by Zane Grey
Rose looked in the mirror and smiled and tossed her curly head. She studied the oval face framed in its mass of curls, the steady gray-blue eyes, the soft, wistful, tenderly curved lips. “Yes, I'm pretty,” she said. “And I'm going to buy nice things to wear.”
Suddenly she heard a pattering on the roof.
“Rain! What do you know about that? I've got to stay in. If I spoil that relic of a hat I'll never have the nerve to go ask for a job.”
She prepared for bed, and placing the lamp on the edge of the bureau, she lay down to become absorbed in a paper-backed novel. The mill-clock was striking ten when she finished. There was a dreamy light in her eyes and a glow upon her face.
“How grand to be as beautiful as she was and turn out to be an heiress with blue blood, and a lovely mother, and handsome lovers dying for her!”
Then she flung the novel against the wall.
“It's only a book. It's not true.”
Rose blew out the lamp and went to sleep.
During the night she dreamed that the principal of the High School had called to see her father, and she awoke trembling.
The room was dark as pitch; the rain pattered on the roof; the wind moaned softly under the eaves. A rat somewhere in the wall made a creaking noise. Rose hated to awaken in the middle of the night. She listened for her father's breathing, and failing to hear it, knew he had not yet come home. Often she was left alone until dawn. She tried bravely to go to sleep again but found it impossible; she lay there listening, sensitive to every little sound. The silence was almost more dreadful than the stealthy unknown noises of the night. Vague shapes seemed to hover over her bed. Somehow to-night she dreaded them more. She was sixteen years old, yet there abided with her the terror of the child in the dark.
She cried out in her heart—why was she alone? It was so dark, so silent. Mother! Mother!... She would never—never say her prayers again!
The brazen-tongued mill clock clanged the hour of two, when shuffling uncertain footsteps sounded on the hollow stairs. Rose raised her head to listen. With slow, weary, dragging steps her father came in. Then she lay back on the pillow with a sigh of relief.
CHAPTER X.
In the following week Rose learned that work was not to be had for the asking. Her love of pretty things and a desire to be independent of her father had occupied her mind to the exclusion of a consideration of what might be demanded of a girl seeking a position. She had no knowledge of stenography or bookkeeping; her handwriting was poor. Moreover, references from former employers were required and as she had never been employed, she was asked for recommendations from the principal of her school. These, of course, she could not supply. The stores of the better class had nothing to offer her except to put her name on the waiting-list.
Finally Rose secured a place in a second-rate establishment on Main Street. The work was hard; it necessitated long hours and continual standing on her feet. Rose was not rugged enough to accustom herself to the work all at once, and she was discharged. This disheartened her, but she kept on trying to find other employment.
One day in the shopping district, some one accosted her. She looked up to see a young man, slim, elegant, with a curl of his lips she remembered. He raised his hat.
“How do you do, Mr. Swann,” she answered.
“Rose, are you on the way home?”
“Yes.”
“Let's go down this side street,” he said, throwing away his cigarette. “I've been looking for you.”
They turned the corner. Rose felt strange to be walking alone with him, but she was not embarrassed. He had danced with her once. And she knew his friend Hardy Mackay.
“What're you crying about?” he said.
“I'm not.”
“You have been then. What for?”
“Oh, nothing.”
“Come, tell me.”
“I—I've been disappointed.”
“What about?” He was persistent, and Rose felt that he must be used to having his own way.
“It was about a job I didn't get,” replied Rose, trying to laugh.
“So you're looking for a job. Heard you'd been fired by old Hill. Gail told me. I had her out last night in my new car.”
“I could go back to school. Miss Hill sent for me.... Was Bessy with you and Gail?”
“No. Gail and I were alone. We had a dandy time.... Rose, will you meet me some night and take a ride? It'll be fine and cool.”
“Thank you, Mr. Swann. It's very kind of you to ask me.”
“Well, will you go?” he queried, impatiently.
“No,” she replied, simply.
“Why not?”
“I don't want to.”
“Well, that's plain enough,” he said, changing his tone. “Say, Rose, you're in Clark's store, aren't you?”
“I was. But I lost the place.”
“How's that?”
“I couldn't stand on my feet all day. I fainted. Then he fired me.”
“So you're hunting for another job?” inquired Swann, thoughtfully.
“Yes.”
“Sorry. It's too bad a sweet kid like you has to work. You're not strong, Rose.... Well, I'll turn off at this corner. You won't meet me to-night?”
“No, thanks.”
Swann pulled a gold case from his pocket, and extracting a cigarette, tilted it in his lips as he struck a match. His face wore a careless smile Rose did not like. He was amiable, but he seemed so sure, so satisfied, almost as if he believed she would change her mind.
“Rose, you're turning me down cold, then?”
