She tried to make herself think as Mrs. O’Neal did. Albert and any men he hired were willing to kill a woman and a child so they could enrich themselves. It was the lowest of motives for murder although it was all too common. Any man with honor would feel it was right and just to kill to stop such men. None of the MacEnroys had looked as if they were suffering from what had been done.
She looked over at the O’Neal cottage and sighed. They had fought for that woman and her children, too. If the men had overpowered the MacEnroys they would have killed them all. She had no doubt about that. Emily told herself she should be pleased that she had found men who had the honor and the stomach to do what was right and just. She just wished she could have taken care of it all herself.
A small choked laugh escaped her. She had not been able to take of Albert and the men he hired even back in England. The family members who had stood with her were dead. The others simply thought her an hysterical female. It was the height of irony that Scots torn from their home by her kind were the ones who worked so hard to keep her and Neddy alive.
“Emily?”
She looked up and saw Iain move toward her, taking a seat by her side. He did not look as if he carried any weight for what he had done to keep her and Neddy safe. No ghosts appeared to haunt his expression. Emily wondered if there was something in the male mind and heart that made them able to accept deaths caused by their hands if those deaths could be justified.
“It has been a long, miserable day,” she said.
“That it has.” He put his arm around her shoulders and tugged her closer as he sipped his cider. “But we beat them. That is something to celebrate.”
“They tried to burn your house down.”
“Actually, we were not sure how the fire started at first. Duncan feared it might have been him because one of his shots went in the house. Could have knocked something over. But I saw the man in the tree shoot a fire arrow at it.”
“There was nothing that had a spark. Not in the dining room where the fire began.”
“I know. And we calculated that his shot would have gone in the kitchen. Window busted there. So that man got close enough and had the time to shoot in the fire. I will tell Duncan though as he was unsettled by the possibility.”
“It is ruined in there.”
“Nay, Matthew says the table just needs to be sanded down a bit and redone and it will be good as new. Carpet is a loss but Robbie says he can weave another. Shame though as ye had just scrubbed the whole place down.”
Emily gave a watery laugh. “I know and I am ashamed to admit I was so cross and cursing as I put out the fire. Muttering away about all the work I had done and it was a silly thing to fret over when you and your brothers were facing an army.”
“Nay. It is sometimes the small things that can really get to a person in such times. When I was keeping the boys safe during the attack that took my parents all I could think on was that they were trying to burn our stuff and what would I do for clothes. Knew it was a stupid fool thing to fret over but I think that happens because ye dinnae really want to think on the real cause of the anger and fear ye feel.”
“Yes. That is probably true. After all, the real cause will be waiting for you to face it when you step out.”
“What I saw was that my parents had died in each other’s arms.”
“That is both sad and lovely.”
He laughed but it was not a happy sound. “I ken it. Do ye think he will quit now?” Iain hoped she would say no because he did not want to have to explain why he thought this would go on until the man was dead.
“No. It will never stop until Albert is dead in the ground.”
He tightened his arm around her shoulders. “Good that ye see that. I ken ye have said something similar before but was worried ye had talked yourself into changing your mind.”
Emily sat up and stared at him. “No. I feel a bit sick when I say it, as it is such a horrible thing to want, but I know this will only end when Albert is dead. He will never give up.”
Iain finished his cider, then stood up, pulling her to her feet as well. Wrapping an arm around her shoulders he took her inside and placed their cups on the kitchen counter. He held her hand and peered out into the hallway. He could hear his brothers all gathered in the parlor so he went quickly to the stairs and dragged Emily up them. She hesitated a moment when he led her to his door.
“I saw Neddy going with Mrs. O’Neal’s children. Did he come back?” he asked in a whisper.
“No, but all your brothers are right downstairs,” she replied in a voice as soft as his.
“And willnae come in my room. Nay without warning.”
He opened his door, tugged her inside, and with a last peek down the hallway, shut the door and latched it. Emily stood looking at him. She looked nervous and he smiled gently as he walked up to her and tugged her into his arms.
“Alone at last,” he murmured, and was pleased to hear her laugh softly. “I have a craving to prove we both survived. Understand?”
“Yes. I have a craving to forget it all for a time. Is that wrong?”
“Nay, love. It is not so different from what I seek.”
He kissed her. Emily curled her arms around his neck and held on tight. She had the fleeting thought that he could not understand what he did to her with his kiss and she did not want him to. Then all the power would be in his hands and that did not seem fair. Then he slid his hand down her back and pressed her even closer to him. She felt his hardness and decided the power was in her hands as well. Emboldened by that realization she began to undo his shirt.
She smoothed her hands over his chest once she had opened his shirt, reveling in the strength and heat beneath her fingers. When he released her mouth to kiss her neck, she tilted her head to give him better access and trembled slightly from the strength of the feelings he stirred within her. Emily became so lost to the way he made her feel she did not even twitch as he undid her gown. She even tugged her own arms free of the sleeves as he tugged the gown down.
