“So he would fuck you,” Tori spoke in her blunt way as they laid in Katya's bed. “And then he'd sit down with Wulf and tell him everything you guys did together. And then basically Wulf would be like that's hot, see what else you can get her to do, see if she'll deep throat or use a sex swing or whatever. And then Liam would, and he'd tell Wulf, and then you and Wulf would do those things?”
“This is all my fault,” Katya whispered.
“Don't you ever say that again.”
“No, it's true. If I hadn't slept with Liam, none of this would've happened. Maybe it's karma – I was kind of using Liam to become more sexually open. This is my punishment.”
“Katya, there's a big fucking difference between you having a casual, acknowledged, open relationship with a man, and a man lying to your fucking face while he shares all your most intimate details with another man, in the hopes that other man will have just as good a time with you. Holy shit, that is so fucked up.”
“That's what I said. I told them they need help.”
“They need to get their balls stepped on.”
“Liam might like that.”
“I'm quitting,” Tori suddenly jerked upright.
“What? No! You can't do that, you need that job. Jan said you don't have to come in tomorrow, to take the day off with pay,” Katya assured her, clinging tight to her arm.
“Are you kidding? I don't care if I have to suck dick to pay rent – at least then I'd know the money was coming from a better man than Liam Edenhoff,” Tori swore. Katya actually started laughing.
“Please,” she panted. “Please, don't quit. Just wait. Let's settle down.”
Tori stopped struggling with her and laid back down.
“You're right. I won't quit.”
“Good.”
“Because we need a mole on the inside.”
“That's good, I – wait, what?”
“I don't want either of them trying to run this scam on anyone else. I'm gonna stay there, as a spy,” Tori assured her.
“Oh. Uh … okay.”
Katya didn't really need a “mole on the inside”, but she did need Tori to pay her rent on time.
“I'm really, really sorry,” Tori whispered a couple hours later, smoothing Katya's hair out of her face. “I know you liked him.”
“I think I might have loved him,” Katya cried.
“I know you don't want to hear this, but I think … I believe Wulf cared about you, too. Maybe like how a sociopath would care about a cat, but comparatively speaking, that's a lot. You touched him, Katya. Through all the bullshit and game playing and crazy sex, I really believe you touched his heart,” Tori insisted.
“Pity it didn't help him.”
“No, it didn't.”
“No. All it did was break me.”
26
Katya woke up some time later in the middle of the night. It was disgustingly humid in the room, made hotter by Tori sharing the bed with her. Katya slid to the end of the mattress and stood up, stretching onto her toes.
She grabbed her phone and headed into the bathroom. There were multiple missed calls and messages. All but one were from Liam.
Only one text from Wulf. Sent about an hour before she'd woken up, at two-thirty in the morning.
You promised me.
Boiling hot rage bubbled through her veins. He was reminding her of her promises? Promises to what, love him and stand up for him? Be there when he needed someone? Yeah right, more like he needed a toy to play with, an object to hold. Needed to control her and consume her. Own her. How could he possibly say that to her? She had needed him, and he'd let her down. Ripped the bottom out of her world. Lied, manipulated, made a mockery of – that's all he'd ever done to her. She felt so stupid.
I thought I could play in their world. That I could be a sex kitten. But I'll never be that girl from the profile. I'm just boring old beige Katya Tocci. I was out of my league.
No. NO. She would not fall into that trap. Liam may have helped, but Katya had made the decision to go out with him. Katya had walked into that club, and Katya had agreed to sleep with him. She had taken the leap, all on her own, without help from either of them. She was strong, and she was brave. She could be anything she goddamn wanted to be.
I'll show them that we're not even playing in the same league.
She started yanking open drawers in the bathroom and pulling out all their beauty products. She always wore her fresh-face makeup. Cute and innocent. Screw that – those men had fucked away cute and innocent a long time ago. She dragged some thick black eyeliner across her lids, then smudged up the line, giving herself a trashy, sexy, smokey eye. Next she found a deep red lipstick that looked great against her skin, so she put it on extra heavy, making her lips looker fuller. Pouty-er. Perfect. She raked her hair up into messy bun on top of her head, called it good, then left the bedroom.
