That seals my decision. I did not get instructions not to touch anything.
I walk over to the desk and lower myself to the chair. My heart is beating so fast I’m afraid it will burst out of my chest. My hand shakes as I bring it over the mouse and push slightly.
All of a sudden, images fill the screens. It takes me a moment to understand what I’m looking at. When I do, a sense of vertigo hits me.
They are the feeds from all the security cameras in the house.
I see the spots Rose pointed out to me: the foyer, the multiple hallways, the kitchen. But, I also see some I didn’t know existed. There are six views of the sunroom. Four of my bathroom—including one right above the tub. I see my powder room from an unfamiliar angle. It takes me a moment to understand that the camera is behind the mirror.
A feeling of nausea overtakes me. I know that Stonehart controls all aspects of my life here—but I didn’t know just how thoroughly positioned the cameras are. There’s not an inch of unmonitored space anywhere in my prison. That means this whole time—the entire time I’ve been here—Stonehart has been monitoring my every move.
Revulsion and disgust rise in my chest. I push away from the desk. Not only have I been a prisoner, but I’ve also been on display, like some circus freak. My eyes dart to the screen showing my closet. He’s seen me changing. I look at the one depicting my pillar. He’s seen me crying. The displays shine menacingly at me. He’s seen everything.
My head begins to spin. I need to get away. I start to stand, when a cold voice stops me.
“Lilly.”
I freeze on the spot. All my muscles tighten in dread.
I turn around, dazed, like in a dream, and find Stonehart glowering at me from the doorway.
I’m too shocked for words. What is he doing here? He’s supposed to be away!
“Hello, Lilly,” he says. He looks me over. “It’s customary to respond to a greeting, you know.”
“H-hello,” I stammer. Stonehart’s voice is calm, but his eyes betray the danger lurking under the surface.
Stupid, stupid, stupid! I berate myself. I should never have come in here. Now that he’s caught me, I can’t begin to imagine what he’s going to do.
Stonehart walks into the room. He advances on me. I’m too frightened to move. My feet seem rooted to the floor.
His menacing scowl is too much for me to take. I avert my eyes and look straight down.
He stops in front of me. I can see the toes of his shoes. Black, sleek loafers with thin leather laces. Regular shoes. Normal shoes. Not the shoes of a maniac—
He touches my chin and lifts my head up. My breath hitches as I meet his eyes.
He looks at me for a long moment. I want to recoil from his touch, but I’m afraid that will only make everything worse.
“You’re trembling,” he observes. His voice is flat. “How come?”
“I-I don’t know,” I say.
He makes a displeased sound in his throat. “Don’t lie to me, Lilly.”
I swallow and look away. He jerks my head back.
“Are you scared?” he asks. I’d expect to find a hint of triumph in his voice, but I don’t. It’s as flat and emotionless as ever.
His eyes, on the other hand… there is a storm brewing behind those eyes that rivals the strongest winter gale.
My throat is too constricted for me to speak. I manage to nod, almost imperceptibly, while doing all I can to avoid meeting his gaze.
“Why?” he asks. His fingers tighten on my chin. “No lies this time, Lilly.”
“Y-y-your office,” I whimper. I sneak a peek around the room. “I’m in your office.”
Stonehart nods. A bloodless smile curls his lips. It is almost a sneer. “And you know you are not permitted in my office, don’t you?”
I close my eyes as a single tear leaks down. This is confirmation of my worst fear.
“Yes,” I breathe.
Stonehart lets me go. I brace myself for the oncoming slap… but it never comes.
Instead, I feel him turn away.
I crack open one eye. Stonehart’s back is to me. His hands are clasped together. He is looking at the monitors.
“You knew the rule about entering my office,” he says, “and yet, here you are.” He speaks without looking at me. “Please, Lilly, help me reconcile that disparity.”
I open my other eye. I’m still shaking. I feel like I’m standing in the middle of a frozen lake, right where the ice is thinnest. One wrong move, one improper word, and the cracks splintering beneath me will break.
