by Myra Scott
“Wow,” Devin mused, shaking his head. “I can’t imagine. I mean, I always thought I was going to be a psychiatrist, but…” he paused, and I could tell he was holding something back. “Wouldn’t have really been my ‘thing’ either, I don’t think,” he finally finished.
“I could see that, though,” I said, leaning forward. “You’ve got a kind of soothing presence to you.”
“Soothing, huh?” he said, blushing again and smiling. “That’s something I don’t hear much as a blackjack dealer.”
“Maybe you should take a little more time off then,” I said, letting my eyes get a little more lidded, and when he scooted closer to me, I didn’t stop him.
I liked Devin. There was something comforting about his presence, a kind of sincerity I didn’t get to see much in my day-to-day life. Sure, we were at ease with each other too, but I’d never really given it much thought.
“Only if it means we can get drinks a little more often,” he said, and I opened my mouth to respond, but the words caught in my throat when I saw someone walk through the doors at the far end of the club.
It was two someones: Zane and Diego.
All the comfort and ease I had been feeling melted away from me in an instant, and my face fell. Devin must have noticed, because his face fell too, and he turned to see the two of them coming in.
“Oh, come on,” he groaned under his breath.
“I know,” I growled.
The two of them were arm in arm, laughing to each other about some inside joke as they strode in and headed straight for the bar. It looked like they’d already had a few drinks. That, or they were having such a good time they looked drunk.
I couldn’t help it. Every time I saw the two of them together and happy, it felt like a knife was getting twisted into my heart.
I felt Devin’s eyes on me, and I looked over to him. He looked worried, sad, and disappointed all at the same time.
“I know they own the place, but they don’t have to strut around like they do, flaunting it in all our faces,” I said, sitting back and taking a long sip of my drink.
“Just ignore them,” Devin pleaded with me. “We’re having a good time, don’t let Zane get in the way.”
“Zane’s not the problem,” I said. “It’s Diego. Everything was fine until that Spaniard decided to dig his claws into our neck of the woods. Doesn’t matter if we’re working with him or against him, he’s going to be the end of us.”
Devin gave me a less certain look, frowning. “It looks like it’s been good for business, all in all.”
I shot him a look, and he glanced away, sipping his drink.
“If I’m totally honest, Gage,” he said slowly, “it sounds like there’s more going on than just the business with how you feel.”
I let out a long, wistful sigh, my eyes still on Zane. The two of them didn’t even know we were here, and they probably wouldn’t notice all night.
“Yeah, I can’t lie about that to you,” I admitted, and that seemed to make Devin feel a little better. “It can’t be a huge secret. I’ve had my eyes on Zane since we first met in that bar in Madrid.”
“That’s a pretty romantic start,” he said. “Just the two of you?”
“No,” I said after a swig of my drink that was finally starting to numb some of the jealousy raging in me. “It’s always been the four of us, everywhere we go. Me, Mick, Bart, and Zane.”
“Zane and Mick have gone off to do their own things, it seems like,” he said cautiously. “Maybe they think the friendship you all have is a little too valuable to risk.”
“What are you saying?” I half-scoffed, raising an eyebrow at him, but to my surprise, Devin didn’t back down.
“You need to let Zane go, Gage,” he said softly, in a voice that was like soothing water on my fiery soul. I didn’t want to be soothed, though, I wanted to be angry. I underestimated Devin though—he was more of a therapist than a psychiatrist at heart.
“I don’t know,” I said with a wistful huff. “I just wish he’d acknowledge me, or maybe show that he knows how I feel about him. It’s almost like he’s going out of his way to ignore me, and that makes it worse. You have no idea what it’s like to have someone so close to you that you care about just completely head-over-heels for someone else.”
“Yeah,” he mumbled, “can’t imagine.”
I glanced over at him, softening my expression, and he met my gaze. “What about you, though? Is there anyone you’ve been pining after since you’ve been working here? We’ve drawn a bigger gay crowd than most of the casinos on the Strip can boast.”
