by Debbie Mason
Vivi, who loved him. A woman who, if he said the word, would stick by him until he worked through his grief and his guilt. Accept whatever he had left to give her. But he hadn’t said a word. And now he’d probably lost her for good. He didn’t want to lose her. He liked being with her. She made him feel alive again, like there was something worth living for.
Dragging the sparkly floral suitcase behind her, she walked into the open space wearing a white shirt tied at her waist, a pair of frayed denim shorts, and flip-flops. Her white lacy bra and the curve of her breasts were visible through the water marks left by her long, damp hair. Another reminder of what he stood to lose if he let her walk out of his life. He’d never get to kiss her beautiful face again, touch her smooth skin, or bury himself in her gorgeous body.
A dull ache expanded in his chest. Just thinking of Vivi that way made him feel disloyal to Kate—his golden girl. His first and only love. No, he hadn’t been a monk these past five years. Far from it. Only with Vivi, it wasn’t just about sex, and that was the problem. He didn’t know if he could fix it. Didn’t know if he wanted to.
“Hey.” Vivi lifted her chin. “Maddie’s picking me up after she drops Lily at baseball practice.”
“I would have dropped you off.”
“I didn’t want to put you out,” she said, doing her best to avoid looking at him as she hefted her carry-on over her shoulder.
“You wouldn’t be putting me out. I have to go into town anyway.” He didn’t add that he needed to pick up mousetraps. Though he guessed it didn’t matter if he told her that now. She wouldn’t be here.
“I’ll see you around,” she said, heading toward the mudroom. “Take care.”
“Wait, don’t go.” He didn’t want her to leave, not like this. She turned with an expectant look in her eyes. He tried to think of something to say to take away the sting of his rejection, to let her know how much he cared about her, how much she meant to him, but all that came out of his mouth was, “Madison won’t be here for a while. I’ll make you a cup of coffee. I’ve got bagels, too, if you want one.”
She tilted her head. “You got me bagels?”
Uncomfortable with the soft look that came over her face, he nodded and walked to the kitchen. He didn’t know what the big deal was. The woman loved her bagels. She hesitated, and for a minute, he didn’t think she’d stay. The band of tension across his shoulders loosened when she set her carry-on beside her suitcase on the floor.
He poured her coffee. “Quarter cup of cream and four sugars, just the way you like it.”
“Only when you make it, McBride. Thanks.” She wrapped both hands around the mug as she rested her hip against the counter and looked across the living room. “Pretty view. Any giant eels or sea creatures hanging out in there?”
Okay, this was more like it. They could do the friends thing, he thought, smiling as he put a couple of bagels in the toaster. “You’re a real city girl, aren’t you?”
“I’m all about self-preservation. I’ll take a mugger over a bear any day.”
She probably could, and would, take on a mugger. Which wasn’t the most comforting of thoughts. “So what’s on the agenda today? You girls have stuff to do for the wedding?” he asked, pulling a tub of cream cheese and a jar of strawberry jam from the refrigerator to set on the counter.
“Thanks,” she said when he handed her a bagel and a knife. “I have to check my list, but I think we’re picking up stuff for the bachelorette party tonight. What about you?”
“I’ve got some things to take care of around here before Dad’s bachelor party tonight.”
She glanced at him as she slathered cream cheese on her bagel. “You should hang out with your dad today.”
“He’s probably busy with Liz. I’ll see him at the Penalty Box tonight.” He watched expectantly as she bit into the bagel. “Not bad, huh?” For some inexplicable reason, he wanted her to like them as much as Bagel Bagel.
“Not as good as Bagel Bagel, but close.” She added another inch of cream cheese. “I’m sure Liz and your dad would love to hang out with you today. Why don’t you give him a call?”
“Like I said, I’ve got stuff to do and so do they.” He couldn’t take his eyes from her mouth, swallowing a groan when she swiped the tip of her tongue over her upper lip.
“Liz is worried you’re not happy about the wedding. Is she right?”
