“You’ve been to Blackpool?”
She nodded. “Mikey took me and the boys.”
His face hardened. “Mikey,” he spat.
“Please don’t get pissed off Jackson, I’ve had a really good day.”
“I don’t want to spoil your good mood but I’ve been going through torture for the past few hours. After what happened to you with the Slatterys I was thinking the worst. I was just about ready to call the police and report you missing, that’s how bad it was.”
“You actually missed me?”
“Yes. Why do you sound confused? You’re my wife for Christ’s sake and I love you.”
“I felt like I was getting in the way here.”
“You’re not getting in the way, this is your home.”
She shook her head. “No it’s not. We might as well face up to the fact. I feel really awkward here, like I’m intruding and Cara doesn’t want me here.”
“You’ve been back less than a day, you need to give it time and disappearing for hours isn’t going to build any bridges with Cara. You can’t solve your problems by running away from them.”
“I saw you today, at the hospital with Cindy.”
It was the last thing he was expecting and it shocked him into momentary silence. “You did?” he eventually croaked.
“I shouldn’t have gone, I know but I couldn’t help it. You looked so happy together.”
“Only because of the baby. I’m happier when I’m with you.”
She thought he genuinely couldn’t see how this was going to play out and she didn’t know who she felt sorrier for - herself or him.
“So that’s why you did a runner today?” he said more gently.
She nodded. “I couldn’t face coming back here. I had to get away.”
“And that’s my fault,” he sighed. “I’m so sorry for what I’ve done to you. But you need to know that it’s you I love, not Cindy. You’re my wife and I want to be with you. Now, seeing how you’re home safely, thank God, why don’t I cook you some tea then you can have a nice relaxing bath?”
“Where’s Cara?”
“At my parents’ house. Mum thought it better she took her out of the way because I was getting so wound up. I think it’s best if she stays there tonight, to give us some time alone together. We’ve tried to take everything too fast.”
“Maybe,” she said, ashamed that she was relieved she wouldn’t have to face her daughter for the rest of the day but she was in such a good mood and Cara’s loathing of her would only destroy that.
“Why don’t you put your feet up while I cook?” he said, cupping her face in his hands.
When he pressed his lips to hers she actually kissed him back. Delighted, he wrapped her tightly in his arms and kissed her harder, encouraging her mouth open wider, revelling in the feel of her arms sliding around his neck. Ever since he’d first seen Jules all those years ago in a pub, looking sexy and dangerous in her black leather he’d found her unbelievably attractive and he still did. That had never changed, not even with the coma.
When he became more passionate Jules pulled away. “I’m really hungry,” she said.
With that she went into the lounge, leaving him standing in the hallway, breathless, hair dishevelled and with a hard on.
Jules fell onto the couch, annoyed by how tired she was but Mikey had given her hope for the future, speaking positively and, as usual, he’d managed to talk some sense into her and she’d promised to stop expecting everything all at once. Plus he’d promised to train her so she could get her fighting skills back. There was no better teacher than an undefeated boxing champion. Her experience in the ring today had taught her that she hadn’t lost her skills, they just needing some honing, that was all and she’d certainly proved to be stronger than she’d expected. She was going to need that strength if she was going to bring down Slattery. Tomorrow she would make a couple of calls and begin the business of tracking the bastard down.
CHAPTER 28
When Ashley turned up on Rachel’s doorstep again she initially refused to open the door to him, convinced he’d come back to re-arrest Ryan and it took him five minutes of explaining the real reason for his visit through the letterbox before she agreed to open up.
“I take it he’s here?” he said when she’d finally opened the door.
She nodded, black eyes flashing before leading him through to the study at the rear of the house, where Ryan was ensconced with his laptop.
“Ashley,” he said coldly when he walked in with Rachel.
“Ryan. Don’t worry, I’m not here to arrest you.”
“You wouldn’t have got through the door if you had been,” retorted Rachel.