She ran on tip toes into Tori's room and started rifling through the other girl's dresser. They were different sizes, but similar heights, and could occasionally swap clothes. Tori was a much sexier dresser, though, and that's what Katya was looking for right then.
She found a black fitted crop top. Or was it a bustier? It showed a lot of tit and all her stomach, that's all that mattered. A couple pins in the back and she had it fitting snug on her body. She wiggled into some tiny, almost microscopic, black shorts, then looked in a full length mirror.
It was probably more skin than she'd ever shown in an outfit. Awkward pins and all, the top still looked amazing on her, and even barefoot, her legs looked about a mile long. That brought back a memory from a lifetime ago. Wulf calling, asking her on their second date. She'd been so surprised – why on earth would Wulfric Stone want to see her again?
“Because you have amazing legs.”
She'd thought it was just flirting. Now she knew it was only because Liam had asked to see her again.
She stormed back into the bathroom and only turned on the lights over the mirror. She leaned backwards and forwards, trying to find the best angle for her cleavage that would still show some of her body. She held her hand awkwardly above her head, made a duck face, then took a picture. Popped out her hip, took another picture. Winked, another pic. Licked her lips, another pic.
After about ten photos, she went into the living room and powered up her laptop. She transferred all the pictures to her computer, then looked through them. She didn't even recognize herself. All the makeup and the close up lighting had washed out her face a little, making her skin look flawless. Her chest was caught in the bright light, the rest of her body carved out of shadows, making her look curvy in all the right places. The red lips and smokey eyes completed the look. She looked like a walking, talking advert for sex. Raw, nasty, raunchy, filthy, sex.
The first picture she'd taken, that was the one. Her pursing her lips, blowing a kiss. Her lids at half mast, giving her bedroom eyes. Her breasts thrust high and center stage, demanding a second glance.
Fucking perfect.
She found her way to a website she hadn't visited in over a month. Dusted off a profile and reactivated it. Since she'd never changed anything and had only deactivated, all the original info was still there. Still the same party girl with some sexy personal hobbies – but now, that girl had the picture to match. She uploaded the duck face pic to the profile, then picked up her phone.
She had to redownload the Eros dating app, but once she did, she went straight to her own profile. There was the sexy party girl, blowing her a kiss from the top of the screen. Talking about being kinky at the bottom of the screen. Absolutely perfect.
She put down the phone. Shut off the laptop. Leaned back into the sofa and stared at the ceiling. It was so quiet in the apartment, she could hear her own heartbeat.
I don't need them. I don't need them. I don't need them.
“Kat?” Tori sounded sleepy from the hallway. “Why are you sitting in the dark?”
Katya took a deep breath.
“It's the only pla
ce I feel comfortable,” she whispered.
“What?”
“Nothing, let's go back to bed.”
She scrubbed off the make up and changed into pajamas. Crawled onto her bed and pressed her back against Tori's. As she closed her eyes, she took a couple more deep breaths, trying to keep the tears at bay.
Looks like little Katya Tocci finally grew up.
To Be Continued ...
SOUNDTRACK
Songs that I listened to while writing, songs that made me think of the story, and a couple that inspired actual scenes.
● Sia – Cheap Thrills
● Caterina Valente – Kiss of Fire
● Lisa Fischer – Ruler of My Heart
● Creedance Clearwater – I Put A Spell On You
● Ke$ha – Dirty Love
● Ariana Grande – Dangerous Woman
● Bryan Ferry – Slave to Love
● Zayn Malik – Pillowtalk
● Nick Jonas ft. Tove Lo – Close
● Lo-Fang – Boris
● The Chainsmokers – Don't Let Me Down
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
I went through a super long dry spell. I wrote The Bad Ones in December of 2015. Of course there was lots of editing and rewriting that happened, but the rough draft and main content were done in December.
