She stared into his eyes. The sunlight dancing off the grey, revealing flecks of black. She swallowed.
His fingers teased the outside of her breasts and then cupped them in each hand. She thrust them further into his palms, willing him to touch her nipples. He chuckled and shook his head. She pouted and then whimpered in protest when he removed his hands. “Please,” she pleaded, “touch me, touch my breasts.”
“I’ve waited five years, Katie, five long years.”
“And you think I haven’t,” she shot back trying to sit up. He gripped her tighter with his knees. “I haven’t been with any—” Her hand flew to her mouth.
He arched an eyebrow and leaned close to her face. “You haven’t been with anyone in five years?”
She glared at him. Damn him, he was laughing at her. “Yes,” she hissed, as she crossed her arms, covering her bare breasts. “Happy now? I’m a freak, a total freak.” She twisted beneath him. “Now stop laughing at me and get off me. I’m getting cold.”
He leaned forward to hover above her as he braced his hands on either side of her head. He whispered in her ear, “I’m not laughing at you. I’m savoring this moment. I’ve waited a long time.” He nipped her lobe. He kissed her skin in the hollow of her neck before he moved back to her ear and suckled her lobe. She arched her body as he applied pressure. “I’m feeling rather smug that no other man could satisfy you.” He dragged his tongue from behind her ear and onto her neck before leaving a trail of kisses and moving his mouth up to hers. “Tell me that’s why you’ve haven’t had another lover.” She shook her head. He nipped her bottom lip. “Tell me, Katie,” he growled as he pulled his mouth away and leaned back.
She reached up, uncovering her chest, and laced her arms around his neck. She dropped her gaze to his mouth then lifted it back to his eyes. “Yes,” she whispered, “satisfied?”
He pulled her hands from his neck and held her wrists in one hand. He shifted his body forward then laid her hands above her head. With his free hand he cupped her breast, brushing his thumb ever-so-lightly across her aching tip. She arched her back, thrusting into his hand, and moaned. He lowered his mouth and replaced his thumb. “Oh, God,” she mewled. “More. I need more of you.”
“I’m not going anywhere,” he said, his voice low and husky.
His fingers caressed the creamy soft skin in the valley between her breasts. He was carefully avoiding her nipples. She twisted beneath him, trying to free her hands. She needed to feel his mouth on her nipples, to relieve the ache. His tongue laved over the top of her left breast and then her right. “Please,” she moaned.
He shook his head. “I’m in control, KitKat.”
He was right. Her body was held captive beneath him, his knees allowing no movement. Her hands, held snugly in his left hand, were firmly restrained. She was at his mercy. She was his to do with as he pleased. She was shocked as she admitted she wanted this, wanted him to take charge.
His forefinger traced a lazy path down her midriff. She shivered involuntarily when he splayed his hand across her abdomen. “Alec…” He released the button of her jeans then pulled the zipper down. In a flash he released her hands and yanked her jeans and lace panties down and off, adding them to the growing pile of clothes.
He stood, towering over her. As he rapidly discarded his clothes, his eyes roved over her body like a starving man facing a smorgasbord. His eyes narrowed, the grey darkening.
She raised her upper body, leaning the weight on her elbows. Her eyes feasted on his flesh. He was even more gorgeous than she remembered. His chest was covered by dark hair. Her fingers twitched in anticipation of wrapping themselves in the silky softness. Her eyes traveled down his body, following the trail of his hair. She had to stop from laughing. It was like following a map that would lead to treasure. The only thing missing was X to mark the—she gasped as her eyes were drawn to his erect member, like a moth to a flame. She didn’t remember him being that big.
He chuckled and straddled her. Leaning forward, his body slowly, torturously made contact with her skin, inch by inch. She felt his cock twitch as it pressed into her abdomen. She leaned forward, snaking her hands around his neck, and pulled him down onto her. Her breasts ached, waiting for his touch. As his chest hair tickled her nipples, she thought she’d scream in frustration. As if he sensed her torment, his hands cupped her breasts, gently kneading the mounds. His tongue swept over one nipple and then the other. She arched her breasts into him, trying not to lose contact with his mouth.