“I’ve come to let you know that we’ve gone over the CCTV footage of your garage and yes, someone does indeed go in and they come out holding a small object that could well be the hammer. We can’t tell that it definitely is but it’s thrown out all credibility for the evidence against you. So much so that we’ve decided not to pursue it as your solicitor would pull it apart.”
“I’m glad you’ve finally seen sense.”
“I never really thought you were responsible. It fits in with what we thought about someone setting you up. Now, who would want to do that? Perhaps Reid Miller?”
“Who?” said Ryan.
“The man I took you to see in hospital. That proves you’re lying because you never forget anything, as you’re so fond of reminding me.”
“It’s been a long day.”
“Rubbish. Now you need to tell me exactly what’s going on. Then at least I’ll know if more incidents like this occur, and they will because I don’t think whoever’s doing this is going to stop any time soon. They’re getting a taste for it. I also think whoever killed Cardew also killed those two men on Christmas Day. So are you going to share or are you going to let yourselves be dragged down by sheer stubbornness?”
“We’ve no idea what you’re talking about,” said Ryan, folding his arms across his chest.
“Oh for God’s sake,” said Ashley. “I thought you were supposed to be a genius but you know what? You’re a fucking idiot.”
Rachel’s eyebrows went up while Ryan didn’t react, which only made Ashley more angry.
“Don’t say I didn’t warn you,” he snarled at them before storming out, slamming the front door shut behind him.
“Perhaps we should tell him about Reid?” said Rachel. “He does have a point.”
“I know but I can’t see a way of doing that without dropping Leah in it.”
“She’s only a minor, surely he wouldn’t push for her to be prosecuted?”
“I’m not sure and I’m not willing to take the chance. I’m confident we can handle this ourselves.”
Rachel sighed and nodded. “I don’t see any other way.”
Jackson walked into the bedroom while Jules was changing.
“Oh, sorry,” he said, doing his best not to look. “Do you want me to leave?”
“No, it’s okay,” she said, pulling on her vest and diving beneath the covers. “All done.”
He stripped down to his underwear, Jules hating herself for watching him but her body had fully woken to the possibility of sex again thanks to sparring with Mikey, who had looked so hot in the ring and then spending the rest of the day in close proximity to him. She’d gone for a long time without sex, surely she was entitled to treat herself?
She lay on her side to face Jackson, who similarly turned to face her. He wrapped an arm around her waist and they rolled closer to each other. He kissed her and slowly she began to relax, enjoying the feel of his muscles beneath her fingers. It popped into her head that Cindy had probably enjoyed the same feeling and she tore her mouth away from his.
“What’s wrong?” he said.
“Do you even need to ask?”
“She’s not here for me, not in the slightest. All I’m thinking about - all I ever think about - is you.”
Jules thought he was being sweet but she
knew that wasn’t true. She hadn’t been in his thoughts at all that morning at the hospital.
She shut out the irritating, persistent voice in her head that wouldn’t stop obsessing about him and Cindy together and relaxed into the feel of her husband’s body against her own, her sweet, decent husband who had never killed or maimed anyone, who had never dealt in drugs or been an assassin-for-hire. This good, kind man who had made one mistake. Well, technically two but she was counting them together. She’d made plenty of mistakes in her time and had been given a second chance by her family. Surely she could do the same for him?
She let him remove her vest and kiss her bare breasts, which superficially felt good but something was lacking. There wasn’t the usual chemistry but that was hardly surprising when he’d knocked up another woman.
Furiously she locked the whining voice out, slamming a door shut in its fucking face and finally she could enjoy the pleasure he was giving her, satisfying a strong need that had been ignored for months.
Jackson moved lower, sliding down her shorts, amazed she’d let him get this far and praying she let him keep going. When he slid his tongue inside her she gasped and arched her spine, fingers tightening in his hair, parting her legs wider.
“Get up,” she said.
