had no idea. I have heard about them, and stuff, now though. But I’ve never had a need for one. Seriously, my sex life has been about as conspicuous as my belly button ring.”
He couldn’t help himself. David glanced down to where his shirt outlined her trim waist. She giggled.
“I don’t have one. A belly button ring, or a safe word.”
“I think you do now. At least about the safe word. We’ll think about the body jewelry later, though I fancy a clit clamp on you myself.” David ignored the gasp. His cock was doing its best to bore a hole in his jeans. He needed to either bury it in her and fuck her until she screamed her release, or make his apologies and disappear into the shower for five minutes. Then give himself a quick, not nearly as satisfactory hand job.
“Right, safe words,” he said briskly. “Shall we follow the traffic light system?” David swore he would have heard a pin drop, the room was so quiet.
Secrets Shared Page 6
