“They also rescued me when they didn’t have to. I trust them. I’m safe.”
His lips flattened into a thin grim line. It’d been awhile since I’d seen that expression. I was almost happy to see it.
“Very well. Can we send someone for you?”
“No. I have to do something first. Then I’ll be home. Are there any issues I need to know about?”
Vika cleared her throat. “Not anything major.”
That made me happy. Valinor was safe. “You know what Caspar wanted?” I asked.
“Yes.”
“Are we in possession of it?”
“No. It was all destroyed,” Galton replied.
I wondered if he was telling the truth, but I had no reason not to trust him. “Watch out for anything odd.”
“Meaning?”
“I’m afraid Caspar will retaliate.”
Vika looked at the monitors and said, “We’ll double security. Keep our eyes on the sky.”
Once the call ended, I turned to the crew of the Nirvana. “Let’s go get the son of a bitch.”
They all laughed. “We need a plan first, Empress,” Zabe said, leading us to the table we had played cards on that day that seemed like forever ago. Nero was sitting on the table playing with dice from a game.
“You guys are serious?” Huxley’s green eyes searched ours.
Ever and I nodded. I took a deep breath and traced the tattoo on my arm. I didn’t look up as I spoke. I couldn’t. I was ashamed. “His men attacked me, starved me, and beat me with a chain. Just because I can heal doesn’t mean it didn’t hurt. Then I was starved and my head held under water until I almost passed out. He needs to die. We’ll never be safe. Never…” my voice cracked.
Finally glancing up, I noticed they all had tears in their eyes. Ever’s were dripping off of her chin. I grabbed her hand.
“Akacia, we’re sorry—”
I wasn’t sure I could handle a bunch of apologies, so I held up my free hand. “I know. I understand why. It took some time to get to this point. I don’t want to think about what I went through anymore. I want to make the plan to kill him.”
“Okay then. Let’s talk plans.”
“Is his ship his base of operations?” I asked.
“Yes. He doesn’t have a planet of his own,” Ever answered.
“So we attack his ship. Kill him and destroy all the information and research he has on Splicers and nanites. We can’t risk anyone else getting it. We can’t let him do to others what he’s done to us,” Ever said.
“What’s the best course of action?”
“We could launch a missile at the ship,” Zabe said.
Ever shook her head. “We can’t guarantee that everything would be destroyed.”
“We could go in ourselves and take him out,” Huxley suggested.
“Again that doesn’t guarantee that we destroy everything.”
“What about a bomb, planted at the core of the ship?” Briar suggested. “The probability that the whole ship explodes is higher using the bomb. To anyone investigating, it’ll look like something went wrong with the ship’s core. An accident.”
Zabe tapped the table. “I agree.”
“Zabe, can you make the bomb?” Huxley asked him.
Meeting his eyes, he gave a firm nod. “Absolutely.”
They all looked at Ever. “Do it,” she said. “How long will it take you to make it?”
“Few days. I need to see if we have everything. Might need to stop by the space station.”
“So, who is going to plant it?” Briar asked.
“Me,” I said the same time as Ever.
She huffed and rolled her eyes. “Have you ever done something like this before?”
Shaking my head, my eyes drifted to the floor. “But I want him dead. Maybe if I know he’s really gone, the nightmares will go away.”
The silence was deep. Everybody thought about what it would mean if Caspar were dead.
Zabe spoke first, “I know how you feel, Akacia. Caspar killed my brother in front of me.”
My eyes flicked up to his wet brown ones. “I didn’t know.”
“Of course, you didn’t. We all want him dead. Your…experience…has been the most recent. It’s fresh. I understand that. Ever is really good at getting in and out of places undetected. It should be her.”
Huxley ran his finger over the table. “I don’t want her going either. My first instinct is to go to protect her, but I know she is the best person for this job. If it has any chance of working, she has to be the one.”
It was late. We had been up talking about the plan until exhaustion finally hit everyone. Ever walked me back to my room.
“I’ll…uh…see you in the morning,” she stammered then walked away.
I nodded and went in the room. Why didn’t I invite her in or giving her a goodnight kiss?. My heart ached to be with her. I missed her when she wasn’t close to me. I missed how the air felt when she was around. I missed how my heart sped up when she looked at me. I missed feeling warm and safe. I wanted to talk to her about what we wanted, but every time I thought about it, I wondered if we defined what we were it would put an end to us.
Someone had left me a T-shirt and shorts to sleep in. After putting them on, I slipped into bed. My body relaxed against the soft mattress, fluffy pillow, and warm blanket. I lay there for a long time staring at the ceiling. This would be the first night Ever and I have been apart since she rescued me. It felt wrong.
Sighing, I turned on my side and closed my eyes.
Later that night, I woke up in a deep sweat and gasping for air. My body trembled even under the blanket. I jammed my eyes closed and fought against the panic. I tried to remember what Ever had taught me, but my brain wouldn’t cooperate.
My chest tightened and my throat burned. I pulled at the collar of my shirt. I couldn’t do this. Tears streaked down my face. Ever. I flew from my room and down the corridor only stopping when I was in front of her door. I pounded on it, hoping she was in there.
