by Rye Brewer
No. That wasn’t quite true. A bright, hot fire of rage flamed up in my head and quickly consumed my thoughts. It wasn’t entirely my fault Cari was a vampire.
It was their fault, too. The Europeans. The shifters. They’d done it to her. I hadn’t forced them to torture her and brutalize her fragile, beautiful body. That was all their evil doing.
I couldn’t let them get away with it. No matter what, someone would pay this night.
23
Gage
It took less than no time to get to the warehouse—I’d given up on the whole running thing and gone straight to coursing when it became clear there wasn’t a moment to lose. Going in alone might be foolish, but it would hardly be the first foolish decision I’d made in the last two days.
Besides, this time I wasn’t going in to save anybody. They wouldn’t trap me the way they had before. Nothing could match me when my fury was heightened. I had to make them pay, and pay dearly.
They would know how she’d suffered before I was through with them.
I slipped into the building through the same door I’d used before, fangs at the ready. The lights were on, blazing bright, just as they had been. What disgusting experiments were they conducting this time? Whose life were they destroying for the sake of their sick pleasure?
The silence nearly deafened me. There wasn’t so much as the sound of breathing when I held my breath. Were they waiting for me? No, they couldn’t be. Even I knew how insane it was for me to be here, to return to the scene of where I’d escaped with Carissa. They wouldn’t expect me to come within five miles of the place.
So, where were they?
I found out soon enough.
The door to the room Cari had been held in, and almost died in, was open—no, not open. Broken. It hung from one of its hinges.
A feeling of dread filled me, but my feet wouldn’t stop moving. They carried me down the hall, step by step. The thick, coppery smell of blood was overwhelming. In any other circumstance, it would’ve piqued my appetite. But I knew whose blood I was smelling, and there was no chance of my feeding from them.
Besides, it was too late for anything like that.
“For the love of—” I whispered when I stepped into what I could only think of as the torture room. I hadn’t called upon the name of God since I was human, back when I believed in such a presence.
I shook my head in disbelief as I took in the scene.
Bodies. Everywhere. Draped over the table, over the cage which still sat beneath the skylight. Stacked inside the cage. Sprawled out grotesquely, their eyes wide and unseeing. Gaping wounds in their heads, their throats, the blood having spattered every surface imaginable before puddling on the floor.
I recognized the leader, who had the position of honor on the table. He was on his back, mouth open in a silent scream of unspeakable horror. I couldn’t have explained if I’d tried how I knew she’d saved him for last. It may have been the care she’d taken with him. The way she hadn’t torn out his throat carelessly, viciously, the way she’d done with the others. No, she’d sucked him dry. Two holes punctured his throat.
She must have torn off his genitals before she bled him. I turned away from the sight. No wonder he looked so horrified. My stomach turned at that and the thought she’d fed off him.
It was no less than they deserved, though the idea of feeding off monsters like them repulsed me. But it was better than feeding on animals—or, worse, innocent people.
I couldn’t leave the place as it was. There was too much evidence of her having been there—bloody fingerprints littered the room. A plan formed in my frantic mind, and I hurried, running from room to room, turning on all the oxygen lines, picking up a book of matches from one of the tables.
They had certainly set the place up with every conceivable necessity, though I couldn’t imagine why they’d needed to give their subjects oxygen. I didn’t have it in me to wonder.
I waited until I was outside before I dropped a lit book of matches in the weeds beside the warehouse, and when the explosion tore through the night, I was already miles away, coursing again.
It was more important than ever that I find her.
I just had no idea where to go.
24
Gage
There was only one place that made any sense.
Searching for her was a waste of energy. There were endless possibilities, weren’t there? Parks, clubs, alley after alley. It made my head spin.
I went back to her apartment, then, in the hopes she’d come back.
What if she did? I asked myself this question as I climbed the stairs, suddenly exhausted. Exhaustion wasn’t something that often overcame a vampire, unless they hadn’t fed in too long or coursed too far. That wasn’t my problem. My problem was the heaviness of my guilt.
There was an animal out there that looked suspiciously like Carissa—an animal of my making. And it might as well have been rabid for all the sense it would be exhibiting.
Even if she survived the first brutal, insane days, what then? She would have no one to show her the ropes, to explain the best way to live if she intended to stay alive.
I shuddered to think of her out there, on her own. Terrified. Unable to contain the bloodlust. Not knowing when, or if, it would ever settle and allow her to think clearly again. My poor, sweet Cari. I had brought her nothing but pain.
My dark thoughts disappeared the moment I stepped over the threshold into the little walkup, as someone—or something—took me by the throat and slammed me into the wall hard enough to knock the air from my lungs.
I struggled to pry the supernaturally strong fingers from just below my jaw and knew all too well who was strangling me.
“Cari!”
She could kill me, easily, and there would be nothing I could do to stop her. She was ten times stronger than me, maybe more. Her newly-turned strength hadn’t faded yet.
And she probably hated me.
