At first it’s only one glowing bubble, but then more spheres swoop up into the indigo sky, just a quick flash before they dive back into the trees like a brief swarm of bees.
“Oh my god, did you see that?” I point with a trembling finger. I know immediately that I’m witnessing something exotic and exciting—and also terrifying. “There are so many of them!”
“I told you. They’re curious, but scared,” Jonathan says.
Mayet gracefully materializes, fluttering her wings and looking at me expectantly with those wide eyes.
“Of me?” I ask. But he doesn’t need to answer, it’s written all over Mayet’s face.
“Keira, follow me.”
A creeping shiver ripples through me. The fairy’s voice sounds too familiar, like the wind chimes that hung outside my bedroom window back in Destin.
“They’re not afraid of you, they’re afraid of the hunters. SEEK’s in there. We should wait, but you’re already paler than you were an hour ago.”
“I’m fine,” I say, irrevocably bewildered by his distinction that I am somehow different from the other SEEK hunters. I’m not.
“I believe you. No judgment. You’re the victim here.” He slips down the hill behind me, grasping at branches to slow himself.
I scamper through the familiar underbrush. I get that Jonathan’s trying to make me feel better, but nothing can stop me from feeling dreadful right now. There’s nothing anyone could say right now that would ease my guilt. And certainly not the guy who’s making me want him just by existing. It wasn’t my intention to be a heartless murderer when I pledged my oath of servitude to SEEK. I thought I was fighting for something worth believing in. I thought I was helping the country, not just Lindy.
“Let’s not talk. I need to concentrate.” I say, kicking up dirt as I scurry down the fern-covered hill, chasing after his fairy.
Jonathan trips, trying to keep up.
I duck under the canopy, sick roiling in my stomach. This forest is now my own personal hell. A graveyard of all the Khayal I alone have murdered. If they are what they appear to be, truly kind and innocent—I swallow hard, choking on one thought—then I am wicked.
Consumed by a haze of remorse I almost miss the distinct pounding of gunfire in the distance. “Hunters,” I growl and stalk toward the sound.
“Not that way.” Mayet flutters in front of me, shaking her head wearily. “Your Ka is over here.”
I take an uncertain step toward her, keeping my eyes trained on hers. “You know where my Khayal is?” I ask, surprising myself with a degree of excitement.
“Irkalla is there.” Mayet flashes her green teeth and points a slender finger north. “She’s hiding, waiting for you.”
A 10mm peppers shots again, still a few miles from here. I turn to Jonathan, “Is she being hunted?”
“They’re always being hunted.” He nods, still holding the Glock like a dirty diaper rather than a weapon. “Just the way it is.”
Something deep inside me begins to uncoil, like a copper wire springing loose from its pipe. The gunfire and the rest of the Boone melt into the background. The only thing left in my vision is the path to my Khayal, the only sound the faint fluttering of Mayet’s graceful wings and Jonathan’s breathing behind me.
It’s a novel feeling, being focused on finding a Khayal for this reason. I listen intently for familiar sounds, but sneaking through a dense wood in thick underbrush proves to be a bigger challenge with Jonathan in tow. He’s as graceful as an elephant prancing on bubble wrap.
“Do you want to die?” I glare behind me, his big feet tripping on yet another log.
“I’m nervous,” he whispers. “This is not my area of expertise.”
“You’re nervous? I’m the one risking everything by trusting you. You’ve got Mayet. If this fairy thing doesn’t work, I’ll lose—” I bite down on the words Lindy’s only chance to walk again before they become a reality. “Just watch where you’re going.”
It doesn’t seem to matter which way I turn, I feel no Khayal. It’s as if I’m senseless and blind at the same time. The only thing that’s even remotely the same is the quiet stillness as we duck into a small meadow surrounded by a coppice of sassafras trees.
“Keira, Irkalla is up there,” Mayet’s dainty arm directs me to a massive Blue Ash tree.
“I’m supposed to climb up there?” I gulp, tipping my head back to gawk at the tower of huge branches.
Mayet nods and I notice for the first time how truly sweet she is. A childlike innocence shines in her almond-shaped eyes.