“I can’t,” I whisper.
This time, Stonehart definitely sneers. “You can’t,” he repeats. “In that case, you have every right to feel scared, don’t you?” He turns around. His cruel eyes shine in the dark. “Since you disobeyed my rules.”
I try to swallow the enormous lump that’s taken up residence in my throat. I’m screwed. My fight-or-flight response has definitely gone haywire. I can’t fight or flight. I’m simply glued to the spot, utterly incapable of action.
I remember Stonehart’s words, warning me of what would happen if I broke his rules:
I will leave you in the dark.
I can’t—I can’t go there again. I can’t spend any more time chained to the pillar with an invisible leash. I can’t face the oppressing darkness a second time. I can’t. I just can’t!
“Of course,” Stonehart notes, turning on his heels and facing me with a victorious air, “There is one other possibility.”
I just look at him, not daring to speak.
“And that possibility, Lilly, is this.” He walks to me. I squeeze my eyes shut. He leans down, brushes my hair aside, and whispers in my ear, “This isn’t my office.”
A great wave of relief crashes over me. It breaks the stiff fear holding me up. I collapse into the chair.
Stonehart turns away and begins pacing in front of the screens. “Nevertheless,” he continues, “your guilty behavior tells me you would have gone behind my back and broken my rules when you thought I wasn’t present.”
“I—no, Jeremy, I wouldn’t—” I stammer.
“Quiet!” he snaps. “I don’t want to hear your moaning. The fact is: You knew you were forbidden from entering my office, and I find you here anyway, in what you thought was my office.” He glances at me. “That is almost as bad as the real thing.”
I shake my head, but no words come out.
“The question is,” he continues. “What am I going to do with you? I stuck to my word and gave you access to the estate. What do I find when I return? You, in the one place you thought I had forbidden you from entering!”
“Jeremy, please,” I start. “I didn’t—I was only in here for a second. I didn’t think… I didn’t know…”
“That I would return to find you here?” He wheels around. “No. I can see how you wouldn’t expect that. You think you’re so smart, don’t you? Sneaking around while I’m gone?”
“No, I promise. It wasn’t anything like that….”
Stonehart cuts off my protest with a sharp gesture. “I think,” he says slowly, “that it’s time I tell you a little story, Lilly.”
I inch back into the chair. He walks toward me and leans on the table. He crosses his legs and taps the desk with his fingers. “Where to start, where to start?” he says absently.
I watch him cautiously, unnerved by the very real possibility of an unpredictable reaction.
He spreads his arms and smiles all of a sudden. “I know!” he says, in an almost mocking manner. “Why don’t I start at the beginning?”
I can hear the blood thundering in my ears as he looks at me, searching for a reply.
“Okay,” I manage meekly.
“At the beginning,” he repeats. “Well, this is how the story begins, Lilly. Once, many years ago, there was a young boy. He had two older brothers, and a powerful father. He was smart, sharp, and ambitious. But, he possessed one great flaw.” Stonehart’s eyes shine at me. “Would
you like to guess what that flaw was?”
I shake my head in response. “I-I don’t know.”
“He was born last,” Stonehart says. His voice is soft and full of hate. “As the boy grew, he was passed over time and time again in favor of his brothers. Brothers who were slower, stupider, and less talented than he. But that made no difference to his father.”
Stonehart pauses, waiting for my response. When none is forthcoming, he continues. “The boy’s hatred festered. Only his mother saw him as a real person. The boy grew up and became a man. But, still, his father looked only upon his two brothers to continue the family legacy.”
Stonehart’s voice becomes deadly. “Do you know what happened in the end?”
I swallow and shake my head slightly. “What?”
“The little boy rose above all and crushed those who doubted him.” Stonehart’s forearms flex as he cracks his knuckles. “He learned the thrill of domination. More than that. Of vengeance.” He underscores the word.