And then I didn't write anything else until August of 2016.
Oh, for sure, I started things. Started lots of things. Even got up to 40,000 words on one story (about half of an average length novel). But nothing stuck. Everything felt forced, I wasn't into it. Since publishing, that was the longest stretch of time I've gone without completing some kind of work. It wasn't even necessarily writer's block – I just didn't WANT to work.
I had gone through a move, I'm sure that had something to do with it. When things finally settled down, I went back home for a visit. One morning, I had a bizarre dream. I've been writing for basically my entire life, and I have never dreamed about my characters or written one of my dreams down.
I literally dreamed I was brainstorming a story. It was like watching a movie, while plotting it. I can remember coming up with their names so clearly, Liam's and Wulf's. Wulfric Stone was first, like he was introducing himself to me. Eden was second. Then Katya and Liam in the sex club, the crazy wild sex they had, everything, all the way up until she meets Wulf in her bakery. It was crazy! My brain did all the work while I was sleeping! Why can't it ALWAYS be like that!?
So yes, everything from the first word till Wulf meets Katya, is exactly how it was in my dream. I had no clue if it was going to take off or not, but the ideas kept pouring out.
As always, enough thanks cannot be said to Ratula. #CONGRATULATIONS, bitch, book number four in the bag! Through thick and thin, bitch fests, laugh fests, documentaries, scary movies, Tiny Dog – I look forward to our conversations each and every day, and I just want to say thank you for being an amazing friend.
For this book, I added a whole new slew of beta readers because it's fun to have strangers tell you when your stuff sucks, HAHA! No, but with every book, I usually add a new reader or two, to keep things fresh. This book, I added something like SEVEN. Some I'd never interacted with prior to them beta reading. And it was awesome, you all helped immensely, it was an amazing experience.
So thank you to my OGs, Angie, Sunny, Letty, Jo, Rebecca, Lheanne, Rebeka, Shannon, and Sue. Some of you have been there since the very first book – even the ones that haven't been published! Most have helped me since Separation. So thank you for sticking with me for so long.
To my new betas – Andrea, Jennifer, Berenice, Tink, Jennifer G., Deanna Pinklady, and Bex, you more than did a good job. You all proved to have great insights and wonderful advice, and taught me so many things. Sex clubs usually don't sell booze! I had no clue! Thank god you all filled out the form, this book wouldn't be half as good without you.
Thank you to Champagne Formats and Qamber Designs for giving me some of the best looking books out there! Each and every one are stunning, in my humble opinion, and your work harmonizes so well with my vision. Thanks so much.
Special thanks to Christine at Shh Mom's Reading. You've done all my releases since Reparation, but you weren't able to do this book. I'm so sad that aspect of our relationship is over, but so excited and happy for your new adventures. Thank you for six amazing releases.
A NEW thanks to The Rock Stars of Romance, for stepping in at kind of the last minute and handling the release of this book. I'm a nervous person by nature, I don't deal well with “meeting” new people, online or otherwise, so it was important for me to deal with people I “knew”, or who would get me. Milasy, you've always been amazing and supportive, thank you for helping out so quickly when I messaged you. Lisa, you're a rock star, and I wonder when/if you ever sleep – thank you for making this smooth and painless for someone like me, who expects everything to be difficult and uncomfortable.
Of course, thank you to every blog that has shared, posted, read, reviewed, done giveaways, made teasers, all of the above and everything beyond. What you do every day is amazing and when I feel like complaining, I try to picture what it's like to run a wordpress site, and then I shut up. Thank you so much.
All the readers. Each and every single one. Authors, bloggers, reviewers, stay at home moms, people reading at their desks at work. In bed at night, in their car in a parking lot, whenever there's spare time. Thank you for liking my words. This never gets easier and each time I'm sure it's going to be the worst book ever, but you all prove me wrong every time. I have a very magical profession – thank you for allowing me to pursue it.