Her breath was ragged. “Alec, it’s been so long. Please, we can take it slow next time.”
He raised his head. “Next time? You won’t disappear in the pre-dawn light?” he teased.
“No…I promise. Just, just …”
“Tell me, Katie. Tell me what you want.”
“I need you inside me. Now.” She writhed beneath him, showing him how urgently she needed to feel him in her body.
He nestled his member between her parted legs, aligning himself with her opening. He pressed into her slowly, allowing her body to adjust to his. He slid in deeper and deeper, finally seating himself fully inside. He stilled a moment and then started to move, reawakening her body to his. She arched her back, urging him to take her completely, body and soul.
****
As the sun slipped low, hovering near the western horizon, the wind began to pick up. Katie shivered even though she was wrapped in his arms. She tilted her head back. “Um, it’s getting colder. I need to get dressed.”
Alec bent his head and placed a kiss on her forehead. “Right.” He released her and got dressed. He brought her clothes over and helped her get back into hers.
“I think that’s a first,” he said.
“What?” she asked. “Making love out in the open?”
He shook his head. “No, helping a woman get dressed.”
She re-packed the hamper and sat back down on the blanket, facing east.
“Why are you facing that way?” he asked.
“We have to watch the first stars appear,” she said softly. “Star light, star bright.”
“How long until they appear?”
“Actually,” she replied, “they’re always there. We just can’t see them until the sunlight has gone.”
“Okay, but how long?” he asked as he nuzzled her head.
“Know what my favorite movie is?”
He ruffled her hair. “I want to learn all about you, Katie. So tell me, sweetheart.”
“Contact. I could sit here all night and watch the sky, wishing myself into the cosmos. So much to discover.” She sighed wistfully. “So much unknown, just waiting to be revealed.” She leaned her head back. “You’re too impatient, Alec. You give up too easily. It’s that digger in you. Either there’s something in the dirt or there isn’t. There’s no wonder in it.”
“Digger? What the hell is a digger? You’ve used that term several times and I can tell from your tone that it’s not a compliment.”
Katie sighed. “I’m sorry but it’s my rather derogatory term for people like you, impulsive archaeologists.”
“What the hell happened to you to make you feel that way?” Alec looked down at her, before he joined her on the ground. He captured her hands and held them in his.
“Ever since those Indiana Jones movies came out, you’re all out there looking for treasures, ignoring research and excavation protocols. It’s your…” She hesitated and then corrected herself, “Our generation that throws caution to the wind.”
“I wanted to be an archaeologist since I was a little kid, Katie, and that, I’m loath to admit, was long before I ever heard of Indiana Jones.” He squeezed her hands. “What happened? I would have thought being an investigative mythologist would have you teaming up with archaeologists. Something happened. What was it?” he pressed, holding her tight to his chest.
“It’s history, Alec. I can’t turn back the clock so let’s not look backward? Look,” she said as she pointed to the eastern
sky, “the first star. Star light, star bright, the first star I see tonight,” she began.
“And just what are you wishing for?” he whispered against her ear.
Katie shrugged. “Doesn’t matter. They never come true.”
He cupped her cheek with his right hand, turning her head tenderly, bending his head down, his mouth barely an inch from hers. “I know you don’t really believe that. Tell me.”
He smelled so good, tasted so good, felt so good. She arched her back and shifted in his lap. Slowly she pulled back, breaking contact with his chest. “No. I-I just can’t. I can’t relive that… that nightmare.”
“But you do and frequently. Share it with me and maybe the pain will go away.”
Katie swallowed. “Didn’t know you were a shrink too.” She wanted to wrap herself in his arms and shut out the world, the pain. She wanted to stay in this moment forever, with him. It slowly dawned on her that she was falling in love with him.
