The buzzer sounded and all the cell doors clicked open for breakfast. “Damn,” was all Violet could say. She kicked her covers off and sat up. “I give up. Not being able to sleep must be part of my punishment.
Barbara climbed down from her bunk. “Morning, mamacita, you look like shit.” She pulled her long ebony hair into a bun, and flashed Violet a bright smile.
Violet decided it would be better for both of them if she ignored that comment. She got up, stretched, and left the cell. Violet didn’t wash her face or brush her teeth. She left her hair matted and nappy—she found that the worse she looked the better off she was.
Walking over to the day room, she nodded her head at a couple of people who spoke to her but that was as far as it went. She wasn’t interested in trying to make any friends, plus Barbara had given her the low-down on their cozy little block. Half of the inmates and most of the guards were dikes and Violet could never swing that way.
Violet could only stand being in the dayroom in the early morning because everyone else was eating or still asleep. She took a seat close to the TV but didn’t really watch it. I wonder if Tab was able to get in touch with Begonia. She had added Tabitha’s number to her phone list but didn’t have the heart to call her again. She was scared of what Tab might say. She looked over her shoulder at the phone sitting on the corner table and rolled her eyes. If Begonia knows you are in here, then she’ll come and see about you. Harassing Tabitha and her family ain’t gonna get you nowhere for real.
Officer Davis came into the day room and walked in front of the TV. “How come I never see you eating breakfast?”
Violet crossed her arms. “I don’t like breakfast.”
“Well, that can’t be good for the baby.”
“I truly don’t care about what’s good for the baby, Mike.”
“Aw, man, don’t talk like that. That’s not cool.”
Violet cocked her head to the side. “Why shouldn’t I talk like that, Mike? You came in here, got in my way, and stuck your nose in my business.”
“Look, calm down, I was only saying…”
“I know what the fuck you were saying.” Violet leaned forward in her chair. “It’s the same God damned thing everyone’s been saying since I got here, but guess what. I don’t want this baby. I didn’t ask for this baby. I don’t give a shit about this baby and neither do the three motherfuckers who raped me. If you are so concerned about it, I’ll give it to you as soon as I pop it out.”
She stood up so fast that her chair flipped over. A female officer that Violet wasn’t familiar with rushed to Mike’s side. He put his hand up to stop her from taking further action, but Violet just gave her a blank stare.
Mike cleared his throat. He walked over towards Violet and picked up her chair. “You know, if you don’t want to have the baby, you don’t have to.”
Violet opened her mouth to say something and then closed it again. The thought of not having the baby had never really crossed her mind. She walked back to her cell in a daze. I could get rid of it. I wouldn’t have to feel their hands on me or taste their sweat every time the baby moved. She sat down on her bunk, brought her knees up to her chest and wrapped her arms around them and cried. This could really be over.
Barbara ran into the cell pulled her pants and panties down, and flopped down onto the toilet. “Girl, I swear this baby is sitting his little ass directly on my bladder. I’ve got to pee every ten minutes. I can barely eat.” She rubbed her belly and sighed. “I can’t wait to drop this load. I ain’t seen my chocha in months. I know it looks like a hairy gorilla punta.” She laughed and looked at Violet. “What’s the matter with you, mamacita, you in pain, or something?”
Violet wiped her eyes on her sleeve. “What do I have to do to get rid of this baby?”
“What do you mean, get rid of it?”
Violet just looked at her
Barbara cocked her head to the side waiting for an explanation. Her eyes bugged out of her face when she finally caught on. “Aww, Sweetie, why you wanna do that?”
“Do you know how would I go about it?”
Barbara got up and washed her hands. She leaned against the sink. “If this is really what you want to do, sweetie, then you should try to go and see one of the nurses. I’m sure they know how to make that happen.” Barbara’s thick black eyebrows knitted together and she looked at Violet with pity and sadness in her eyes.
