by Amber Garr
“Hey Eviana!” Daniel shouted from his seat at the counter. Sitting next to him was a tall but lanky blond boy with sharp cheekbones and a chiseled jaw. That must be Aleksey. I walked over to them.
“Hi Daniel. Did you sleep well?”
Both of the boys blushed and I almost died. I didn’t really want to know, it was just a polite question. “Yes. Thank you.”
My sister suddenly caught my attention. She sat at the table next to the young man I assumed was Quinlan. His bright red hair was a sharp contrast to her dark brown mane, but his cute face and numerous freckles made him irresistible. I could see why she was attracted to him. They both hunched over, talking and giggling and I watched them flirt openly with each other. Even though I thought that she was too young, I had to smile. This was the first time in a long time I saw her truly enjoying herself.
Daniel cleared his throat. “So how was your night?” He totally knew.
“Fine.”
“Mmm hmm,” he mumbled in his trademark way. I slapped his arm. “You’re beaming, Eviana.”
I guess that I was, although right now, I just wanted to see Brendan. “Have you seen him?” I asked. Daniel shook his head.
“No, but we just got here a few minutes before you.” He looked around the room and jerked his chin. “Maybe Julian knows.”
I followed his gaze to see the leader of the selkies standing with his arms crossed and leaning up against the doors that led to the deck. His black hair and tall, tanned body was still in impeccable shape even though he must have been in his mid-forties. He stared at me with sad green eyes and something about his look sent my stomach into a downward spiral. When he motioned for me to join him, I almost collapsed.
“What’s wrong?” Daniel asked.
I shrugged my shoulders and silently followed Julian out the sliding glass doors and to the farthest corner of the deck. My body trembled in anticipation like it knew something bad was coming. While everyone had been enjoying their morning, Julian looked miserable. My heart climbed into my throat as I forced myself to ask the question.
“Do you know where Brendan is?” Silence. I almost thought he wasn’t going to answer me, but finally he nodded.
“Yes, I do.” More silence followed and I fought the urge to shake him.
“Well, will you tell me where? I need to talk to him.” The sinking feeling in my gut continued to grow but I tried to maintain my composure.
Julian sighed. “He’s gone back to our house,” he turned and looked down at me, “to pack his bags.”
I immediately let out the breath I’d been holding. “Good. So he decided to move in here.” I smiled and leaned over the railing to glance down the beach, hoping to see him walk this way. He was coming back for good.
Julian laid his hand on top of mine. “Eviana…” Suddenly a train slammed into my chest. I heard it in his tone before he spoke the words. “Brendan’s not moving in with you.”
Yanking my arm away, I stepped back and nearly tripped over myself. “What do you mean?”
Julian brushed a hand through his dark, curly hair and looked up at the sky. “He found me early this morning and we had a long talk.” When he didn’t continue I raised my eyebrows telling him to go on. “He’s been feeling the call for several weeks, but I think he was afraid to admit it to himself.”
I almost fell to the ground. The call? No, it couldn’t be. “What are you talking about, Julian?” I snapped.
“It started in Seattle. Not long after we arrived.” He paced along the deck. “At first I thought he just missed you. But then I saw it in his mind.”
“What?” I gasped.
He rolled his head, seemingly trying to release some of the tension. “I’m sort of…telepathically connected to all of these selkies.” He waited for me to comment and when I didn’t, he continued. “That’s why I have the persuasion I do. They kind of see me like an alpha.”
“Brendan told me about that.”
“Good. Then you understand.” He stopped walking and stood right in front of me. “I’ve felt the pull through other selkie’s minds. I’ve been there myself so I knew that’s what Brendan was experiencing.”
The only way for me not to cry was to get angry. “So why did he come here then? Why did he spend last night with me?”
Julian winced. “He shouldn’t have done either of those things and I told his as much. But he wanted you to be enough.” I snorted and glared at him. “What I mean is that he wanted his life with you to be enough to overpower the call. He loves you very much, Eviana.”
I stepped away from him again. “Well, obviously he doesn’t or he wouldn’t keep hurting me over and over!” My chest tightened and my throat clamped shut. I tried so hard not to cry.
Julian’s green eyes glistened with tears, too. “I am sorry this is happening to the two of you but…”
“You told me it would,” I snapped. He nodded and I repressed every urge in my body to punch him. This wasn’t Julian’s fault. He just had the misfortune of being the messenger. I started to move toward the deck stairs. “I’m going to go see him.”
Julian grabbed my arm and pulled me back. “You can’t,”
“Get your hands off me,” I screamed through gritted teeth. He obliged, but the fight slowly seeped from my body as despair began to take over.
“You can’t see him because he’s already gone.”
“What? You said he was packing?”
“He was. But I’m sure he’s gone by now.” Julian looked at me with so much pity in his eyes, it infuriated me. I didn’t need someone feeling sorry for me. I needed to talk to Brendan. I turned to walk to their house again. “Eviana! He left this for you.”
I whipped my body around to see Julian holding a folded piece of paper in his outstretched arm. “What is it?”
“His goodbye.”
