by Jillian Hart
“I’ll be right back.”
“Okay.” Her gaze caught his, for one brief moment, and he thought he saw the flicker of something in her eyes, but before he could be sure it was gone. He hoped for another glimpse of it as he climbed the stairs, keeping her in his sight for as long as he could. She looked oddly sad, but there was not one sign that she felt anything more for him. They were allies helping Toby. That was all it could ever be between them. Now, they were not even friends.
“Marshal.” Mildred swept away from the tree standing in the corner of the lobby, freshly cut and scenting the air. “There you are. Will you be staying with us for Christmas? So many of our residents are leaving to be with family. I’m trying to get an estimate for the kitchen staff.”
“I haven’t gotten around to telling you, since I’m paid until the end of the month.” He studied the tree, green boughs uplifted, waiting to be decorated. Looked like he’d have to get one of those, too. It wouldn’t be a proper Christmas in his house without one. “I bought a house. I’m moving in tomorrow.”
“How wonderful for you!” Mildred beamed her approval. “I’m so happy for you, Elijah.”
“Thanks. I plan to live in Angel Falls for a long time.” Life was all about timing. Everything happened in God’s time, and he felt that the Lord was leading him to a purpose, to a life that would no longer be lived alone.
When he opened the back door to grab a pail of coal from the lean-to, the faint melody of voices echoed through the alley. The storm snatched most of the words, but he recognized a Christmas carol and stopped to listen to a few bars before heading back inside.
“You go grab dear Christina and that sweet little boy and I’ll take care of the coal,” Mildred ordered as soon as he stepped foot into the lobby. “Go on, quick. Bless Reverend Hadly and his choir. They know how to spread Christmas cheer.”
“Is that music I hear?” Christina asked, appearing on the landing, buttoning her coat. Toby followed in her wake, wiping chocolate crumbs from his face on his ragged sleeve. “I love carolers. For years I belonged to our church choir and on snowy evenings before Christmas we would sing our way through town.”
“Hurry!” Mildred called, heading for the front door. “You don’t want to miss this!”
“Then we better not.” Elijah wanted to take Christina by the hand and lead her to the door, the wish as natural as breathing. “Let’s go listen together.”
“I’d like that.” She smiled up at him, making his heart stop. He didn’t know how he made it to the door, which he held open for her and the boy. He followed them into the brunt of the winter storm and stood at Christina’s side. She seemed enraptured by the half circle of two-dozen singers, men and women, in four-part harmony.
“Come all ye faithful,” the voices rang out. “Joyful and triumphant.”
“Oh, they’re lovely.” She didn’t seem to realize she was the lovely one, giving Toby her mittens because he had none to warm his hands. She stood beside him like a mother, a hand on his shoulder, perhaps so he couldn’t dart away. “Do you know this song, Toby?”
“Uh-huh.” The boy nodded.
“Come and behold Him,” Christina sang in a soprano nearly as sweet as she was. “Born the king of angels.”
“Oh, come let us adore Him,” Elijah joined in. “Oh, come let us adore Him—”
“Christ the Lord,” Christina chimed, so dear, it wasn’t his fault that his hands slipped around her cold fingers and warmed them. It was the only thing he could do for her, such a small thing when his devotion to her was great.
One perfect moment, Elijah thought, standing beside her, for this one moment they were together.
Chapter Eight
“Toby?” Christina looked up from her morning work sweeping dust and evergreen needles into the dustpan. “What are you doing?”
“I’m helpin’.” The boy took charge of her broom and gave it a sweep. Dust flew upward, scattering across the hallway. Head down, Toby swept in fast, practiced strokes.
“Hey, that’s my job.” She left the dustpan where it lay to rescue the broom. “You are supposed to be getting ready to go with Elijah.”
“I am ready.” Face scrubbed, teeth brushed, hair combed, he looked less like the runaway and more a little schoolboy. “Can the marshal really find a good home for me?”
“He said he could. I know Elijah.” It felt as if she’d always known him. “He’s a man of his word.”
