It may be gentler, but there’s nothing gentle about the emotions that this is bringing out of her. Hell, out of the both of us.
“Oh fuck . . .” I moan out as I move inside of her, feeling her bare. It’s almost too much to handle. “You’re so wet for me, baby. I love feeling you this way.”
Her fingers dig into my back and her legs squeeze my ass as I push in as deep as I can go and stop. “Me too,” she breathes. “Oh my God you feel so good. Keep moving for me.”
This must be what making love feels like. Holy fuck. It’s better than any rough night of sex that I’ve ever had.
I’ll take this every damn night if I can have it with her.
I feel myself getting close to release, so I wrap my hands into her hair and whisper against her lips. “Can I come in you?”
She nods and then kisses me so hard and deep that I know she wants me to just as badly as I want to.
I pull her up so that she’s straddling my lap, my hands tugging at her hair as she rides me slow and deep, until I’m filling her with my come.
A few seconds later, her grip on me tightens as she clenches around my cock, moaning against my mouth as her whole body shakes with pleasure.
“Holy shit, Styx.” She breathes. “I honestly didn’t think that sex with you could get any better . . . but it just did. You’re amazing.”
I kiss her and hold her against me, feeling our hearts beat together.
After we have both caught our breath, I clean us up and then pull the blanket from the back of the couch, covering us up with her in my arms.
Holy shit. I think I’m screwed after this. There’s no way I’m letting another man ever be inside her this way . . .
Meadow
AFTER STYX SHOWED ME AN incredibly amazing night, I fell asleep in his arms, laying under the stars in the gazebo.
It was peaceful and beautiful. Nothing else mattered in that moment except my heart beating against his as he held me to his chest, making it seem that he couldn’t get me close enough.
Going home this morning sucked and truthfully made me wish that we had the whole day free to just lounge around and hold each other.
But he had to go to the gym for most of the afternoon so he dropped me off at home, leaving my whole body aching for his touch, impatient to see him again tonight.
I’ve spent most of my morning now, trying to talk one of the other nurses into covering my shift so that I can make it to his mother’s dinner tonight to repay him for everything he’s done for me.
After two hours on the damn phone and promising Dani that I’ll work a double tomorrow, I’m finally free today.
And I’ve spent every last second since hanging up that phone reliving last night and trying to figure out what is happening between Styx and I.
A month ago if you would’ve asked me if I was ready for a serious relationship, I would’ve said no. I was scared. Terrified of getting used to being with someone and loving them just to possibly end up alone again. I’ve lost too much and the pain is still unbearable at times.
I’m still afraid, but truthfully all I want to do is spend my time with Styx.
I get that Styx doesn’t open up much to others. I get that he’s not typically the romantic, serious relationship type guy, but he makes me feel that for me- he would be. And I love that. It gives me hope that things could be more than I expected.
Mandy has been watching me try on outfits for the last hour now, but I can’t seem to find one that I’m completely satisfied with. What a way to spend her night off.
“The last three outfits looked good. What are you so worried about?” she asks as she watches from her seat on my bed. “He invited you home to meet his mother. From what I’ve heard about this guy, I doubt he cares what you’re wearing. He’ll just be happy to have you there.”
“Yeah.” I turn away from the mirror to face her. “I know. But just knowing that I’m the first woman he’s invited to dinner with his mother . . . You get it. I just want to look nice. For her.”
Mandy smiles at me. “I’ve never seen you like this over a man before, Meadow. It makes me happy because you deserve to feel this. You deserve someone who will give to you as much as you do to others. You’re a good person.”
She stands up and fixes the back of my black blouse. “I know you’ve lost a lot. But please try not to let that discourage you from getting close with Styx. I know it has in the past. But honestly . . . none of those men seemed to be worth it. Especially not Jase.”
A tear falls from my eye and I laugh, wiping it away. No one has really mentioned that they think I give a lot. Not since my aunt has passed at least. She used to remind me that all the time when it came to guys.
