“Can I take the jacket off at least? It’s probably why I’m losing so much. I can’t focus all stuffy in this suit. My mojo is off.”
I sigh and pat him on the shoulder allowing my hand to slide down the arm. “I guess, but forewarning, this suit is hot on you. It makes me want to do things.”
His eyes light up. “Oh yeah, what kind of things?”
“Take it off and you’ll never know.”
He groans and throws his head back looking to the ceiling. “You’re killing me, Kitten. There are many places in this building where you could give me a preview.”
Patting his chest twice, I laugh. “Not on your life, Tiger, but maybe when we get back to the condo I’ll give you the full show.”
“You shouldn’t stand on your ankle for too long, Marissa. If we stay here the entire time, it could cause a reinjury.” He puts on his best concerned face and two eyebrows go up for extra emphasis.
“Nice try, but you’re a month too late. We’re here to support Clare and the center. I suggested this event. I can’t leave early.”
“Fine.” He grumbles a few words under his breath I don’t make out. “But as soon as it’s time, let’s go back to my place.”
“No, let’s go back to mine.” I picked up a few piles of clothes from my bedroom this afternoon.
He cocks his head down at me. “I’m pretty sure your place is technically still mine.”
Over time I’ve perfected “the look.” You know, the one every girlfriend should be able to shoot to their significant other any time they're being ridiculous. It’s the face Ryland gets now.
It’s time for me to burst his bubble even more. “No can do, Captain. Aspen wants everyone to go to The View.”
The View is a small restaurant on top of the Marriott in the Financial District, which prides itself on their spectacular view of the San Francisco skyline. I’ve wanted to go for the past four years but haven’t made the time. I'm excited to experience what everyone talks about when you see the city with her lights on. I like to do the touristy thing even if I’m a local at this point.
“Why?” he asks.
“The view, obviously. Also real food and to celebrate. It will be fun, I promise.”
“And if it’s not?”
I try to think of a bribe to get him enthusiastic. “If you don’t have the time of your life, I’ll let you break out the handcuffs again."
“Deal.” His agreement is fast and easy. Too fast and too easy. Little does he know I enjoyed the handcuffs as much as he did. Either way I win.
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
“Have I told you how much I love the gold heels, Aspen?” I ask as we stand on the packed elevator together.
She sticks her foot out and twist. “Thanks.”
Next time I get to dress up, I’m going with heels. Aspen’s at least three inches taller with the gold ones. My closet is sparse when it comes to high shoes because Cody hated it when I stood over him. I bet with a pair of stilettos I'd barely pass Ryland’s chin. There’s a whole new world of fashion available to me.
We step off the elevator and even at the late hour The View is full of people. Most stand around the large open windows, but a few mingle in the middle by the circular bar with leather chairs.
“Wow, we’ll never find a place to sit, Aspen.” Heels or not my feet are tired.
She practically skips off the elevator. I guess the shoes aren’t bothering her after all. “Don’t worry, Finn had a table reserved."
“Damn it.” Ryland’s curse is quiet, but he’s close enough I hear it.
“What?” I ask leading him to the side away from the rest of the group.
He lets go of me and runs a hand though his short hair. “A table? Marissa, you girls will be here gossiping all night.”
“We do not gossip. We chat,” I refute.
He takes off his jacket and loosens his tie. I’m surprised he lasted this long. “You’re lucky I love you, Kitten. I wouldn't do this for anyone else.”
Ryland’s said I love you before, but every time the words create these weird warm fuzzy feelings. I want to wrap my arms around him, climb him like the tree he is, and partake in a PDA of epic proportions. Of course I’ll never do it. Such an act would ruin the man-hater reputation I've worked hard to create in our group of friends.
Blinking lights from one of the taller buildings outside the window catch my attention. I pull Ryland to the little area our group’s claimed with a table and two dark leather couches.
We tend to create chaos whenever we go out together and tonight’s the same story. Aspen and Finn sit on the couch without an issue, but Trey appears to argue with a waiter over the menu. I catch small pieces from the waiter reassuring him Finn’s already ordered food, but it doesn't appease Trey who continues to debate. Simone sits on the couch looking in every direction but at her boyfriend in a cute attempt to distance herself from him.
“Is Trey trying to order a steak?” I ask Simone when he continues to fight with the waiter. “Didn’t the waiter tell him Finn already placed orders?”
She shakes her head. “It doesn’t matter. You have no idea. Trey believes he should be able to order a good steak anywhere.”
“Really?” I can’t imagine what it would be like to date Trey. I’d probably end up stabbing him with a salad fork at dinner one night.
“I’ve seen him eat steak on the beach.” Trey gives up on his argument and sits down on the couch next to Simone. She pats him on the knee a few times, a special kind of condescending comfort.
I’m about to ask if he succeeded in his quest for meat when Ryland stops behind me and I step back so I’m closer to his body. “We should go to the beach."
“I like this idea. Someplace warm.” I have over twenty days of vacation time saved up. It wouldn’t take much for Ryland to persuade me into a vacation.
He sighs and it blows my hair. “We’d need to do it now. Once I sign with a team, the season lasts ten months or more. There won’t be much time for vacations."