“I want to be like him when I get big.” He held on tight, refusing to let her wrench the broom from his grip. “He’s tall and he’s good.”
“He’s very good.” She ignored the twist of emotion, the one threatening to keep her heart from beating. Images from last night flashed into her mind, of Elijah towering beside her in the dark, of his mellow baritone rumbling in song, of his hands warming hers.
It was gratitude and a lot of respect, she felt, that was all. Surely it was nothing more.
“There, I done it.” Toby grinned, proud of himself, at the end of the dim hallway. “And I gotta whole lotta dirt, too.”
“Guess you need the dustpan.” She scooped it up, careful not to let the dust inside whirl away. “Thanks for helping, although Mildred hired me to do it.”
“You got a job here?”
“For now.” She knelt to set the dustpan on the floor. “I’m filling in for the downstairs maid until she gets back from her Christmas trip.”
“Did she go to see her ma and pa?” Toby asked.
“Probably.” She took the broom from him and brushed the debris into the pan with a few efficient sweeps. “I hear footsteps on the stairs. It’s probably Elijah come with good news.”
“I dunno, Miss Christina. I’m not gonna hope until I see good things for sure.”
It wasn’t the marshal who stepped into the spill of morning light. Tom Rutger took one look at the child and scowled. “What’s that runt doin’ here?”
“Toby, would you please go in my room and shut the door?” She left the dustpan and stood. “Promise me you’ll wait for me there.”
“Yes, ma’am.” A wary look pinched his face as he darted around Tom. The door closed with a click.
“What are you doing with him?” Tom’s tone darkened. “You know what he did to me.”
“He’s a child with nowhere to go. I had hoped you would have compassion for him.” She opened the small closet door beneath the staircase and put the broom away. “In fact, I had hoped you would be a lot of things. I’m glad you came by, because we need to talk.”
“I didn’t come to talk. We need to get some things straight.” Muscles strained along his jaw. “I chose you cuz you needed a place to live. Figured you’d be the grateful sort to have a man to provide for you.”
“I am grateful.” Dreams of her new life had sustained her on the nights hidden away in an alley or a stall trying to sleep. Daydreams of the happiness she would make with Tom, the man who’d offered her a new life, had brightened her days on the journey west. Tom had given her hope. “I had dreamed you would be the man I needed, but you’re not, Tom. I could never marry a man who takes a whip to a little boy.”
“But he was stealin’ from me.” Fury drew him up like a bear.
“I know, but that doesn’t make trying to whip him right.” She wished things could be different for them. If only Tom had been honest with her—and himself. “If you were the man I’d prayed for, then you would know why it wasn’t right.”
“A lot of things ain’t right. You aren’t at all the nice lady I thought you’d be. We need to straighten that out.” Cords strained in his neck. “A wife ought to show the proper respect to her husband. You need to apologize to me, and that will help make things right.”
“I can’t, Tom. I can’t marry you.” She could see him for who he was. She’d seen beneath the self-deprecating mask he wore to the troubled man beneath. She felt sorry he was so lost. “You have no notion how much I had wanted this to work.”
“What are you ta
lking about?” His forehead furrowed. “You need a roof over your head and I need help with the farm. We made a fair deal.”
“It would be, but I can’t marry you. I’m so sorry.” Kindly, she laid her hand on his forearm. “I don’t think we’re compatible. Do you?”
“No. You’re strong-minded. You didn’t say a thing about that in your letter.” He shook off her touch. “I’ve learned to handle strong-minded creatures, and I need help with the pigs. That’s why I need you. You’ll marry me, or return what I spent on you.”
The costs of her room and the train ticket. She nodded. “Of course, I will. I’ll pay you as soon as—”
“Not good enough.” He dug into his coat pocket and hauled out her letter. “Remember I asked you to put it in writing? You agreed to marry me or pay on demand what I loaned you for the trip here. It ought to be binding, as I learned from the last lady who came here on my dime and decided I wasn’t good enough for her.”