He dragged his gaze from her mouth. “My dad’s old enough to know what he wants. If he wants to get married, that’s his business.”
“You didn’t answer my question.”
“Leave it alone, Slick.” He snapped the lid on the cream cheese.
“If you can’t be happy for them, the least you can do is fake it.” She wiped her hands on her shorts and picked up her phone, sighing as she read a text.
“What’s up?”
She pressed her lips together. “Nell.”
“Don’t worry about my aunt. I’ll tell her we’re on a break, and she’ll leave you alone.”
“It’s taken care of.”
An uneasy feeling came over him when she wouldn’t look him in the eyes. “What do you mean?”
She shrugged. “We had an agreement, remember? I told Maddie and Skye that I broke it off. Obviously, Nell’s already heard the news.” She held up her phone as evidence.
“They won’t believe you.”
Her eyes narrowed. “Why wouldn’t they?”
“Because they know you’re in…” He stopped before he said “love with me.” He didn’t want to piss her off.
She flipped her hair over her shoulder and snorted. “Get over yourself. I have.”
“Less than an hour ago you told me you’re in love with me, and now you’re not?” The thought that she didn’t love him should make him happy. Oddly enough, it didn’t.
She ignored him, typing, he assumed, a response to Nell. Then she lifted her head and gave him a thin smile. “There, that takes care of that. Now no one will think I’m pining after you, McBride.”
“What did you do?”
A horn beeped. “There’s my ride. Thanks for the bagel and coffee.”
He followed behind her, flattening his palm on the door above her head. “Vivi, what did you do?”
She looked at him over her shoulder. “I let Nell fix me up with Dr. McSexy. We have a coffee date Monday at eleven. Now, if you don’t mind, I have things to do.”
Chapter Eight
I like your answers, but this one’s kind of mean, Auntie.” Lily looked up from Maddie’s iPad to give Vivi a disappointed glance.
Annie leaned across Vivi to look at the screen her sister held up. “Which one are you talking about?”
Lying between the two girls in Maddie’s bed, Vivi thumbed to the letter Lily referred to on her own iPad. It was one where she’d taken a kinder and gentler approach. She’d told Dumped in Duluth to stop jumping through hoops to make the men she dated happy and twirl one around her waist instead. Not a man, a hoop. “What do you think?” Vivi asked Annie. She trusted her opinion more than Lily’s. Lily was the more tenderhearted of the two.
“It’s kinda harsh. Maybe if you hadn’t listed all the dumb things she did first in caps with all the question marks, it would have been okay.”
Vivi sighed. Sounded like she needed to work a little harder on losing the kick-butt attitude. After her morning with Chance, that would take some effort. How many women had she advised over the last few months to never say the three words that were guaranteed to make a man run for the door? And Chance had already been halfway out of it when she’d said them. “Okay, from now on, I’m sending you guys my column to proofread first.”
“If you lived here, we could come over to your house and help you. Uncle Chance—” Lily began before Vivi cut her off.
“I love you guys, but I can’t move here. I have a good job in New York. And your uncle and I… we’re not dating anymore.” She’d known all along the charade with Chance would end up biting her in the but
t. Only it had turned out worse than she’d imagined.
“He said you’re on a break. That’s not the same thing as being broken up forever.”
Did he now? Maybe she should have stuck around when he’d arrived twenty minutes ago to pick up Gage for the bachelor party. She could have cleared up any misconceptions then, but she hadn’t been ready for another up-close-and-personal so soon after her humiliating morning. Using work as an excuse, she’d taken off for Maddie’s room before he’d made it through the front door. Annie and Lily hadn’t left her alone for long. Probably a good thing. She hadn’t had more than five minutes to wallow in self-pity.
“Lily—” Vivi began before Annie piped up beside her.
“Yes it does. Uncle Chance just said that so everyone would leave Aunt Vivi alone. I don’t know why you want her to date him anyway. You heard Dad. He was worried Uncle Chance would hurt her again. He’s still in love with—”
“Annie! That’s private. You’re going to make Auntie cry.”
