Nessa had a point. Would she be able to cope living with him year after year if nothing changed? Maybe not. A day or a week possibly, but not years and years.
“So, what should I do if he decides not to get any help? Because that’s a possibility, isn’t it?”
“Mmm. That’s a hard one. But yes, I guess it’s possible. If that happened, you’d have to really think seriously about how much you want to be with him.”
Lizzy pulled herself up. “But we’re married, Ness. I’ve never considered not going back. But I almost feel like I’m blackmailing him, telling him he needs to get help before I will.”
“You really are doing it tough, aren’t you, you poor thing? There’ll be an answer, Liz, one way or the other. God won’t leave you high and dry. But if you did come back and he hadn’t got any help, you’d have to agree on very clear boundaries. You’ll have to do that anyway, even if he does get help, but it’ll be harder if he hasn’t. Anyway, you need to give him more time. And no, I don’t think it’s blackmail. It was a reasonable thing to do, given the circumstances.”
Lizzy sniffed and wiped her nose.
“Thanks Ness. You always seem to know what to say.”
Nessa gave a half-laugh. “I don’t know about that. I just wish I could do more.”
When Nessa ended the conversation, Lizzy hugged the receiver to her chest. It was her only form of contact with Daniel, as tenuous as it was, and she wanted to hold that thread as long as she could. Where was he? Not knowing was horrible. All she could do was pray that God would be with him, wherever he was, and that He would draw Daniel to Himself.
She looked up when Sal entered the room sometime later.
“Any news?”
Lizzy shook her head, and the tears she’d been holding back started to slide down her cheeks.
“Oh Liz.” Sal bent down, and wrapping her arms around Lizzy, comforted her until her tears stopped.
With Daniel so much on Lizzy’s mind, sleeping was always going to be a challenge, so she and Sal watched a James Bond movie on television to get her mind off him. The choice was limited, and although not great Bond fans, they agreed it was a better option than ‘The Way We Were’.
Curled up on the couch with Sal, munching on popcorn and sipping on hot chocolate, Lizzy tried to concentrate on what was happening. For a while she lost herself in the world of espionage, but every now and then an image or a thought would pop into her head and remind her that Daniel was missing. No, not really missing, just no one knew where he was. But God knows where he is. Oh God, please be with him. How was she ever going to sleep?
Once the movie was finished, it was way past bedtime, especially for Sal who had to get up and go to work the following morning. Lizzy climbed into bed and pulled out the Janette Oke novel Sal had given her to read. Maybe it wasn’t the best choice to be reading right now, but she was loving Marty’s journey, and the way God showed His love to her through all her trials and troubles.
She read into the small hours of the morning, devouring Marty’s story, clinging to the hope that if God had blessed Marty like He had, maybe He would also do the same for her. By the time she put the book down, her mind had settled, and she rested in the assurance that God wasn’t just watching over her, but over Daniel too.
“Liz… are you awake?”
Lizzy stirred and forced her eyes to open, shielding them from the sunlight pouring in through the flimsy lace curtains. Where had the night gone? She pulled herself up and focussed her attention on Sal. How did she always manage to look so fresh?
“I am now. What time is it?”
“Eight o’clock… I’ve got to go, Liz, or I’ll be late.” Sal walked over and gave Lizzy a big hug. “I’ll be praying for you, kiddo. Come back whenever you want. I’m always here for you, you know that, don’t you?”
Lizzy’s heart burst with love for her friend. How blessed she was to have Sal in her life.
“Yes, and thank you, Sal. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”
“Go on. Enough of that nonsense. Lock the door on your way out, will you?”
“Of course.”
Sal turned to leave.
“Sal…”
Sal stopped and turned around.
“Thank you. I mean it.”
Sal met Lizzy’s gaze, and an unspoken understanding passed between them. They would always be there for each other.
Chapter Fourteen
As the bus took Lizzy ever closer to her home and her father, she breathed in and tried to hold on to God’s strength. Mathew’s sermon remained fresh in her mind, as did her resolve to forgive her father. As hard as it was to say she forgave him, to live it out would be harder still. She’d never really considered what she’d forgiven him of. There were so many things. She’d been under his control most of her life, from being on display at riding shows, to him trying to marry her to Terrence. Becoming a teacher instead was her first time she’d stood her ground.