“Why are you looking at me like that?” Violet asked as she unfolded her legs and stood up. “Not everyone got knocked up on a bed of roses by a man they loved. You don’t know what happened to me. You don’t have one fucking clue.” Violet walked out of the cell before her temper got the best of her. She couldn’t handle pity, especially from a psycho bitch that was just as knife happy as her sister.
Violet walked back to the day room. She saw Mike standing next to the water fountain talking to Brandi. Taking a deep breath, she walked over to them both. “Excuse me,” her voice broke and she cleared her throat. “I want to talk to someone, a nurse or somebody.”
“What’s the matter?” Brandi asked. Her voice was laced with honest concern.
Violet took another deep breath, as fear wiggled up her spine. Her hands started to tremble so she balled them into fist and stuck them in her pants pockets. “I need to talk to someone about getting an abortion.”
They took her to the nurse, and everything was set up within the week.
Violet did her intake over the phone and received one counseling session by the prison’s shrink. The day of the procedure Violet was numb. They shackled her in her cell and escorted her outside to the bus. She was relieved to see Brandi and Mike standing by the gate. “Both of you are going with me?”
Brandi smiled and Mike nodded his head yes. Violet boarded the bus put her head back and closed her eyes. “How long is it going to take us to get there?”
“About an hour or so,” Mike said, sitting in a seat behind Violet. “Traffic is a mess in the morning, so it’s gonna take a little longer than usual.”
“You okay?” Brandi asked as she sat down beside Violet.
Violet shook her head, no. I don’t think I’m ever going to be okay again, she thought as she looked out the window. The baby fluttered in her stomach, and Violet held her breath willing the movement to stop. She could see Kyle’s face, his eyes, and his smile. She remembered the way he smoothed her hair behind her ears, and told her that she was beautiful. She blinked back her tears and shook her head to clear her thoughts of Kyle. She turned to Brandi and forced a smile. “Do y’all do this a lot?”
“Do what?”
“You know, take people out of jail to get abortions.”
“I wouldn’t say it happens a lot, but it does happen.”
“How long does it take?”
“It really depends on the clinic. Sometimes it takes a couple of hours, and sometimes we can be there all damn day.”
Violet didn’t care how long it took as long as it got done.
An hour later they pulled up in front of the clinic. Protesters carrying picket signs of tiny caskets lined the pavement. They were shouting and carrying on.
“Murderers! Baby Killers! Choose life, your mother did!”
Brandi walked to the front of the bus while Mike helped Violet up. “Are you ready for this?” he asked quietly.
“I’m about as ready as I’m going to be,” Violet said as she walked to the front of the bus and stood behind Brandi.
Twelve men in red jackets walked out of the clinic. They formed two lines and locked arms clearing a path to the door. Violet was rushed into the building and taken up by a service elevator that led right to the back of the clinic. A short black nurse in white scrubs greeted them and led them to a small exam room.
“I’m going to need you to change into this hospital gown and sit on this table. I’ll be back when you are done so that I can take your vital signs.”
Mike stood guard at the door while Brandi un-cuffed Violet and helped her change.
&nb
sp; “You’re not going to freak out on me again are you?” Brandi asked as she held up the hospital gown. “’Cause I may have to knock your little ass out this time.”
“I’m cool.” Violet slipped on the gown and hopped up on the table. “You’re not going to have to knock me out. I promise.
“Okay,” Brandi said with a small smile. She walked over to the door and Violet panicked.
“Are you leaving? Where are you going?”
“Calm down, honey. I’m going to be right outside the door.”
“Okay,” Violet said feeling a little silly. She stared at her hands until Brandi closed the door.
The room smelled like alcohol and disinfectant. The combination made Violet a little nauseous. The nurse came back in with a chart and some medical equipment. She asked violet a couple of questions, poked and prodded her a bit and then left. Violet fought the urge to cry. She lay back on the table and waited for the doctor.
When he finally came in, Violet was covered in goose bumps. Her heart thumped against her ribs, and her blood rushed in her ears. She couldn’t make out a word he was saying.