Our conversation lulls until Ryland rests his chin on the top of my head and I look out at the twinkling lights from here to the bay. “Aren’t the lights beautiful?”
“Sure,” he replies without the proper amount of enthusiasm and I stick an elbow into his side… lightly. “What? It’s a bunch of lights on buildings, Marissa. Can we go home now?”
“No.” I glance around us again, looking for a certain person whom I can’t find. “Where’s Grant and Clare? Weren’t they in the taxi right behind us?”
Ryland shrugs but then turns to Finn asking him across the few feet between us. The three guys discuss a get together they’re having next month on the fourth of May until Finn’s phone chimes with an incoming text.
“Grant and Clare had a mix up. They’re grabbing a drink and then they’ll meet us here. They’re on the other side of Mission. Had a problem with the driver.”
“Didn’t you give all the taxis the same directions?” Aspen asks.
Finn shrugs. “Yeah. I guess theirs went the wrong way.”
I bet they had a problem with their driver. I also know exactly what Grant plans to use his hour for… wooing Clare.
“It’d be cute if Grant and Clare end up together. We’d have a complete little group.” Simone leans across the table grabbing a piece of cheesy bread an employee dropped off during the search for Grant.
Aspen and I cast one another a glance. “That’s because you haven’t been around Grant enough. He’s not a one-woman kind of guy.”
“It’s not that bad, Marissa.” Aspen waves a hand in front of her dispelling my concerns.
“Well it’s not as good either. What if he pulls the typical Grant move and forgets to call her?” No one refutes my argument. "If those two get together tonight, it could end extremely bad.”
“Are you ladies going to join us for our May fourth celebration?” Finn leans over and breaks up our conversation.
“May fourth?” Simone asks looking to Trey
for an answer.
He stares at her for a second. “May the fourth be with you. Star Wars. How do you not know this already?” We all shrug. “Every year we get together and watch the movies. This year Finn suggested we watch them in story order rather than production.”
Aspen, Simone, and I stare at him. “I have no idea what you’re saying.” Aspen states what I’m sure we were all thinking.
Finn sighs. “The first three they made are actually the last three. You switch them to watch it in order.”
“So the first movie is actually the fourth?” Aspen asks.
“Yes.” Finn nods his head like he’s proud Aspen figured it out, but I bet she’s still as confused as I am.
“You start with the fourth movie? So the fourth is the first?” She asks.
“No, the fourth is the fourth, but it’s the first in the story.” Finn pats her on the leg.
“Then why isn’t it considered the first?” I ask, not sure about this guy logic.
“Because it was made fourth.” Trey jumps back in the conversation, his voice rising in irritation.
I scan the muddled faces of my friends. “I’m confused.” I look to Ryland for help since he’s been quiet during our back and forth. He remains silent, but a small grin slowly grows on his face.
“Me too.” Simone leans back on the couch, her fingers held up ticking them off as she works through it in her head.
“Don’t worry. You three are no longer invited.” Trey reaches to the table grabbing his glass of a dark colored liquor and leans back as if the discussion is over.
Simone hits him in the arm with the back of her hand once. “Hey, you can’t kick us out.”
“Simone,” Aspen draws her name out, “do we really want to spend an entire day watching ten Star Wars movies?”
“Hmmm…no,” she answers.
Ryland leans into me squeezing my side with his hand. “Technically it’s seven movies and we should consider watching the new one first.”
Finn thinks for a moment and then nods, and Trey agrees.
“Wait. So now the seventh movie will be the first?” Simone can’t let it go.
Trey groans and throws his head back placing a hand at his hairline. “We need to stop talking about this.”
Simone and Trey start to argue back and forth over whether she’s allowed at Star Wars day. I’m still confused on why she even wants to be there.
I lean back into Ryland and whisper. “Are you going to this movie day?”
“Yeah, I haven’t been able to go since college.” He pauses in thought for a minute. “Do you think you’ll be able to go that long without me?”
I put on my best sad face. “It will be hard, but I’ll manage…somehow,” I answer sarcastically.
“Will you really move with me when I sign to a new team? Away from your friends? I’ll practice every day during the week and then travel for games.”
Is he trying to talk me out of it? “Sure, and who knows. Maybe you’ll get an offer from an American team.”
He laughs, but it’s humorless. “Oh there’ve been offers from American teams, but they don’t have the budget or the record of a team I want to play for. I won’t sign with an American team, Marissa.” His eyes cast down to the floor, maybe waiting for me to argue.
“Oh.” It’s probably not the answer he wanted, but it’s all I have. I’d kind of secretively been holding out hope he’d sign for one of the close local teams. I’ve spent a few minutes… okay hours at work researching the different teams he could play for here in the states.
He turns me in his arms so we’re chest to chest. “I have to make sure you’re okay with this, Marissa. It will be a new country with a sport that takes up the majority of a player's time, but I want you at my games. I need someone’s support. I need your support if we do this.”
What he isn’t saying out loud is he’s pretty much asking me to give up everything to follow him around the globe while he makes a shit load of money to kick a ball into a net.