The door opened and there Ever stood with a look of concern on her face. “Kaci?” She took a step toward me and pulled me into her arms. “You’re safe.”
I shook my head, the tears building up so much I couldn’t see.
Her arms were around me, holding me close, keeping me safe. “I’ve got you.” She led me inside and to her bed almost tripping over Nero as he rushed in.
Chapter Eighteen
Everleigh
KACI’S ENTIRE BODY SHOOK VIOLENTLY. I took her hand and put it on my chest and I put mine on hers. “Breathe. Slow, deep breaths.”
When that didn’t work, I remembered what I had read on the computer earlier when I had researched panic attacks. “Focus on what you can see, taste, feel.” Her eyes searched the room. “Right here, Kaci. What do you see?”
“You.” Her voice was that of a whisper.
“What do you smell?”
“Sweet.”
“What do you feel?”
“Your heartbeat.”
Finally, her breathing evened out and the panic disappeared from her eyes.
I hated that I could only comfort her. That I couldn’t protect her from what was going on in her mind. I loathed that it was because of me she had these attacks.
“Do you want to stay?” I asked.
She nodded.
As much as I wanted to kiss her, I didn’t. That wasn’t what she needed right now. She needed to be held, to feel safe, loved.
I had wanted to stay with her or invite her to my room when we said goodnight, but I wasn’t sure she would want to. I wasn’t sure if her feelings would be the same now that we were off the planet.
We scooted up to the head of the bed and I lay down pulling her to me. She rested her head on my chest.
“Plus, your ceiling is much prettier than mine. It means so much more now that I know you’re a Splicer.”
I laughed and ran my fingers up and down her back tracing her moon tattoos. Now t
hat we were settled, Nero jumped up on the end of the bed, turned in a circle a few times then made himself cozy.
“Does it have to be you?” she whispered.
“Yes.” It was a simple an answer. “I am the best one for the job. I have been sneaking in and out of places for a long time. Longer than anyone else on the ship.”
“You’ll have a bomb in your hand.”
“Briar won’t turn it on until I’m off the ship. I’ll be safe.”
“And what if you’re not?”
“I will, Kace. I’ll come back. Part jaguar, remember?”
“Always land on your feet?” she tried to joke.
“Something like that.”
She wiped tears off her cheek. Silence fell around us and we just lay there. Together. Holding on. I could tell the second she fell asleep because her breathing changed. Only then did I close my eyes and let sleep come for me, too.
The aroma of eggs wafted down the corridor and my mouth watered. In the kitchen, I smiled at Huxley. “Smells like heaven!”
“I figured you two would enjoy a good hot breakfast.” He grinned and dished out healthy servings of his eggs on waiting plates.
Kaci jumped in a seat and practically inhaled hers. I took my time savoring each bite. Huxley dumped more on her plate. “This is so good. Thank you.”
She caught sight of the wolf tattoo on his shoulder. Huxley noticed, too. “I’m spliced with gray wolf DNA, hence the hair,” he told her. “I have excellent night vision, run fast, and am loyal.”
“And you’re a great chef.”
He laughed. “Yeah.” He looked back at me while she was eating and smiled. I knew what he was thinking. He was impressed this didn’t bother her in the least.
Nero jumped up on the table and Huxley placed a piece of egg in front of him. Nero sniffed it, then picked it up with his hands, and stuck it in his mouth. His face scrunched up like he didn’t like it, but then he smiled and ran back and forth until Huxley gave him more.
The rest of the crew showed up. “What ever happened to the investigation into Caipra?” I asked.
“The Authority never found the second Wapi spacecraft. The leaders that were killed have been replaced, but some of those replacements have chosen to leave the Alliance.”
“A coup?” Kaci asked.
“A failed one. Too many of the new leaders stayed with the Alliance. I’m sure they’ll try again,” Briar explained. “Tell us what happened on Terronda? What was it like?”
“Horrible,” I answered at the same time Kaci said, “Wonderful.”
Laughing, she questioned, “Which was it?”
Our eyes locked and I answered, “Both.”
We told them about our time on Terronda. I loved watching Kaci tell the stories. She was so animated. I fell a little more in love with her. Soon, I was wrapped up in listening to one of them.
I began to dream a little, thinking of how we could take care of Caspar and find my people. We could cruise around the universe together and have those adventures she always wanted to go on. We would learn everything there was to know about one another. Maybe there could be a happy ending.
Then I thought about the Authority. Even if Caspar was out of the way, we were still fugitives. I couldn’t bring Kaci into a life of living on the run. I wouldn’t. She deserved normal. She deserved happiness. I couldn’t give that to her. I wiped away a tear before anyone had a chance to see it.
“I see the way you two look at each other,” Briar confronted me when I walked onto the bridge.
We were alone, but I still looked around the room to make sure. I was sure she could see the blood rush to my face. “She’s pretty.”
“She’s beautiful. So are you. But it’s more than that.”
“I’m attracted to her. That’s all.”
She huffed and rolled her eyes. “It’s so much more than that, Ever. You need to tell her how you feel.”
