by Roman Koidl
“Come on. It will be over soon,” I tried to calm her down.
“You’ve been saying that since I know you,” she bursted out in anger.
“You sound like a broken record,” she added stroking swiftly with her hands through her hair and pulling it outwards.
She always does this when she’s stressed. I knew this is not going to be a fun night out.
“Loretta. Trust me. Everything will be fine and I will get a job very soon,” I started to lose my patience with her pessimism.
“I only want a normal life for the two of us,” she gestured in frustration.
“Why don’t we just move in together?” she asked.
“You know why. I just cannot afford it right now and I don’t know where I will get a job,” I defended myself calmly.
“Whatever. I just don’t know how long I can be like this,” she added changing her anger into resentment.
For the rest of the evening I was only thinking about our conversation at the Italian restaurant. Something had to happen.
I didn’t stay with Loretta that night. The conversation still stood between us. The rest of the week I spent doing that which I was doing now for months – applying for jobs. I started to search the job market from a coffee shop. Sitting at home in my dark room just made me too frustrated. Sitting in a busy coffee shop gave me some drive in my search. I didn’t feel lonely even though I didn’t speak with anyone. I was just sitting there all day in front of my laptop in the hope of finding THE job. One morning as I was on my way to a local coffee shop my phone rang.
“Hello?” I answered.
“Mr. Wright?” The man on the other line asked me.
“Yes. Speaking.”
“Hello, this is Ronald Skladden from the Altana Group speaking,” he introduced himself.
“Hello Mr. Skladden. How are you?” I responded.
“Great, thanks. Did you have a chance to think about our offer?” he asked me.
“Well, I did and I must say that I really do not want to do an internship anymore. I have done too many already,” I replied honestly.
“I understand that absolutely, but consider that you will not be interning with us for ever. We have former interns with us that are now project managers,” he tried to talk sweet to me.
“Wow, that’s amazing,” I responded, somehow impressed by the future prospective he showed me.
“Let’s do this, I will give it another thought and let you know by tomorrow,” I suggested.
“Sounds good to me,” he responded happily.
“Talk to you tomorrow then. Take care,” he added hanging up.
Oh boy. Now I was confused. Should I do it and be an intern again or trust that I can find something better? My thoughts were bouncing back and forth.
“One tai-chi latte, please.”
“You mean chai tea latte?” the barista corrected me.
I always confused the two words and called the Indian spiced tea accidently after the old Chinese fighting technique.
“Yes, that’s what I meant,” I smiled tapping my forehead with my fingertips.
I was sitting in front of my laptop thinking about the offer again. Norah Jones was playing in the background.
“Even though it’s only an internship, you could rise within the company and create a career,” my good angel on my right shoulder was whispering into my ear.
“They will just use you and then fire and replace you with a new intern,” the evil devil on my other shoulder told me.
I never wanted to react out of fear and jump into something but this time I believed that maybe it wouldn’t be too bad to accept
the offer. My life won’t be over because of this decision. And it could ease Loretta as well and buy me some more time.
This day I did something very unusual. I didn’t talk to anyone about the offer and didn’t ask for advice. I tried to listen to my gut feeling. And that said take it.
As the next morning arrived, I was 110% positive about the offer. I even became anxious that they would maybe not be interested in me anymore.
I was awake since 7 a.m. trying to distract myself until I could call at around 10 a.m. I didn’t believe that they would be in the office before that. I put on my running shoes and jogged for a while, and upon returning had a long shower and large breakfast.
9.35 a.m. I looked at my watch. 9.35 a.m. or 10 a.m. won’t make a big difference.
Beeeep, Beeeep.
Beeeep, Beeeep.
“Altana Group, good morning. You are talking to Stacey. How may I assist you?” the young voice answered.
“Hello. My name is Patrick Wright. Is Mr. Skladden in already?” I asked anxiously.
“Please hold!”
“Altana Group. Your partner in specialist public relations,” a deep masculine voice advertised. I hate being on hold.
“Hello Mr. Wright!” a friendly voice answered.
“Hello Mr. Skladden.”
“I hope you have good news for me?” he said cheerfully.
“I would like to accept your offer,” I said calmly “but I would like to be working on your biggest project,” I pushed my luck.
“Mhhh? Why is that?” he asked surprised.
“I don’t just want to be an intern. I have a lot to offer and I want to prove this to you as soon as possible,” I explained confidently.
“I understand. But what if you fail on that task?” he inquired doubtfully.
“If I do, you can pull me off the project and I’ll do what every other intern at your firm does,” I offered.
“Interesting. I must say, you’ve got balls. I like that,” he said positively surprised.
“I’ll have my assistant finish the paperwork. Can you start next Monday?” he asked.
“Monday? Sure. When should I be there?” I counter asked.
“Normally we start at 9 a.m. but because it’s your first day I’ll expect you at 10 a.m.,” he said.
“Great. Looking forward to it,” I responded, excited.
“See you next Monday then. Take care,” he said as he hung up.