Iain tried not to tear anything as he carefully undressed her. Her touch on his skin was making him desperate, however. When he got her stripped down to her shift he pushed her toward the bed until she sat down on the edge. He quickly shed his boots and then knelt to deal with her shoes. Unable to stop himself he ran his hands over her slender legs every chance he got only to discover, to his delight, that Emily was extremely sensitive to such a touch. As he undid her garters and tugged off her stockings, he kissed each newly bared patch of skin. The soft sounds of pleasure escaping her were music to his ears.
Once he had her stripped to only her shift, he stood up and began to shed his own clothes. The way Emily watched him, her eyes wide yet still warmed with passion, made him hesitate a moment before taking off his drawers. Emily was still new to this intimacy and he did not wish to shock her out of her state of desire. Then Iain shrugged and removed them, tossing them to the side. The way she stared at his groin made him a little uneasy until she reached out and stroked him.
He yanked off her shift and gently pushed her down onto the bed. “Nay, love, ye cannae do that. Nay now. I am a desperate man.”
“Oh? That makes you desperate?” she asked as she wrapped her arms around his neck.
“Ye make me desperate.”
He kissed her and Emily murmured her pleasure. The way his naked body was pressed all along the length of hers would be impossible for her to describe. Every brush of his warm, taut skin and crisp hair made her pulse dance madly and her desire for him grow until she ached.
Then his mouth left hers and he kissed his way down to her breasts. He kissed her there and then suckled her like a babe. The ache she suffered from centered itself low in her belly, and Emily was shocked when she realized she had been rubbing herself against him. She was just discovering that that motion felt very good when he slid his hand down over her stomach and between her legs. She cried out softly when he slid a finger inside of her.
&nbs
p; “Ah, love, ye heat up for me so quickly, thank heaven,” he said against the swell of her breast.
Emily could not think of what to respond to that and then forgot about even speaking when he replaced his finger with that part she had no name for. With a quiet cry of pleasure she wrapped her legs around him.
Iain moved slowly at first, holding on to just enough control to keep his thrusts slow and deep. Emily’s breathing grew faster and uneven and then her body tightened around him. He caught her cry of release in his mouth then continued to kiss her as he thrust harder, faster, and found his own pleasure. Pressing his forehead against hers he managed to keep most of his weight off her as he rode it out, then he pulled away and rolled to the side. It was an effort but he wrapped his arms around her and tugged her hard up against his side, pleased to feel that she was as wrung out as he was.
For several minutes they just sprawled there, their breathing growing more steady.
Emily began to come to her senses and then wondered if she should say anything.
Unfortunately, she could think of nothing to say. Although her knowledge of such matters was not enough to fill a thimble, she had once heard a woman speak of pillow talk. The woman had been quickly hushed, however. So what did one say after such an event, she wondered.
Iain rolled onto his side, saw the faint line between her brows, and said, “Oh, I forgot to clean us off. Be just a moment.”
Already blushing, Emily watched as he walked over to the washbowl, poured some water in, and wet a rag. The man was completely comfortable walking around naked. She wished she could have such confidence but she had already tugged the sheet up until it covered her. He washed, rinsed the rag, then marched back and cleaned her off. Emily thought her face would burst into flames, her blushes felt so hot. After he rinsed and set aside the rag, he crawled back into bed and pulled her into his arms. It took a moment but then she realized he was stroking her back much the way he stroked a nervous horse.
“What are you doing?” she asked, putting her hands on his chest and pushing herself up enough to see his face.
“Weel, ye were looking a wee bit discomforted,” he said.
She looked down at his chest and idly petted flat the hair sprinkled there. “I am unaccustomed to doing this and know none of the rules.”
“There are rules, are there?”
“I am certain there must be.”
He cupped his hand under her chin, tilted her face up to his, and brushed a kiss over her mouth. “The only rule is to be sure ye give each other pleasure.”
She sighed and rested her cheek against his chest. “That seems impossibly simple.”
“Not everything can have a set of rules to it, love. There are rules all round this, and we’ve broken most of them, but none for the act itself except to give pleasure and not hurt each other.”
Emily thought about all the rules they had broken and she ought to be deeply ashamed. Yet, she was not, not in the slightest. All she felt was some unease because she did not know how this man she had given herself to felt about her. He so easily called her “ love” but she doubted he meant it as she would like him to. The fact that she loved him made his lack of love words, and the promises that came with them, all the harder to bear.
She sat up, clutching the sheet to her chest and ignoring how the action bared so much of his tall, muscular body. “I best slip off to my own room now.”
Iain sat up and pulled her into his arms. “Why? Neddy is staying at the O’Neals, aye? There is no one to ken ye are missing from your own bed.”
“But we have already done that,” she protested weakly as he tugged the sheet away and began to kiss her breasts.
“Are ye sore?”
“No.”
“Then I think we should take advantage of our time alone as it is so rare.”
* * *
Emily slowly opened her eyes and was disoriented for a moment. Then she recalled where she was and turned her head to see Iain sleeping soundly. Glancing toward the window she saw the dim light of dawn starting to color the sky. She slid out of bed and yanked on her shift. Gathering up the rest of her clothes, she crept out of the room and dashed across the hall to hers. Once inside, she tossed aside her clothes and climbed into her own bed.
