“Easy…”
“I am not, but I can be tricked,” Josh said saucily.
I ignored his attempts to laugh off his emotion. “You’re thinking that you want me to take you back to our hotel room, lay you down on that big bed, and make love to you until the sun comes up.”
“Something like that,” he admitted with a sappy look on his face.
So, that was exactly what I did.
THE NEXT TWO DAYS with Gabe in Miami were picture perfect; I’m talking worthy of a chick flick. We repeated our love for one another several times a day, we splashed around in the water, ate every kind of delicious food imaginable, walked hand-in-hand on the beach each night, and then returned to our room to make crazy, passionate love. We were a movie night away from the biggest cliché there ever was about dating. In fact, I found a mug online with the famous cliché on it and ordered it so Gabe could add it to his mug collection. I was happy to see that it would arrive at my house while we were on vacation so I could surprise him when we returned.
In the meantime, I had a Valentine’s Day gift squirreled away in my suitcase for him. Neither of us talked about making V-Day plans and I figured Gabe might be like a lot of men who gave the day absolutely no consideration as being important. I used to be one of them because I never had anyone to celebrate the day with. I decided to keep it low key and tried not to make a big fuss. I bought Gabe a small box of his chocolate covered caramel and pecan candies and a mug that read: BAD COP. I also brought some massage lotion because I remembered just how much he loved my hands all over him.
Gabe had the same idea for Valentine’s Day. He gave me a box of dark chocolate covered cherries and the cutest fucking t-shirt that read: I GIVE BLOWJOBS. A blow dryer, a pair of shears, and a comb were beneath the words. Gabe had also brought some massage lotions with him, but the ones he bought were flavored. I had a lot of fun licking that cinnamon-flavored oil off his dick, while Gabe preferred the strawberries and cream on my body. He worked me up for so long that I gave him plenty of cream to go with his strawberries.
Later, I laid my head on his chest and said, “Thank you for making my first Valentine’s Day amazing.” You see, prior to meeting and falling in love with Gabe, I never would’ve told anyone just how lonely that day was for me every single year. I worried that I sounded too pathetic and I was always afraid someone would reaffirm that love wasn’t in the cards for me. Gabe gave me the courage to be myself and to say what was on my mind without fear of rejection. That was his greatest gift to me and one I planned to cherish for the rest of my life.
Gabe was silent for a long time so I raised my head to look at him. His brow was furrowed and he looked angry. Gabe turned his face to look at me and his expression softened immediately. “Fucking idiots was what they were. It’s hard for me to be mad at them when their stupidity made you available when I came into your life.” I realized that his anger the moments before wasn’t directed at me but at the people in my past who had hurt me.
I enjoyed the time we spent with his folks too. They were a lot of fun to be around and I saw why Gabe turned out to be the amazing man that he had. The funniest moment of the trip had to be when Al recommended we play some poker one night after dinner. Gabe’s eyes about bugged out of his head in fear that I’d lose every dime I had. Ha! He silently shook his head no, but I readily accepted the offer.
I was the one who had the last laugh when I ended up with all the chips that night. I smiled at each of their shocked faces, especially Gabe’s because it was obvious he was seeing me in a new light.
“Looks to me you’re dating a card shark,” Al said to his son. I saw the gleam of approval in his dark eyes as he smiled broadly at me. “Well done, son.”
“Dad,” Gabe said in a warning tone. “You’re not taking him to poker night at the American Legion.”
“Why not?” Al and I both asked.
“It’s just not a good idea,” Gabe said. It turned out that poker night was the same night I planned to introduce Gabe to my parents. I promised Al that he and I would whip some ass the next time I came for a visit.
Away from our everyday lives, Gabe and I had time to get to know one another more, delve deeper into our pasts, and share things that we’d never told anyone else. I asked things like, “Did you ever get caught masturbating by your parents?”
“Not so much in the act,” Gabe said, “more like they noticed that my hot showers were getting longer. You?”