A heavy silence falls between us. I can feel Stonehart’s eyes piercing into me. He’s waiting for my response.
“What happened next?” I venture softly.
“The greatest day of that boy’s life,” Stonehart says. “Years later, he met his father in the courtroom to conclude a hostile takeover of his company. The boy had changed his name. His father had no idea who was behind it. And when father and son met… well, the triumph the boy felt was worth every struggle of his life.”
“Why are you telling me this?” I whisper.
“Isn’t it obvious?” Stonehart asks. “It’s a warning, Lilly. You think I don’t know what you’re up to? You think I can’t guess what you were looking for in here? I told you the boy had grown to like vengeance. Well…” he pushes off the table and towers over me, “…traits that are reflected in oneself are easily recognizable in others.”
He knows, a small voice whispers in the back of my mind. He knows I intend to deceive him. He knows I mean to fight.
I suppress an uncomfortable shudder.
“Now.” He turns away from me and leans over the desk. “Let’s see what you were in here for, shall we?” His voice contains a dangerous quality.
“Jeremy, no,” I protest weakly. “We don’t have to do that…” He ignores me and starts tapping the keyboard.
A few of the displays light up with what looks to be a surveillance program. Stonehart moves the mouse to the calendar and clicks a date in early October. “Now, how about this, hmm?”
My gut tightens in anxiety as I see myself lying on the floor by the pillar. The screen is green from the camera’s night vision.
Stonehart looks back at me over his shoulder. “Your first day,” he says to me.
He fast-forwards until I start to stir. My stomach begins to writhe uncomfortably.
“Jeremy, please,” I beg. “We don’t have to watch—”
“Oh, but we do,” he interrupts. “Yes, we definitely do. Ah!” He stops the fast-forward and hits play. “My favorite part.”
I watch, horrified, as I see the television version of myself venturing past the boundary. I see myself stop a few steps outside of it. I flinch in real life as I remember the sharp zap under my left ear. The Lilly on the screen tenses, then, after a few moments, starts to walk forward again.
I almost yell at her to stop. Dread builds inside as I see myself take careless steps toward the curtain. I’m going to get shocked… I’m going to get shocked…
Stonehart pauses the tape just as my collar is about to send me writhing to the floor. He looks at me.
“Do you remember what happens next?”
Unconsciously, I finger the collar that’s so tight around my neck. “Jeremy, please…”
“This is why you’re here,” he says. “This is why you came into this room, isn’t it? Now watch.”
He presses play. I see myself collapse to the side and start thrashing on the ground. The video makes me relive all the horrible sensations. There’s no sound, but I can remember the pathetic, high-pitched squeal I made just before passing out.
Stonehart is looking intently at me. I want to rip my eyes from the screen, but I can’t. I know he wouldn’t be pleased.
My nails dig into the palms of my hands as I watch the horrific movie. I’m panting. My heart is pounding as if I expect the collar to shock me at any moment.
Finally, the Lilly in the video goes limp. I tear my eyes away.
“Did you enjoy that?” Stonehart asks. “I’ve got a whole collection, you know. Let’s see… what else might you be interested in? Oh.” His eyebrows go up. “I know.”
He turns his attention back to the surveillance software and starts searching for another date. This one is marked November 18th, 2013.
The monitors show me and him together in the sunroom. We’re sitting at a table, having dinner.
I know what is going to come next.
I can’t watch. I can’t watch him rape me on the table top. It’s too soon. The memory of that night is still fresh in my brain.
I need to get away.
I stand up. Stonehart notices.
“Sit down, Lilly,” he growls, “Or you’ll face worse consequences than a little video stream.”
My eyes dart to the open doorway. My chest is heaving. I never thought I would want to be back in the sunroom. But now, I wish for nothing more.
“I said, sit down!” Stonehart yells.
I cast one last, despairing look at the doorway. I need to get out of here. But, the longer I remain standing, the worse Stonehart’s anger is going to get.
Defeated, I plop back down on the seat.
He smiles. “Good. Now, watch.”