When she realized it was me she was strangling, her fingers loosened enough for me to draw breath.
I took advantage of the opportunity to pry her loose then wrapped my arms around her and pinned hers to her sides.
“Relax, relax. I’m not the enemy here. I only want to help you, Cari. Please. Relax, so we can talk. I would never hurt you.”
What a lie. A filthy, stinking lie. I had already done far more damage than anyone should ever get away with. For a brief, bitter moment, I almost wished she would kill me. The only thing forcing me to preserve myself was the thought of her being alone in the world.
She stopped fighting but still breathed in big, gasping sobs which soon turned into mewling cries. Tears poured down her face, and her body shook with the force of the agony she suffered.
I turned her to me, wrapped my arms around her in a hug this time.
“I’m so sorry. I’m so, so sorry.” It was all I could whisper, again and again, rocking her back and forth as we slid to the floor. Her tears soaked through my shirt and kept flowing until she went nearly limp. And still, I whispered.
“I don’t know what to do,” she gasped.
“I know. I don’t, either. But we can try.”
“I-I can’t control it.”
“I know. I know. That’s why I wanted to find you.” I stroked her hair, smoothing it back from her forehead before taking her face in my hands and tilting it upward so I could see her.
She looked distraught, to say the least. And hungry. I could see it in her eyes, and I understood it. Nothing would satisfy her hunger in this stage. Not even all the blood she’d feasted on back at the warehouse.
“I went there, to the warehouse,” I murmured.
Pain touched her eyes.
“You don’t have to explain,” I continued, shaking my head. “I went there to do the same thing you did.”
“I couldn’t help it.”
“I know. I wouldn’t have been able to, either. And don’t worry—I destroyed the place for you. There’s no trace of you now.”
She closed her eyes, almost wincing. “I didn’t think about that. Thank you.”
“That’s why you need me. And why I don’t want to let you go. You’re not thinking clearly right now, don’t you see? You’ll get yourself in trouble.” I couldn’t say killed, but we both knew that was what I meant.
“I have to show you something.” She crawled across the floor and opened a door which sat beside the fireplace. A body tumbled out.
“Damn.”
She sat with her back to the wall, her head in her hands. “I couldn’t help it. I was hungry again. I couldn’t think of anything but blood.”
I tried to keep from staring at the young man who, until less than an hour ago, had been alive and probably on his way to or from a night on the town. He was dressed well, a decent-looking kid—except for the jagged tear in his throat, of course. He glared at me with his dead eyes, blaming me for his demise. Just one more death for me to carry on my conscience.
“I did this to you,” I whispered, my gaze going from his face to hers. She was as deeply tortured as anyone I’d ever seen, torn between her baser instincts and the little bit of humanity left in her. “This is all my fault.”
“You didn’t do anything but try to save me,” she whispered pitifully.
“If I had stayed away from you in the first place, though. If I hadn’t let him see us together. He wouldn’t have thought you were… mine.”
“But you didn’t know,” she replied, finally looking at me again as she rested her head against the wall. “You couldn’t have known.”
She glanced across the room, and I followed her gaze until I noted the tip of a tail swishing back and forth beneath the sofa. “Even the cat hates me now. Doesn’t know who I am. Used to jump on me the second I came through the door and wouldn’t leave me alone.”
“Because you’re not quite who you used to be. I’m sorry for that, too. All of it, Cari. I’ll never stop being sorry.”
I went to her then, helped her to her feet.
She still shook like a leaf, but she was much calmer than she’d been when I first got here. I took her face in my hands and forced myself to gaze into her confused eyes. “No matter what happens in all of this, I need you to know something. It’ll sound trite, hollow, especially in the face of everything that happened as a result.”
“What is it?”
“I did what I did because I love you. I’ve loved you since that first night. I couldn’t bear the thought of you dying in that damned warehouse. I didn’t want to live in a world without you. Probably the most selfish thing I could’ve done, and I know it now, but at the time…”
She touched my lips with the tips of her fingers. “You know why this isn’t entirely your fault? And not because of what those bastards did to me, either.”
“What are you talking about?”
She took a deep breath, and some of the confusion drained from her eyes. She appeared more like herself than she had since I turned her. “I went to the club to look for you. I wanted to see you again. I had no idea how we’d run into each other after that first night—I was so angry with myself for not getting your number. I thought you might go back there.”
“I did… to look for you, in case you did. I was watching.”
“Oh, Gage.” Tears filled her eyes again. “I would’ve done anything to be with you again. My feelings for you were that deep.”
Past tense. Were. “And now?” I asked, knowing it wasn’t strictly important but unable to hold back.
“Now…” She glanced away. “Now, I don’t know anything. Nothing’s clear anymore. All I can think about is blood. It’s like that single thought is drowning out everything else in my head.”
“I understand. The lust is still strong because you’re still so new. But it won’t always be like this. I promise.”
“Really?”