“You must be one hundred percent in with me.” He breaks into my thoughts.
Am I willing to be one hundred percent with Ryland on this? Give up my life here to focus on him? For a few seconds I panic, but it doesn’t last long until I realize I am. It’s probably crazy and there might come a time when I kick myself, but I want to at least give this thing between us a shot. I want to enjoy this burrito in life. I can always find a new job in marketing, but how often will I get the chance to follow my soccer star boyfriend to new places?
When I raise my head and meet his eyes, my answer is as easy as the smile growing on my face. “I’m in, Ryland.”
“For real?” His self-doubt creeps into the question.
“For real. It will be an adjustment for sure, but I’ll give it a shot.” And who knows maybe he’ll end up in Mexico. I could practically jump across the border with a quick flight to San Francisco when I need to.
I promised to never make a decision based on a guy again, but here I am jumping in with both feet. Isn’t that what life is about? What good is love if you can’t follow your heart and see where the journey leads you? Ryland makes me want to throw caution to the wind and follow him to the ends of the earth. It’s time for me to take the plunge and not look back.
A year ago I thought I loved Cody, but now I understand our relationship for what it was. Comfort. This thing… the pit at the base of my stomach that tightens whenever Ryland’s near, is all consuming. It’s not about what our relationship looks like on the outside, but about what we feel on the inside. I want Ryland to be happy, and I want it to be me who makes him happy.
Soccer’s important to him. Ryland’s done a good job of hiding it, but there’s more going on at his place than he realizes. I've seen him watching the highlight reels after games. The notifications he gets on his phone of scores or other soccer news. He pretends he’s walked away from the game, but it’s there, waiting to remind him what he's missing every day.
Sometimes after he checks his phone and he’s reading a highlight, his eyes gloss over. During others his nose scrunches up from reading an article I presume he finds displeasing. I’ve walked in on the phone calls with teammates while they're discussing another player or other team drama. He might not be on the roster for United any longer, but he’ll always be a part of the team.
I’ve never felt such devotion to anything related to marketing in the same way. There are one to two coworkers I may keep in touch with, but I won’t miss much from the office. It may seem like a hard decision for some, but I’m getting the chance to trade in my grey cubical and travel the world with a guy I love. In the end, the decision’s an easy one.
“And I only have a few more years of playing left. Five, maybe ten tops. Then we’ll retire wherever you want.”
“I’ll be okay, Ryland.” I laugh and grab on to a piece of his black shirt. “We’ll come back here and you can coach the kids at the center in your free time. You know, when you aren’t kayaking in the living room.”
He laughs with me over the memory. “The kids have been fun.” He reaches up and rubs his hand over his short hair.
“You’re a good coach. Even Clare says you have a way with the kids.”
He stares out into the expanse of city in front of us lost in thought. A light from the large open window catches his eye, causing him to blink, and I can’t stop myself from squeezing him tighter. I won’t interrupt our moment to ask what he's thinking about, but my own thoughts wander to our future.
Our server — who delivered Trey a steak about an hour ago — picks up the last of our dirty dishes and drink glasses with a reminder the restaurant closes in ten minutes.
The six of us stand and start the walk to the elevator, Aspen not as graceful on her three-inch heels after a long night and four glasses of wine. Two people who should be in our group are still conspicuously missing. Grant and Clare never showed, despite his texts to Finn they were getting one drink and then catching a new cab.
Ryland lets everyone else on the elevator before us and pulls me to the side to wait for the next one. “All right, Marissa, I had fun tonight but it wasn’t everything you promised. You have an appointment with a pair of cuffs.” His smile is wicked and teasing as he stares down at me.
I yawn in a dramatic fashion with a hand over my mouth. “But, Ryland, it’s so late. Aren’t you exhausted?”
The elevator door opens in front of us. “We’ll get you a coffee on the way home.” With our fingers twined together, he pulls me with him into the space. He waits for the doors to close again before he leans down, taking my face in both his hands and kissing me.
I brace myself against the wall expecting more, but he pulls away and we’re standing side by side like a nice normal couple before the doors open on the first floor where everyone else waits for us.
CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE
I fall off Ryland and roll to my back on the empty side of the bed in my apartment. My thick rose bedspread balls up in the center of my back making it uncomfortable, but I’m too exhausted to move. Ryland's found the guaranteed way to wake me up before ten on a Saturday.
Ryland slides down the bed to rest his head on a pillow rather than the half seated way he had leaned against the headboard. His position matches mine as he settles and sprawls out. With what little energy I have left, I rub my hand down his naked chest feeling every muscle along the way.
“You get much lower and we’re going to do it all over again.” Ryland’s words come in little puffs as he works to control his breathing.
I snatch my hand away and groan with a large breath blowing a piece of hair off my face. “I need until at least…” I glance at the clock next to the bed and release another groan at the eight a.m. hour. “Noon.”
He laughs as if I’m kidding and rolls to his side pulling me up against him. We stay like this until both our chests stop heaving from exertion. I tuck my head further in his underarm snuggling in to catch a few more hours of sleep.
“Would you be okay if we get married wherever we’re living, or do you want to plan a ceremony back here?”
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