I felt I took the right decision. I send Loretta a text telling her about the news. Additionally, I sent out an email to my brother, Sarah, and John to inform them of the same. Now there was no holding back anymore. I have a job. Well an internship but at least I am back in the workforce again.
I ran down the stairs telling my mom and dad. Everybody seemed happy for me. I did not tell everyone the absolute truth about the position. I tweaked the reality just a little stating that they will only keep me as an intern for three months and then hire me as a junior consultant. I put pressure on myself. In three months I needed some measurable success.
Chapter 10
This doesn’t feel right
Day 1
Piiiiiiep. Piiiiiiep. Piiiiiiep.
7.30 a.m. Time to get up. My first day. I hardly slept the night before. Even though I wasn’t happy about the offer at the beginning, my mood changed and now I was looking forward to the new internship. I was picturing myself in a Porsche, flying all over the globe, being super busy and wanted by everyone, and most of all being married to Loretta, living in a nice house, and having a family with her. Crazy thoughts, but they say that everything starts with a dream. As I was on my way to the office – I like the sound of this, The Office – I received a text message from Loretta:
Good luck on your first day. I love you!
I smiled reading it. I love you, I whispered.
“Thank you but you’re a bit too young for me,” the older woman beside me in the train said smiling at me.
“Oh, no I just got a text,” I explained.
“Well, a pity I was hoping we could go for coffee,” she joked.
The day is starting great.
Here I was, standing in front of the tall red office building. It was right between two other similar looking buildings with the large Altana Group emblem positioned over the entrance. The company had a global network of Publ
ic Relations and Advertisement agencies.
“Hi my name is Patrick Wright. I’m starting today,” I introduced myself to the lady at the front desk.
“Welcome. How exciting, first day,” she smiled. “Who’s your supervisor?”
“Mr. Skladden,” I replied, putting my brown leather briefcase on the counter.
“Oh?” she remarked.
“’Oh?’ What do you mean?” I asked anxiously.
“Oh nothing, Mr. Skladden is a very smart man,” she remarked while picking up the phone.
“Hey Tracey, Tesh from downstairs. I’ve got a young gentleman with the name Patrick Wright standing here,” she smiled at me.
“OK. I’ll tell him. Bye,” she ended the conversation and hung up.
“Take a seat. Someone will be with you in a minute,” she pointed to the couch by the wall.
I was sitting on the same couch as I was here for my interview.
Weird feeling.
The sound of high heels banging of the ground caught my attention. A young attractive blond lady approached me.
“Hi Patrick, welcome. We are so excited to have you. I’m Tracey, Mr. Skladden’s assistant,” she greeted me while offering me her hand.
“Hi, thank you. Likewise,” I replied standing up from the couch grabbing my briefcase.
“Let me show you your desk, introduce you to the team and then give you a brief tour through the building,” she mapped out the next twenty minutes for me.
As we were standing in the elevator we started to make small talk. She seemed nice. That gave me confidence.
She escorted me into a large office with several desks attached to one another forming little islands.
“Here is your table,” she tapped her hand on a white desk.
“Great,” I said smiling.
“Drop your bag and I’ll introduce you to the team and show you the kitchen, the copy room, and the bathrooms.” She charmingly started to take command again.
After the short tour, I took a seat at my desk waiting for my first day to start. The minutes passed and nothing happened. Minutes turned into two hours. Everybody was working away but me. This doesn’t feel right. After surfing the internet for several hours feeling more and more depressed about this internship Mr. Skladden emerged from the elevator.
“Ahh, the new team member!” he greeted me as he was approaching my desk.
“So, how do you like it?” he asked standing in front of me.
“Well, I haven’t done much so far,” I told him.
“Don’t worry, that will change soon,” he tapped my shoulder walking into his office.
The day ended as it started. I did nothing. I literally wasted a day of my life doing absolutely nothing. I didn’t feel too happy as I was riding the train home. I promised to myself that the next day will be better.
Day 2
Piiiiiiep. Piiiiiiep. Piiiiiiep.
7.30 a.m. Time to make this day more productive. I gained my confidence again. Today, I will go into the office and be proactive. I’ll ask for tasks. After all, I negotiated with Mr. Skladden that I will be working on his biggest project. Yesterday was the first day. I cannot expect magic on day one. Today is day two. Let’s do it.
“Good morning. Hello. Hi!” I greeted everyone enthusiastically as I made my way to my desk.
Here I was again sitting in front of the computer screen. This time I felt that it would be different.
“Good morning Patrick!” Tracey approached me from the side.
“Hi!” I responded waving my hand.
“I didn’t get a chance to show you how to use the copy machine yesterday,” she remarked.
“We would need 500 copies of this leaflet for our conference next week,” she said as she placed a colorful envelope sized leaflet on to my table.
“Come, I’ll show you,” she smiled at me tucking the sides of her white blouse into her red tube skirt.
Great. I didn’t come here to copy papers.