“You’ll both be safer while you bond. I’ll stand guard,” Jonathan assures me, attempting to look competent with the Glock awkwardly clutched in his hands.
“Great. That makes me feel better.” I sigh; certain something’s bound to go wrong with this plan as I foist my foot onto a knot in the trunk. I hesitate, glancing back over my shoulder. “How exactly does this bonding thing work?”
“It’s not unpleasant.” Jonathan winks at me.
“Lovely.” I dig my sneaker deeper into the bark, swinging effortlessly up the first branches and climb steadily. Thirty feet above the forest’s floor, I find her, the most beautiful creature I’ve ever seen casually swinging one leg over a thick limb, her tiny back leaning against the knotty tree. She’s gorgeous, though she looks nothing like Mayet, except that she too is also green from the tip of her stunning head to tiny-toe. Her hair is wavy, light, faintly glowing, instead of the straight dark hair Mayet has. This fairy-girl is even smaller, daintier and smiling. I like her instantly.
“Hello, Keira,” she says in a voice like a harp. “I’m Irkalla.”
“Hi,” I say, straddling the scratchy branch in an attempt to appear relaxed in the presence of this angel.
There’s a moment of calm. I’m sure something is happening, something important, though neither of us breathes. We just look at each other, as though some part of me recognizes her despite my sense of uncertainty.
“How does this work? I mean…what do I do?” I mutter, pressure buzzing in my ears.
“I’m sorry I couldn’t bond with you sooner, but we weren’t alone. I wouldn’t have been able to save you if… don’t worry, it won’t hurt. Absorbing your soul is painless,” Irkalla says apologetically, her big eyes twinkling as though she’s saying something completely ordinary.
“What?” I gasp, jerking backward.
Irkalla’s tiny hands are surprising quick as she clasps my hand, keeping me steady. “Trust me, Keira. I chose you because I know your heart.” Her wise round eyes penetrate right through me as though seeing me from the inside out.
Inside my head there’s a faint thrumming sound, like a tiny hummingbird fluttering around in my most inner secrets. I bite my lip, wiggling against her shockingly strong grip, but she holds tight.
“I know why you came to SEEK,” she says softly, a note of acceptance in her delicate voice. “You haven’t come for vengeance or lust for death. You came for love.”
Irkalla’s voice trickles like water into my thirsty heart. I want so desperately to believe her that I lean toward her. Wings, twice as big as Irkalla, cloak around me like a mother bird cradling her young. “How can you want me? I’m a monster,” I sniffle, shaking off the numbness and letting the guilt consume me.
Irkalla’s cool fingers linger on my arm for a second, as though letting all the shame and remorse I’ve lived with for the past eighteen months fill me until there’s no more room for anything else, just sorrow. And then all at once she sweeps the tear from my cheek and flicks the pain away with the slight of her hand. Like a switch, the grief retreats, awakening the part of me I lost after Lindy’s accident, the part of me capable of feeling the most sincere and honest joy. But there’s also a hollow emptiness to it, as though something’s missing. I cradle my hands against my chest as though that pain was the only thing I had left to live for. A ball of tears forms in my throat.
“I promise not to hurt you,” Irkalla says, nev
er taking her eyes from mine.
A wide smile spreads across her face, exposing sharp teeth that would line up perfectly with the pattern on my neck. I focus on her, listen to her, and study her. The way her skin doesn’t seem to have a definite outline, as though I’m watching her through a camera with a shutter speed too slow to capture her image. Her hair cascades around her face and bounces gently as though gravity doesn’t apply to her the way it should. I watch the glint in her pale eyes go from the same greenness that covers her entirely, to a fiery green flame, burning so brightly it fills the space around me. I squint into it, not wanting to miss a thing.
Irkalla’s wings envelope me, holding the light inside the shelter for only us two. “Close your eyes,” her elfin voice jingles.
My hands tremble. I have the jarring realization that I still can’t sense Khayal, though one is slipping slender fingers over my shoulders and blowing sugar-spiced breath in my face. Yet it doesn’t startle me. It’s as though deep down I’ve always known. I knew there was more to this life than what meets the eye. I might not have known the shadows moving from the corner of my eye would turn into beautiful fairies and heal the wounded, but I knew I am meant for something more. Something else that other people aren’t. It all seems so clear now. This was always meant to happen. I am meant to be here right at this exact moment, doing this exact thing.