The nurse instructed Violet to put her feet in the stirrups and scoot her butt down to the edge of the table. Violet’s eyes followed the doctor as he washed his hands and took a seat between her legs. Violet stopped looking at him after he slipped on his gloves. Her skin began to crawl as soon as he placed his hands on her stomach. She focused on the ceiling tiles, counting all of the tiny holes in each tile to take her mind off of what he was doing. Tears slid down the side of her face into her ears. The nurse offered Violet her hand and she grabbed it and clung to it as if her life depended it on it.
“Shhhhhh,” The nurse gently hushed Violet and wiped away her tears. “It’s all going to be over soon.”
Violet let those words sink inside of her. It’s all going to be over soon, she thought over and over again. It’s all going to be over soon. Violet heard the machine switch on and woosh like a vacuum cleaner. She felt a tugging sensation for a few minutes and then nothing.
It was done.
The baby was gone, but Violet didn’t feel any relief at all. She felt empty, hollow, and dirtier than she’d ever felt in her life. The nurse helped her sit up and put on a pair of underwear with a pad inserted inside. She led Violet into a large recovery room with six beds divided by multi colored curtains.
“Here, take this.” She handed Violet two horse pills and a small cup of water. “You’re going to begin cramping heavily and these pills will help with the pain.”
Violet downed the pills and lay down on the hospital bed. The nurse put a heating pad on Violet’s stomach, pulled the curtain, and walked away.
I just want to die, Violet thought, before she drifted off to sleep.
Chapter 10
Portia drove around for two hours looking for Begonia.
“This sucks, Portia. Let’s go back to the crib. I want to watch cartoons.”
“Shut the fuck up, Babygirl. Ain’t nobody going home until we find Begonia.” Portia eyed Babygirl’s outfit. She wore a pink spandex mini dress with matching pink pumps. “Why the hell are you still wearing that?”
Babygirl rolled her eyes and slumped down in the passenger seat. “It ain’t like I had a whole lot of time to change, shit. I don’t even know why we wasting so much time looking for this broad.”
“Because she’s like a sister to me.”
Honey lit a cigarette in the back seat. “Babygirl, you know how Portia gets over family.”
“Yeah, I know.” Babygirl rolled her hazel eyes. “We’re supposed to be like the musketeers and shit.”
Portia smiled. “That’s right. One for all, and all for one!”
Honey flicked her ash out the window and then tapped on Portia’s shoulder. “Hey, Portia, I think that’s Bee right there.”
Portia pulled the car over and looked out the window. “Yeah, that’s her.”
“What are you going to tell her?” Honey asked.
“I’ll make up something.”
Babygirl sucked her teeth. “Why are you bitches making up stories anyway? Let’s just make her get in the car.”
“Bitch, you must be four different kinds of crazy if you think we can make Begonia do anything.”
Portia got out of the car and leaned against it. “Where the hell did you get those fancy shoes, bitch?”
Begonia could tell Portia’s voice from anywhere but she didn’t feel up to dealing with her right now. Just stop, Bee. You know that she ain’t gonna leave you alone if you ignore her. Begonia stopped walking. She pasted a smile on her face and turned around to talk to her friend. “I got them from your closet two weeks ago.”
Portia took a good look at the shoes again and shook her head. “I’ll be damned if those aint my shoes.”
Babygirl started laughing. “Yo, she’s a cold ass thief, man, I swear.”
“Shut up, Babygirl.” Honey flicked her butt onto the street and got out of the car to stand next to Portia.
Begonia walked over to Portia’s car. “What’s up, Honey. What the hell do you want, Portia?”
Portia smiled. “What, no, hug?”
“Get the fuck outta here with all that. T-Bird told me you were riding around looking for me. You found me, so what’s up?”
“I need your help on a job.”
“What kind of job?” Begonia asked although she already knew. Her stomach clinched at the thought of tricking. She hated that shit with a passion, but she was running out of options.
Babygirl burst out laughing. “What the fuck she means what kind of job? What kind of work does this bitch think we do?”
Begonia frowned and bent over to see who was talking shit inside the car. Portia side stepped to block Begonia’s view, and Honey turned around and stuck her head in the car.