“Same, except it wasn’t the length of the shower that tipped my mom off,” I told Gabe.
“What was it?”
“Once I discovered the cool thing my dick did and how good it felt, I wanted to do it all the time. I quickly learned the side effects of too much jerking off and it wasn’t blindness.” Gabe threw his head back and laughed heartily, a sound I had become addicted to. “I started using my mother’s expensive moisturizer to prevent chafing and forgot to put it back one day. I found a bottle of lube in the shower the very next day.”
“Your mom sounds kind of cool and understanding,” Gabe said.
It was my turn to laugh. “She is cool and understanding, but she takes things to the extreme. Remind me to tell you about my ‘coming out’ after you meet her.”
“Why can’t you tell me now?” Gabe asked.
“It will mean more to you after you meet her. Just trust me, babe.”
He did and on that fateful Wednesday evening, Gabe got to see exactly what I was referring to when I said my mom took things to the extreme. Now, lesser men might’ve been embarrassed about their mother’s level of excitement for their happiness, but I had come to terms with Bertie’s personality quirks long ago.
“Oh, wow,” Gabe said in awe as he looked around the living room of my parents’ condo. “I’ve never seen anything like it.” I knew he was understating the obvious because the look on his face was priceless as he took in the “Welcome, Gabe” sign in rainbow colors, the helium filled balloons around the room, and the big poster of the two of us on the wall that said Josh loves Gabe beneath it, like that Happy Days spinoff with Joanie and Chachi. I sure hoped that Gabe and I had a happier, longer run than the ill-fated sitcom.
I didn’t ask why she wanted a picture of us as a couple, because I knew what she was going to do; I grew up in her house for fuck’s sake. Gabe wasn’t the only one springing parental surprises that week. I was happy my mom toned down her party outfit though. I worried she’d wear enough rainbows in her outfit to look like a circus clown, or worse, Mimi from The Drew Carey Show. I might not have known the name of the football team from Cleveland, but I knew the famous comedian-turned-actor-turned game show host. My mom was wearing a sunny yellow dress with a rainbow belt. She reminded me of a Care Bear that Meredith used to have.
“Come give mama a hug, Joshy,” she said when she saw me.
I narrowed my eyes at Gabe when he mouthed “Joshy” with a ridiculous grin on his face. I gave my mom a long hug and could feel the happiness she felt for me vibrating through her tiny frame. I had finally brought home someone for her to meet, someone that I loved, and another person for her to love too. As whacky as my mother often was, she never embarrassed me. Everything she did was out of pure love for me, her only child. She was my greatest champion, a fierce warrior who was just over five feet tall, and I adored her.
“I’m so happy for you, Josh,” she whispered. “I’ve hoped and prayed for this day for so long.” She pulled back and looked up into my eyes. “Introduce me to your guy.”
“Mom, this is G…”
“Oh, I know who this is.” My mother elbowed past me and hugged Gabe so tight I worried she was suffocating him. “It’s so good to meet you,” she said, not turning loose of her prey.
“The pleasure is all mine,” Gabe told her, patting her back.
“Bertie, turn loose of the young man. You’ll cut off the circulation to his lower limbs,” my father said when he walked into the room.
My parents were the exact opposite on
every spectrum. I’m talking personality, wardrobe, hobbies, and even food. How they managed to compromise and meet in the middle like they did was beyond me. My father once said that my mother made him a better man because she made him appreciate things he never noticed before, like art, music, and even bright colors. “She lights up a room and doesn’t even know it,” he once told me. “Well, she lights me up too. She fills me with a warmth and radiance like my own little ray of sunshine. If you want to be happy in life you either need to be someone’s ray of sunshine or the sky that allows them to shine bright.” I don’t think I fully realized what my father meant until I met Gabe.
Gabe and I were opposite in many ways too and I hoped the example my parents set for me would help me to accommodate Gabe’s needs and personality rather than stifle it. Factoring what I had learned about his need to please from his mother, I knew I’d have to work harder to be his ray of sunshine and not a soul-sucking tornado that would take everything he wanted to give and leave emptiness behind. Later that night, I brought it up when we returned to our beach–as I’d come to think of it.