Lost in her thoughts, Lizzy almost missed her stop. Luckily for her, the bus driver stopped and called out, otherwise she would have ended up in town. She climbed down the steps and thanked the driver. Gwyneth was there waiting for her as promised, and got out of the car to greet her. Lizzy had told her not to bother, but Gwyneth had insisted, saying it was too far to walk in her condition.
“How was your weekend, dear?” Gwyneth asked after giving her a warm hug.
“It was good, thank you, Mother. I got a lot of things sorted.”
“Including Mathew?” Gwyneth raised her eyebrow and studied her daughter.
“Yes, including Mathew.” Lizzy smiled inwardly, glad that at last she was able to think of Mathew without an aching heart. She settled herself into the seat and looked ahead. “We spent several hours together on Saturday.” She turned her head to her mother and gulped. “I found out why he broke it off, and he also confirmed it was his mother in that photo.”
“That must have been a difficult few hours?”
“Yes, it was. It was upsetting, to be honest, but I’m glad I know.” Lizzy paused, tilting her head and taking a deep breath. “It was because of his mother. She took a dislike to me from the moment we met, but I had no idea, she hid it that well. It must have had something to do with her relationship with Father. Mathew didn’t know about that either. She just kept telling him I wasn’t the one for him, and put so much pressure on him that in the end he had to choose between her and me.” Lizzy lowered her head and played with her wedding ring. “He chose her.”
“Oh my poor darling. That’s so sad,” Gwyneth said as she stopped the car just outside the entrance gates. One of the gates had become unhinged and was blocking the driveway. Gwyneth climbed out and moved the gate back.
Lizzy spent the few moments alone to reign in her emotions. No room for self pity or regret any longer.
“Sorry sweetie, I didn’t mean to interrupt you,” Gwyneth said when she re-entered the car.
“Not a problem, Mother.”
Lizzy took a deep breath and fixed her gaze on the rose garden as the car crunched its way up the gravel driveway.
“I was angry with Mathew for not standing up to her, but it’s too late for anything to change now, so we just have to get on with our lives.” She turned to look at her mother. “Sal told me he’s started going out with a girl from college. I’m pleased for him. He seemed so lonely.”
Gwyneth smiled at her warmly. “And you’ve finally let go of him?”
“Yes, I believe I have, at last. Now I just want to get home to Daniel.”
“Have you had any news?”
“I called Nessa last night, but no one’s seen him for several days. She said Riley would go looking tonight. I’m concerned about him, Mother. I almost wish I hadn’t left.”
“It must be hard for you dear, but stay strong. I’m sure it will all work out in the end.”
“I hope so, Mother. I really do.”
Gwyneth parked the car in the garage and they both climbed out.
“Come on, let’s go inside. I’ve got lunch ready.”
The phone rang while Lizzy and her mother were seated at the table having lunch. Gwyneth put her sandwich down and walked to the counter to answer it. Gwyneth’s face paled and she gripped the counter tightly.
“Yes, she’s here. I’ll just put you on.”
Lizzy looked at her mother quizzically and mouthed, “Who is it?” Her heart beat rapidly. Something had happened to Daniel. She just knew it.
Gwyneth covered the mouthpiece. “It’s the hospital.”
Her eyes held deep concern as she passed the receiver to Lizzy.
Lizzy took a deep breath to calm herself before answering. “Hello, Elizabeth O’Connor here.”
“Mrs O’Connor,” a woman with a clear business like voice responded. “Dr Henderson here, from Hull General Hospital. I’m glad we were able to locate you. Your husband had an accident last night, and he’s in Intensive Care. He’s in a coma, and has multiple injuries. I don’t want to alarm you, but we think you should come as quickly as possible.”
Lizzy slumped and her hand flew to her chest. Her heart raced. This couldn’t be happening.
"Will he … will he be alright?"
"We honestly don't know, Mrs O'Connor. He's not in good way. We won't really know until he comes out of the coma. If he comes out at all."