He lifted his head, confused. “What?”
“I said get the fuck up.”
He sat up on his haunches, confused, only to be knocked onto his back. Jules glared down at him, eyes alight with fury. She looked so angry he half-expected to see a weapon in her hands. Instead of killing him she yanked down his underwear and straddled him, the way her lips curved into a malicious smile showing him Venom was still alive and well inside her. In fact he got the feeling his actions had brought her back to life after she’d lain dormant for so long.
As Jules took him inside her she grabbed his arms and pinned them to the bed while thrusting her tongue into his mouth, her body frantically undulating against his. He knew she was taking out all her aggression and pain at what he’d done while reclaiming him from another woman and he thought what a wonderful way it was to do that. She hurt him, raking her fingernails down his skin, drawing blood, nipping at his neck with her teeth, leaving bruises but compared to the usual pain Jules liked to inflict, this was nothing.
When she threw back her head and let out a cry he gazed up at her in awe, a huge wave of pleasure engulfing his own body. How could he ever have cheated on this woman? She was magnificent.
Jules’s body relaxed and her eyes slowly rolled open, the rage they’d contained gone. She climbed off him and moved to lie back down on the bed but he pulled her to him.
“Get off me,” she said, struggling in his grip.
“No,” he replied, breathless. “That was progress.”
“It was just a shag, fulfilling a physical need,” she muttered, still struggling. “That was all.”
“It was more than that.” He stroked her face and her struggles eased. “That was a big step forward for us. Let’s take another one.”
As he kissed her he felt her tears staining his cheek. He pulled back slightly to look into her eyes and wiped away her tears with his thumbs. “Just let it out.”
She lay in his arms and cried softly into his chest while he cradled her and kissed her hair.
Jules woke the next morning feeling a little lighter. She’d managed to release a lot of pent-up emotion last night. Her psychiatrist would be proud.
She glanced at the clock and saw it was twelve o’clock. She’d been asleep eleven hours but obviously she’d needed it.
She could hear Jackson downstairs talking to Cara, no doubt getting her lunch ready and the sound made her smile. Perhaps there was hope for them after all?
She pulled on her pyjama bottoms and a jumper and headed downstairs to find Cara seated at the table, eating her lunch while Jackson cooked.
“Alright babe?” he smiled. “Sleep well?”
“Yeah, good thanks.” She sat at the table opposite Cara, who regarded her mistrustfully as she continued to shovel food into her mouth. “I see you still like your food,” she smiled. “What are you eating?”
She didn’t reply.
“Come on honey,” said Jackson. “Tell Mummy what you’re eating.”
“Wheatie Bix,” she replied without looking at her.
“Yummy,” said Jules, her good mood giving her more patience. “I think I’ll have some too. It was always one of my favourites.”
Still Cara didn’t reply but at least she hadn’t screamed at her yet, which she was taking as a good sign.
“Jez and Cathy want to visit today,” said Jackson, placing a bowl of cereal before Jules. “I said it was okay, I hope you don’t mind?”
“I don’t mind. It’ll be good to see them and Cara likes playing with Ruby and Jack, don’t you sweetie?”
“I like Emily best,” she replied.
“Who’s Emily?” Jules asked Jackson.
He looked sheepish. “Cindy’s daughter.”
Jules felt the good feelings she’d woken up with dissipating. “Oh.”
“She and Cara go to nursery together,” added Jackson, shifting uncomfortably. “They’re really good friends.”
“Well, there’s no reason why they can’t still play together,” Jules said into her cereal.
“Maybe it would be better if Cara went over there to play?”
“No, I have to get used to this and the sooner I start trying the better. Invite her round this afternoon, after Jez and Cathy have gone.”
“You don’t need to do this so soon babe.”
“Yes I do,” she said, keeping her head bowed. “The longer I leave it the harder it’ll get and I don’t want Cara to suffer for my feelings. Invite her round.”