The hair on my arms stands on end, my breathing erratic and labored.
“Shhh, it’s alright my sweet, Keira. Hold still, this won’t take long.”
Irkalla’s arms tighten around me, her wings embracing my back in a cocoon. I squint against the flood of green light as her satiny lips press into my forehead, drawing my emotions to the surface, the thrill of it tingling crazily over my skin. It’s the most glorious sensation I’ve ever felt. A feeling stronger than love steals the breath from my chest. I want to weep, laugh and scream all at the same time and I never want it to end. And suddenly I understand who she is, what she does, and everything makes sense.
“Irkalla,” my voice rings out as I surrender to my guardian, my Ka, the keeper of my soul.
Irkalla eases her lips from my forehead, but the feeling still lingers with her breath on my face. “I am yours and you are mine, Keira. We are one.”
Every sensation in the world tumbles through my body all at once. I become aware of the most fundamental law of Khayalism: Irkalla will never leave me, not even if I asked her to. She’ll come whenever I call, heal me if ever I’m hurt. No matter what happens to me in the future, she will come when I need her.
And then, way too soon, it’s over as she peels her mesmerizing embrace away from me. My body feels numb and naked without her. With my eyes closed, desperately trying to savor the feeling, I frown, wishing for more but her wings recede and chilled fingers trace my hands, squeezing my fingers as she lets me go.
“Look at me, and see me, Keira,” she sings, lifting my chin with a tender finger.
Slowly, I lift my gaze, a swift gasp stealing my voice. Though the flame in her eyes still burns bright, Irkalla has changed from green to vivid ruby. What? What—happened to you? Why are you red?” I squeak at last, voice trembling.
“You’re excited,” she says, clasping my hands tightly. “Each Khayal wears the color of their handler’s emotions. It’s normal for our bond to feel like pleasure for you.”
Heat that matches the flames in her eyes burns my face. “Oh God,” I mumble, swallowing the humiliation.
And though I’m seeing it live, I can’t wrap my head around the exact moment transformation occurs as Irkalla’s color changes once more, this time to amber. I clasp a hand over my mouth, pointing to her chest. “Orange!” I pant.
A gentle giggle slips through her lips. “Don’t be embarrassed. It’s just as nice for me. Bonding with your Ka is nothing to be ashamed of. It is an intimate connection that you’ll never share with anyone else,” she says, trying unsuccessfully to reassure me.
“That’s for sure.” I hug my arms close to my chest. “So, you’re a living billboard of my emotions?”
Irkalla’s petal soft lips, curl up into a tender smile, her head tilts as she blinks back in agreement. At least that’s what I think is happening, only as I stare at her I get a weird static in my head, like trying to find a station on an old radio. Pieces of words, or maybe they’re pictures, begin to form. It’s like understanding what’s being said even though there are no words. And then in a flood of comprehension I hear it, I get it.
“What is a billboard?”
Jonathan said the Khayal had a different mind. I see what he meant now. I can read Irkalla’s thoughts. But it’s in a way of understanding what she’s saying through her feelings.
I scrunch my face, thinking really hard. “It’s a big board for advertising.”
But Irkalla just stares back. I see pictures of flowers and birds, trees and clouds, the only things that are missing are rainbows and ponies…oh, nope, there’s a rainbow.
“Never mind, I get it. You’re my very own, living, breathing mood ring.” I smile.
Massacre
Just as I begin to wrap my head around Irkalla’s telepathy something new begins. A funny soft tingle—not as strong as when my hand falls asleep, though still a pins-and-needles feeling—spreads from my fingertips, up my arms and neck, lifting the hair off my head as though I’ve touched a plasma ball.
A raw vibration pulsates through me: energy and strength like I’ve never known course through my veins. I feel like Wonder Woman, like I could leap down from this tree and maybe even fly.
“Wow!” I say out loud, but in my mind I think, “Is this you?”
Irkalla nods, still smiling.