“It went away for me. It goes away for all of us. Your strength will wane, and you’ll normalize. When all goes away, things become normal again. As normal as they can, of course. You’ll be able to think clearly, the way you used to, and the hunger won’t be more than anything you’ve experienced after skipping a meal. Honestly.”
“I can hardly wait for that to happen,” she admitted. “I don’t know how much more of this I can take.”
“I know the feeling.” I closed my eyes when she rested the side of her face against my chest. She was with me, and she was thinking more clearly, and I could make sure no other innocent bystanders died in the near future.
I hoped.
I glanced out the window to find the sky lightening. It would be dawn soon. “We’ll have to get some rest for the time being. I’m sure you need it right now.”
She looked out the window and flinched. “Dawn.”
“Soon enough.” I held her at arm’s length. It was time for a little tough truth. “We have to leave. You know that, right?”
“What?” she glanced around, eyes wide and fearful.
“I know, the thought of leaving everything familiar is too much to consider right now, but it’s the only way. The league will find you otherwise. They have their ways, believe me. They’ll find you, and they’ll likely kill you. I’m sorry. They’ll kill me for breaking our laws, too. There’s no life for us here. We have to get as far away as we can.”
“Where?”
“I don’t know yet,” I had to admit. “But there must be a way. We’ll find it together.” I squeezed her arms. “Do you believe me?”
“I do,” she replied with a resolute nod.
“Good.”
The only problem was, I needed to believe myself. There had to be a way. I needed a little time to think—and the fact we couldn’t go out in sunlight provided the opportunity. I felt reasonably certain we had at least another day to spare before word possibly got out. I’d have to trust my siblings to keep news of Cari to themselves. I believed they would.
“Come on. You can’t sleep now—I guess you know that—but you can rest. And you’ll need it. Just close your eyes and let your body relax. It’ll refresh you.” I led her to the bedroom, making sure to pull the curtains tightly closed as she crawled into bed.
“Will you stay here with me?” She ran her hand over the other half of the bed.
“Of course.”
First, I bundled the corpse back into the closet before the cat got to it, telling myself I’d have to come up with a way to get rid of that, too. Once I was certain we were safe for the time being, I slid between the covers and took her in my arms.
Only I wouldn’t be resting. I’d be coming up with the closest thing to a plan I could devise.
“We’ll leave at sunset,” I whispered as her eyes slid shut.
25
Anissa
He was a fast walker, my father. He did everything quickly, the way a man who had a lot to do tended to. He was always busy, there was always somebody who wanted a piece of his time. Or a group of somebodies. He had to rush to get from one thing to the next. I wondered about that sort of life as I did my best to keep up with him on our way to his chambers—I was just shy of running full-out.
It wasn’t only his normal habit of moving fast that carried us on wings, either, and I knew it. He was going to see my mother. No ifs, ands, or buts.
He handled their reunion with all the same blunt, no-nonsense attitude with which he handled everything else. He’d get us to Hallowthorn Landing, and he’d see his long-lost love again because that was how it was going to be. If I’d raised any objections, he wouldn’t have listened anyway.
Not that I didn’t want to see her as much as he did. I had a stake in whether or not we reached her. But I had to wonder if we weren’t about to barge in where we weren’t welcome—and definitely not invited.
There was no telling how Mom would react when she saw him again. She had loved him, I had no doubt, but she had loved others since him. Sara’s father, Allonic’s father. Life had taken them in different directions.
Decades had
passed between my birth and the moment when Gregor ordered Felicity fetched from the Hermitage and brought before him to create the portal. That was a lot of water under the bridge.
But for him? It was obvious from the way his eyes lit up this was something he’d dreamed of ever since they’d parted ways. In his heart, no time had passed at all. He felt just as he had before. What would happen if all that hope was for nothing?
I didn’t have the heart to ask him. He was so happy—and working so hard to make it seem as though he had himself under control. He wrung his hands as he walked back and forth in front of the window which looked out over the bridges connecting the trees, watching for Felicity.
I thought of the way Mom had changed. How would he react to that? Would it crush him? Was he in love with a woman who didn’t exist anymore?
I opened my mouth to try to warn him, to smooth things over before we left, but it was too late. The door opened, and in stepped Felicity.
Immediately, I sensed a change in her. The lit torches which lined the walls of Gregor’s chambers illuminated her face, but the way her eyes glowed was something totally her own. She was radiant, full of optimism, even a little breathless. What could’ve changed so quickly? I had just seen her at the Hermitage, and she didn’t look like this.
Gregor cut off any questions I wanted to ask. “I need a portal. Immediately.”
The fact she didn’t bat an eye told me how normal it was for him to throw random demands her way.
“Where do you need to go? You know there are only a select number of locations I’m able to create a portal for.” She sounded as calm and serene as ever, like she had shaken off whatever excitement she’d just been through. I made a mental note to ask her more about it if we got a second alone together.
“Hallowthorn Landing,” Gregor announced.
“Ah. I trained there for a time. Remember? I can take you there.”