“Especially not that ass. He was never more than just something to pass the time and I was the same to him.”
“Are you sure about that?” she asks as I’m throwing my hair up.
“Why do you ask that? Of course that’s all he was for me.”
“I meant for him. He’s been acting strange ever since you and Styx started dating. He’s been very moody and almost lost in his own little world most of the time. It’s weird. He hasn’t even been sleeping around with the other nurses. Weird. I hate this Jase even more.”
I sit down on the edge of my bed and slip my black heeled boots on, tucking the legs of my skinny jeans inside. “Doesn’t matter. Jase is in the past. So let’s not talk about him anymore. Especially when I’m about to see Styx. He’ll be here any minute.”
She reaches for her purse and walks past the mirror, giving herself a quick glance. “Tell me all about dinner later, okay. I want to know how it goes. Jameson is waiting for me so I should go.”
Smiling, I give her a quick hug and then walk her to the door. “Have fun on your date, babe. And don’t think that I won’t be asking for details later. Details for details. Sounds like a fair exchange.”
“You got it.” She winks and jogs down the porch steps as Styx pulls up on his motorcycle. “Holy hell . . . he’s hot on a motorcycle.” Giving me the thumbs up, she turns away and walks past Styx, waving before she jumps into her car.
“Hell yeah he is,” I whisper to myself, while looking him over on his bike.
I swear a man has never made a leather jacket look so damn good. It’s my favorite thing of his that he wears.
After I quickly lock my door, I turn around and watch as he pulls his helmet off and walks toward me.
Even his walk is extremely sexy and full of confidence and the thought that this guy was inside of me without a condom last night has me fanning myself off with my purse.
I think I’m going to overheat. Especially if he keeps looking at me with those sexy blue eyes the way that he is.
As if he’s about to tie me up and devour me.
“Come here,” he says, while pulling me against him. “Holy fuck, I’ve missed you all day.”
His hands grip the back of my hair and before I know it, his lips crash against mine, taking my damn breath away.
The way his tongue moves against mine, his soft lips all over my lips as if he owns them. This kiss is different than the rest. Deeper and more meaningful somehow.
Or maybe it’s just my imagination.
He pulls away from our kiss, placing his forehead against mine. “You ready to meet my mother?”
I can tell from the look in his eyes that he’s worried about bringing me to his mother’s house. I’m not sure what to think about that. Maybe I was right to worry about what to wear.
“Are you sure you want me to go? I don’t have to . . .”
He kisses me again, but harder this time, backing me up against the door and pinning me in with his body. “Fuck yes I do. Don’t ever question that again. It’s not you.”
I look up to meet his gaze. “Tell me why you’re nervous.”
His eyes close and he lets out a deep breath, speaking with our foreheads still pressed together. “My asshole father will be there and there’s a lot of things that you
don’t know about him. He’s hurt both me and my mother a lot.”
I reach up and cup his face, my heart breaking as I look into his eyes. “I’m sorry that he’s ever hurt you or your mother. I hate hearing that with everything in me. I know you said he was an asshole . . .”
“He’s a piece of shit. The biggest asshole that I know and honestly he doesn’t even deserve to be in the same room with you, but I’m doing this for my mother.”
Standing up on my tippy toes, I press my lips to his, talking against them. “He doesn’t deserve a son like you. You’re so far from being an asshole. You’re the best person I know. So let’s just go and prove to him that you’re the bigger person. Let’s not worry. Okay? I’m here for you.”
He nods his head and breathes against my lips. “And I love you for that.”
“Fuck,” he whispers afterwards and turns away in a hurry, grabbing my hand to walk me down to his bike. “Let’s go.”
I try to focus on jumping on the back of his motorcycle and wrapping my arms around him, but all my mind is on is the fact that the word love just came from his lips. Even if it wasn’t in the I love you way.
It has my heart racing and my whole body feeling weak.
This man has much more of me than I thought. He has my fucking heart. All of it and I hope like hell that he doesn’t rip it from my chest.