“But I don’t have the money right now.”
“You have until tomorrow at noon or we wed. It’s as simple as that.”
She watched him storm up the steps and disappear from sight. Tom’s ultimatum rang in her head. He wouldn’t let her out of their marriage bargain. He’d never intended to try to love her. There had never been the chance to belong to someone and to be loved. All Tom had ever intended to give her was shelter and meals. Was that her future? Bleakness hit with the bone-breaking force of a blacksmith’s hammer.
“Christina?” The door creaked open and Toby stared at her through the crack, his eyes filled with tears. “Do you really have to marry that man?”
“I don’t know. I think so.” She leaned against the wall since her knees had gone weak. “The train ticket and my hotel add up to a lot of money. It would take a long time for me to earn it all.”
“I’m real sorry.” He pulled the door open wide enough to slip through, not making a sound. He clutched his coat in his hand. “It’s my fault, cuz I—”
“You are not to blame.” No way did she want him to think so, even for an instant. “A grown man should never take a whip to a child. End of story. I’m sorry he frightened you, but look at it this way. I owe you greatly because now I know the man Tom truly is.”
Toby gripped his coat pocket firmly, as if holding on to something inside. Misery and guilt were written across his freckled face. “That’s not it, I—”
Footsteps knelled on the stairs. A man’s voice called down the stairwell, “Toby, are you ready to go to your new home?”
“Elijah.” She didn’t want to accept the wash of peace that flowed through her when he strode into sight. It wouldn’t be right to acknowledge the feelings that had been building for so long, feelings which were really more than respect and admiration, a great deal more than friendship. “How did your morning go?”
“Better than expected.” A full smile carved across his granite features. Snow clung to dark strands of his thick hair, as if he were touched by grace, and standing in his black coat and denims, he was her dream.
Just once, she wanted to know what it would be like to experience a dream, a real one, one that would never fade or change or show a different side. She felt her smile light her up. “Better than expected? Does that mean—”
“That’s right. Heard back from my friend at the governor’s office. They intend to arrange an inspection of the orphanage Toby came from, but for now, I have the solution I’d hoped for.”
“Just in time for Christmas.” If she couldn’t have her Christmas wish come true, then she gave thanks to the Lord that her wish for Toby had. “Would you mind if I tagged along?”
“It wouldn’t be the same without you.” Kindheartedness radiated from him. He flashed his amazing smile at her. “After all, we found him in the street together.”
“And it feels right to see him to the end together.” She matched Elijah’s smile. She wasn’t going to think about her future, that lurking darkness. She ducked past him, ignoring the sweet pull of his presence on her soul. “Let me grab my coat.”
“We’ll wait.” The warmth in Elijah’s tone faded. Only then did she realize Toby hadn’t said a word. He stood in the hallway staring at the string holding his shoe together.
Elijah’s gaze snared hers. He’d noticed it, too. He held her coat for her, aiding her with the sleeve. His knuckles grazed the back of her neck and she shivered from his nearness. A harmless crush, she told herself, that was all. She couldn’t wish for more.
“What’s wrong, Toby?” Elijah moved away from her and knelt down, eye level with the boy. “Are you afraid I’m going to trick you and take you back to the orphanage?”
Toby shook his head once, his sandy hair tumbling forward to hide his eyes.
“Are you afraid your new pa won’t like you?”
“Sorta, but that’s not it.” Toby sighed, downcast.
“Are you worried you won’t like the new home I found for you? Tell me what’s troubling you. I’ll do my best to help.”
“I don’t deserve a new home.” Toby choked down a sob. “Not at all.”
“Of course, you do. The plans are already made. I got the temporary approval from Helena. You have to come with me.” The kid would be all right once he saw where he was going. He buttoned the boy’s coat. “Let’s go.”
“I’m very curious to see the place Elijah found for you.” Christina tugged on her knit cap, bundled up for the storm. “I have a feeling it’s going to be great.”
“Now let’s not get his expectations up too high.” Elijah found himself laughing, taking the boy by the hand. “I’d hate for him to be disappointed.”