What did she mean? 'If he comes out of it at all…' It couldn’t be….. Lizzy fought to gain control of her emotions. It would achieve nothing to break down on the phone to a doctor she didn't know. She took a deep breath and gulped, clinging onto the receiver with both hands.
“I’ll come right away, but I may not get there until tonight.” Lizzy straightened herself and held out her hand to her mother.
Gwyneth wrapped her arms around Lizzy, and supported her physically.
“Can you tell me what happened, Dr Henderson?”
“He had a car accident. Ran into a pole from what I hear.”
“No one else was hurt?”
“Not that I know of.”
Lizzy let out a sigh of relief. She’d had visions of a multi car pile up with bodies strewn everywhere. At least he hadn’t hurt anybody else.
“Thank you for telling me, Doctor. I’ll organise myself and get there as soon as I can.”
Lizzy hung up the phone and collapsed into her mother’s arms.
“I’ll drive you, Elizabeth. I can’t let you go on your own. He’s not in a good way?”
Lizzy shook her head and sobbed uncontrollably. She clutched her chest and felt for her cross. Oh God, I can’t lose him now.
Gwyneth pulled her tighter and stroked her hair.
Lizzy packed in a daze, and before she knew it, she and Gwyneth were on the M5 heading north.
An empty feeling sat in the pit of her stomach the whole way. What if he dies? It didn’t bear thinking about. She pleaded for God to keep him alive. Had she caused this? Maybe not directly, but indirectly? How could she live with the guilt if he died? Oh God, you’ve got to let him be okay. Please.
The cold darkness that settled over Hull as they entered the outskirts of the city reflected Lizzy’s mood. Heavy mist rolled in from the mountains, enshrouding the city in a cold damp blanket. Lizzy shivered as she climbed out of the car in the hospital car park.
She and Gwyneth walked to the main entrance and stopped in front of the directory board. The Intensive Care Unit was on the third floor, and as reception was closed, they took the lift directly there.
Lizzy held onto Gwyneth’s arm for support. Not knowing what to expect was the hardest thing. She should have asked the doctor for more details. Standing in front of the Nurse’s station, Lizzy clung to Gwyneth and waited until one of the nurses stopped what she was doing and peered over her glasses at them. Her friendly eyes and demeanour provided Lizzy with some encouragement.
“Yes, can I help you?”
“I’m Elizabeth O’Connor. My husband Daniel is here…” Lizzy’s voice wobbled and caught in her throat.
“Oh, Mrs O’Connor. We’ve been expecting you. Take a seat and I’ll call a doctor.”
Lizzy and Gwyneth took a seat, but all Lizzy wanted to do was to see Daniel.
Lizzy spent an eternity waiting for the doctor. Fear immobilized her, while the tortuously hard seat meant she couldn’t sit still. Waiting would kill her. How bad was he? Maybe he hadn’t made it. Her heart beat faster and her pulse raced. No God, please let him be okay.
Finally a young male doctor appeared, dressed in a white coat and looking like he should still be in school. Lizzy had hoped Doctor Henderson would’ve been there.
“Mrs O’Connor?”
Lizzy nodded and gulped. The moment of truth had arrived.
“Come this way, please.” He led them into a small clinical room with a round table and four plastic chairs. They took a seat and waited for the young doctor, who had introduced himself as Dr Miller, to speak. Lizzy grabbed Gwyneth’s hand.
“Your husband has been seriously injured, Mrs O’Connor.” Lizzy let out a slow breath. At least he’s alive. Thank you God.
“He’s still in a coma, and he has swelling on his brain. We’re hopeful he won’t have any significant brain damage, but we’ll have a better idea when the swelling goes down. He also has severe bruising on his chest and abdomen, and has several broken ribs. He’s lucky to be alive, Mrs O’Connor.” Dr Miller looked Lizzy in the eye.
Lizzy grimaced. Poor Daniel.
Gwyneth squeezed Lizzy’s hand.
“How long will he be in a coma?”
“Impossible to say. It could just be a matter of days, but it could stretch out for weeks, even months.”