“It’s okay, Lily. I—” Vivi began, giving Lily’s hand a comforting squeeze.
“I am not.” Annie shot Vivi a worried look. “I’m not, am I?”
“No, sweetie. Of course, you’re not. I’m fine. I have a date on Monday, you know.” She infused her voice with as much enthusiasm as she could muster while thinking she should probably thank Nell. Even though she was kind of worried what the older woman was up to. Because knowing Nell, she had to be up to something.
“Who with?” the girls asked in unison.
“Dr., um…” She racked her brain for his name. When she got nothing, she said, “McSexy.”
“Auntie, he’s got a name, you know,” Annie said, her thirteen-year-old voice infused with disapproval. “How would you like it if someone called you Vivi McSexy?”
Actually, she wouldn’t mind. Her ego could use a boost right about now. Having a man kick you out of his bed after one of the most incredible nights of your life was kind of demoralizing.
“I don’t think you should date Dr. Trainer,” Lily said.
She made a mental note of his last name. “Why? Don’t you like him?”
“Yes, but Auntie Skye said Uncle Chance’s eyes aren’t sad when he’s with you.” Lily’s chin quivered. “He lost his wife and his baby, and now he’s going to lose you, too.”
What was wrong with everyone? Couldn’t they keep their thoughts to themselves when the kids were in hearing distance? Vivi planned to have a conversation with her best friends before the night was over. “Sweetie, he—”
“All right, you guys, the guests are starting to arrive. I could use a hand putting out the…” Maddie, wearing skinny black pants and a black-and-white knit top, came into the room, her gaze moving over their faces. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing. Lily and Annie were critiquing this week’s column for me.” Vivi wondered if she had time to make the necessary changes to her response to Dumped in Duluth. It was amazing how that simple thought shifted her focus from her being a dumpee herself. Work had always been her salvation. Given all the times she’d buried herself in her job, she should be editor in chief by now. Though she’d be more than satisfied just to get her old position back. Something she should be worrying about instead of whether or not Lily repeated their conversation to her mother.
Toward that end, she put her arms around the girls, giving them both a noisy kiss. “You guys were a big help. Thanks for saving your aunt Vivi’s butt. What?” she said when the three of them stared at her.
“You sound a little manic. Are you okay?” Maddie asked.
Annie scowled at her sister. “Lily’s making her feel bad for ending it with Uncle Chance.”
“Am not.”
“Are so. You should be happy she broke up with him. Uncle Chance doesn’t care about anybody but himself. He’s been home two times in five years.” She shoved two fingers at her sister. “How do you think that made Grandpa and Dad feel? Now he’s being mean to Grandma Liz.”
“You’re a poopie head, Annie. It’s not his fault. His wife and baby died and broke his heart. He just needs someone to put it back together again. You could do it, Auntie. I know you could. You help people all the time.” Lily pointed at the iPad, her big brown eyes pleading and tear-filled.
Vivi wrapped her arms around her sweet, tenderhearted niece. If she had as much faith in her ability to heal Chance as Lily did, she might be willing to take another shot. “I wish I could, sweetie. I really do.”
Annie rubbed her sister’s arm. “I didn’t mean to make you sad.”
“It’s okay.” Lily sniffed.
Maddie sat on the edge of the bed beside Lily. “Honey, we all feel bad about what happened to Kate and baby Emma, but we can’t make Uncle Chance feel better. That’s something he has to do for himself. We just have to be there for him if he needs us.”
“Hey, girls, look who decided to join the party.” Skye came into the room with her five-month-old daughter Evie in her arms. They had on matching outfits: white pants, pink sweaters and pink ballet slippers. Skye’s wide smile faded. “Lily, what’s wrong?”
“I’m just sad.” Lily said, turning to give the baby a tremulous smile. She reached for Evie’s hand. Which the blonde cherub promptly stuck in her mouth. Lily giggled. “I think she’s hungry.”