At first, Gabe laughed at my analogy, but then he stopped when he realized I was serious. “I would never describe you as a soul-sucking tornado, Josh. You’re definitely a ray of sunshine and sometimes I need to wear sunglasses because you burn so bright.”
I stopped and looked at him. “I don’t think I can properly express just how much it means to me that you don’t ever try to change me–not the way I talk, dress, or sashay my happy ass down the street. You’re not only a blue sky, Gabe, you’re one that’s so vivid and striking that there are no clouds marring its perfection. Those days are so rare, but then again, I think you are too.” I think it was a tossup as to who was more surprised by my words.
“I can think of a way you can attempt to express your feelings for me if words have failed you, Sunshine.”
From that moment on, Gabe swapped out his nickname for me and started calling me Sunshine instead of babe. Gabe got a kick out of spending time with my parents too and I don’t think I ever saw him laugh so hard when I told him about my “coming out” party. I told him it made his “welcome party” look tame in comparison. It was both a humiliating and heartwarming experience, one that I’d never forget for the rest of my life.
On our last night in Florida, we had dinner with both sets of parents. We were practically ignored as our folks got to know one another and talked about us like we weren’t in the same room. We just sat there and watched it all unfold as we enjoyed a lovely dinner while Al and my father discussed who should pay for it. Gabe snatched up the bill while those two argued good naturedly, then we quietly snuck away so we could enjoy our last night of vacation before we had to return home.
It was obvious he needed my warmth and radiance even more when we returned to Ohio to temperatures that barely broke the freezing mark after an amazing week in the sun. Neither of us had been eager to return, but we couldn’t stay gone forever. I had a business to run and Gabe needed to look like he wasn’t guilty of whatever crimes IA thought he committed.
We had so much to do that Sunday when we returned home. The first thing we did on our way home from the airport was stop by the grocery store to get emergency staples. I had planned to do the real shopping the following day, but there wasn’t going to be a damn thing in that house to eat, and I was staying home once I got there. I picked up ingredients for a tossed salad and homemade pizza. Gabe added cupcakes from the bakery.
Gabe helped me carry the luggage and groceries upstairs then left to pick up Buddy from Adrian and Sally Ann’s house. I spent a good amount of time fussing over my own feather and fur babies who were happy to see me even though I knew that Meredith and Chaz took good care of them in my absence. I let Jazzy out of her cage to run and play while Diva weaved in and out of my legs.
Savage squawked happily, “Fucknugget! Fucknugget!” I had worried that Savage would revert back to his destructive habits while I was gone, but Meredith assured me that she would keep a close eye on him and even stay over if he looked to be freaking out over being left alone at night. The way he bopped his head and moved from side to side told me that he had done just fine.
As much as I enjoyed our trip, it was good to be home among my familiar things and my babies. I looked forward to spending some quiet time in my salon the following day and getting back into my normal routine, but until then, I had a lot of laundry and things to do. I knew that Gabe would do his part and help, but it didn’t take more than one person to load the washing machine.
I sorted the dirty laundry into piles on the washroom floor and returned the luggage to the walk-in closet in my bedroom. When I exited the closet, I realized that there was something on my perfectly made bed that didn’t belong. A bouquet of decaying red roses and an envelope was placed in the center of my pillows. I knew in my heart that the gift wasn’t left there by one of my friends to welcome me home. My first thought was to remove the offending items from my bed, but I knew I wasn’t allowed to touch it. I just stood there staring.
In fact, I was in the same spot when Gabe and Buddy returned. “Sunshine,” Gabe called out.
“In here.”
Buddy bounded in and made a beeline right for me. It was the jolt back to reality that I needed and not even the ominous gift could stop me from dropping to my knees to give Buddy the hug and ear scratching he needed.
