by DC Renee
“You don’t, but I’m asking you to trust me, to believe in me.”
“I don’t know,” I said quietly because I honestly didn’t. I wanted to believe him, I really did, but actions spoke louder than words, and even though his words had melted the little ice crystals that had formed around my heart from when he dropped me so suddenly, it wasn’t yet one hundred percent whole.
“I don’t know isn’t no,” he responded with a hopeful smile. “I could work with that. We can go slow. I’m willing to go at whatever pace you want. I’ll earn back your trust, Lise. I promise. But at least give me that chance.”
Afraid of the words that would escape my mouth, I didn’t speak, but I found myself nodding. The smile I got from him in return was something extraordinary, and I couldn’t help but return the smile. “Slow, Nolan,” I told him.
“Slow,” he said with a nod before he pulled me into his arms and captured my lips with his. We stayed that way with our mouths fused for a long time until he finally pulled away and rested his forehead against mine. “I don’t want to go. I just got you back, but if I stay, I don’t know that I can go slow. So, I think I should leave, but please, Lise, tell me I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“You’ll see me tomorrow,” I told him automatically.
“Thank God,” he whispered. After giving me another quick kiss, he started to back up.
“What are you doing?” I asked, laughing.
“I’m not turning my back on you again,” he said with a wink. “Plus, this way I get to see your face for a little longer.”
“Go, silly man.” I chuckled as he fumbled with the door behind him. When he finally managed to open it with his hands behind his back, I laughed. And then he was gone, and I realized what had just happened.
The man I loved told me he loved me, and I didn’t say it back. I told myself I would, but I’d let him sweat it out a little first. As I said, petty … and proud of it too.
WHOSE BRIGHT IDEA was it to go slow? Oh, that’s right. Mine. Silly me.
It would have been so easy to pick up where we left off before Nolan shattered my heart, but I was scared. I needed the reassurance I wouldn’t get hurt again in the future. I mean, I knew that wasn’t a guarantee, but at least not because Nolan just up and left when things got rough. Yet I found myself falling back into the laid-back, easy relationship we had. Luckily, Nolan was smart enough to realize that deep down, I still needed time.
So he would pull back even when I pushed forward.
He was keeping his word, which was definitely earning him brownie points, especially with Stephanie.
She hadn’t been too keen on forgiving him for hurting me even after I replayed the conversation for her. Nolan must have known that because he ended up reaching out to her directly. I knew they had a heart-to-heart over the phone, and Stephanie tried to relay the conversation to me, but it was different getting her truncated version. The gist was that he basically told her everything he had told me.
“Thank you for making peace with Stephanie,” I’d told him shortly after.
“She matters to you, and you matter to me. Therefore, she matters to me too. I wanted to make sure we were okay so it wouldn’t put you in an awkward place.” I melted a little more with that statement.
I nodded because words wouldn’t do justice. “You told her everything,” I stated. Not a question. He chuckled in response, which caused me to smile. “What?” I asked.
“You think I don’t know you tell each other everything?” he asked, but he didn’t sound upset. The truth was that I had told her, but I glossed over it. I needed her to understand where he was coming from, but his past was his past. He had given her the full version. “It’s okay,” he added as he took in my embarrassed blush at essentially being caught. “I get it. You girls share things us guys wouldn’t. You need that person to hear you out. She’s it for you. And I’m okay with it. Besides, my life is your life, so my details are yours to share too,” he added almost nonchalantly. Those words right there were worth the second chance I took on him. Hell, they probably earned him a third and a fourth if he ever needed them.
Needless to say, he got the “okay” from her. And he even came over for dinner the next night. He cooked us dinner, which I think was the real reason Stephanie forgave him on my behalf.
All of this was great, but we still hadn’t slept together. We’d gotten almost there several times in the three weeks since we’d gotten back together, but we never crossed that line.
