by Leela Ash
“Not great,” she sighed. “In fact, he made me feel terrible.”
“He was a jerk, Em,” Leanne said, getting to her feet. “Don’t feel guilty, you just didn’t work… You both want different things.”
“I guess,” Emma said. “I know you’re right. I just hate feeling like this, you know?”
“Sure,” Leanne smiled. “But you did the right thing, you couldn’t keep ignoring how you felt… He was never going to commit all the way, and he seemed to just think he could string you along…”
“Yeah.” Emma smiled meekly as she wiped a tear from the corner of her eye.
“Come on,” Leanne smiled. “Not only that, but now we’re free to let loose a bit.” She wiggled her eyebrows, and Emma couldn’t help but smile.
“Oh, God,” Emma rolled her eyes. “I dread to think what you have in mind…”
“Well, I’m not telling. You’ll just have to trust me.”
Leanne grinned and turned on her heel before making her way back to the counter and picking up her notebook and pen. It was nearly 5pm and it was getting busy in there. Emma let herself sink further into the couch, and she turned so her back was to the majority of the room. She didn’t want to risk seeing someone she knew who might ask how Dale was doing and where he was. That would be the last thing she needed, along with all of the awkward questions that would follow…
She sipped her drink and closed her eyes. It had been a long, emotionally draining day. All she wanted to do was go home and crawl into bed, but at the same time she wasn’t sure if she was ready to be alone. She opened her eyes and looked around. She noticed all of the happy couples sitting at the adjacent tables and she felt a small pang of jealousy. She had never wanted to end up single again, but she knew she had to be honest and true to herself, and Dale was never going to be the one.
On the table in front of her was a magazine aimed at women just her age. It was glossy and the cover had a gorgeous stick-thin model splashed across it with big, juicy, pouting lips. She opened it up and her eyes were instantly drawn to a two-page spread on dating for millennials. She shuddered at the thought.
Me, dating… she thought. I wouldn’t even know what to do.
It had been such a long time since she had dipped her toe in the dating pool, she hadn’t even heard of half of the things that were listed in the magazine’s guide. Out of nowhere there were apps for meeting people around you or by similar interest, there were hook-ups and hot-or-nots. It all seemed so scary and intimidating. Emma closed the magazine and threw it back on the table.
That is not for me, she thought. I think I’d rather stay single forever.
She picked up her coffee and finished it before getting to her feet. She swung her purse over her shoulder and made her way to the counter.
“I’m going to get going,” she said to Leanne.
“Okay, hon,” Leanne smiled and kissed her on the cheek. “What are your plans for tomorrow?”
She hadn’t even thought about it. The weekend loomed ahead, empty and terrifying.
“I don’t know,” she replied, “For once, I have absolutely nothing planned.”
“Good,” Leanne slapped her hands together. “I’ll be at your place at eight tomorrow night. I’ll bring some wine and we can have a few drinks before hitting the town.”
“Seriously?” Emma groaned. “I don’t think I’m ready to go out and be sociable.”
“What happened to restarting your life?” Leanne demanded. “That’s all you’ve talked about since you decided a few weeks ago that you were going to dump Dale, and now you’re backtracking.”
“I know, but…”
“No buts,” Leanne snapped. “This is exactly what you need, and I’m not taking no for an answer.”
Emma nodded her head and smiled. Although Leanne could be harsh with her and sometimes hard work, she did know how to bring her around and make her feel better.
“Okay,” Emma agreed, “I’ll see you at eight… Where are we going? What should I wear?”
“Don’t worry about that now,” Leanne grinned. “We can sort that out tomorrow. Just leave it to me.” She nodded at Emma with wide, confident eyes. “Now go home, get into bed, do your crying if you need to, and tomorrow you’ll be a new person and we’ll never speak about Dale again, okay?”
“Okay,” Emma smiled as she saluted her. “Thanks, Leanne. I appreciate it.”
“I know you do.” She tapped the cash register and it pinged. “Now go on, I don’t want to have to tell you twice.”