“If you want. Err, shall I call Cindy?”
Bile rose in Jules’s throat so just nodded, stabbing at the lumpy cereal with her spoon, not trusting herself to speak.
Jackson left the room to make the call, Jules listening in closely to his conversation. He was only in the hall so she could make out what he was saying. She kept her gaze on her cereal, so Cara wouldn’t see the pain in her eyes as she listened to him make the arrangements. He was brief and to the point, telling Cindy to bring Emily round at two o’clock. She had hoped he’d hang up after that but he went on to ask her how she was feeling, there was a brief discussion about morning sickness and then he hung up and returned to the kitchen. “I’m going to pick Emily up at two.”
“No,” said Jules, dragging her gaze off the cereal bowl and onto him. “Get Cindy to bring her here.”
“So this is what this is really about,” he said. “You want to meet her?”
“Yes.”
“Why are you doing this to yourself? It’s not necessary.”
“Yes it is. I want to meet her. Don’t worry, I promise I’ll be on my best behaviour. We all knew this moment would come and I’m sick of thinking about it, wondering what she’s like. It’s driving me crazy.”
“Okay babe, I’ll call her back and tell her.”
“You do that,” she said frostily.
Jules could hardly concentrate on Jez and Cathy’s visit, her eyes continually slipping to the clock, watching the hands tick closer to two o’clock. Fortunately they just took this to mean she was tired and left early. When they’d gone Jackson tried to convince her to let him pick up Emily but she was having none of it.
Bang on two o’clock a small red car pulled up outside their house and Jules stood by the window to watch a very attractive blond hop out, her insides squirming with nerves and anger. Maybe this wasn’t wise? She could be very volatile and that woman was pregnant.
As Cindy walked up the drive holding the hand of a little blond girl, Jules retreated from the window.
“You stay there babe,” said Jackson when the bell rang. “I’ll get it.”
Ignoring him, Jules strode to the door and pulled it open, the blond woman’s huge eyes widening when she saw her.
&n
bsp; “Err, hello,” said Cindy, not knowing whether to smile or not, her lips doing an awkward dance on her face. “You must be Jules?”
Jules nodded sternly, too busy examining her to reply, annoyed to find that Cindy was very pretty, beautiful even, her daughter a mini replica of her.
Cara pushed past Jules. “Cindy,” she beamed.
Pain lanced through Jules as she watched her rival get greeted much more cordially by her own daughter than she ever had.
“Hello sweetie,” said Cindy, casting an uncertain look at Jules. “Emily is very excited about playing with you.” She was relieved when Jackson appeared in the doorway behind Jules, placing a reassuring hand on his wife’s shoulder.
“Thanks for dropping her off Cindy,” he said.
“You’re welcome. Do you want me to pick her up?” she said, her look telling her she desperately hoped he’d say no.
“No, it’s alright, I’ll drop her off.”
“Right,” she replied with a thankful smile. “It was nice meeting you Jules,” she said. “I’m glad you’re better.”
Jules threw her a glare, her eyes flicking to her stomach before walking back inside, shoving her way past Jackson.
“She’s really angry,” whispered Cindy, wrapping an arm around her stomach.
“Just give her time,” he whispered back. “See you later.”
“Yeah, bye,” she replied, turning and hurrying back to her car.
He walked back into the house to find the two children happily playing together in the lounge, Jules hovering in the doorway, watching them. It made him sad to see the anxiety shining in her eyes again after how relaxed she’d looked when she’d got up. She was also picking at her nails again.
“You’ve made yourself bleed,” he said, gently taking her left hand.
She shrugged, keeping her gaze on the children. “You should be with Cindy.”
“What?”
“Look how happy Cara is now Emily’s here.”
“Come on,” he said, leading her into the kitchen.
He wrapped a piece of kitchen roll around the bleeding tip of her finger and cradled her hand to his chest. “What was that comment about?” he said.
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