“I don’t want you to think it’s because I missed your body that I came back. Not that I don’t. But it was you I missed. The whole package. And I know you’re still hesitant. I can sense it. When I know you’re back with me one hundred percent, that’s when you’re mine, body and soul.”
It would have been sweet if I didn’t have the girl equivalent of blue balls. Which was why this whole going slow thing was starting to become a pain in my butt.
It was extra inconvenient now because Nolan had asked me if I would meet his dad. “I want the most important person in my life to meet the other most important person in my life,” he’d told me. It was incredibly sweet, and even though I was wary, I couldn’t help but say yes. But my sexual frustration—something, I might add, was literally never a problem before I met Nolan—was making me nervous. We were going to have dinner at Nolan’s childhood home, and I’d teased him mercilessly about all the girls he’d brought back to his boyhood bedroom. Too bad that darn teasing had me wanting to be the last girl he brought there, the one who would wipe away all the other girls’ memories. Okay, so that wasn’t totally the sexual frustration talking. It was definitely a healthy dose of jealousy. But still … I couldn’t very well be thinking about boning my boyfriend in front of his dad.
Somehow, though, I was able to push all thoughts aside when we pulled up to Nolan’s childhood home.
“Dad,” Nolan said reverently when his dad opened the door. They embraced quickly, but the love they had for each other was apparent. Nolan stepped back. “Dad, this is Annalise. Lise, this is my dad.”
“It’s so nice to meet you, Mr. Corrington,” I said as I held out my hand.
“Please, call me Neal,” he said as he bypassed my hand and pulled me into an embrace. I was a bit shocked, but at the same time, it felt nice for him to welcome me so openly.
We headed inside where Nolan gave me a quick tour of the house before we joined his dad in the dining room. The house was smaller than I expected. I mean, it was still huge, what some would call a mansion, but it wasn’t over the top. It did, however, just showcase how much money Nolan grew up with. The crème de la crème was his bedroom. It looked like it hadn’t been touched since he was in high school. Trophies, sports memorabilia, and pictures with friends adorned his room. No pictures of girls, I noted with a satisfied smile.
We made it back to the dining room where Lily, the family’s live-in maid, served us.
“She’s not just the housekeeper,” he explained after he’d introduced us. “She helped raise me. Like a mother.” He looked over at her, and I felt the adoration of the little boy he’d been, looking up to her. I’d learned over dinner that her husband died when her children were just babies. She worked part-time for the family while the kids were growing up, but when Nolan’s mom passed, they were already grown and out of the house, so she moved in. She’d been there ever since.
I also learned about Nolan as a child through the stories Neal and Lily told, and in turn, they learned all about me.
His father was much more down-to-earth than I had expected. Nolan had only ever said good things about him, but for some reason, I had pictured him as a stern man with a bit of a barrier as a result of the grief from losing his wife. He was none of those things.
I offered to help Lily clean up after dinner, but she shooed me away. “Nonsense, child. You’re a guest … for today,” she added with a wink. “But mind you, next time you’re here, we’ll call you family. I’ll let you help then.” I laug
hed, and she walked away with a smile on her face.
When Nolan excused himself to use the restroom and Lily was in the kitchen, I was left facing Neal. As comfortable as I had been with him, it was still intimidating being left alone with your boyfriend’s dad. I might have gulped loudly.
“Nolan’s never brought home a girl,” he said, breaking the tension. “Hell, I don’t think he’s ever seen the same girl twice. You’re special, Annalise. And I can see why. You’re good for my boy …” He trailed off as if he were thinking about something important, and he wasn’t sure how to approach the subject. “As much as I love Nolan, and as much as I want you for him because I’ve never seen him smile the way he does around you, I have to ask. Do you know what you’re getting into with him? Because if you don’t, I don’t want you running away when it’s too late. It’s as plain as day that my boy’s in love with you. If you walk away now, he’ll be crushed. But if you walk away later, he’ll be ruined. So make sure you know what you’re doing, Annalise. I know from experience just what losing the love of your life can do to you.”