He was silent for a moment, then softly said, “Yeah, there’s a guy. I think I’m getting friend-zoned, though.”
CHAPTER SEVEN - DEVIN
“Friend-zoned?” Gage repeated, raising an eyebrow as he sipped his drink. “Wow. Haven’t heard that term used in a long time.”
“Yeah, I mean, I guess it is kind of juvenile,” I agreed softly. “But it’s the most appropriate word for what the situation is, I think.”
“How long have you been inside that friend zone? A long time?” he prodded. I knew he was just making polite conversation, and that he wasn’t really all that interested in my love life, or lack thereof. But considering the fact that I was talking about him, I supposed it was a good thing that he wasn’t trying too hard to get to the truth. If he hadn’t caught on by now that I had feelings for him, then he probably never would. He was totally oblivious, too distracted by his drama with Zane to pay attention to anything or anyone else.
“Oh, quite a while,” I replied, nodding.
“Really? Huh. I never knew that about you,” he remarked.
“It’s not exactly the kind of thing we usually talk about together,” I said.
Gage gave me a wry smile. “Well, to be fair, when we’re together we don’t usually do a whole lot of talking, to begin with,” he replied in an undertone.
I could feel my cheeks burning and I hoped it wasn’t super obvious in the low light. “That’s true,” I conceded. “But even if we had been just talking, I doubt this particular subject would have come up.”
“Why’s that?” he probed. His tone was casual, and I knew he wasn’t trying to really pick away at my secrets, but he was just trying to keep the conversation going.
“Uh, well, I don’t tell most people about my… my feelings,” I admitted. And that wasn’t really just an excuse. It was also kind of true.
“So, you don’t have anyone to confide in? I thought we were close enough for you to tell me at least some of your secrets,” he teased lightly.
I forced a nervous smile. “Well, um…”
“Besides, it’s only fair, considering the fact that you know how I feel about Zane. You know my embarrassing secret,” he noted. My heart sank just a little bit. Every time he mentioned Zane’s name, it was like someone stomping all over my heart.
“I kind of figured that out before you ever told me,” I confessed.
Gage groaned, ruffling his fingers back through his gorgeous red hair. “Fuck. It’s that obvious, isn’t it?”
I nodded and gave him a sympathetic smile. “Yeah. At least, it’s noticeable to me. But I’ve been told I might be more observant than most people. It’s a habit. I get so used to paying close attention to my customers at the blackjack table that I tend to do it when I’m off the clock, too,” I explained it away quickly, not wanting to make him feel bad.
“How about you?” he went on, looking at me quizzically. “Does anyone know about your little crush? Or are you just way better at hiding it than I am? You’re a pretty quiet guy. I bet you play your cards pretty close to your chest.”
I knew I was blushing again, and I was annoyed at my own body for betraying me this way. I made a sort of noncommittal “meh” noise, and Gage laughed.
“What does that mean?�
� he asked, nudging me on the shoulder.
“I just mean that I don’t think anyone knows. I always feel like it’s really obvious how I feel, but apparently not. Maybe I’m better at keeping secrets than I thought, because no matter what I do, the guy I like never seems to catch on,” I said pointedly. As expected, Gage didn’t read into my statement at all.
“Well, have you ever tried to make a move?” Gage asked. “I mean, why not just go for it?”
I sighed and idly stirred my mixed drink with the super-thin straw. “If only it was that easy. It’s hard to put yourself out there, you know. It’s scary. I don’t want to get hurt or… ruin what I already have,” I explained cryptically.
Gage looked thoughtful for a moment, and I began to worry that maybe I had said too much, and he had somehow worked out what and who I was talking about. He leaned back against the cushy black leather seat, stretching out his arms so that one of them was loosely hooked behind me. Even though we still weren’t even actually touching, I felt a shiver run down my spine. It was infuriating. Just being this close to him was enough to set every one of my nerves on fire. I could feel his every breath, his every movement, as though we were fused together. I was hyper-aware of his body, so close and yet still not touching. I mused inwardly about how that seemed to be an appropriate analogy for our relationship: always so close and yet there was a massive, wide gulf between us, separating his soul from mine. I would have handed him my heart on a string if he’d asked for it, but his heart was always just out of reach, locked up in a fortress behind unbreakable glass.