“Say one more motherfucking thing and I’m gonna beat the bullshit out of you, and I mean it.”
Portia lit her cigarette. “A couple of execs from California are in town for a business meeting and they want to have an orgy with a few hood rats.”
Begonia’s stomach flipped. “You buggin’, Portia. I ain’t doing no damn orgy.” Begonia turned around and started to walk back across the street.
“Okay, so you don’t need this money, cool.”
Begonia paused. “How much?”
“Ten grand.”
Begonia wanted to walk away but she couldn’t. She needed that 10k more than she needed air. She turned to face Portia. “One night.”
Portia nodded. “One night.”
Begonia walked around the car and got in the back.
Honey looked at Portia and shook her head before sliding into the back seat next to Begonia.
Begonia walked into Portia’s house and sat down in the living room. So now I’m gonna turn into a hardcore ho, she thought as she put her feet up on the coffee table. You are really following in Doreen’s footsteps, Bee. Honey knocked Begonia’s feet off the table and sat down next to her. Babygirl flopped down on the steps and Portia stood by the door.
“Well, what’s up?” Begonia asked. “Can a bitch get a drink?”
Honey crossed her legs. “As soon as a bitch turns twenty one.”
Begonia rolled her eyes. “Whatever, I’m old enough to turn tricks but not old enough to drink? Get the fuck out of here.”
Babygirl started laughing and Honey shot her an evil look.
“Hey, Peanut.” Portia hollered into the kitchen. “Bring Begonia a fifth of vodka, please.
Peanut came out of the kitchen with a small bottle and Tabitha, Shanice, and Lisa.
“What the hell?” Begonia sat up in her chair. “Aw, naw, don’t tell me you guys are tricking too?” She looked at Portia. “What the fuck? Do you actually work for the devil or something?”
Portia nodded her head yes. “The fucking dental plan is amazing.”
Shanice sat on the edge of the coffee table and faced Begonia. “We came here to talk to you.”
; “About what?”
Lisa motioned for Babygirl to move over on the steps and she sat down beside her. “We know that you and Violet are in trouble, Bee.”
Begonia looked around at all of them like they were crazy. “And how do you guys know that?”
“Come on now, Bee,” Portia said softly. “You have a 200 thousand dollar price tag on your head. The streets are whispering your name, sweetie pie. That’s how I know. I also know that you’ve been playing stickup kid to the small sets all around Philly.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
Shanice shoulders slumped. “Come on, Bee. Everybody in this room knows that you’re the chick hitting up the corners.”
“I ain’t hitting up shit, and I don’t have time for this.” Begonia stood up. “I came over here to suck some dick for some quick cash. If that’s not happening, then I gotta bounce, ’cause I don’t have time for this bullshit here.”
“Sit down, Bee.” Lisa said from the steps.
“Fuck you, Lisa” Begonia headed for the door but Shanice stood up and got in her way.
“Move, Shanice.”
“No.” Tears sprang to Shanice’s eyes.
“I’m not going to ask you again.”
“What are you gonna do, Begonia, huh? You gonna fuck me up?” Fat tears fell down Shanice’s face. “Fuck me up then, but I ain’t moving out of your way.”
Begonia tried to shove Shanice out of her way, but Honey jumped up and grabbed her arms. “Get the fuck off of me,” Begonia screamed. She shimmied out of Honey’s grasp, and swung on her. Honey ducked and Lisa leaped over the coffee table and tackled Begonia. They booth fell on the couch.
“Get the fuck off of me,” Begonia screamed.
Portia climbed over Lisa and grabbed Begonia’s hair. “You are going to die, Begonia. You hear me? They are going to kill Violet, and Daisy, and then you. You need help so stop acting so fucking retarded and let us help you. You cannot do this by yourself.”
Begonia stopped struggling and collapsed against the sofa.
Lisa let her go and slid down on the floor beside her. She wiped her eyes on her sleeve and patted Begonia’s leg. “We’re going to get through this together.”
Violet: Strawberry Mansion 3 Page 7