And that was it. I crumpled to the deck and began to sob. Julian rushed to my side but instead of grabbing me, he laid the note down in my lap and gently kissed the top of my head.
“I am sorry.”
Brendan was really gone. After collapsing on the deck and watching Julian disappear inside the house, I sat there and cried. The note burned a hole in my hands but I couldn’t bring myself to read it. Not yet.
At some point, I gathered myself enough to leave the deck and hide out in the garage. The guest house was up above, but the entrance was on the outside so no one should bother me in here. I sat inside my dad’s old classic MGB and cried until I didn’t have any tears left.
My heart broke into a thousand shards; slicing every nerve with their sharp edges. If Brendan really felt the call to mate with a human, then he was lost to me forever. Last night had been so wonderful - I simply couldn’t understand how my world could implode in such a short amount of time.
A part of me was so angry with him. If he knew I wasn’t going to be enough, then why did he come to my bed last night? Why would he say all of those things to me? Why did he love me?
But that was it. He loved me and wanted that to be enough just like I’d always dreamed. I suppose if I was really honest with myself, I’d admit that somewhere deep down I knew this would happen to us. As much as it hurt right now, perhaps this was for the best. I wouldn’t have to worry about accidentally controlling him and he wouldn’t have to fear his instinctual fate.
I looked down at the crumpled note in my hands and took a deep breath. He didn’t even give this to me himself. That was something I may never forgive him for. Then I thought about the note I’d left on my bed for Kain the night Brendan and I ran away and realized how hypocritical I was being. Neither of us deserved happiness with the way that we treated those we loved. With shaky hands, I opened the note.
Evs-
I will probably never be able to convince you of how much I wanted this to be enough. I missed you with every fiber of my being and I will always cherish our time together. My father warned me, as did Julian. I refused to accept my fate.
I wish I could tell
you what I’m feeling but it is so overwhelming that I can’t find the words. Please know that I have not succumbed completely to the call, but it also won’t allow me to love you the way you deserve to be loved.
You are special. You are sexy. And you are a leader. I am so proud of you and what you’ve become. It saddens me that we won’t be able to share our lives together, but know I’ll always have a place for you in my heart.
I am sorry-
Brendan
I must have read it ten times. Getting a “Dear John” note was not the best way to breakup, although there was a part of me thankful he said at least something.
The thought of him running off to start a family was just devastating. Maybe he’d be able to fight it. Maybe he wouldn’t find anyone. Maybe he’d come back to me. But the odds were stacked against us. Maybe I should just stick to my own kind.
At some point I saw light slip inside when someone opened the door to the garage. “Eviana? Are you in here?”
Great. It was Kain. Literally the last person that I wanted to see right now. Maybe if I didn’t say anything, he’d leave. “I know you’re in here.” Maybe not.
“I’m over here,” I yelled while wiping my puffy eyes and snotty nose. There was no mistaking that I’d been crying for the last hour.
Kain mumbled a curse when he bumped into something but then emerged and looked at me. “Why are you sitting in the dark?”
“Why not?”
He snorted. “Mature, Eviana.” I watched him come closer to the car and I could tell the moment he saw my face. “What happened?”
I waved my hand with the note. “Brendan happened.”
Kain took a deep breath and pointed to the empty driver’s seat. “May I?” I nodded and he climbed inside. After admiring the car for a moment he shifted in his seat to face me better. “I’m really sorry, Eviana.”
I slammed my head back against the seat and closed my eyes. “You shouldn’t be. I deserve this.”
“Why would you think that?” he asked sincerely.
“I’ve done nothing but treat you badly and now karma has slapped me in the face.”
“Is he really gone this time?” His voice sounded light but there was something else hidden underneath.
“Yes. He felt the call. There’s no coming back now.” I hurriedly wiped at the tears on my cheeks.
“Well then, I really am sorry. I know how much you cared for him.”
“I love him.”
“I know.” Kain sighed and I remained silent. This would normally be incredibly awkward but my nerves were so frazzled I barely felt anything. “I never told you, but I saw you leave that night.”
“What? When?”
“The night you and Brendan left California.”
I cringed and rolled my head to look the other way. After spending the day as Kain’s fiancée and sharing our first and only kiss, I left him just hours before we were to be married. “I’m sorry,” I grumbled.
“I’m not telling you this to make you feel bad. I’m telling you because I want you to know that I get it. When I saw the look on your face when he picked you up, I knew our marriage would never be what I wanted it to be.”
“Kain…”
He held up his hand to stop me. “I knew you cared about me, but it was obvious how much you loved Brendan. I can only wish that someday I can experience a love like that.”
“Is this supposed to make me feel better?”
He smiled slightly and shook his head. “No. I just want you to know I really am sorry it didn’t work out with you two.” There was really nothing for me to say to that.
“You were so mad at me,” I whispered.
“Yes, I was. Sure I was mad that I’d lost you, but what hurt worse was the way you did it.”
I lifted my hand. “You mean like in a note?”