I waited for him to say something else, hoping he couldn’t read my mind and know how much his presence weighed on me and thrilled me at the same time. Finally, he said, “Hmm. Maybe I should take a leaf out of your book, then.”
I frowned in confusion and took a sip of my drink. “What do you mean?” I asked.
“Well, you said you’ve been wary of making a move and messing up whatever relationship you already have with the guy you like. I’m kind of in the same boat with Zane. I mean, we have been friends for a long time. Close friends. And business partners. Hell, I see the man nearly every single day of my damn life. I can’t avoid him. And if things were to go south, I would risk losing everything. This job, our friend group, all the stability I have in my life that keeps me afloat. I wouldn’t want to lose all of that,” he reasoned.
“So, what are you going to do?” I pressed him, my heart pounding.
“I guess I need to make a decision. I’ve danced around the topic too much already, for far too long. I either need to bite the bullet and just confront Zane about my feelings or hold my damn peace and let go,” he admitted with an air of finality.
“Wow,” I murmured, actually surprised. “That sounds pretty big.”
“Who’s to say whether I can actually work up the courage to do that, though,” he chuckled. “I’ve been chasing after Zane since the day we first met. At this point, I don’t really know any other way to be, you know what I mean? I’ve been the guy who’s in love with Zane for so long, I don’t know who I would be without that.”
“Yeah,” I sighed, looking at the way the dim lights played across the angles of his handsome face, wishing he would turn and look back at me. And actually see me for what I am, for how valuable I could truly be for him. “I get that.”
Gage downed the rest of his Long Island Iced Tea in one long gulp, which was pretty impressive considering how strong the bartender made our drinks. He got a glassy, glazed look on his face and gave me a big grin. His cheeks were starting to go all ruddy and pink like they did when he was tipsy, and it only made him cuter to look at.
“Wow. That was fast,” I commented, still sipping my drink slowly.
He leaned in close, his beautiful hazel eyes locked on mine. I could feel my heart starting to race again already. He murmured softly, “You should finish that drink, Devin. I think I’m ready to go home.”
“Oh,” I said sadly.
Gage seemed to pick up on my somber tone and cupped the side of my face, which immediately sent a thrill down my back. “And you’re coming with me,” he added.
“Oh,” I said, in a very different tone. I quickly finished off my drink, and Gage grabbed me by the arm, pulling me up and leading me out of El Puente to the elevator. To my relief, he didn’t even glance back toward the bar to where Zane and Diego were sitting. For once, it seemed like I had successfully dragged Gage away from his obsession, and even though I knew it was probably mostly due to the buzz his drink gave him, it felt good. At least for tonight, Gage could be mine. I could pretend things were that easy, that all it took was a drink and a good conversation to distract him from Zane. I knew deep down it wasn’t that simple, but for now, I was more than willing to ride this out and see how far the night could take us.
As soon as the elevator doors closed, Gage pushed me against the wall and kissed me, his hands roving up and down my body as I moaned into his mouth. He cupped my chin in his fingers, holding my face still as he kissed me hard, his tongue pushing into my mouth while he rutted against me in the tiny room. I found myself wishing that the elevator would malfunction and get stuck so this would never end.
This was my heaven, cornered in a small space with Gage breathing hot boozy breaths against my neck, his hands on my body. When the elevator dinged and the doors opened to the ground floor, Gage tugged me out across the lobby, his hand holding mine tightly. He sloppily hailed a cab, and we piled into the back seat. Gage took just enough time to bark his address at the driver before rolling up the partition and pouncing on me again. He tangled his fingers in my hair, his teeth grazing my bottom lip as he kissed me hungrily, like he could hardly wait to get me home.