To Mr. F. It's been an interesting year. Awful and wonderful and strange. I'm glad it happened, and I will be glad when it's over, but most of all, I'm glad you love me. Thank you for being such a big part of my life and for shaping me into the person I am today.
THE NEIGHBORHOOD
A Twin Estates Novel
excerpt
Breathe. Breathe. Don't think. Breathe. Breathe. Did I sign that paperwork the office sent over? Breathe. Breathe. Have to check that escrow deal. Breathe. Breathe. God, what is she doing right now. How did this get so fucked up. I knew I should have fucking listened to myself and walked – DON'T THINK. Breathe. Breathe.
While Wulfric Stone's natural habitat was an Olympic sized swimming pool, it wasn't the only form of exercise he got – he had a stressful job, he had lots of different ways of burning off the tension. Running came a close second to swimming for clearing his head. It created a different sort of burn in his muscles, created a whole new plethora of aches and pains.
Sometimes, when he was particularly angry about something, he preferred it over swimming. After doing a couple miles worth of laps, he could just float away. Literally. Lay on his back and be weightless for a while. Not with running, though. How cruel – a sport that takes a person miles away from their starting point, and if they push themselves too hard, it just means they have to turn around and do the same distance back. Feel like collapsing? No weightless pond to float in. No, the best case scenario meant hopefully finding a cool patch of grass to collapse onto and pray his muscles didn't cramp up while gravity put pressure on every limb.
Yes, running was a very punishing sport, and Wulfric Stone was a bad man who definitely deserved punishment.
Breathe. Breathe.
His calves were burning and sweat was pouring down his body. He was pretty sure his lungs were getting ready to stage a coup and walk out on him. Still, he kept pushing, pounding his feet down harder against the ground.
How can I breathe when she's not here to help me?
Wulf let out a frustrated shout and ripped his earphones off. This wasn't working. He slowed to a stop. He knew it was a bad idea, he should jog for a while, reducing his pace slowly, but fuck it. Running away from his problems clearly wasn't helping. Maybe a massive charlie horse would successfully distract him.
Or maybe he could have a heart attack, that would be perfect.<
br />
He veered off the pathway, heading straight into the woods. San Francisco was entering fall and as a breeze hit his sweat slicked skin, he shivered. He grabbed the hem of his t-shirt and brought it to his forehead, mopping up sweat. When he lowered the material, he glanced around and realized he'd wandered so far, he couldn't see where the trail was anymore.
Good. Maybe I'll be lost in here forever. That would solve everything. Jesus, how did everything get so fucked up?
It was a rhetorical question – Wulf knew the answer. He had fucked it all up. Broken his own rules, gone against his own advice, and look what had happened. He was a mess, wandering around in the woods, cursing at trees.
Worse, was he'd known just how bad the ending between could be, he'd seen it all unraveling from early on, and he'd tried to avoid it by doing what he did best. Being an asshole. After all, if he told her about their little scam, she'd leave him. If he didn't tell her and she found out, she'd leave him. If Liam told her, she'd leave him. It seemed to Wulfric that the only possible outcome was Katya leaving him.
So, like a true gentleman, Wulf left her first.
Why did she come back? If she'd just stayed away, everything would be fine. Fucking fine.
Except it wouldn't be fine. He'd be a shell of man – or at least, a worse version than the one he'd already been – and she'd be convincing herself Liam was the perfect guy for her. Wulf couldn't stand that thought. Couldn't bear the idea of Liam touching her and kissing her and seeing her naked and making her sigh and gasp.
“AH!”
His fist slammed into the tree before he even knew his arm was moving. He hadn't pulled the punch at all, striking the trunk as hard as he could, but Wulf barely felt anything. He was numb.
So he hit it again. And again. And didn't stop till blood was running down his fist, and even then, he still didn't feel a thing. It was only the red staining his white t-shirt that gave him pause.
Neighbors (Twin Estates #1) Page 30