“Impossible.” Her certainty touched him deeply. She swept up the stairs, leading the way into the light. The Christmas tree blazed in the lobby and the glass angel on top seemed to watch over them with her hands clasped and golden gowns flowing as they pushed through the doors and into the storm.
Nothing felt more right than walking with Christina at his side. The snow fell too hard to speak, so they walked in silence. He kept Toby’s hand firmly in his and blocked the brunt of the wind from Christina. He made sure she didn’t hit a patch of ice when she hopped off the boardwalk and into the street. He pretended for one brief second that she could be rightly his.
Love filled his heart with the sweetest longing. Love lit his soul with the strongest devotion. If he could have any wish come true this Christmas, it would be to make Christina his. To slip a ring on her finger, to make her his wife and offer her everything he had. His home, his heart, his life. He would never be whole without her.
Timing, he reminded himself, as he pulled the keys from his pocket and unlocked the front door to his new house. Timing was everything. He held his heart in check as he opened the door.
“I love your house,” Christina said. Her footsteps echoed in the empty parlor, her skirts rustled as she spun around taking in the details—gray stone fireplace, big windows with window seats and polished wood floors that gleamed. “I can just picture it. Furniture, curtains, a fire blazing in the hearth. It will be a wonderful place for you and Toby.”
“I’m gonna live here?” The boy’s jaw dropped. “You’re gonna be my pa?”
“If that’s all right with you.” Elijah went down on one knee to better gauge the kid’s reaction. “What do you think?”
“I think you’d make a mighty good pa.” Tears stood in green eyes. “But maybe you don’t want a boy like me.”
“Maybe I do.” There were those fatherly feelings again, filling him up. Looked like his life was about to change. Now he had a family when his life had been empty for so long. “Do you know the first thing we’re going to do? Head over to Lawson’s and get you everything you need. New shoes, new clothes.” Toby swiped his tears away with a frayed sleeve.
“And a tree, too,” Elijah added, climbing to his feet. “We’ll need presents to go under it. What do you say, Christina? We could use a woman’s help with our shopping. We’re men. We don’t
know where to start.”
“That’s what the shopkeeper is for.” She knew what he was asking her, and she couldn’t do it. It would hurt too much. Seeing Elijah accept Toby broke the last of her control over her heart.
This was a daydream, a moment out of time. She’d been a fool to think she could have more. “I promised Mildred I would help her this afternoon. She’s shorthanded, since two of her maids are on holiday, so no shopping trip for me. Toby, I’m thankful you have a home.”
“Me, too. I can’t believe it.” The child didn’t meet her gaze. His face flamed red again. “Maybe I’m just dreamin’.”
“Not a chance.” She smoothed flyaway strands of his hair. “You’ll see. Some good things last. It’s okay to believe.”
Toby swallowed hard, nodding once. She turned away, too tangled up with emotion to say more. This was goodbye. Their paths—hers, Toby’s and Elijah’s—would take different turns.
From this point on maybe she’d spot them in church and smile, or see them on the boardwalk and wave. But her life was no longer hers. She owed Tom a debt she couldn’t pay. The only honorable way out was to marry him. “Goodbye, Elijah.”
“It’s been a pleasure knowing you.” Something great and luminous flickered in his blue gaze. Something that looked like love.
“No, the pleasure has been all mine.” It took all her will to force her feet to take her from him. Every step she took felt like a blow, one wound on top of another. Icy snow needled her face as she tripped down the front steps and into the storm. For all the years to come, she would never forget Elijah’s kindness or his goodness. She would always keep a piece of their time together alive and safe in her heart.
Chapter Nine
“How do those feel?” Arthur Lawson asked, kneeling in front of a silent Toby.
The boy nodded once, refusing to make eye contact with the shopkeeper.
“They look pretty good.” Arthur pressed his thumb against the leather, feeling for Toby’s big toe. “Got some growing room in there, but not too much. Why don’t you take a walk around the store and test them out.”