She leaned into his chest and took a deep breath. “Ever since you came back into my life, you’ve… you’ve caused me to…”
“Deal with feelings, issues you’d rather suppress?” Alec said.
“That’s not fair. My life has been responsible, rewarding.”
He tucked a curl behind her ear and leaned his forehead against her head. “I think a better word would be controllable. You control how much, or how little you want to experience in life. You put me down for being a digger but at least I get out in the world. You live your life as if it were a lab experiment. You control all the variables.”
“You have no idea what my life is like,” Katie said, feeling her whole body tense. She didn’t want to have this conversation, but on a deeper level needed to.
“Actually, I do have some idea. You live as if it’s you versus the world. You constantly have to prove yourself to your own worst enemy.”
“Lucy Millar?”
“No, Katie. Your greatest enemy is you,” Alec said.
She gasped.
“You keep yourself locked up behind your self-erected walls.” He turned her head and locked his eyes on hers in the dim twilight. “Where is my, KitKat, the wonderful warm, sensuous woman I met five years ago? The one who peeked out last night and again just now when we made love.”
She turned her head away from him, trying to quell the tears filling her eyes. Why couldn’t he just drop it, like everyone else did when they knew she didn’t want to talk about it? Why wouldn’t he just stop pushing her into dark corners? “She doesn’t exist,” she replied, her voice almost a whisper. “She’s a figment, a will-o-the wisp, an illusion.”
“I’ll tell you something,” Alec said as he stroked her arm. “You can run from people and relationships forever, but it won’t help. You can’t escape yourself as much as you want to. You can’t escape Katie Walsh, but you can learn to live with her, learn to let her live, be the person she was meant to be.”
Katie shifted, straightening her body, pulling her arm tight into her body, away from his hand. “You think just because you’ve slept with me a few times that you know me, but you don’t. I freely admit that I’m a complicated person, Alec. I can’t be someone I’m not just because you want me to.”
“I agree you’re very complicated, hard to get to know, but I want to get to know you. From the moment I saw you last week, when I came crashing back into your life, I knew I couldn’t walk back out. As little time as we’ve spent together, I probably know more about you than people you’ve known for years do. Hell, you’ve known Robert for years and he doesn’t know the real Katie, does he?”
She hesitated, the silence palpable. “No,” she whispered, a single tear sliding down her cheek. “The real Katie died ten years ago.”
“I don’t believe that, not for one second. The real Katie is buried behind walls, but I don’t believe she’s dead,” Alec said as he reached to brush her tear away with his thumb.
She rose, needing to distance herself from this conversation and him. She walked backed towards the manor house.
In a few short steps he caught up to her, gently grabbing her by the shoulders, turning her to face him. “Katie? Talk to me. Tell me what happened,” he ordered softly.
The images churned in her mind, quickly rising to the surface. There was no pushing them away, no forgetting them now. Images she buried deep, never to see the light of day in her lifetime, were swimming in her conscious mind. Life-altering memories began to pulse into her blood, awaken her senses. Her breath caught. Maybe talking about it would help with the nightmares, help her laugh again. “It’s so, so hard. I’ve never told anyone.” She raised her eyes, seeking his in the rising moonlight. “You know I used to laugh a lot before… before he killed them.”
Alec inhaled sharply and brushed her bangs off her face. “I can believe that. I caught glimpses of it that night and again these last few days. Tell me, Katie, tell me what happened, why you built the fortress.”
Katie sank to her knees, knowing her legs wouldn’t support her much longer. He knelt down beside her. Her chest rose as she inhaled. “It was summertime. I was working on my master’s degree and was taking a two month break until the fall semester started. My parents were just starting on this new dig site in the mountains of Peru. They asked me to come down to visit, to help if I wanted to stay for a month or two. It had been quite a while since I’d been with them, so I agreed. I didn’t really care about what they assigned me to work on. I just wanted to see them again.”
“Were they archaeologists?” Alec asked.
“Yes, and damn good ones. They followed protocols, refused to put lives at risk. Perhaps you’ve heard of them, Anna and Lincoln Walsh?”