“I can’t. She deserves more than a life on the run from Caspar and the Authority.”
“You could have other options. You won’t know unless you talk to her.”
Crossing the room, I went to my control pad. I tapped it a few times and my profile popped up on the screen. It had a picture of me and then a list of things I was wanted for by the Authority. “Theft, destruction of property, assault, murder. This is who I am. Who we all are.”
“Not because we want to be.”
“Do you think that matters to the Authority? Will they wipe away the charges because we didn’t want to be like this?”
“Of course not, but we’re not cold-blooded killers. That means something to her. She understands.”
“Maybe, but the Authority will always be after us and I can’t drag her into a life like that. I have to bring her home and forget about her.”
“Just like that? No matter how either of you feels?”
“It’s what she deserves.”
“I know you think that, but do something for me. Talk to her. Tell her how you feel. See where she stands with all this.”
“Fine,” I agreed, more to get her to shut up than anything. A small part of me hoped that maybe there was a way and maybe by talking to her we could figure it out.
Chapter Nineteen
Akacia
BRIAR SPREAD OUT THE MAPS in front of us. “Obviously I can’t map out the whole universe. The most I can tell from the pictures I’ve seen are that the planet can sustain life, but not well. The land looks barren most of the time. I’ve never seen any indications of water on the planet, but I’ve only seen so many pictures.”
I studied the maps. There were a lot of red Xs on planets. “You’ve ruled these out?”
“Yes. Ones that are gas planets, unlivable, or we can verify don’t look like the pictures.”
There were still so many planets without an X. How would they find their people?
“You like Ever,” she said.
Startled, I looked up. “I do.”
“Have you forgiven her?”
I looked out the window and chewed on my lower lip. “Yes. I understand why she did it, but it doesn’t make it hurt any less. I still have nightmares. So, yes, I forgive her, but I still have a lot to work through.”
“She’s been through a lot with Caspar. He didn’t torture her the same way he did you. She feels responsible for all of us and all the people we left behind. After she turned you over to Caspar, she spent days held up in her room crying and having her own nightmares. She doesn’t think we know. She never faltered when we found a way to get to you. I’ve never known her to have feelings for anyone. Not the kind she has for you.”
I wanted to say that I had the same crazy feelings. That I had fallen for Ever the moment I laid eyes on her for the first time back on Valinor. That even though she turned me over, I couldn’t hate her, not really. I tried, but deep down…I couldn’t. I stayed quiet, unsure if I could trust Briar with my feelings yet. I didn’t really trust myself.
“I’d love to see Ever happy. She deserves it.”
Looking back down at the maps, I asked, “How many of your people does Caspar have?”
“Originally about a hundred. Not sure how many are left,” she answered. “My DNA was spliced with a white tiger.”
I looked at her.
“My hair is normally white. I dye it different colors. White is so colorless, ya know?” The corners of her mouth turned up and her blue eyes sparkled.
“I like the pink.”
“Thanks.”
“Were you all born on a planet?”
“I believe so.”
“So suffice to say your families could be on the planet you were born on?”
“It’s entirely possible.”
“Do you remember anything about living there?”
“No.”
“So quick to answer,” I said.
“I was young.”
“Have you tried hypnosis?”
“No. You think something like that would work if we were so yo
ung?”
“I think it’s worth trying. One of the space stations might have a hypnotist,” I suggested.
“I’ll look into it. So it doesn’t freak you out that we’re part animal?”
“Does it bother you that I’m part robot?”
Briar laughed out loud. “You’re not part robot. You just have nanites. Not nearly the same thing.”
“And you just have a little animal DNA in you. No biggie.”
The rest of the crew came into the room. “So, Zabe says he has almost everything ready,” Ever informed us.
Zabe confirmed with a slight nod. “I only need one thing.”
“Where do we get it?” Huxley asked.
“The Ignix Station. There’s a guy there. I can make a trade.”
Concern passed over Ever’s face, but she didn’t say anything. She just nodded.
Briar’s fingers were gliding over the control pad. “We can be there tomorrow.” Meeting my eyes, she said, “There’s a hypnotist there.” Briar filled them in on the rest of my idea and they seemed interested.
“Which one of us will go under hypnosis?” Huxley asked.
“I will,” Briar said. “Ever, there’s something I want to buy.”
Ever’s eyebrows arched. “Must be big for you to be asking beforehand.”
“I want to buy an AI.” Briar bit on her lower lip waiting for Ever’s answer.
“You mean a robot?” I asked.
“Essentially, yes. As you know, our computer is very personable. I’d like to download her into a body. She’d be able to assist us better.”
“Very well. If you think you can do that, I’m okay with it.”
“Really?” Briar’s eyes sparkled.
“Sure,” Ever said with a shrug.
Briar threw her arms around Ever and squeezed. “Thank you!”
She sprinted over to the computer and her fingers started flying. Something dinged and she stopped and looked at a different screen. “The results are back on the nanites.”
This got everybody’s attention.
“Akacia’s nanites are specifically healing ones. They are fascinating things. Programmed only to do that one thing.”
“Can they heal anything?” Ever asked.
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