Drawing in a ragged breath, he said, “Cops found me like that. They dragged me out of the room to examine her, talk to me. Just as I was going to the door, I looked back at her one last time. They were pulling the sheet off her body. She was naked…covered in bruises and bites. Everywhere. It was obvious she’d been raped.”
“Oh, Aidan…no.”
“I went a little crazy then. Dove toward her. Took three men to pull me out of the room.
“They ended up handcuffing me to keep me from going back to her. They asked questions, I answered them. I was in shock. Wasn’t thinking straight. It wasn’t until they took me to the station for questioning that I realized they thought I might’ve done it.
“I agreed to DNA testing. Though I heard one of the detectives mutter that it was probably useless because the bastard had used bleach to clean her up. That was where the disinfectant smell had come from.
“They asked me to take my shirt off. I realized later they wanted to see if I had scratches on me. It was obvious that Mellie had fought hard against her attacker. No way the bastard wasn’t bleeding. Once they saw I had no injuries, they loosened up a little, but they still had no other suspects.
“Insane, I know, but it never occurred to me to suspect Simon. When I was able to think straight again, I had the thought that I should call him. Let him know. I thought he’d be almost as devastated as I was.
“My parents were in Europe on vacation. My sister, Jenn, was only eighteen at the time but smart as a whip. And, thankfully, she was thinking rationally. Much more so than me. She called the family attorney. He got in touch with a top criminal defense attorney, who came to my rescue. The police let me go.
“I learned later that the police tried to find Simon, but he was nowhere to be found. They called his dad, who swore he hadn’t heard from him.
“That was my first realization that it could have been Simon. I was assuming a break-in. Never once considered it could be someone I knew. A friend. Other than Mellie, my best friend.
“No evidence was left behind. Nothing that could tie anyone to the murder. But with Simon’s disappearance, it became obvious to the police who’d done it.
“Took me longer. After a few days of not being able to find him, though, I finally accepted it. By then he was in the wind. His dad swore…swore till the day he died that he didn’t know where his son was. Said Simon had enough money to disappear without his help. He tried to defend Simon. Said the sex was consensual, but it must’ve got out of hand. That his son would never do something like that.
“I never saw Simon or his father again. His dad tried to contact me from time to time. I always sent back a message that until his son came forward and faced what he did, I didn’t want any contact with him. He died a few years back.”
“Did you go to the funeral?”
“Yes. Just in case Simon showed up. He didn’t.”
“What about your residency? You left your medical career behind?”
“I was twenty-three years old and felt like my life was over. I moved back home, to my parents’ house. Didn’t do anything for months other than try to find Simon. We hired private investigators. Finding him was the only thing I lived for.
“My family was my rock. Don’t know what I would have done without them. About six months after it happened, I realized Simon wasn’t going to be found. His father swore he didn’t know where his son was, but I didn’t believe him. Problem was, Dr. Cook had enough money and connections to hide his son forever.
“I knew I needed to get on with my life, but going back to being a doctor had no appeal. I just didn’t have any passion for it anymore. I talked to my parents. Even though they didn’t want me to, I joined the Army.
“I got a lot tougher, but the anger was still there. When I left the Army, I thought about going back into medicine, but the fire never came back. I worked construction for a while. Working with my hands soothed something inside me. And I started dating again. Nothing serious. Jenn was insistent that I find someone. She wore me down, so I agreed to go out with Kristen, a friend of hers. We only dated a couple of times…just didn’t click.
“Then I met Amy. She was the niece of one of my father’s friends. She came to a cookout we held for my parents’ anniversary. We hit it off. It wasn’t crazy love or anything, but we had fun together. We had been dating about three months when I got a frantic call from her. She had been attacked, beaten, and drugged. When she woke, she was naked and had a message carved across her chest. ‘Simon says hi.’”
Aidan shook his head. Even after all these years, he still had trouble accepting his naïveté and stupidity. “After that happened, my sister told me that Kristen had been raped a few months before. Jenn said she hadn’t mentioned it to me because she thought it would bring back bad memories. The guy was never caught, but she never considered it could have been Simon. Kristen was knocked unconscious…she never saw her rapist.”
“Then are you sure it was Simon? Did he leave a message like he did with Amy? Was there any DNA?”
“He used a condom. No DNA was found, but an S was carved into Kristen’s chest. The attack happened in Denver. Kristen was visiting her brother at the time. My sister didn’t know about the carving. Only about the rape.”
“But Amy wasn’t raped?”
“No. I don’t know why. She was knocked unconscious, too. But she was also drugged. The police thought he might’ve been scared away before he could rape her. Who knows? Maybe he thought the carving was enough.”
“And you blame yourself.”
“Of course I blame myself. How can I not? Two women I dated were attacked and cut up. One was raped. All because of me.”
“Because of Simon. Not you.”
“It doesn’t matter. I knew then I could never have another relationship. And that I needed to disappear. My family is always on guard. They have personal protection, twenty-four seven. I don’t think Simon would hurt them. That’s not the way he wants to hurt me. But I won’t take any chances. Not until Simon’s no longer a threat.