I nodded and followed her into the copy room.
“So, you place the item that should be copied here between the marks,” she started to explain moving her freshly manicured hands over the glass plate of the machine.
“Then you type in the number of copies that should be made and chose the quality and size,” she went on leaning slightly back as she was tapping the touch screen.
I stood beside her trying to fake interest. In reality, I was devastated about this development. But it’s only day two. See what happens tomorrow.
Day 3
Piiiiiiep. Piiiiiiep. Piiiiiiep.
7.30 a.m. Oh no, I do not want to get up.
Piiiiiiep. Piiiiiiep. Piiiiiiep.
7.50 a.m. Ok, better get up. Let’s put the left leg out of bed first. As my toe was peeking out from under the duvet a chill went through me. Cold day. Better wear a sweater.
As I was shaving, I looked at myself in the mirror. Today you won’t mess around. You will approach Mr. Skladden and demand to be taken seriously.
“Hello...Hi…Good morning!” I greeted the people sitting at their desks.
Let’s check my emails first and then talk to Mr. Skladden.
“Hello, you’re the new intern?” a young girl approached my desk.
“Yes. You are?” I asked smiling at her.
“I’m Toni. I’m an intern here as well,” she introduced herself shaking my hand.
“Oh, I didn’t know that there a more interns,” I replied surprised.
“Yes, we are actually seven including you,” she explained sitting down on my desk.
“How long have you been here?,” I asked.
“Five months now. Still have one to go and then back to school,” she told me.
“May I ask if you are happy here? This is my third day and I haven’t been doing much besides copying some leaflets,” I asked her curiously.
“It won’t get much better, believe me,” she shook her head in disappointment.
“What do you mean?” I asked in disbelief.
“Well, they don’t really trust the work of the interns that much. Mostly we sit together back there and do our own thing. Sometimes, we get the car and are allowed to drive to the supermarket to buy large amounts of coffee for the office,” she explained.
My entire body sacked in. My morning hopes disappeared.
“And you are still here?” I asked her looking blank.
“It’s good to have this company on the resume and we interns have a lot of fun when we sit together,” she explained naïvely.
I was trying to understand her position. She was still in school and looked like she was in her early twenties. Therefore, she wasn’t as desperate as I was for a job. She must have still had the idea that life will turn out great. I really hoped for her it would turn out great, because I’ve been there and now I’m here.
“Well, if you want to join, just come over to us. You’re more than welcome,” she invited me to sit with the other interns.
“Thanks, I will later,” I responded.
I have to speak to Mr. Skladden right now.
I approached his office not seeing him inside. Tracey’s office was right next to his.
“Hi Patrick. How can I help you?” she smiled at me as I stood in front of her desk.
“When is Mr. Skladden in? I need to talk to him,” I told her looking into the empty office.
“That will take a while. He traveled to South America yesterday for a long-term project he is supervising. He will be gone for the next three months,” she explained playing with her round silver earring.
“Oh. OK. Thanks,” I responded surprised.
“Can I help you in instead?” she asked.
“No, it’s OK. Thanks anyways,” I responded, walking back to my desk.
Oh Jesus. My hands stroked through my gelled hair.
I was out of ideas. I was frustrated and unhappy with the situation. Now that Mr. Skladden was gone for the next three months how can I then work on the big projects? He
’s the decision maker. I didn’t see myself staying under these circumstances for the next three months in the hope that he would change the situation for me when he returns like a knight coming to save the sleeping beauty out of the arms of a dragon.
On my way home from the office I gave Loretta a call.
“Do you understand my dilemma?” I asked her after telling her about everything that happened so far.
“Yes I do. Just try to stick with it and apply to other places,” she advised me.
“But it’s not that easy. I cannot do it from there and when I come home I am so demotivated that I only want to cry,” I told her walking to the train station.
Upps, I should have not just said that. Not sexy.
“Well you are old enough to know what’s best for you but you are driving me away if you jump from one place to the next,” she laid out the scenario.
“I understand but I’m just wasting my time,” I explained trying to win her over.
“Sure, it’s frustrating but things take a while to start,” she said.
“But look at the other interns,” I said frustrated.
“They have been there for more than five months just sitting around. It won’t get better, believe me,” I said getting more and more annoyed about the situation.
“Ok Patrick. I see. Just do what you think is the smartest,” she answered calmly.
“Well, let’s see what tomorrow has to bring,” I said breathing heavy.
“I’m just about to get onto the train. I don’t have any reception in there. I’ll call when I get out,” I explained taking a seat between people reading their newspapers in the busy rush hour train.
“Sure. Talk later then,” she answered, hanging up.
Day 4
Piiiiiiep. Piiiiiiep. Piiiiiiep.
7.30 a.m.
Piiiiiiep. Piiiiiiep. Piiiiiiep.
8.30 a.m. I’m quitting.
“Patrick, you’re late,” Tracey greeted me as I approached her desk.
“I’m quitting the internship,” I said with a strong voice.