“Yes. And without any warning. You left me in a tough position. Everyone wanted me to join your mother in support of your shunning and everyone expected me to be angry.” He leaned back in his seat. “And I was angry. I probably still am. But we’re in a position where we don’t have the luxury of holding petty grudges or mourning the loss of something we never really had. We’re in a position of power and those duties and responsibilities to our people have to come first.”
I looked at him with amazement, and not for the first time. “What happened to you?”
He chuckled. “What do you mean?”
“You’re so…mature and stuff.” I reached across the seat to grab his hand. “Your clan is lucky to have you.”
He squeezed back. “So is yours.”
“Yeah, right,” I grunted. “Especially when I’m covered in snot.” He laughed and wrapped his arm over my shoulder. I nestled in against him.
“Well, maybe not looking like you do right now. But you’re powerful, Eviana. They know that, even if they give you a hard time.”
“They don’t do it to you.”
“I’ve had a few more weeks at this. They’re coming around. Don’t worry.” I pulled away from him and sighed.
“We need to find Abhainn.” It was the last thing I felt like doing right now, but getting out of this house was probably for the best.
“Yes, that’s actually why I was looking for you. Adele called.” I jumped in my seat. “Lucian’s agreed to a meeting tomorrow night.”
“Where?”
“Red Lodge, Montana.”
“What?”
“It was the only place they could all agree upon. Neutral territory so to speak.” Why Montana was considered neutral, I had no idea. Maybe because it wasn’t near an ocean?
“So when do we leave?”
“They’re sending a jet for us in the morning.” He climbed out of the car. “So we need to get Abhainn on our side today.”
I opened my door and decided not to leave Brendan’s note behind. “Okay, let me change and I’ll meet you downstairs.” Kain nodded and left me alone. Although I had to laugh when he ran into something again and I heard him swear for the second time today.
****
Kain and I rode in the back of the car taking us to Bennett’s Park where we last saw Abhainn. Daniel wanted to come, but somehow Kain convinced him that his time would be better spent practicing his fighting techniques with Aleksey. Daniel couldn’t argue with that.
“Is Carissa coming again for a visit?” It probably wasn’t the best topic, but I needed to fill the silence.
“I’m not sure.”
“Oh.” I wanted to know more, but figured he’d tell me if he wanted. “You know, I think she can sense when people are lying?”
He glanced in my direction. “Really?”
“Yeah. I didn’t even know that was possible until I met Graham. He can do it and he said there are probably others like that too, although it’s not very common.”
We pulled into the parking lot. “Huh. That might explain some things.” He didn’t elaborate and I didn’t press.
Still early enough in the morning, the park wasn’t too crowded. Two protectors followed us somewhere in the distance, since no one would allow us to do anything by ourselves. Especially after Lucian’s attacks the other night.
We trudged up the path and then through the forest to the pond where Abhainn had been hanging out. The morning sun hid behind the trees to the east and steam rose off the interior of the pond as the air warmed up. I stood there for a second admiring the beauty of this place. With so much death and destruction and heartbreak in my life recently, I needed this moment of serenity.
Unfortunately, it didn’t last very long. Two figures burst through the trees not more than fifty feet from us. There was a male and a female and neither of them wore any clothes. We watched as the man caught up to the woman and grabbed her from behind, eliciting a squeal from her perfect lips. Her long auburn hair flowed effortlessly down to her waist, covering an ample bosom and a flat stomach. The man pulled her tight and kissed her so fiercely and deeply that I felt like we should avert our eyes.
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She complied for a moment and then slapped him hard across the cheek, laughing as she did it. He growled at her but then smiled. This was a game for them. She leapt away and began to run along the water’s edge straight toward us.
Kain and I froze as the female got within a few feet before noticing our presence. With a hiss she jerked back and dropped to the ground on all fours. In an instant her human body shuddered and disappeared as she became a large dog with massive jaws and sharp teeth.
A ratchet.
I stumbled backward in fear, not wanting to face one of these creatures ever again. The ratchet snarled at us, drool falling from her mouth and her gaze locked on Kain. The man running up behind her suddenly stopped and waved his hands in relief.
“Oh. It’s just ye syrenkas.” The ratchet snapped her head around to look at the man, sending droplets of drool and water flying to the side. She backed up toward him, not once dropping her predatory eyes from us.
“Abhainn?” I asked.
He chuckled and had the decency to look ashamed. “Aye. Wasn’t expecting company this mornin’.” He reached forward to pet the ratchet on the head. “’Tis all right, Isabel. They are ma friends.” She growled and he laughed again. “Isabel is quite protective of me these days.” He bent forward so he was at eye level with her. “Really, ‘tis okay. Let’s change.”
Abhainn’s fleshy body shimmered and clothes suddenly, and thankfully, appeared on his form. Isabel wasn’t quite so quick, but once Abhainn reassured her another dozen times, she stood up on her hind legs and transformed into the beautiful women. This time, she created a very small robe to cover her most intimate parts. It was better than nothing.
“Mistress Dumahl and Master Matthew, what a surprise to see ye again so soon,” Abhainn continued. “Please, let’s ‘ave a seat.” He pointed to a few boulders that had been arranged in a circle and provided the perfect spot for a camp fire. “Tell me, what brings ye up to these parts?”