“I force myself to see them only when we can get away privately.”
“What happened to Kristen and Amy?”
“They’ve both recovered…as best they can. Kristen is married, has a family. And Amy?” He shrugged. “Last I heard, she was married again. Her third marriage. She moves around a lot.
“I can’t risk any kind of contact with them. Not that either of them would want to hear from me, I’m sure.”
“You’ve been looking for him all this time. Have there been sightings or leads?”
“No sightings, but I focused most of my search in Colombia. Simon’s mother’s family is from there. They have money and influence. It makes sense that he would go to them. They’ve denied that he’s contacted them, but I have no reason to believe they’re telling the truth.”
“That’s why you were there, in Cali? You got a lead on him?” She stiffened and twisted toward him. “And I prevented you from—”
Aidan held up his hand. “It doesn’t matter. I knew going in it was likely either a hoax or a trap.”
“A trap? Aidan, why would you—”
“Because I have to find him, Anna. Don’t you see? Until he pays for what he did, I can’t let go. Who knows? He could be raping and killing other women, too.” Aidan shook his head. “I know in my gut that he’s still out there somewhere, just waiting. Hoping I’ll have some kind of relationship that he can destroy. I can’t take that risk. With anyone.”
She didn’t respond to that, but her hand squeezed his gently again. He thought it was the sweetest touch she’d ever given him. She didn’t protest or deny his statement. She was giving him comfort and support.
“So how did you hook up with LCR?”
He huffed out a humorless laugh. “I was infuriated by what Simon had done to Kristen and Amy. So I did a dumbass thing. I held a news conference and addressed Simon directly. Called him every bleepable name in the book. A coward. A lunatic. A sick, twi
sted, perverted SOB. I challenged him to come after me.”
“You played right into his hands. He got to see you hurting.”
A real smile pulled on his mouth. “Exactly what McCall told me. He caught the news conference. Called me, introduced himself. Wanted to know if I’d like to come work for him.
“He’d already done his research, of course. Knew everything about me. I met with him, and that was that.”
“And in your spare time, when you’re not rescuing kidnapped victims and damsels in distress, you look for Simon.”
“Yeah. I’ll never stop looking for him.”
“What will you do when you find him?”
That question pulled him up, made him think. “I’ve gone from wanting to tear him to pieces to taking him out to the desert, stripping him naked, and leaving him for the buzzards.”
“And now?”
“I want to beat the shit out of him and then put him behind bars so he can never hurt anyone again.”
“And then you’ll have peace?”
“Yes.” He turned to her then, needing her to understand this if she didn’t understand anything else. “Remember what you told me before we started up the mountain to rescue Carrie? That you couldn’t bear it if anything happened to me? That’s the way I feel, Anna. I couldn’t bear it if something happened to you. And that’s why whatever is happening between us can’t happen.
“You understand that, don’t you?”
Chapter Twenty-five
Anna woke the next morning with an ache in her heart she didn’t see ever going away. After Aidan’s heartbreaking confession, they’d gone back inside the house. While Anna showered, Aidan had gone off to “secure the house.” He hadn’t told her what that meant, but she figured he needed some time to himself. Dredging up such hideous memories had to have left him both raw and hurting.
Beneath the shower, she’d let her own tears fall. The hurt she felt for him was not only intense to the point of pain, it revealed something she hadn’t allowed herself to totally accept. She loved him. The now and forever kind of love. She had been aware that her feelings for him were stronger than any she’d ever felt, but until that moment she hadn’t accepted how fierce or powerful they were.
After her shower, she’d walked out of the steamy bathroom to find him standing in the middle of the room. His eyes had held a pain so stark she’d almost started crying again. For once, his expression was easy to read.
Anna sat down on the bed and held out her hand. She had seen the surprise in his eyes. He had been expecting her to turn him away. A small part of her heart that still had an ounce of self-preservation left reminded her how much he could hurt her. She squelched it. This man didn’t know it yet, but he already owned her heart. If she could help him, make him hurt less, then she would. Damn the consequences.
He had pulled her to her feet, gathered her in his arms, and held her for several long seconds. Then, as if it was as natural as daybreak, they got into bed. She lay on her side, Aidan pulled her against his chest, molding her against him, spooning her body with his. She had been asleep in seconds.
Several times she had woken in the night, and Aidan had been right beside her, holding her. She wished this could last forever, but she was too much of a realist. Aidan believed he would be putting her in danger by having a relationship with her. Now she knew why he’d been so insistent about staying off the streets in Cali. The helmet and the gosh-awful hat had been to cover her hair. Keeping her head down had been to hide her face.
His biggest fear was having anyone else hurt by the monster who, for reasons only known to Simon Cook, hated Aidan with such intensity.
“Good morning.”
Lost in thought, she hadn’t seen him appear at the doorway. How long had he been standing there, watching her sift through her feelings? Hiding her thoughts was not her best talent.