“Take it any way you like, Mr. Swann,” she replied. “Good day.”
Rose forgot him almost the instant her back was turned. He had only annoyed her. And she had her stepfather to face, with news of her discharge from the store. Her fears were verified; he treated her brutally. Next day Rose went to work in a laundry.
And then, very soon it seemed, her school days, the merry times with the boys, and Bessy—all were far back in the past. She did not meet any one who knew her, nor hear from any one. They had forgotten her. At night, after coming home from the laundry and doing the housework, she was so tired that she was glad to crawl into bed.
But one night a boy brought her a note. It was from Dick Swann. He asked her to go to Mendleson's Hall to see the moving-pictures. She could meet him uptown at the entrance. Rose told the boy to tell Swann she would not come.
This invitation made her thoughtful. If Swann had been ashamed to be seen with her he would not have invited her to go there. Mendleson's was a nice place; all the nice people of Middleville went there. Rose found herself thinking of the lights, the music, the well-dressed crowd, and then the pictures. She loved moving-pictures, especially those with swift horses and cowboys and a girl who could ride. All at once a wave of the old thrilling excitement rushed over her. Almost she regretted having sent back a refusal. But she would not go with Swann. And it was not because she knew what kind of a young man he was—what he wanted. Rose refused from dislike, not scruples.
Then came a Saturday night which seemed a climax of her troubles. She was told not to come back to work until further notice, and that was as bad as being discharged. How could she tell her stepfather? Of late he had been hard with her. She dared not tell him. The money she earned was little enough, but during his idleness it had served to keep them.
Rose had scarcely gone a block when she encountered Dick Swann. He stopped her—turned to walk with her. It was a melancholy gift of Rose's that she could tell when men were even in the slightest under the influence of drink. Swann was not careless now or indifferent. He seemed excited and gay.
“Rose, you're just the girl I'm looking for,” he said. “I really was going to your home. Got that job yet?”
“No,” she replied.
“I've got one for you. It's at the Telephone Exchange. They need an operator. My dad owns the telephone company. I've got a pull. I'll get you the place. You can learn it easy. Nice job�
��short hours—you sit down all the time—good pay. What do you say, Rose?”
“I—I don't know—what to say,” she faltered. “Thanks for thinking of me.”
“I've had you in mind for a month. Rose, you take this job. Take it whether you've any use for me or not. I'm not rotten enough to put this in your way just to make you under obligations to me.”
“I'll think about it. I—I do need a place. My father's out of work. And he's—he's not easy to get along with.”
“I tell you what, Rose. You meet me to-night. We'll take a spin in my car. It'll be fine down the river road. Then we can talk it over. Will you?”
Rose looked at him, and thought how strange it was that she did not like him any better, now when she ought to.
“Why have you tried to—to rush me?” she asked.
“I like you, Rose.”
“But you don't want me to meet you—go with you, when I—I can't feel as you do?”
“Sure, I want you to, Rose. Nobody ever likes me right off. Maybe you will, after you know me. The job is yours. Don't make any date with me for that. I say here's your chance to have a ride, to win a friend. Take it or not. It's up to you. I won't say another word.”
Rose's hungry, lonely heart warmed toward Swann. He seemed like a ray of light in the gloom.
“I'll meet you,” she said.
They arranged the hour and then she went on her way home.
The big car sped through River Park. Rose shivered a little as she peered into the darkness of the grove. Then the car shot under the last electric light, out into the country, with the level road white in the moonlight, and the river gleaming below. There was a steady, even rush of wind. The car hummed and droned and sang. And mingled with the dry scent of dust was the sweet fragrance of new-mown hay. Far off a light twinkled or it might have been a star.
Swann put his arm around Rose. She did not shrink—she did not repulse him—she did not move. Something strange happened in her mind or heart. It was that moment she fell.
And she fell wide-eyed, knowing what she was doing, not in a fervor of excitement, without pleasure or passion, bitterly sure that it was better to be with some one she could not like than to be alone forever. The wrong to herself lay only in the fact that she could not care.
CHAPTER XI.
Toward the end of June, Lane's long vigil of watchfulness from the vantage-point at Colonel Pepper's apartment resulted in a confirmation of his worst fears.
One afternoon and evening of a warm, close day in early summer he lay and crouched on the attic floor above the club-rooms from three o'clock until one the next morning. From time to time he had changed his position to rest. But at the expiration of that protracted period of spying he was so exhausted from the physical strain and mental shock that he was unable to go home. All the rest of the night he lay upon Colonel Pepper's couch, wide awake, consumed by pain and distress. About daylight he fell into a sleep, fitful and full of nightmares, to be awakened around nine o'clock by Pepper. The old gambler evinced considerable alarm until Lane explained how he happened to be there; and then his feeling changed to solicitude.
