Beaumont makes his way toward us, his lips twitching into a small smile, but his eyes aren’t smiling at all, in fact they look sad. I’m sure that mine mirror them as well. Without speaking, he cups my cheek and my breath hitches when his lips touch mine.
“Two weeks isn’t so long.” He grins against my mouth.
Smiling, I shake my head. “It’s not.”
“I’ll call you, often,” he promises.
Lifting my hand, I wrap my fingers around his wrist and hold on tightly.
“I know you will,” I breathe. I don’t know.
What I do know is that he gets lost in his music, in traveling, and in his shows. That’s what has me the most worried, him losing himself. I don’t want him to spiral again.
Granted, I don’t know the man that he was while he was drinking, but he wants this change so badly, and I want him to have it, to be happy and at peace.
The four of us load up in the SUV, the girls in the back and the guys in the front, again. The ride to the airport is quiet and I can’t help but feel a cloud of gloom and doom hovering over us.
Once we’re at the airport and checked in, I turn to him, knowing that I’m going to have to walk away and hating it.
Beaumont is wearing his aviator glasses and a ball cap pulled down as far as it can be against his forehead. The only part of his face that I can see is his lips. His beard covers what his glasses don’t. Smiling, I lift my hand and run my fingers through the hair of his beard.
“Wish you didn’t have to go,” he rasps.
“Everything will be fine. Austin will be okay. Daniel will be okay. The tour will go wonderfully and I’ll see you in two weeks in Washington.” I grin.
He shakes his head, he turns and touches his lips to my palm. “It will be. But I’m still going to miss you lying next to me.”
“When you don’t sleep?” I ask.
He grins against my hand. His tongue sneaking out to taste me before he shifts and lowers his face closer to mine. His lips touch mine and my eyes automatically close, preparing to become weak-kneed by one of his delicious kisses.
“You’re mine, Hutton. Don’t forget. Don’t talk yourself out of it. We are for one another, meant to be together. It just took me a little time to get my shit together, but I’m solid, darlin’.”
Inhaling through my nose, I can feel my nostrils flare as I try to fight back the emotion that fills me from his words. His lips touch mine, his tongue sliding inside of my mouth and I moan as he strokes me. As he stokes the fires inside of me with just the simple touch of his tongue against my own.
When we’re both breathless, he pulls me against his chest and I feel his chin rest on the top of my head. “This shouldn’t feel this fucking bad,” he murmurs.
I nod once, agreeing with his words. It shouldn’t be this hard, I shouldn’t feel this sad, this dark. It’s only two weeks. Sometimes couples are separated for months at a time, years even. This is only two weeks, only one weekend really.
We can do this.
I refuse to be a girl who can’t be apart from her boyfriend. I have put myself through school. I own my own business with zero help from anyone. I’m independent and I won’t be this sad meek thing just because I miss my man.
Clearing my throat, I take a step back and tilt my head so that I can see into his aviators. Thankfully, he tugs his glasses off and I’m treated to the sight of his warm dark eyes. His lips twitch and he shakes his head.
“Talk to you soon, darlin’. Be good,” he murmurs.
Rising to my toes, I touch my lips to his. “You too, Beaumont,” I breathe.
Taking another step back, I turn from him and walk toward the TSA line. Looking back over my shoulder, I give him a smile. His eyes shift from my ass to my face and his lips turn up into their own grin.
“You know, you two are sickening,” Laurie announces once we’re in line.
“Are you going to tell me about Jesse?” I ask. “Or maybe you’d like to tell me about the person you keep texting on your phone.”
She grunts but doesn’t speak right away. I allow her, her silence for a moment, but I will find out. It’s been long enough, and it’s time she tells me.
“I almost broke up with him yesterday. I tried to actually. I told him about Chelle, but we never did talk about it. I said it in the middle of a fight and then we kind of got distracted later and we never really discussed it,” I admit, deciding if I expect transparency with her, then I better give it as well.