Emma laughed as she turned and walked towards the door, waving over her shoulder as she went.
3.
Emma slid her key into the lock and opened the front door to an empty house. The darkness loomed towards her, and as she flicked on the light, she had the overwhelming urge to slam it behind her and just run up to her bed. Instead, she closed it quietly, locked it behind her and walked slowly into the kitchen. It was early still, and even though she was exhausted, she felt like she owed it to herself to enjoy some alone time.
She opened the cupboard, grabbed a bottle of Rioja and set it down on the island. She looked around. It was the first time she realized that Dale had barely kept any of his possessions in her home. Even though he had pretty much lived there for the past year, his clothes and a toothbrush were all that he ever brought with him. Now he was gone, and everything still looked the same. All that was missing was him and the sound of a football game coming from the TV in the living room.
“This is good,” she said aloud. “Now I can watch anything I want, I can cook anything I want and hell, I can even drink wine every night if I want!” She laughed as she uncorked the wine and poured herself a large glass. She took a sip. It was warm, woody and smooth and slipped down her throat easily. She glugged it again and instantly felt a wave of calm wash over her.
“Perfect,” she whispered, before she scooped her purse up under her arm, the glass in one hand and the bottle in the other, and made her way down the hallway to the stairs.
Up in her room, she lit candles in every corner and some incense. She lay back on her bed and closed her eyes. She could easily get used to this. It was refreshing having her whole house to herself and knowing that no one was going to burst in and ruin the tranquility. She sipped the wine and turned on some soft music. She couldn’t believe she had actually been upset earlier! This was fantastic. Leanne was right. It was exactly what she needed, and she certainly wouldn’t be crying herself to sleep. She sat up and looked over at her closet. Leanne and her were hitting the town the following evening, and she didn’t even know if she had anything to wear. She turned the soft music over to dance music and skipped over to the closet, throwing the doors open and flicking through the hangers. She hadn’t even seen some of the dresses in there for years. Dale had never approved of some of them because they were too short. Apparently.
“You’re so boring, Dale,” Emma said to herself. She took another swig of wine and giggled. She couldn’t even remember the last time she had had a drink, and it felt good that she didn’t have to answer to anyone.
She pulled out a little black dress that was low cut and figure hugging. Emma had been blessed with a beautiful, large set of natural breasts to complement her soft, curvy frame, and she knew that she would look fantastic in it. She held it up against herself and smiled. She couldn’t wait to get back out there and start living. Tomorrow couldn’t come quickly enough.
***
She spent most of her Saturday spring cleaning and preparing for Leanne to arrive. She threw open all of the windows and let new air circulate through the house. She was determined to start again, and that meant rejuvenating everything in sight. She flicked through home magazines and began making a scrapbook. She could finally get around to decorating and making everything fresh and exciting. By the time it hit six o’clock, she was startled and couldn’t believe the whole day had passed her by. She went up to the shower and began getting ready. Leanne said she would be the
re at eight, and she wanted to get out of the house and hit the town as soon as possible.
At her dressing table, she looked at herself in the mirror. She had always been told that she was attractive, but she never really believed it… Or had it been Dale who made her question everything? After being away from him for twenty-four hours, she certainly felt free and unburdened from all of his negativity. Maybe Leanne was right; maybe he was a complete jerk.
She smoothed some ruby red lipstick across her lips and blotted it with a Kleenex. She looked alive again, as if she had been revived and given a second chance. She was about to give herself a little motivational speech about how she was a strong, fabulous woman and deserved the best in life when the doorbell echoed up the stairs and she jumped to her feet.
“Coming!” she called down the hall as she trotted down the stairs.
She opened the door to see Leanne standing in front of her with a bottle of white wine clutched in her fist.
“Let’s get this party started!” she laughed as she wrapped an arm around Emma and pulled her inside. “It is so goddamn good to have my best friend back.”