Alec nodded in recognition. “Yes. I met your parents at several conferences. Your mother had flaming red hair and blue-green eyes.” He laughed softly. “That helps to explain you.”
“Yes, one eye was blue and the other was green. But how does that explain me?”
“Your father called her his ‘wildcat,’ said she wasn’t afraid of anything or anyone. And she was this tiny…”
“Excuse me?” she interrupted.
“Sorry.” Alec smiled. “She was petite, maybe an inch or so taller than you. He also told me about the other woman in his life, called her ‘Little One,’ said she was just like her mother.” He looked at her, recognition lighting up his face. “That’s why you don’t like it when people call you that, why Robert warned me not to call you that. It has nothing to do with your height. That was your Dad’s name for you.”
“Yes,” she whispered, her eyes filling with tears. “Yes.”
“It sounds like you were close to them.”
“I was,” Katie said, tears threatening to flood her eyes and her senses. “But with my studies and their work, we hadn’t seen each other for a few years.” She inhaled deeply and exhaled slowly. “So I went about and secured the proper paperwork that would allow me to stay and volunteer my services at the dig site. And then I headed south.” He gently coaxed her over to his lap, her back to his chest. She stared at the star-filled sky, the moon lighting the inky canvas, waiting for the show to begin. It was all starting to play out in front of her, as if she were there. He placed his hand at the back of her neck, massaging her nape in slow circles. She dipped her head lower.
“I landed in Lima but I missed my connecting flight and spent the night there before flying out to Cuzco the next afternoon. When I got to Cuzco, I checked into the hotel my parents had reserved. There was a message from them telling me to call a number and that someone would arrive the next morning to take me to them. They were planning a small celebration at the site to welcome me. They were so excited and so was I.” She exhaled loudly. “So I called the number and, after a restless night, found Pedro waiting for me in the lobby the next morning. He stowed my bag in the back of a Jeep that was in the twilight of its existence and we headed slowly up into the mountains.
“We entered the camp site at dusk, a day later than I was
to have originally arrived. It was clear that something was wrong, very wrong.” Her body tensed. “I remember there was a lot of commotion, a lot of yelling,” Katie said as she stared into space. ”I don’t speak Spanish, so I had no idea what the yelling was about. I went looking around for my parents. I found their tent but there were some uniformed police or military, maybe both, in there.” She shrugged. “I didn’t know who they were. I asked if anyone spoke English, but they just looked at me. I think it was at that point that I knew something had happened to my folks. I remember a shiver passing through my body. The kind my mother would say, ‘someone just walked over my grave.’ I left the tent and followed people, not sure where they were going, but at least I wasn’t sitting around waiting. As we headed out of the camp, we heard a helicopter coming in for a landing. I stopped along with everyone else and waited.” She wrapped her arms tightly around her torso to ward off the chill spreading through her body.
“It was a military helicopter, but the man who got out was American. I found out later that he was from the American embassy. The men who had been in my parents’ tent motioned for him to join them. I headed back to the tent to find out what was going on. As I approached, they were talking and gesturing in what I would say was a heated exchange, but it was all in Spanish. I walked in and yelled to get their attention. The American asked who I was. I told him and he gestured for me to follow him outside. We walked to the outskirts of the camp, away from the commotion.” She stopped, staring at the rising moon.
“Katie,” Alec asked softly, “can you continue? Why was the embassy official there?”
Her chest rose and fell several times before she continued. “That’s what I asked him. I said it’s not normal for an embassy official to be there on a routine dig, much less arrive in a non-US military helicopter.” Her voice caught. “H… he told me there had been an accident, a cave-in at the excavation site. It had happened that morning, just after dawn. Attempts were being made to rescue people, but it was more likely it would be a recovery mission rather than a rescue. He said he was sorry. I remember my legs collapsing and ending up on the ground.” She pulled her knees up, wrapping her arms around them as she laid her head on her knees.
Trove (The Katie Walsh Mysteries) Page 17