Neither of us says anything as we make our way through the TSA checks and then grab a coffee on the way to the terminal. Once we’re settled in our seats and waiting for the plane to arrive, Laurie clears her throat.
“I slept with Ford Matthews a couple of weeks ago,” she blurts out.
My head turns to face her so fast that it hurts my neck. Lifting my hand, I wrap my fingers around the back of my neck and stare at her wide-eyed. Shocked. I’m completely shocked.
“Are you guys… together?” I ask, thinking about all of the time she just spent with Jesse.
She snorts. “Not at all. We’ve texted a few times. I don’t know if he wants more, seems like he might, but I don’t.”
“What was wrong with him?” I breathe, desperate to know what could possibly be wrong with Ford. He’s so handsome, established, and seems like such a nice guy.
She shakes her head. “Aside from the fact that he’s clearly still hung up on some girl from his past? Nothing. He was fine in bed and all, but he was a little too controlling,” she says, wrinkling her nose.
“You don’t like that, I take it?” I ask.
She laughs. “Apparently you do?”
I shrug. “I’m not answering that. So, what are you going to do and what’s up with Jesse?”
Laurie lifts her coffee to her lips and takes a long sip. “Nothing. I’m not doing anything. Jesse was a good time and we have plans to have repeat performances in two weeks, but it’s nothing serious. I don’t want anything serious. I’m not like you, Hutton.”
“Not like me?”
She nods. “You are a relationship girl. You’re never going to be promiscuous and that’s okay because that’s not who you are. The man that you fall in love with, you’ll marry. Me? I’ll probably never fall in love because I won’t allow myself to.”
“Don’t say that, you never know.”
“See? You’re so sweet, which is why I love you, but I’m not sweet.”
We don’t say anything else.
I’m not sure what else to say.
I hate that Laurie doesn’t see herself the way that I see her.
She may not be sugary sweet, but she does sweet things. She loves hard, she’s always loved me hard. She would make a wonderful partner because she would always be loyal, stable, and defend her lover with all of her heart and soul.
BEAUMONT
Daniel and Austin are on my fucking shit list. Jesse heads back to the bus but thankfully doesn’t speak. I don’t know if that’s because he doesn’t want to talk, or maybe because he’s too busy thinking about Laurie.
I should probably warn him off of her, but Laurie is a big girl, and she’s no shy virgin, she came here bound and determined to party like a rock star and I have no doubt that Jesse showed her a good time.
Jesse pulls up to the bus and I quickly exit the SUV, jogging toward the door. It’s still early, so hopefully everyone is still inside and passed out. We’re getting this done and over with right fucking now.
Wrenching the door open, I climb inside with one step up and place my hands on my hips as I look around. There is a naked woman face down on the couch, her body draped over Austin’s equally naked one. Daniel is passed out in the middle of the floor, two women curled against one another lying right next to him.
Brian groans from his place in his bunk and I watch as he throws his legs over the side. He jumps down wearing nothing but his boxers. When he sees us, he pauses, his eyes roaming over the scene in front of him before they shi
ft back to me. He looks completely hungover, and it surprises me, because he usually doesn’t get trashed.
“It was a bit crazy last night,” he admits.
“I see that,” I mutter.
Honestly, I wasn’t here so I don’t care that women were brought back here and they partied. It really doesn’t make a difference to me if I’m not here, it’s when I’m here and trying to work, trying to keep from drinking, from falling down a deep fucking hole of regret that I mind.
“Wake the fuck up,” I shout.
All five sleeping people moan. The women roll around and I gather their clothes, throwing them at their bodies.
“You have ten seconds to get the fuck off the bus, ladies,” I say.
“Such a goddamn southern gentleman,” Austin huffs, his eyes still closed.
I smirk. “You know me better than that.”
He sits up, his cock on display, not giving a fuck about it either. “I thought that I did. Then you get sober and get yourself hitched to some little hometown thing. While I’ll admit she’s hot, I can’t see you settling down, Beaumont.”