I would have balked at his words if I didn’t know they came from a place of love and grief. Instead of bristling at his warning, I looked him in the eye, conveying the sincerity of my words.
“I know everything I need to know about your son, Neal, and I love him. I love him with my whole heart. No, that’s not right. I’m in love with him. And I’m not leaving him. Not now, not ever.”
Neal didn’t respond for a good minute, but then he nodded. “I hope you’re right, Annalise. I really hope you’re right. But no more sour talk. Let’s talk dessert. Do you like chocolate because if you don’t, you might have to lie and tell Lily you do. She made her special double chocolate fudge cake for dessert,” he said as a way to change the pace of the conversation.
I couldn’t help but laugh as I appreciated the way he changed the subject. “I love chocolate.”
“Good,” he said right as Nolan came back. “I think we can keep her, son. She said she likes chocolate.”
“Oh, phew,” Nolan responded with a laugh. “I was actually dreading that part,” he teased. “I mean, I like you a lot, Lise, but if you said no to chocolate, I think we’d have to part ways.”
“Well, then chocolate saves the day,” I said right as Lily came back out with what looked like the most decadent chocolate cake I’d ever seen. And it tasted like heaven too.
And luckily for me, the rest of the night was as easy as liking chocolate cake.
“SO YOU LOVE me, huh?” Nolan asked as soon as we walked through his front door.
He had spent the entire ride home telling me how much it was clear his father loved me and how I’d charmed Lily. As sweet as she seemed, apparently Lily wasn’t all that easy to charm. She was fiercely protective of Nolan, but she had pulled him aside and told him I was a keeper. I smiled pretty wide when he admitted that.
In turn, I told him how wonderful his dad and Lily were, and that he was lucky to have them in his life. He hadn’t said one word about the little conversation I’d had with his father. There had been no indication he’d heard a word of it.
So I was absolutely shocked when I heard those words leave his mouth. In fact, it hadn’t even registered where they’d come from. I must have looked like a fish out of water with my mouth gaping open as I stared at him.
“In love with me, really?” he said with a smug smirk.
“You heard that, huh?” I asked as his words sank in.
“Yep, and it took everything in me not to storm in there, drag you away like a caveman, make you say it to my face over and over while I buried myself inside you, claiming you as mine forever.” Panties meet wetness.
“I … uh …” I stuttered.
He crossed the room, taking my head in his hands to force me to look into his eyes as he spoke. “I love you, Lise. I’m so in love with you that it hurts. If my actions these past few weeks haven’t proven that to you, then I’m doing something wrong, and I’ll need your help figuring out the right way to go about showing you that I’m in it for the long haul. I didn’t have you meet my dad just for kicks. It means something to me that you met him and that you met Lily. I’m not running this time. Don’t be scared. Don’t be scared of me or your feelings for me. I promise to guard them and guard your heart. I broke it once, and that was one time too many. I won’t be fool enough to do it again.”
He opened his mouth to continue, probably to say something else to convince me he was man enough to love, but I cut him off. “I love you,” I said. His mouth snapped shut immediately as he looked at me, his eyes boring into mine as if wishing the words to come out again. I obliged. “I love you, Nolan. I’m in love with you.” And then his lips crashed into mine. His kiss was frantic as though he were afraid I’d disappear if he let go. Or maybe afraid my love would disappear. Without breaking the kiss, he moved his hands from my face and down my body until he was able to tug me up to wrap my legs around his waist.
He turned and walked toward the bedroom, his lips not leaving mine until he set me on the bed.
“God, Lise. I’ve waited for what feels like forever to hear you say those words. I love you. And now I’m going to show you how much I love you in the best way I know how.”
He undressed while I watched from the bed. I got my own private strip tease as each article of clothing came off quickly but with purpose until he was naked before me, his cock pointing straight at me as if saying “your turn.”
Nolan’s other head must have gotten the memo. “Undress for me,” he whispered, but the soft tone didn’t diminish his command.