When we pull up at his parents’ house, his whole body stiffens as he stares at the empty driveway.
“Everything alright?” I ask in his ear. “Is anyone here?”
He turns off the engine, but doesn’t make a move to get off his bike. “Yeah, my mother’s here. My father isn’t.”
I smile and rub his shoulders. “That’s a good thing then, right? Maybe he’ll miss dinner and you won’t have to-”
“It’s not a good thing,” he growls, while helping me off the back of his bike. “Trust me. It’s far from good.”
Grabbing my hand, he gives me a quick kiss on the lips, before walking me to the house and pushing the door open.
“We’re here, mom.”
A beautiful woman about my height comes running from the kitchen, excitedly pulling her blonde hair from her face and pinning it back. “Oh. My.”
She stops in front of me and looks me over, before pulling my hand from Styx’s and enclosing it in hers. “Meadow is beautiful.” I laugh nervously as she spins me around and then hugs me. “You’re perfect for my son. Just think of the beautiful babies ya’ll would have.”
“Seriously?” Styx says, sounding embarrassed. “Let’s not talk about kids when she’s barely been mine for a month. Shit, mom.”
“So she is yours?” she questions, looking as if she got the information a lot easier than she expected. Grinning, she throws her arms around me and whispers, “You’re the first woman he’s ever called his. You’re special to him and that makes you very special to me.”
“Alright. Alright. Try not to scare Meadow away before she even makes it to the kitchen table to fucking eat. Now where’s Frank?”
His mom smiles even bigger and then kisses him on the forehead. “Love you, baby,” she says, ignoring his question. “Now let’s go eat.”
Styx grabs my hand as his mom rushes back into the kitchen as if to avoid any further talk of his father. “My mother’s a little excited about tonight. So ignore some of the things she says. She’s not used to me bringing women around.”
I smile and squeeze his hand, excited to get to experience this. “I love her. She’s so cute. I love that she’s excited so let’s try to forget about your father and enjoy this time with her. I want her to be happy. I want to see you both smiling tonight.”
I give him a quick kiss and then head to the kitchen to help his mother.
Styx follows shortly behind, going straight to the dishes to help set the table.
“Meadow, sweetie.” His mother turns to look at me, while shoving a piece of hamburger meat in her mouth. “Would you mind grabbing the cheese from the bottom drawer in the fridge? I forgot to get it out. Everything is set after that!”
“No problem,” I say, returning her smile. “Thanks for having me for dinner. It smells delicious in here.”
She laughs. “I learned from my son. I was a lousy cook when he was a kid and none of my food had any flavor.”
I catch Styx laughing as he finishes setting up the table. “That’s true. I used to go weeks skipping dinner just so I wouldn’t have to eat her cooking.”
“Hey!” His mother throws a taco shell at him. “That’s a lie. You make it sound as if I fed you dog food as a kid.” She winks. “It was cat food.”
I can’t help but to laugh as we all sit down and start making our tacos.
I can definitely see where Styx gets his personality from.
After dinner, we spend the next hour at the table eating snacks and playing cards, listening to stories about when Styx was a teen.
A smile hasn’t left our faces since we sat down and I have to admit that this is the best family dinner I’ve had since I was a kid.
I’ve forgotten what it was like to have a family. I’m glad that Styx has one and that he has the choice to still experience these moments.
There’s just one thing that’s been bothering me.
Every few minutes, I catch Styx looking toward the living room with a worried expression as if he’s waiting for his father to show up at any minute.
I just wish I knew a way to take his worry away. But I don’t and I hate it . . .
Styx
I’M TRYING MY BEST TO enjoy the night with the two most important people in my life, but I can’t stop thinking about that asshole and when he’s going to show up and ruin everything.
He’s going to be here any damn second. I can feel it in my fucking bones and I will do everything in my power to protect the both of them. Nothing about this night is going to end well and I’m already hating that I’ve put Meadow in this position.