“What the fuck is that?” Gabe asked when he walked into the room. He went over to the bed and leaned over to get a closer look without touching the evidence left behind. “Goddamn it.” He pulled his cellphone out of his pocket and called the police station.
Next thing I knew, my home was filled with officers–twice the amount that showed up for the tire slashing. I’m telling you I saw people I didn’t even know lived in our town or worked on the force. My house was dusted for fingerprints, photos were taken, the offending items were handled with latex gloves, and Gabe had Meredith and Chaz come over to speak with the police so they could try and figure out when the items were left behind. I wasn’t included in any of it; Gabe sat me on the couch and I was left there until the last person left my home.
The quiet night at home I had planned with Gabe was shot to hell. I watched as his body got tighter and his face grew more tense as the minutes ticked away. Gabe had read whatever was in the envelope and I could feel him trying to build a wall between us. I wasn’t about to let that happen.
Gabe stood with his back to me for a long time as he ran his hand through his hair. I figured he was searching for the right words to say, but that gave me time to prepare some of my own. Gabe dropped his hand then turned to face me. The devastated look in his eyes shredded me. Whatever he was thinking was hurting him so bad and I was certain I didn’t want to hear his thoughts spoken out loud.
“No, Gabe.” I shook my head. “You don’t get to make me fall in love with you then crush my heart. You’re not allowed to say things like your world revolves around me then walk away. You don’t get to call me your Sunshine then end us.”
“It would only be until this guy is caught,” Gabe said.
“No,” I said in my most resolute voice.
“You don’t even know what was inside the envelope,” Gabe told me.
“I don’t care.” Well, I did care, but I knew that we were stronger together than apart. “This sick fuck just wants to drive a wedge between us and you’re letting them win.”
“It said: ‘If you cared about him then you would’ve heeded the warning. He will die for your mistake.’ I’m already responsible for…”
“Do not say that you’re responsible for Nate Turner’s death. I’m still not convinced this has anything to do with Nate’s death,” I told Gabe.
“I might’ve agreed if the bastard didn’t include a picture of a dead Nate Turner that was taken at the scene of his homicide. Whoever this person is means business and for whatever reason they’re targeting me. I will not–cannot–let you get hurt because of me.
Josh, I would rather break your heart temporarily than see any harm come to you.”
“Bullshit!” I knew my heart didn’t work that way and I wasn’t so sure that I’d forgive him once the threat to me was gone. “Listen very carefully to what I have to say, Gabe, because I’m not playing around here. I’ve been bullied my whole life and this right here is just a scarier, more intense form of bullying. I. Will. Not. Have. It.”
“Sunshine…”
“No! You don’t get to tell me you’re going to break my heart and in the very next breath use the cutesy name you have for me. We’re going to be a team and work through this like the example our parents set for us.” I rose to my feet and went to him. “Gabe, I love you. Please don’t give up on us.”
Gabe closed his eyes and I had hope that maybe he was coming around. When he reopened them, I didn’t see the conviction I had hoped my words would stir inside him, but neither did I see desperation for me to understand him. I held my breath while I waited to hear what he had to say and he waited so long that I became dizzy.
“Things will need to change around here,” he said firmly.
“Okay,” I readily agreed, but then thought about it. “What kind of things?”
“You’re getting an alarm installed on all of the doors and windows. You will no longer allow the back door to remain unlocked during business hours. It stays shut and locked at all times. You have plenty of neighbors to the front of your house and business, but none in the back since no one has moved into Bianca’s house. You will have a door and a lock installed at the bottom of the stairs so that you can keep people from wandering upstairs while you’re busy in the salon.” Gabe had held up a finger with every demand that he made. “Those flowers weren’t there a few days ago when Meredith enticed a pouting Diva from beneath your bed with a treat. I think the flowers were already dead and were brought up during salon hours yesterday since Saturday is your busiest day. Someone probably came through the back door and headed right up the steps to your home.”
Something to Dye For (Curl Up and Dye Mysteries, #2) Page 15