She worked up what she hoped was a sunny smile. “Morning.”
He came toward her, holding a cup of steaming coffee in his hand.
“If you’re bringing me coffee in bed, I’m nominating you for Man of the Year.”
He handed it to her. “One sugar, no cream.”
She accepted the mug, breathed in the rich, steamy brew, and took an appreciative sip. “You’re my hero.”
His expression didn’t change. He looked serious and still so sad.
“You are, you know. My hero, I mean. Even before you came to my rescue in Colombia, you were. I admire and respect you.” And because she desperately wanted to put lightness back into his eyes, if only for a brief moment, she added, “And you’re a much better cuddler than Jack.”
“Jack?”
“My stuffed pig.”
“You have a stuffed pig?”
“Well, a fake stuffed pig. Not a real one because, well, that would be gross.”
He gave a rapid headshake as if he couldn’t believe he was talking about stuffed pigs. It was silly, yes, but the shadows had disappeared briefly from his eyes, and that was worth a bit of silliness.
“Breakfast is ready. Come out to the balcony when you’re ready.”
The instant he walked out the door, her shoulders slumped. She had no solution for Aidan’s problems. Telling him things would get better would be a lie. How could they? For Aidan, nothing would be resolved until Simon was either dead or in prison. He had moved on as far as he believed he could.
Anna stood, threw off her nightgown, and dressed in another one of Jennifer’s dresses. She had been taught that for every problem there was a solution. There had to be something that could be done.
Aidan slid an omelet onto a plate already loaded with hash browns and toast. Taking it and another one, he walked out onto the balcony. Anna would be here soon, and he needed to be prepared for whatever she threw at him. One of the most refreshing things about Anna was her unpredictability. He never knew what she might say or how she would react to a given situation. For a man who’d mired himself in obligation and duty, Anna’s somewhat zany statements and antics were a welcome relief.
And now that was about to end.
“Smells wonderful.” She scooted into the chair he held out for her. “If you ever leave LCR, you could open your own restaurant.”
She took a bite of her omelet and made a moaning sound. She hid a smile as she noted that Aidan looked away briefly and shifted in his chair. Sometimes torture could be fun.
“When we’re finished with breakfast, I’m going to explore this house from top to bottom. I can’t believe I’ve been here for two days and I still haven’t seen it all.”
“We need to talk about that.”
“You don’t want me exploring the house?”
“Yes. No.” He shook his head. “Explore it to your heart’s content. That’s not what we need to talk about. I’ve heard from McCall. The danger has passed.”
“What do you mean?”
“He talked with Ruiz again. The man’s calmed down enough from his grief to acknowledge that you, Carrie, and I were there against our will and had no part in what happened to his daughter.”
Anna gave a disgusted snort. “I find it hard to believe he’s that upset about his daughter’s death since he’s the one who sent her to murder who knows how many people, including her husband. He’s the one who put her in danger in the first place. What did he think would happen to her if she was discovered?”
“That’s something you’d have to ask him.” He raised his hand and added, “Not that I intend for you to get within a thousand miles of him.”
“He knew exactly what he was sending her into and didn’t give a damn,” she said. “He’s the one who got his daughter killed. No one else.”
“I agree. I don’t think he’s of the same mind, but at least he’s decided we didn’t have anything to do with Elena’s death. And, bottom line, you can go home.”
“Home? Not back to Cali?”
“No.” He leaned forward, hoping she would take his words the right way. “Just because Ruiz claim
s he holds no grudges against you and Carrie doesn’t mean he doesn’t. It would be best if you didn’t return. At least until this thing with Garcia and Ruiz settle down.”
“Will it settle down?”
“Not completely, but at some point it should be less volatile.”
“What if I don’t want to…go home, that is?”
“I don’t want you back in Colombia. I can’t protect you if—”
“That’s not what I’m saying. What if I want to stay here…with you?”
“Anna.” His brow furrowed, and regret filled his eyes. “Sweetheart, I meant what I said last night.”
“I know, and I accept that. But that’s after we leave here. I don’t have to be back at work for another week. Can we take this time, just for us?”
She saw the struggle, guilt warring with want. “And after we leave?”
“No contact. Nothing.”
“Why, Anna? Why would you do that?”
If she told him she loved him, he might still agree to let her stay, but his guilt would be magnified. She couldn’t do that to him, but neither would she lie.
“Because what we have is too wonderful to end right now. I want to make as many memories as I can.” She cocked her head. “Don’t you?”
He stared at her for the longest time. It was difficult, but she maintained eye contact. She hadn’t lied, and despite his insistence that they could never be together after they left the island, she knew he enjoyed being with her.
Scooting his chair back, he stood and held out his hand.
Anna allowed him to pull her up and into his arms. When she put her arms around his neck, he cupped her butt and lifted, giving her no choice but to wrap her legs around his waist.
“What are you doing?”
He strode toward the door. “Making memories.”
Giddy with happiness, she looked over his shoulder. “What about breakfast?”
“I’ll make you another. After.”
Chapter Twenty-six
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