by Amira Rain
It also wasn't her fault that I'd been outside when the sirens went off, and it certainly wasn't her fault that her protective, caring nature had made her dash out to make sure I was okay. Additionally, it wasn't her fault that the house guards had been wherever they'd been at the time. Considering what could have happened, I definitely understood her inclination to apologize; however, at the same time, I didn't think she had a single thing to be sorry for.
Fortunately, Samuel and Grant seemed to agree with me. While Samuel scooped up the boys into his arms, his auburn hair glinting in a shaft of sunlight, he glanced at Mil and told her to hush, his voice thick with what sounded like complete forgiveness and tenderness.
Grant took her hand, pulled her up from her chair, and gave her a quick, tight, squeeze with his mouth near her ear. "What Samuel said. Hush, Aunt Mil. And just know that I'm very grateful for you making sure Lila was okay."
After releasing a sniffling Mil, who seemed to be stoically blinking back her tears, Grant came over to me and pulled me out of my chair and into his strong arms. I wrapped my arms around his neck and pressed the side of my face against his hard chest, inhaling his clean, woodsy scent. I always felt like I couldn't get enough of it. I also felt the same about Adrian's scent, which was similar, though maybe just faintly citrusy.
Over the previous several weeks, I'd begun to feel not only addicted to both of their scents, but both of them, period. I loved them both, and that love was beginning to run very deep for both of them. Both of them also seemed to have developed the same kind of deep love for me.
I'd thought that over time, my choice as to who I would pick to be my mate for life would almost make itself. I'd thought that I would simply develop stronger feelings for one brother over the other, and for a short while, that more or less seemed to be the case. I'd seemed to be more preoccupied with thoughts of Grant than thoughts of Adrian, and my feelings for Grant had seemed to be stronger.
But while those strong feelings for Grant hadn't changed, my feelings for Adrian had greatly intensified to reach the same level. Now I didn't think I could choose which brother I loved more if my life depended on it. Which was, of course, a problem. Because I knew that eventually, I would have to choose. I dreaded it. I had no idea how I was going to do it. Not without breaking my own heart and the heart of whichever brother I didn't pick.
Over the previous weeks, no one had brought up the subject of me making a choice. Not Grant, not Adrian, and not Mil. Even Fiona, who'd I'd become very good friends with, hadn't even brought it up.
I knew everyone had been too preoccupied with the wolf situation to think about much else, but I also knew this likely wouldn't always be the case. Once Grant and his men were able to take out all the wolves for good, however they were going to do that, and once things in the city returned to some level of normalcy, I knew I'd be called on to make a choice. This made me feel just the tiniest bit grateful for all the havoc and distraction the wolves had been causing.
Still holding me close, Grant moved his mouth to my ear. "We came flying back here the moment we heard the sirens. We were so worried about you. Are sure you're okay?"
I nodded without opening my eyes or lifting the side of my face from his chest. "I'm completely fine."
Being held in his strong arms was my favorite place in the world to be. Or, at least, one of my favorite places in the world, to be. My other favorite place to be was in Adrian's strong arms. I supposed that being held by both of them at once had to be my very favorite place to be.
Soon, I was in that heavenly place. I caught a whiff of Adrian's scent and felt him wrap an arm around my waist and pull the side of my body close to his, even while Grant still held me tightly. Adrian pressed a kiss to my cheek and I went near-completely limp, sure I'd melt to the floor without the strong arms around me holding me up.
I’d heard Mil, Samuel, and the boys leave the parlor, Mil saying that they should go get the boys some breakfast in the chef's kitchen, and Samuel saying that sounded like a plan. So now, Grant, Adrian, and I were locked in embrace, the three of us, alone. I assumed the two house guards were back in the family quarters, taking care of the wolf carcass.
After several more moments of just reveling in the feeling of being held by both Grant and Adrian, I lifted my face from Grant's chest, wanting him to kiss me. Honestly wanting him to kiss me then maybe even take me by the hand and lead me up to my rooms, along with Adrian. Then, I wanted them to both make love to me and bring me to the heights of ecstasy like they always did.
Despite the fact that they brought me to those heights numerous times the night before, and despite the upsetting events of the morning, I realized that I now wanted them both badly, and this feeling had developed just from the two of them holding me close against their long, hard bodies.
Which didn't really surprise me. It never took much to get me hungry and turned on for intimacy with Grant and Adrian. Since arriving in Sun Creek, I'd discovered that my appetite for intimacy could be pretty off-the-charts, which seemed to please Grant and Adrian to no end. As shifters, their own appetites were pretty off-the-charts.
That particular morning, the three of us never made it up to my bedroom. Not even close. Grant didn't even get the chance to give me the kiss I wanted. And that was because the moment I lifted my face, loud snarling and growling sounded from somewhere very nearby outside, beyond the parlor windows.
Making a little gasp, I whipped my face toward the windows. "What was that?"