“Can we see him?” Lizzy leaned on her mother for support.
“You can, but he’s not a pretty sight. Just a warning.”
“It’s okay. I just want to see him.” Lizzy looked at Gwyneth. How would she have survived without her mother’s strength and support?
She followed Dr Miller along the corridor until they reached the room where Daniel lay. The doctor opened the door and ushered them in. Lizzy gasped at Daniel lying in the bed with tubes of all sorts attached to his body. He didn’t look like Daniel at all. His face was bruised and swollen, and a deep gash low on his forehead had been stitched. His right eye was black and his head wrapped in bandages.
Lizzy’s heart melted at him lying there, so broken and damaged, and she raced forward and sat beside him, taking his hand gently. As she peered into his face for some sign of life, tears rolled down her cheeks.
“Daniel, I’m so sorry. Please come back to me,” she whispered to him as she squeezed his hand, but his lack of response only made her tears fall harder. She took the tissue her mother held out and wiped her eyes. Her mother’s hand on her shoulder was comforting, but didn’t alleviate her pain.
“Can he hear me, doctor?” Lizzy finally asked when she was able.
The doctor was checking the monitor, and stopped to answer. “Probably not, but best to assume he can. Just speak to him normally. It often helps when comatose patients start to come out of their coma to have someone they know there for them.”
“Thank you.” Lizzy turned back to Daniel. She’d stay here with him until he woke up. She couldn’t live if he didn’t. So lost in her grief for Daniel, she’d forgotten her mother was standing behind her until Gwyneth squeezed her shoulder and suggested they get something to eat.
“You need to look after yourself, Elizabeth, for the baby’s sake. Come on, let’s get some dinner, and then we can come back for a while.”
Lizzy almost had to be dragged away, and only agreed to leave when Dr Miller promised to let them know if there was any change.
Gwyneth guided Lizzy out of the room and down to a large cafeteria where she bought sandwiches and cups of tea. Being quite late, there was little choice, but in reality, Lizzy wasn’t hungry. Worry over Daniel sat heavy in her stomach, leaving no room for food.
“He’s in good hands, dear,” Gw
yneth said as she unwrapped her egg and lettuce sandwich a few minutes later.
“But he’s such a mess. I don’t know what I’ll do if he doesn’t survive.”
“I’m sure he’ll pull through, dear. They’ll do everything they can for him.”
“I need to stay with him, Mother.” Lizzy leaned back in her seat and looked at Gwyneth.
“I understand, sweetie, but you should sleep tonight, and then come back first thing in the morning. They’ll let us know if there’s any change.”
“I guess you’re right, but I feel so bad.” Lizzy gulped and wiped her eyes with the back of her hand. “He wouldn’t be here if I hadn’t left him.”
“Oh Elizabeth, don’t say things like that. You did what you thought was best at the time, and Daniel made his own choices. You’re not responsible for that. You didn’t put him in that bed. He did it himself. You have to accept that, because it’s the truth.”
Lizzy sighed as a wave of guilt washed through her body. She wrapped her hands around her cup of tea. “But I know I didn’t help. Maybe if I’d been a better wife we could have worked things out and this wouldn’t have happened.” She sniffed and glanced at the nurses who had just entered. “I just want the opportunity to make our marriage work, Mother. He needs to pull through. He really does.”
Gwyneth reached out and took Lizzy’s hand. “I’ll pray that he will, dear, and trust that God will work it out for good.”
Lizzy nodded and gave her mother a half-smile. How full of surprises she was. Fancy her being so spiritual and encouraging.
Returning to Daniel’s room, Lizzy hoped for some improvement. Just something little. Anything would do. But nothing had changed. Nothing at all. Daniel lay there, hooked up to those hideous machines, still and lifeless. How could she leave him alone in this cold, clinical room?
“But Elizabeth, you need to get some sleep. We’ll come back first thing in the morning.”
Gwyneth was insistent. Lizzy finally gave in, but before she left, she squeezed Daniel’s hand and gently kissed his cheek.
The Shadows Trilogy Box Set: A Christian Romance Page 20