She could not believe she had stayed the night with Iain. That was risky and probably foolish. Now she was painfully aware of how alone she was in her own bed. She craved his warm body next to hers, the way he idly curled an arm around her waist and tugged her close. It was a mistake to have stayed the night with him because now she would be plagued by all she did not have.
Like his love, she thought, then cursed. She could not be sure what he felt for her aside from lust and she had overheard enough talk to know a man could feel lustful toward many ladies. Emily wondered if there was a way to prompt him to declare himself but quickly shook aside that thought. He might tell her he did no more than lust after her and she could not bear to hear that.
Closing her eyes, she tried to clear her mind. It would be a while before she needed to rise and she intended to spend that time catching up on all the sleep she lost last night in Iain’s bed. She set her mind on planning how, and what, to clean up after the fire and soon felt sleep creep over her.
Chapter Thirteen
Glancing up, Iain found all of his brothers gathered around him and frowning at him. “Dinnae ye lot have some work to do?” He had a bad feeling about what they felt compelled to talk to him about.
“A lot of it, but we decided we needed to talk to ye first,” said Matthew.
“And just why do ye need to do that now when we are together most every day, all day long?”
“Because Matthew just decided it,” muttered Robbie, and Matthew slapped him on the back of the head. “Weel, ye did.”
“Before ye two knock each other senseless, why dinnae ye just ask me what ye want to.” He noticed they all looked somewhat uncomfortable and decided it would not be bad.
“Iain, what game are ye playing with Miss Emily?” Nigel asked, and ignored Matthew’s glare.
“Miss Emily? I believe it is Lady Emily.”
“Ye said that without even the hint of a sneer.”
“Why would I sneer?” He almost laughed at the narrow-eyed look each brother gave him. “Ah, because she is a lady, one of the gentry?”
“She is not like that bitch who sat calmly on her horse watching as ye and Geordie nearly burnt to death and our parents fought vainly to get to ye. Hell, Emily was just a child when all that happened. Ye cannae be holding all that against her,” said Nigel.
“Nay. Not now. It just bites a wee bit every now and again,” Iain said.
“Toughen your skin then,” snapped Matthew. “Even if Emily was of an age to have been a part of all that, she would not have been. She wouldnae have the stomach for it.”
“Nay, she doesnae. Never has.” He smiled faintly recalling the day he had caught her playing like a wild child with the kittens in the stables, then getting so upset when one of them nearly got stomped on by a horse. “I admit it took me a while but I did conclude that she wasnae one’s usual example of English gentry.” He tossed a shovelful of stable muck into the cart, causing Matthew to leap aside and swear at him.
“Damnation, Iain! If we have to stand and listen to Mrs. O’Neal lecture us, ye can bloody weel listen to us,” Matthew yelled as he carefully checked to make sure none of what Iain was shoveling had gotten on his clothes.
“Mrs. O’Neal had a word with you?” He stood the shovel up and rested his arm on the handle as he looked at each one of his brothers. “Burned your ears with a lecture about me, did she?”
“Aye,” Robbie muttered, then glanced at Iain and blushed. “She is concerned about Emily. She said Emily has been through so much, lost too much, to be played with by you.”
“She thinks I am playing?”
Matthew shrugged. “I think Mrs. O’Neal sometimes has a harsh opinion of men.”
Iain chuckled
and shook his head. “She thinks of us as all just boys, but, aye, she does have some odd, and stinging, opinions of men. Obviously, her Tommy was the only exception. I am nay playing with Emily.”
“Then what are ye doing?”
“Damned if I ken.” Iain shoveled up some more muck and nearly laughed at the way his brothers hastily stepped back. “The lass is educated. I am not. The lass is gentry born and bred. I am not. The lass has, and always has had, money and I do not have much of that at all. I could go on but I think ye see what I speak of.”
All his brothers frowned at him and Iain sighed. “She and I are as different as night and day. I can think on her and me and see it working out weel and other times I can see it being the worst of disasters.”
“So what the hell are you going to do?” Robbie asked.
“I thought I would woo her and see how that works.”
“Woo her?” Matthew shook his head and stared up at the stable loft. “Ye are doing this all backwards. Ye should woo her then bed her, nay bed her and then woo her, ye daft fool.”
Iain shrugged. “I suspicion more do it the other than ye ken.”
His younger brothers looked thoughtful before nodding. Their silent agreement swiftly ended when the three older ones scowled at them. Iain decided it was a good thing Emily did not know how many were discussing their intimate secrets or they would all pay dearly. He knew it was undoubtedly wrong for him to care so little for Emily’s need for secrecy and discretion, but Iain knew that he only catered to that need because he wanted to. He had no concern himself about who knew she was his lover.
Once he pushed aside the pinch of guilt that crept over him, he thought of all that had passed between him and Emily. Emily had been willing, her passion running as hot and urgent as his. There had been no denial of his attentions and little hesitation. Since thinking of Emily’s passion immediately caused his body to harden, Iain forced himself to clear his mind of all thought, all hint of desire, until his body relaxed.
The Scotsman Who Saved Me Page 15