I couldn't see anything through the thick foliage of the trees on the side yard.
Grant squeezed me tighter and kissed my cheek. "The tower spotters saw two wolves, the big northern one dead in the family quarters, and a smaller one from Stony Rapids. It sounds like some of my men are taking care of him out in the yard right now. They're probably doing just fine, but Adrian and I should go out there and make sure."
After Grant gave me a kiss that was far too brief for my liking, and then after Adrian did the same, the two of them left. I went up to my rooms, where I spent the morning doing some cleaning, trying not to think about how I was going to eventually have to make a decision about which brother I wanted to be my mate for life.
That afternoon, under guard escort, I went with Fiona to her studio to work on some pottery projects. I'd been working on my craft, getting better and better at it, and more and more excited about the prospect of having my own business once I felt like my pieces were up to a high enough standard. Fiona kept telling me they already were.
However, on this day, even intense work and excitement wasn't enough to keep my mind from the two brothers I loved.
Late in the afternoon, Fiona seemed to notice my distraction and came over to my workstation from her own, where she'd been putting the finishing touches on a watercolor painting to add to her collection of work to sell.
She pulled over a paint-splattered bar stool, had a seat, and looked at me with her big brown eyes twinkling. "I know it's not even four yet, but you look like you could use a glass of wine or something. And I do keep an 'emergency' bottle in the back for times when I'm working late and just need a little splash. Just so you know."
I scooted my chair back from my workstation with a sigh, working to pull the sides of my mouth up in some sort of smile. "Thanks. I'm just about done here. I guess I'll probably be heading back to the house soon. Kind of tired."
That was no lie. However, I wasn't planning on going to bed early that night. Because of the wolf attacks, Grant and Adrian had been leading patrols in the evenings and coming home pretty late, and I intended to wait up for them.
Fiona crossed her long legs and clasped one of her knees, her expression becoming more serious. "Are you worried about the wolf attacks? Because I know it's been stressful, but just trust me. Grant will have everything resolved soon. I know he, Adrian, Samuel, and Steven are formulating some sort of plan that they're going to propose to the council tomorrow evening.
“It’s a plan to take care of t
he Stony Rapids wolves once and for all, just like the wolves from Howell. So, try not to worry. We won't always have to walk around with guards, and we won't always have to hear sirens blasting off all the time and all that.
“And in the meantime, I know Grant and the other men are going to keep us, and everyone else in the community, perfectly safe."
I nodded, folding my arms across my chest and sitting back in my chair. "I know. And you're right that all this stuff with the wolves has been stressful and...just kind of low-level upsetting lately, I guess. But that isn't really even the main thing that's been bugging me today."
"Then, what is it? What's wrong?"
I blew my dark, side-swept bangs out of my face, thinking that the answer to her question felt like everything. "Grant and Adrian. Long story short, I love them both, and they both love me. I know that after the wolf situation is dealt with, I'll probably be asked to make a choice between them. I'm just...I'm dreading it. And dreading it more and more as time goes by."
Fiona's chocolate-brown eyes darted to the side for a moment.
"Well...maybe you'll have to make a choice, maybe not."
"What do you mean?"
She glanced to the side again before returning her gaze to my face. "Well, I guess I could mean a few different things, but my first thought is that maybe fate might make your decision for you."
"Well...how? Again, what do you mean?"
She tucked a long brown curl behind one ear, giving me a little smile. "Well, I'm just assuming that whoever gets you pregnant first...maybe that man will just naturally become the man you decide to marry. Maybe it'll just seem right and you won't even have to think about it. So, maybe fate will decide." Fiona paused, getting a little gleam in her dark eyes. "And just judging by how...um, I'll say, active the three of you seem to be...maybe fate will even decide soon."
A little heat instantly rose to my cheeks, and Fiona threw her head back, laughing.
"Well, it's not like it's some big, huge secret. The family cabin is big, yes...but not so big that people don't hear little things sometimes. The three of you can be awfully loud."
Now my face flamed, because I knew that Grant, Adrian, and I could be awfully loud. I especially could be awfully loud. I just hadn't thought any of that loudness could possibly be audible in other parts of the palatial cabin-mansion.
Fiona laughed again, clearly delighting in my discomfort. I rolled my eyes at her, not even caring that the action was probably more than a bit immature.
But suddenly, I stopped in mid-eye roll and slowly sat up a little straighter in my chair.
"Oh, my gosh. Oh...." I sank back in my chair again, with a sinking feeling in my stomach as well. "Oh, no."
I absolutely could not believe that what I was thinking right then had never even crossed my mind before.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
Leaning forward on her bar stool a little, still with her legs crossed, clasping one knee, Fiona frowned at me. "'Oh, no' what?"
I gave my head a little shake, snorting. "So stupid. Cannot believe this is literally the first time this has crossed my mind. What if I actually do get pregnant sometime soon? How are we even going to tell whose baby it is?" Sighing, I gave my head another quick shake. "How...how awkward. To say the very least."