My entire body is shaking as I watch the video start to play.
“Wait,” Stonehart adds maliciously. “I forgot to add sound.”
He taps the keyboard, and, all of a sudden, our voices come from all around me:
‘How was your day?’ Stonehart asks on the video. There’s a pause in which I don’t answer, and then he says, “You look surprised. Lilly, it’s customary to reply to a polite inquiry at dinner.’
‘It was fine,’ I sputter. ‘How was yours?’
Stonehart’s expression changes to one of darkness. ‘Need I remind you of our rules?’
I cringe as the conversation plays out. A dull throbbing starts up in the back of my head. Apprehension grows inside.
‘…Of course I’m right,’ Stonehart says. ‘You’d be hard-pressed to find situations in which I’m not…’
My heart rate ratchets up. My breaths come faster and faster. Real-life Stonehart is watching me, making sure I keep my attention on the screen.
‘Jeremy?’ My voice shakes a little. ‘May I ask you a question?’
He picks up the wineglass on the table and peers into it. ‘Do you remember our rules?’
‘Yes.’
My palms feel clammy. Sweat is trickling down my back. I feel trapped, with Stonehart’s eyes on me. Cruel eyes. Monstrous eyes.
He knows what he is doing. He knows how hard this is to watch. And he’s reveling in my discomfort.
‘…Tell me what you need.’
‘I need… air!’
I watch as Stonehart loops his arm around television Lilly’s waist and starts to guide her outside. He looks so worried, so very compassionate…
‘…My sweet Lilly, the moment I change the range, you will be the first to know…’
“Please,” I beg. I can’t bear to watch. “Please, Jeremy, turn it off.”
“Off?” he frowns. “But this is my favorite part.”
He increases the volume
I hear myself yelling. I watch as I stalk to the table and throw the wine bottle at his head. I see the flash of anger on his face just before he grabs me.
I can almost feel his hands on me again. I’m trembling. The sounds of the on-screen struggle fill my ears. He’s grabbing my hair. I’m struggling against him.
I can’t believe I’m bein
g forced to live through this again.
I gasp onscreen and in real life as I see Stonehart rip my dress open. I feel light-headed and suddenly dizzy. I can feel Stonehart’s eyes boring into me, watching for my reaction. I can see him on the screen, groping, touching me, dominating me with his powerful masculinity, and…
And it’s too much. I cannot live through the moment again. My breathing is almost as fast as my heartbeat. I’m taking short little gasps. I’m vaguely aware they do not bring enough oxygen to my brain.
My eyes roll to the top of my head, my head lolls to one side, and I pass out.
Chapter Fifteen
I am having the most wonderful dream. I am back at Yale, surrounded by my friends. We’re picnicking out on the grass. The late spring sun warms us.
Fey is sunbathing with her eyes closed. I’m lying on my front, pretending to read a book while sneaking glances at Robin and his friends throwing a Frisbee back and forth.
The gorgeous gothic architecture around me sparkles in the sun. I close my eyes and breathe deep, knowing that nothing can ever harm me here…
Suddenly, I’m falling through the ground. I open my mouth to scream, but the rush of air stifles any noise.
I land in a tight box. I scramble up, but as I do, the lid slams shut. With it, all the warmth of my body seeps away. I feel like I’m trapped in an ice cube.
I can’t see anything. I reach out in front of me only to discover I can’t move my hands. They’re bound to my body by thick, heavy ropes.
It takes me a second to realize that no, I’m not bound by ropes. It’s the body of a massive boa constrictor that has me trapped.
A scream forms in my throat. Before it can come, something tightens around my neck. I start to choke. It’s another, smaller snake, coiling around my windpipe. It’s black, almost like an eel, with red, evil eyes… though how I know that in the dark, I cannot say.
It tightens and tightens around my throat. I cannot breathe. I’m suffocating. I’m dying. I’m—
Uncovering You: The Complete Series (Mega Box Set) Page 15