“Then you don’t know me as well as you thought,” I snap.
He chuckles, leaning back against the couch cushion as the women hurriedly tug on their clothes and one by one run out of the bus.
“Why do you want to settle down so badly? Is it for you or because you think it’s time? Do you love her?”
He fires off his questions as if he thinks that I have to justify shit to him. I don’t. Shaking my head, I lift my hand and run my fingers through my hair.
“You don’t fucking get it, Austin, and you probably never will. My life here, this is all an act. The real me is the man from Gallup, Texas. The best friend, the brother, the man who wants a family. I’m this man too, but this drugs, sex, rock-and-roll version of me, it’s not who I am at the core, just like it’s not who you are, either. It’s who I’ve become, it’s not me and I don’t fucking like it.”
“Why are you here then?”
I shrug. “Beats the fucking hell out of me. I’d rather be in Gallup on my ranch writing songs.” My gaze drifts to Daniel and I watch him flinch at my words and my glare. “You can either grow with me or go elsewhere. That goes for you too, Daniel. I’m fucking done with this shit. This isn’t just my career, this is my life and I’m making some healthy changes, with or without y’all.”
“She’s got your balls in a vise,” Daniel snorts.
My nostrils flare, anger fills me and he holds up his hands with a laugh, obviously realizing he’s gone too far.
“Leave it alone. She ain’t a bad girl,” Austin mutters as he grabs his boxers from the floor. “Love you, Beau, love being in a band with you, but I ain’t ready to settle down quite yet. I’m going to dip after this tour is done. Made my decision last night.”
I nod once, suddenly feeling sad. Everything must change, I understand that, I just wish that it didn’t have to change this group. We play well together, we’ve risen from the bottom together. I know that we’ll keep rising too, just wish we didn’t have to go our separate ways.
“You ever want back, just ask,” I offer.
He lifts his chin, knowing my offer is shit. In a couple of years, he’ll be off doing something else, in a different band and rocking out the way he wants to. I won’t be anything other than that guy he used to be friends with, that dude he used to play and party with. And in all honesty, that is who he’ll be to me as well.
“Are you done being pussies?” Daniel asks as he stands to his feet. “Let’s get some breakfast before the bus takes off. I’m hungover as fuck.”
Just like that, the drama is over. I’m still pissed at Daniel, still angry that he was such a fucking dick to Hutton. Although he isn’t acting like he has anything up his sleeve with Andi, I have a feeling that he does. He wouldn’t be so adamant if he didn’t.
He’s going to be fucking disappointed when he realizes that even without Hutton, I don’t want Andi. She has her own set of issues to deal with, ones that she avoids at all costs. That’s not the woman that I want to share my life with, the woman that I want to have children with. She’s also not the woman that I love, as long as I’ve known her, I’ve only ever felt lust for her—nothing else.
Hutton is the woman for me. She’s mine and she is the only person that I can see sharing my life with.
Chapter Thirty-One
HUTTON
Laurie drops me off at my house with a smile and a wave. We’re both exhausted and jetlagged. I wave to her as she pulls away from my driveway before I bend down and tug my handle up on my luggage. I drag my bag behind me as I make my way toward my front steps.
I don’t see it at first, then I freeze when I do. My eyes widen at the sight in front of me. It’s a blown-up photo of me and Beaumont. It’s the grainy picture of us on the balcony just a few days ago. Except where my body is, someone has taken red paint and written, whore.
Reaching for the poster-sized picture, I pull it away from the door, only to discover that there is another behind it. This one is crystal clear, it’s an image of me riding Beaumont in the back of the limo tinted SUV. Across my breasts in red the word slut is written.
Shoving my key in the door, I gather both posters and lug my suitcase behind me. Slamming the door closed, I lock it tightly and lean against it, closing my eyes with a trembling sigh.
Opening my eyes, I look around my living room trying to decide if someone has come into my house, they got as close as my front door, I know that much. Everything looks exactly the way I left it and I exhale.