“She better not be. I just fed her ten minutes ago.” Skye smiled. “Do you wanna come play with her in the living room?”
“That’s a great idea, isn’t it, Lily? Maybe Connor will wake up and they can play together,” Annie said, apparently looking for a way to distract her sister.
Obviously it worked because Lily jumped off the bed.
“Hey, you two. No waking up your brother. I just got him to sleep,” Maddie called after the girls.
Skye walked toward the door. “I’ll make sure they don’t. And I’ll be expecting you guys to fill me in. Don’t be long. Liz should be here any minute now.”
“We’ll be right out,” Maddie promised, flopping down on the bed when Skye shut the door behind her. “What brought that on?”
“Chance saying we’re on a break, I think. And you guys seem to forget there’s little ears in the house. They’ve overheard stuff they shouldn’t.”
“Really?” Maddie grimaced. “We’ll have to be more careful.” She took Vivi’s hand. “You did a good job of avoiding me today. I haven’t had a chance to ask if you’re all right. Are you sure you want to break up with him? He seems to want—”
She had to shut this down. “What you said to Lily is true, he’s not ready to move on. Who knows if he ever will be. It was easy to pretend in New York. It’s not so easy to do that here.” She hesitated, realizing that she veered too close to the truth. “The longer we were together, I realized I didn’t know him as well as I thought. He loves his cabin. And I don’t. Besides being sprayed by a skunk, last night I saw a bear and heard a wolf, and I swear to God the place is infested with rats that are bigger than that dog he loves. I hate dogs, and I hate the woods. And he’s moody and makes a horrible cup of coffee.”
“Vivi Westfield, you’ve been my best friend for ten years. Do you honestly think I can’t tell when you’re lying?”
“What? You don’t believe that’s he’s moody and makes horrible coffee?”
“No, I don’t believe that you dated him for six months without telling me and Skye.”
She rubbed her temple. “I told him you wouldn’t buy it. But everything else I said is true. This was good for me. I can move on now.”
“You sure about that?”
“Totally. And no more poor-Vivi looks from either you or Skye.”
“You’re going to tell her?”
“Yes, on the condition she doesn’t tell Ethan or anyone else. Same goes for you. Chance doesn’t want or need everyone fawning all over him, looking at him like he’s a step away from falling over the edge.”
“Is he?”
“Maybe. I don’t know. He’ll have to figure that out for himsel
f.”
“You’re being a little harsh, don’t you think?”
She shrugged. “I tried, Maddie. It didn’t work.”
“You’re protecting yourself from being hurt, you know that, right?”
“Probably. And I’m fine with that.”
“But what if it means that you’re giving up on the one man who will make you truly happy?”
“I don’t need a man to make me happy.”
“No, that honor goes to your job, doesn’t it?”
“So what if it does.”
“I love you, Vivi, but sometimes you can be a real hard-ass.”
Just like her grandmother. She would have been pleased as all get out to hear Vivi referred to as a hard-ass. As a young girl she may have wished that her grandmother had been less abrasive and more loving, but Vivi now appreciated the protective wall she’d taught her to build around her heart. “Let’s hope some of that rubs off on my niece. We’ve got to do something about Lily, Maddie. Toughen her up or something. She’s like this little empathetic sponge, soaking up everyone’s emotions.”
“Being sensitive and emotional doesn’t make you weak, Vivi.” Maddie angled her head, listening to the voices in the hall. “Nell’s here. We better get out there before she comes looking for us.”
* * *
An hour into Liz’s shower, Vivi was cured of any secret wedding desires she may have harbored. She’d never thought of herself as the marrying kind until she’d met Chance. The man had a way of putting dreams in her head that had no business being there. As he’d proven this morning. So she supposed she should be grateful the newlywed game they’d played earlier had squashed any thoughts of white weddings that may have been lurking in her subconscious.