The girls sat at the island in the kitchen, and Emma poured them both a drink. She held her glass up to meet Leanne’s and they clinked them together.
“Cheers,” Leanne smiled.
“So,” Emma said, “Am I allowed to know where we’re going yet?”
“Hmm,” Leanne grinned and shrugged, “But that will spoil the surprise.”
“You know I hate surprises. Come on, tell me!” Emma said, jumping to her feet. She was too excited and needed to know so she could mentally plan how the night was going to pan out.
Leanne laughed and rolled her eyes.
“Okay,” she said cautiously. “I heard about something and I thought it would be good for both of us.”
“Sounds ominous,” Emma said with a giggle.
“Not really…” Leanne trailed off. “It’s going to be exciting, that’s for sure.”
“This is all very cryptic,” Emma said as she took a sip of her wine. “Just spit it out, come on.”
“Okay,” Leanne said as she rolled her shoulders and smiled. “Well, I heard about this beach party, and I thought it would be good if we went.”
“A beach party?” Emma said with disappointment. “Is that it? I thought we were going to be hitting some exclusive club and hanging out with celebrities!”
“Oh, this will be much more exciting than that, trust me,” Leanne said, raising her eyebrows.
“Well, you better tell me then, because I suddenly feel very overdressed.” Emma looked down at her tight LBD and held out her arms. She had felt so in control and sexy when she was putting it on, and now she knew there was no way she was going to be able to wear it. She couldn’t head down to the beach in that and four-inch heels. She would look ridiculous.
“I’m dressed up, too,” Leanne said sternly. “Plus, the beach isn’t the only place this party is going to be.”
“God, stop killing with me with the suspense and just tell me!” Emma grabbed hold of Leanne’s shoulders and shook her with joke fury.
“There’s an initiation ceremony down there,” she said quietly. “I heard about it because a friend of mine is going out with one of the bikers…”
“Bikers?” Emma asked, genuinely confused.
“Do you not watch the news?” Leanne said with a laugh. “The gang that’s basically been running this town for the past twenty years.”
“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” Emma shook her head.
“Well, all you really need to know is there’s a new wave of them, and they are sexy as hell… There isn’t a girl in this town who wouldn’t kill to do what we’re about to do tonight, and if you ask me, this is more than the perfect way to finally put Dale behind you.” Leanne was gripping onto her by the shoulders and smiling with wide, excited eyes.
“Are they dangerous?” Emma asked, concerned.
“Who knows…” Leanne bit her lip. “And even if they are, don’t you think that’s a turn-on?”
“When you say initiation, what exactly do you mean?”
“They’ve taken on some new members and they’re celebrating… My friend Jane is going to be down there with the guy she’s been seeing, and she invited me along.”
“And where is the party going to be after the beach?” Emma asked, still confused by the whole situation.
“Well,” Leanne said excitedly, “I’ve heard that if one of them likes you, they give you a ride back to the club house,” she squealed and clapped her hands together. “I mean, can you imagine that, Em? Being on the back of one of their bikes, flying down the highway on our way back to a secret party at an outlaw’s den!?”
“Jesus,” Emma laughed. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you so excited!” She got to her feet and sipped her wine. Everything about this seemed intimidating. Leanne was right when she had questioned Emma’s knowledge of their town with her not watching the news, but she hadn’t lived under a rock. She knew that there were outlaws around them and that they had a big say on how things went down. She knew that some people were afraid of them, and she also knew that if she had gone back a week and could look forward and see herself all dressed up, newly single and potentially heading over there, she never would have believed it.
“Come on,” Leanne said with pleading eyes. “If we don’t go, we’ll regret it, trust me. These parties are supposed to be amazing, and I’ve heard that if they take you back to the clubhouse, it’s like nothing you’ve ever seen.”
Emma sipped her drink again, hoping for Dutch courage. She had always wanted excitement in her life, and here it was being presented to her. She knew she should reach out and take it without asking questions. If she went and hated it, she could easily leave and come home. It wasn’t like she was stuck there. She had a cell phone and a hundred cab companies’ numbers saved in it. She was an adult and could go anywhere she wanted, whenever she wanted. Why should this party be so different and what did she have to lose?