“Lane, you look awful,” he said.
“If I look the way I feel it's no wonder you're shocked,” returned Lane.
“Ahuh! What'd you see?” queried the other, curiously.
“When?”
“Why, you numskull, while you were peepin' all that time.”
Lane sombrely shook his head. “I couldn't tell—what I saw. I want to forget.... Maybe in twenty-four hours I'll believe it was a nightmare.”
“Humph! Well, I'm here to tell you whatI've seen wasn't any nightmare,” returned Pepper, with his shrewd gaze on Lane. “But we needn't discuss that. If it made an old bum like me sick what might not it do to a sensitive high-minded chap like you.... The question is are you going to bust up that club.”
“I am,” declared Lane, grimly.
“Good! But how—when? What's the sense in lettin' them carry on any longer?”
“I had to fight myself last night to keep from breaking in on them.... But I want to catch this fellow Swann with my sister. She wasn't there.”
“Lane, don't wait for that,” returned Pepper, nervously. “You might never catch him.... And if you did....”
His little plump well-cared-for hand shook as he extended it.
“I don't know what I'll do.... I don't know,” said Lane, darkly, more to himself.
“Lane, this—this worry will knock you out.”
“No matter. All I ask is to stand up—long enough—to do what I want to do.”
“Go home and get some breakfast—and take care of yourself,” replied Pepper, gruffly. “Damn me if I'm not sorry I gave Swann's secret away.”
“Oh no, you're not,” said Lane, quickly. “But I'd have found it out by this time.”
Pepper paced up and down the faded carpet, his hands behind his back, a plodding, burdened figure.
“Have you any—doubts left?” he asked, suddenly.
“Doubts!” echoed Lane, vaguely.
“Yes—doubts. You're like most of these mothers and fathers.... You couldn't believe. You made excuses for the smoke—saying there was no fire.”
“No more doubts, alas!... My God! Isaw ,” burst out Lane.
“All right. Buck up now. It's something to be sure.... You've overdone your strength. You look....”
“Pepper, do me a favor,” interposed Lane, as he made for the door. “Get me an axe and leave it here in your rooms. In case I want to break in on those fellows some time—quick—I'll have it ready.”
“Sure, I'll get you anything. And I want to be around when you butt in on them.”
“That's up to you. Good-bye now. I'll run in to-morrow if I'm up to it.”
Lane went home, his mind in a tumult. His mother had just discovered that he had not slept in his bed, and was greatly relieved to see him. Breakfast was waiting, and after partaking of it Lane felt somewhat better. His mother appeared more than usually sombre. Worry was killing her.
“Lorna did not sleep at home last night,” she said, presently, as if reluctantly forced to impart this information.
“Where was she?” he queried, blankly.
“She said she would stay with a friend.”
“What friend?”
“Some girl. Oh, it's all right I suppose. She's stayed away before with girl friends.... But what worried me....”
“Well,” queried Lane, as she paused.
“Lorna was angry again last night. And she told me if you didn't stop your nagging she'd go away from home and stay. Said she could afford to pay her board.”
“She told me that, too,” replied Lane, slowly. “And—I'm afraid she meant it.”
“Leave her alone, Daren.”
“Poor mother! I'm afraid I'm a—a worry to you as well as Lorna,” he said, gently, with a hand going to her worn cheek. She said nothing, although her glance rested upon him with sad affection.
Lane clambered wearily up to his little room. It had always been a refuge. He leaned a moment against the wall, and felt in his extremity like an animal in a trap. A thousand pricking, rushing sensations seemed to be on the way to his head. That confusion, that sensation as if his blood vessels would burst, yielded to his will. He sat down on his bed. Only the physical pains and weariness, and the heartsickness abided with him. These had been nothing to daunt his spirit. But to-day was different. The dark, vivid, terrible picture in his mind unrolled like a page. Yesterday was different. To-day he seemed a changed man, confronted by imperious demands. Time was driving onward fast.
As if impelled by a dark and sinister force, he slowly leaned down to pull his bag from under the bed. He opened it, and drew out his Colt's automatic gun. Though the June day was warm this big worn metal weapon had a cold touch. He did not feel that he wanted to handle it, but he did. It seemed heavy, a thing of subtle, latent energy, with singular fascination for him. It brought up a dark flowing tide of memor
y. Lane shut his eyes, and saw the tide flow by with its conflict and horror. The feel of his gun, and the recall of what it had meant to him in terrible hours, drove away a wavering of will, and a still voice that tried to pierce his consciousness. It fixed his sinister intention. He threw the gun on the bed, and rising began to pace the floor.
“If I told what I saw—no jury on earth would convict me,” he soliloquized. “But I'll kill him—and keep my mouth shut.”