Over the course of the short drive to his place, he nearly ripped my shirt off a few times, his hand massaging my cock through the front of my pants. I rolled my hips, pushing up into his hand, feeling myself getting harder and harder. He was everything I wanted. There was no one in this world who could turn me on the way Gage could.
As soon as we got to his place, Gage tossed another hundred-dollar bill at the driver and pulled me out of the cab. The car drove off, and he fumbled with the keys to his front door. Laughing, I took them from him and fitted them into the lock. We spilled into the townhouse, wrapped in each other’s arms, kissing and groaning. I broke away just for a second to wrangle the key back out of the lock and close the door before turning back to Gage, who was already stripping out of his clothes. He kicked off his shoes, tossed his jeans and shirt across the room, and was now clad just in his boxers. I licked my lips at the sight of his huge cock straining at the front of his underwear. Suddenly, I couldn’t wait any longer. I knew exactly what I wanted.
I stripped off my shirt, keeping my pants on even as I unzipped them and slid my hand down the front to stroke my cock. Gage watched me touching myself, his jaw slack and his eyes glassy with desire. “Come here,” he growled, curling his finger and beckoning me forward.
I walked over and pressed him into the wall, kissing his neck and grazing his soft skin lightly with my teeth while he moaned with pleasure. His cock rubbed up against my groin, creating tantalizing friction. I reached down and tugged at his boxers. He got the message and took them off, tossing them across the room into the small pile. His cock sprang free, and I couldn’t resist. I kissed my way down his body to kneel down in front of him, then leaned in to lightly lick the head of his cock.
“Oh fuck,” he whispered, reaching down to hold my head in front of his crotch. I looked up at him to see his face full of bliss and anticipation, which was more than enough for me.
“Wait, wait,” he murmured, reaching for a jacket hanging off the coat rack beside us. He rummaged through one of the deep pockets and pulled out a condom, sliding it on over his shaft.
I took over, sliding my hand up and down his length while he closed his eyes and sighed. Stroking him lightly, I
pulled his cock into my mouth, sucking hard.
“Fuck me, that feels so good,” Gage groaned, rutting against my mouth.
I took him down to the hilt, fondling his balls while I bobbed up and down on his hard, glorious cock. I could taste the slightest hint of salty pre-cum in my mouth from when my tongue touched the head of his cock, and that drove me wild. I began to deepthroat him harder and faster, reveling in the way his massive shaft nearly gagged me each time. I swirled my tongue around the sensitive tip while I pumped his length with my hand. Before long, he was losing himself to the pleasure, fucking my face as his legs shook and he struggled to stay upright.
I stroked my own cock as I sucked him off, feeling myself get closer and closer to orgasm. And judging from the way Gage’s body was tensing up, I had a feeling he was getting pretty close, too. I was determined to make him explode, to milk out every precious drop of his seed. I sucked harder until my mouth was aching and I was seconds away from coming.
“Oh, my god,” he whimpered. “Holy shit. I’m going to fucking come, baby.”
I moaned, sending vibrations up through his body. He rolled his hips, fucking my mouth. Just as I was about to explode in my jeans, he began to mutter something else.
“Zane,” he whispered gruffly. Instantly, my heart sank, and I felt tears spring to my eyes. “Zane,” he murmured again, his eyes shut tightly and his cock twitching in my mouth. He was about to come any second now, and even though it broke my heart to hear him say another man’s name, I wasn’t about to give up now. I wanted to make him feel amazing, even if it meant putting my feelings aside for now. I picked up the pace, working his cock with my hand and my mouth in tandem until he braced himself against the wall and shuddered with a groan of pleasure.
“Fuck!” he gasped, and the condom filled with his hot come. I didn’t stop blowing him until he was utterly spent, trembling and panting against the wall. When I was finished, he pulled me up to kiss me again, his hand trailing down between my legs. But I was done.