I stare hard. Waiting . . .
Come on, motherfucker and get it over with.
“Styx!” My mother laughs and tosses a card at me to get my attention. It’s about the fifth time that she’s had to yell at me since the game started. I’m trying hard to just be in the moment, but I can’t. Fuck, it’s hard to concentrate right now. “It’s your turn again. Go! Don’t keep us ladies waiting all night. That’s rude.”
“Sorry. I was just . . .” I pull my eyes away from the living room and get ready to toss a card down to play, when the front door bursts open, causing everyone at the table to jump in surprise. Myself included and I fucking hate my body for reacting this way.
I spent my whole childhood fearing this man, but not anymore. He will never get the pleasure of seeing fear in my eyes again. I will die before that day happens.
“Oh fuck,” my mom whispers, while panicking to push all of the cards into a pile.
Meadow must see the worry on her face, so she jumps to her feet and starts gathering cards too, without question. “Let me help you.” She places her hands on my mother’s as she continues to reach out with shaky hands. “I got it. It’s okay.”
Jumping to my feet, I stand straight, cracking my neck as I watch the drunken bastard enter the kitchen and stop.
Yeah, you want to stand there looking like an ass as if you didn’t know we would be here. You want to play this shit so you have an excuse to be angry.
Keeping my eyes on him, I watch as he tilts back the rest of what’s left of his beer and then tosses the empty bottle in the sink.
“What the fuck is this shit, Lily?” He grips the sink, before punching the counter and then turning around to face us. “You didn’t tell me we’d have guests. I would’ve made sure to come home right after work.”
My mother looks from Meadow to me and shakes her head apologetically. “I told you yesterday, remember? I mentioned going to buy stuff for tacos . . .”
“The fuck you did,” he shouts, while picking up the closest thing to him and throwing it across th
e room. His jaw clenches as his eyes land on the cards that Meadow is shoving into the box. “You fucking play cards without me, Lily? Get over here. Now.”
“Fuck you,” I growl out, while blocking my mother from his view. He won’t live to hurt her again if he makes any move to touch her. “She doesn’t have to come to you. Don’t ever fucking talk to her like that again. You need to leave.”
“I need to leave?” He points at his chest and laughs his asshole fucking laugh that he always does. As if he’s so damn untouchable. Not anymore. “This is my house. I pay the bills. No one tells me what to do in my own home. Not even your bitch of a mother.”
“Woah! Don’t talk like that about her. What is your problem?” Meadow speaks up, causing my father to look at her for what must be the first time since he’s walked in the door.
I instantly stiffen up at even the idea of his eyes on her. They’re dark and full of whatever evil resides inside his fucked up mind.
“Who the fuck is this little bitch in my house?” His hand slips from the counter, him nearly falling down, but he somehow manages to catch himself first. “Dammit, Lily. I’m going to beat your ass for making me look like a fool. Come. Here. Now.”
In a rage, he pushes me to the side to get at my mother, but I grab him by his neck, slamming him into the sink. “You will never talk to my mother or girlfriend with that disrespect again. I will cut your fucking tongue from your mouth. Got it?” I look over my shoulder at Meadow, while preventing my father from moving. “I need you both outside. Now. Take my mom. Don’t let her back in no matter what she says.”
Meadow nods her head and shoots to her feet.
“Don’t you dare fucking go outside, Lily. You will stay right there until I say so. This asshole won’t touch me with you around to see it and as soon as he gets the fuck out of the way, you’re mine. Stay,” he demands.
Feeling the rage take over, I toss him down onto the kitchen floor and grab him by the throat, squeezing so hard that he starts coughing. “Let’s see you try to touch her now, you piece of shit.” I elbow him in the face as he attempts to push me away. “Go ahead. Hurt her! Do it motherfucker. Get past me now. Let me see you try. Put your hands on her like you have since I was ten. Make her scream and cry, balled up on the floor trying to protect herself. Go ahead!”
Walk of Shame Page 67