My phone rings in my back pocket. Dropping the posters, I reach for my device and quickly answer it, assuming that it’s Beaumont to make sure that I made it home okay.
“Did you like the photos?” the feminine voice purrs.
“Who is this?” I snap, my nerves completely gone.
The voice laughs, it’s melodic, almost pretty if I wasn’t scared within an inch of my life. She hums then makes a clucking noise with her tongue.
“Just know that I’m keeping an eye on you. I don’t understand why he wants you. You’re nothing like his other women. Everything about you is completely opposite of every woman he’s ever desired, including me.”
“Maybe that’s what he likes?”
There’s a moment of silence, then I hear her grunt. “Maybe. Doubtful, but maybe. Just watch yourself, Hutton Baker. I would hate for you to get caught up in anything that you can’t handle.”
The line goes quiet and I glance down, seeing that whoever it is has ended the call. I try looking at the last incoming call, hoping that for some reason the caller ID will help me in some way. It doesn’t. It just reads Unknown Caller. Closing my eyes, I sink down to my ass, my back still against the door and I pinch my lips closed.
What feels like seconds later or it could be hours, I’m not sure, my cell rings again. This time, I look at the screen and see that it’s Beaumont calling me. I debate not answering him, I don’t want to tell him any of this, there’s nothing that he can do for me from where he is.
Against my better judgment, I answer his call, my craving to hear his voice too strong to resist.
“What’s wrong?” he demands immediately.
Clearing my throat, I lie to him. For all the truths that he’s told me, I choose to lie to him. It’s for his benefit, but I still feel like a complete jerk for doing it. I tell him that I’m just tired and that I’m going to go to bed early to try and make up for the lost sleep since I have to work in the morning.
“Miss you, darlin’ girl,” he murmurs, his voice a low sexy rasp.
Smiling through my teary eyes, I whisper back to him. “I miss you too, Beaumont. Wish I could have stayed,” I admit.
His voice rumbles and I wait for his next words, knowing that they’re going to make me want to run to a plane and fly back to him, immediately.
“You could have.”
“Two weeks,” I remind him.
My eyes move
toward the posters and I grimace at the sight of them. Whoever did this, they followed me somehow. They saw me at my most intimate and it makes me ill just thinking about the fact that they were watching me and Beaumont together.
This isn’t just some fan that took a picture and made a little money by selling it to the tabloids, this is something completely different, something sinister.
“Get some sleep. I’ll call you tomorrow when we’re stopped for the night. Brian and I are going to be working on a couple new songs.”
“Okay,” I whisper.
We end the call and I inhale a shaky breath. I debate calling the police, but decide against it. What are they going to do anyway? I don’t have any cameras that could have captured this person.
All I have are the posters with ugly words written on them, and a phone call that came from an unknown number. I’m not even sure any of it is really a crime. I bite the corner of my lip, trying to decide what I’m going to do.
Shaking my head, I reach across the floor and grab the posters. Without a second thought, I tear them in half. Then I tear that half in half, then again, and again, until my floor looks like it’s covered in confetti.
I don’t feel any better though.
I feel terrible. I feel sick to my stomach and all I want to do is stay locked inside of my bedroom, because there’s obviously a crazy person watching me.
Immediately, I think that it’s Chelle, or Rachelle as she introduced herself to me, but then how would she even know that I was in California over the weekend?
Staying on the floor, I don’t move, not for the rest of the night. I don’t sleep either, I can’t. If I do, then I know that someone is going to break into my house. Someone is watching me, after all.
This is going to be the longest two weeks of my life, because I know without a doubt that I will not sleep until I’m safe in Beaumont’s arms again.
BEAUMONT
Day after day, show after show.
Usually, I don’t feel like I’m in a hamster wheel until it’s nearing the end of a tour, not still in the beginning stages. But this entire tour is completely different from any other one that I’ve been on. Not just because I’m sober, but for a combination of reasons.
FRAUD: An Unfit Hero Novel Page 23