“Okay,” she said with a smile, “I’m in!”
Leanne jumped up and hugged her and poured some more wine into her glass.
“You won’t regret it,” she beamed. “I know we’re going to have the night of our lives.”
“Well, if we don’t, you owe me another night out on the town next weekend. Deal?”
“Totally,” Leanne laughed. “Now let’s finish this bottle so we can get going. I can’t wait to get down there and see what these bad boys are all about!”
Emma smiled to herself as she stared into the mirror on the wall and reapplied her lipstick. She was looking forward to seeing what they were all about, too, and she certainly hoped that Leanne was right… She liked the idea of a man in leather with a dark side. It was as far away from Dale as she could possibly get, and she knew that it was exactly what she needed.
“Ready?” she called over her shoulder to Leanne, who was putting their glasses into the sink and scrolling through her cell phone.
“Yep,” she smiled. “Let’s get out of here!”
The girls linked arms and made their way to the front door. As they stepped out into the warm night air, Emma had a good feeling. She knew something fun was about to come her way, and she couldn’t have been more ready.
4.
The girls stepped out of the cab and turned to face the beach. The waves crashed against the shore, and the white hiss of spray met their legs. The sun was setting, and Emma shielded her eyes from the golden pink glow as she looked out to the ocean. In the distance, she could make out the silhouettes of a group of people all around a fire and spilling down out across the beach. There were about fifty of them and her heart began to race as she realized she was suddenly as nervous as if it were her first day of school. She didn’t know anyone down there. What if they just looked at her and Leanne as if they were crazy for showing up and wanted them to leave? Or worse, what if they got nasty? They were criminals, after all
. They could be capable of anything!
“Wait,” she whispered as she grabbed onto Leanne’s arm and pulled her back away from the entrance to the beach. “Do you really think this is safe?”
Leanne rolled her eyes at her and laughed.
“Oh, come on, Em, of course it is. What’s the worst that could happen?”
“I don’t know, I just… I’m having second thoughts…”
“Stop being so boring,” Leanne stared at her deep in the eyes. “I know we are going to have a great night. Now come on, let’s get down there and mingle!”
Emma nodded slowly and followed her friend out to the dunes. They slipped off their heels and carried them in their hands as they made their way down across the sand and onto the beach. Underfoot the sand was still warm and it instantly put Emma at ease. It felt wonderful between her toes, and the closer they got to the crowd of people and the fire, the more she began to relax. She could see other women around there, dancing, drinking, listening to music and sitting on the sides of bikes that had been ditched along the beach. The men were big and burly, some were older with long graying beards, but most were young and as Leanne had promised, exceptionally hot.
“Wow,” Emma whispered as she reached for Leanne’s hand. “You weren’t wrong.”
Leanne turned to her and smiled. “See, you’ve just got to trust me.”
They approached the group and slipped in among the crowd. The fire was the central focal point, but the party itself extended out across the rest of the beach. In the ocean, a man and woman frolicked naked and some of the men on their bikes revved their engines and cheered. They all drank beer and whisky from the bottle, and there was a cloud of smoke in the air as most of the men had cigarettes dangling from their lips. Emma bit her bottom lip and looked around. She almost didn’t know where she should fix her eyes. All of the men around her were so good looking, and they all seemed so incredibly ripped and powerful. They wore leathers and skull rings, and some of them had bandanas in their long, shaggy hair and others who had removed their clan jackets had aggressive tattoos all down their arms and across their backs. Emma found herself unable to take her eyes off one guy sitting a rock just outside the main circle. He held a bottle of whisky in his hand and was sipping it slowly. A tattoo of a spider crawled up his neck. She shuddered at the thought of trailing her hands over it. Each and every one of the bikers were wild and untamed. She was getting wet just looking at them.