I stood and began to slowly peel my dress over my body, leaving just my bra and panties. “Everything,” he said. I kicked off my shoes before unhooking my bra and then slowly lowering my underwear. I stood back up, letting Nolan’s eyes trail up and down my body.
“God, I missed you,” he told me and then closed the gap. But he didn’t kiss me even though his mouth was just a hair’s breadth away from mine. Instead, he breathed me in, and it was somehow more erotic than anything I’d experienced before. “I want to tease you, tempt you, make you dripping wet for me, but I can’t right now. I need you too much. I need to be inside you right now. I promise I’ll take my time with you next time.”
“Yes,” I said on a moan, my body instinctively leaning closer to his.
“Lie down on the bed, Lise. Open your legs. Open for me,” he urged, and I did.
He moved to the bedside table, presumably to get a condom, but my words halted him. “No. I’m clean, and I trust you. I love you, and you love me. Nothing between us.”
“Are you sure?” he asked, and I nodded. “I’m clean,” he told me as if I needed the reassurance.
“Nolan, please,” I begged, needing him.
He climbed on top of me, his cock moving against my slippery folds, and I couldn’t help but arch my back in pleasure.
“Eyes on me, Lise. I want you to watch me as I claim you as mine. I want to see you lose control. I want to see your face as you scream my name.” I could have come just from his words. And then he pushed inside, slowly sinking in deep, causing his name to escape my lips. And then he moved in and out, his eyes never leaving mine, sweetly torturing me with a slow but steady pace, whispering words of love as he held himself propped up with his strong arms on either side of me. I grabbed them as if they were my anchor to this world, keeping me grounded as he moved inside me.
I felt the tension building. “Please,” I said. Nolan must have felt the pulsing start because he moved a little faster until I was screaming his name. My orgasm hit me with a force I’d never felt before, then he followed suit.
He held himself up even after we were both spent, his eyes still staring into mine.
“Did you feel that?” he asked. “That’s what it feels like to love someone, to be in love with someone. That, Lise, is what we have to look forward to forever.”
I nodded in agreement. “I love you, Nolan.”
“Say it again.”
“I love you,” I repeated, and then I felt him grow hard while he was still inside me. “Really?” I asked, somewhat shocked.
“That’s all you,” he said with a smirk. “Ready for round two?” he asked. Rather than speaking, I pushed my hips up so he could go a little deeper inside me. “Good answer,” he said and then proceeded to show me over and over just how much he loved me. And he loved me a lot.
NOLAN HADN’T ASKED me, hadn’t even hinted at it, which made me actually want it more. It had been a month since I’d met his dad and Lily—his family. It was a huge step in our relationship, at least on his end. He had basically told me with that meet that he believed in the staying power of us. So shouldn’t I have had the same feelings? You know, wanting him to meet my family?
The truth was, I did, but I was beyond nervous. When I lived at home, guys who wanted to date me had to pick me up, which meant my parents got to meet them by default. That wasn’t the case when I went off to college, but still, if my mom asked if I was dating anyone, I told her the truth and even gave details.
Yet with Nolan, I hadn’t shared much. I think maybe it was because I knew he was different. My parents weren’t intimidating in any sense of the word. In fact, they were quite the opposite—very laid-back and open-minded. I hadn’t really cared if they met or had heard of the guys I dated before, but I found myself caring now. Why? It was simple. If they hadn’t liked a guy before, then no harm, no foul. I’d ditch him because I wasn’t ever that emotionally invested in someone—not that they ever disliked anyone. I think they trusted my judgment. But if for some reason, they didn’t like Nolan, I’d be crushed. I wouldn’t be able to give him up, and then I’d be stuck choosing between him and them. I’d choose them because as much as I loved Nolan, I could always find another man, but I couldn’t find another set of parents.
But I really, really, really didn’t want to give Nolan up. I’d be devasted beyond anything I could ever imagine.