“Oh, I could get used to this!” I say, clenching and unclenching a fist. I reach for a branch, ready to test my new strength, when gunfire splits through the stillness.
There is no time for games.
“Sorry, I have to go.”
The expression never changes on Irkalla’s face, she just smiles and—still thinking of roses and daffodils—as I swing a leg over the branch.
Just as I find a foothold ten more rounds sound directly below us and send me scrambling for my bow. Within seconds I have an arrow strung and ready before I can zero in on the shooter.
“Hide!” I shriek at Irkalla.
There’s a faint “pop” and she’s gone, an oily, green, swirling bubble hovers in her place. Her thoughts fade from my mind as I push a branch quietly aside, searching the ground below for the hunter. Black boots crunch through the bed of leaves. It’s possible that Irkalla even healed my hearing. It sounds like the walker is right next to me. Then I catch a second person on the other side of the trees. The two are heading right for each other. I recognize the second pair of hikers as being Jonathan’s shoes. I remember him standing on the boulder like a god, immortalized in a bath of sunlight…
Oh, my God! What just happened? My breathing labors in and out as I regain my focus watching the hunter approach. And Jonathan, unknowingly, walks straight toward him. My heart catches, skipping three beats, as the glint off a balding head moves into the clearing.
My blood slows to icy gel in my veins.
The chaos below me plays out in slow motion and seems no more real than a scene on a movie screen. Corduroy raises his hand and fires into the trees. Jonathan covers his head and ducks behind a tree. Three charred corpses litter the earthen floor. My eyes shoot to the surrounding trees. Hundreds of multicolored Khayal flutter in the branches. I can see them all, the colored ones that are bound to humans and the jet black ones that have no color at all because they have no soul to guard. It’s like a beautiful Christmas tree lit up and waiting for a celebration. But this is nothing to rejoice in.
Corduroy is on the hunt and he’s pretty good at feeling them. He knows he’s found a hive.
There’s a split second of stillness when I consider who I should save—the Khayal or Jonathan? Then the horror rages on as Cord’s Glock fires at the nearby maple
a second time. Most of the Khayal scatter into bubbles, but one orange and two black shrivel and die on a bed of needles twenty yards from the base of this tree.
No! Don’t hurt them—don’t hurt them. They’re good! I swing down the limbs without thinking.
“Stop!” I leap the last eight feet, landing steadily and raising my bow in one fluid motion. I aim it directly at my partner’s chest.
“Donavan, what the hell are you doing? And why are you here? Aren’t you supposed to be on some fancy assignment?” The over-muscled cue ball smiles at me, confused by my sudden appearance.
“Put your weapon down, Cord and return to base,” I plead, holding back angry tears as a battle wars inside me. Save the Khayal, save Jonathan and save Cord.
“Drop the bow, Lindy. Have you lost your mind?” A familiar voice orders from behind me.
I snap into agent Donavan mode and track Martin from the corner of my eye. Her crossbow is trained on my right ear, but I don’t lower my weapon just yet. “Why don’t you go home and play with your dolls, Martin?”
“You are so fired, you know that?” Martin hisses.
Wait. Martin doesn’t know? She still thinks I’m a hunter?
I glance at Cord, his dark brows knit together in confusion. He doesn’t know either? I’m stunned that he’s not privy to the fact that SEEK sent me to Ops to dispose of me, to let me die.
I whirl back to Martin as she begins to prowl, positioning herself for the kill.
“You think you’re so hot, stomping around here with your bad attitude and your untouchable record of kills. I’ve got news for you, Donavan! I’m Corduroy’s partner now, and it turns out your record isn’t that untouchable. I think you’re a fake and you’ve been stealing Cord’s kills all along.” Jealousy oozes from every feature on her delicate face.
I don’t care. I don’t want the record number of kills. It makes me feel sick all over again. The word “monster” echoes in my head.
“You are a good person,” Irkalla’s thoughts come at me from nowhere.
“Donavan, what are you doing? We’re friends,” Corduroy says slowly, laying his gun flat on his palm. “Back away, Martin. Don’t push her. She’s more dangerous than you think.”
Search (SEEK Book 1) Page 8