I supposed it hadn't crossed my mind because even though fertility, which had been in steep decline post-Freeze, was now on the rise again, a woman becoming pregnant after only a month or two of intimacy was still kind of a rare thing. It just hadn't occurred to me to expect otherwise. Not to mention, my mind had been on other things since I'd arrived in Sun Creek.
Fiona gave me a little smile, her pearly teeth sparkling in late-day sun coming in through the wide studio windows. "It wouldn't really be awkward at all, though. And that's because if you do get pregnant, you can find out right away who the father of the baby is. I do mean right away. You can find out probably the very day you get a positive pregnancy test.”
"But how? How is that even possible?"
"Easy. The scientists in Ashcrest developed a blood test that can determine paternity from the moment a woman is pregnant enough to turn a test positive. Now, our doctors here in Sun Creek have the technology, too.
“So, on the chance you do get pregnant soon, it really won't be a big deal, and maybe it'd even help you make the choice you're stressing about. Maybe fate will kind of pick Grant or Adrian for you."
I thought for a few moments, mulling over her words. I couldn't deny that there was something kind of appealing about the prospect of fate making my decision for me.
At the same time, there was something kind of unsettling, even vaguely panic-inducing, about it as well.
Just then, the city's alarm sirens blared for the second time that day, startling me out of my thoughts. Kind of startling me into some rational thinking, too.
Looking at Fiona, I raised my voice to be heard above the sirens. "Honestly, I know there's a chance that fate could step in, but it's really a very small one. More than likely, after I finally make my choice between Grant and Adrian, it'll be a year or two, maybe even more, before I become pregnant.
“So, I guess I'm back to square one with a choice to make. Which is fine. At least I have more time to think and get to know Grant and Adrian even better. Because I know no one's going to press me to make a decision with all this wolf stuff still going on."
While the guards outside the studio shifted into bear form, growling, I got up to lock the front door, as Grant had told me to always do whenever the sirens sounded.
For the next half-hour or so, until the sirens stopped, Fiona and I continued work on different projects silently, not really able to talk any further because of all the noise. On our way home, we didn't really talk much, either, both of us having splitting headaches because of the sirens.
That night, I waited up for Grant and Adrian. My headache was gone, and my thoughts were now focused on picking up where the three of us had left off that morning, when I'd been in their arms. When I'd wanted Grant to kiss me.
But, around midnight, they still hadn't come home, and I fell asleep, disappointed. Disappointed and unsatisfied.
The next night, when the council meeting went on until the wee hours of the morning, I fell asleep disappointed and unsatisfied again.
By the following day, although I understood that Grant and Adrian were very much needed to deal with the wolves, and it wasn't like they were out on the town having fun, I was feeling more than a bit neglected. I hadn't even seen Grant and Adrian for a meal.
There was no doubt I missed them physically. I missed our intimacy. I missed the profound sexual satisfaction, satisfaction on a level I never dreamed possible, that they both gave me.
However, that wasn't all I missed. I missed them, period. I just missed being around them. I missed Adrian's joking and lighthearted banter. I missed how he made me laugh. I missed the way he often picked me right up off my feet when he pulled me into his arms. I missed Grant's quiet, protective presence. I missed the way he looked at me sometimes. Which was intently, his pale blue eyes like tranquil twin pools, but with the faintest hint of a smile playing around the edges of his full mouth. It was a look that made me feel I was cherished and loved, and I knew I was. By both him and Adrian.
That evening, the two of them finally came home early enough for dinner, which we ate in the family quarters, along with Mil, Fiona, Bennett, Samuel, and the boys. As was usual, I sat to the side of Grant, who sat at the head of the table, and Adrian sat across from me.
I could hardly eat my meal. With Grant and Adrian in such close proximity, I could hardly even think. I could barely even taste my food. Shifting my gaze between them, I was riveted to them both. I was riveted to their similar heavy-lidded eyes, and their muscular biceps that peeked out from the sleeves of their dark t-shirts. I was riveted by the way the flames from two tall, cream-colored taper candles in the center of the table seemed to make their skin glow.
Judging by the lo
oks they were both giving me under their dark lashes, Grant and Adrian were pretty riveted by me, too. And like me, they both seemed to be not very interested in food at the moment.
After several minutes, Mil set her fork down, looking from Adrian to Grant to me. "No one likes maple-glazed pork tenderloin anymore?"
Though she often let Mary, the chef, do a lot of the cooking, Mil was an excellent cook herself, and on the nights she made dinner, she liked to see everyone tuck in and really enjoy it.
Giving her what I hoped was an encouraging smile, I speared a piece of tenderloin with my fork. "It's delicious, Mil. Really, it is."
Really, it was. I popped the bite in my mouth, then cut and speared another, trying to chew enthusiastically, if that could even be possible. Grant and Adrian did the same, taking large bites and nodding with seeming approval while they chewed.
