by Johanna Maas
When the strategies had been formed, it was decided the three Campbell sentries who had accompanied the Highlanders to the wedding would travel home immediately to their keep to prepare and amass their men. In just three days time, they were to meet on the western side of the Macnab where they would merge the two clans together to fight as one.
Lizbeth listened intently and did not notice as Cait approached her from behind, silently placing her hand upon her arm. The two women drew back and away from the men and into the corner of the room. As they stood by, they never moved their eyes from their families and their clansmen as they watched in silence as the production unfolded before them.
As the dawn began to break upon the horizon, the Laird Stewart spoke loudly to all those within the great room.
"It is time. We must gather our beasts so we can be on our way. We will depart within the quarter hour!"
A loud cheer went up as he raised his fist into the air, the sign of their strength and the symbol of their loyalty and of their brotherhood.
The two women stood in the corner watching as the hall began to empty, both too forlorn to move but a brave showing upon each of their faces. It was their fathers and their lairds who first moved towards them, each quickly saying their farewells to their respective daughters. Simultaneously, they moved to exit through the great wooden doors. Next, it was Lucas and Burk who quickly embraced their own sisters as they too, made their way out of the great chamber.
When the hall was nearly empty, it was Macay who made his way over to the women's side. He first stepped in front of Lizbeth, looking into her eyes with a slight smile upon his lips. He opened his arms and she moved quickly within as he held her tightly.
Lowly, he whispered, "Be brave, dear sister and do not fret. We will be home soon. And do take care of my bride while I am gone…"
"Yes, Macay, if you understand nothing else, please be assured of that."
With a final squeeze and a kiss laid upon her forehead, he released her.
Macay then moved on to his wife of less than a day. He stood before her for a long moment as he gazed deeply into her eyes while attempting to memorize every detail of her lovely face and brand it to his memory. Then she was in his arms and he was kissing her hungrily as a man completely impassioned would do.
Lizbeth closed her eyes as a sheer happiness flooded through her for the passion that was obviously theirs. Tears of delight filled her eyes as a true gladness flooded her heart. As quickly as Macay had kissed his new wife, he was gone and off across the hall and away to do his duty to his clan.
The great chamber was now empty save for the two solitary women standing side by side within the corner of the room. Lizbeth's breath nearly caught within her throat as the pain within her breast grew severely as she looked slowly around the empty room. As Lizbeth wrestled with the misery within her heart, she could hear the noises from the courtyard below as the panic began to overwhelm her.
The men were now leaving. She heard the decisive call to action as she could hear them begin moving in formation down the dirt path and beyond the keep's walls. They were departing with no understanding of their safe return home.
And he had not come. Her warrior was now gone. She had assumed he may not seek her out based on how he had left her in the stables, but there had been a small glimmer of hope in the back of her mind she had been wrong. She had hoped he had cared for her at least a little bit or would think enough of her to simply say good-bye. Even if those words would not have been spoken, she hoped he would simply gaze at her from across the room. But he had not and now she believed she knew the entire truth of it. She had been such a fool to think he cared for her as much as she did for him.
At that moment, the gates burst open upon Lizbeth's heart and the dejection consumed her. Her tears fell freely as her body began to wrack uncontrollably with sobs. She brought her hands to her face in an attempt to hide her misery as she began to tremble in grief.
Cait watched as Lizbeth went from being quite brave to crumbling beneath the wave of sadness in a very short period of time. She moved closer and took Lizbeth within her arms, trying to provide her strength and comfort her as best she could. For a long while they stood as such, Lizbeth's pain outwardly showing and Cait's trapped within as the clamor of the silent keep reverberated through each of their hearts.
As Lizbeth continued with her uncontrolled outburst, Cait attempted to soother her. "Please, the men will be home soon. You will see and we have to believe all will be well."
Cait could feel Lizbeth within her arms as she slowly shook her head, still too emotional to speak. She stepped back slightly, attempting to gain her face and to understand what was really behind her sudden outburst of emotion.
Between the tears Lizbeth said in torment, "He…did not…even say goodbye…" Lizbeth stepped back within her embrace, laying her head upon Cait's shoulder as her tears continued to fall and the misery consumed her.
Cait could only rationalize now there was just one reason for her misery and it had to be her own brother Blake. While nothing had been spoken before her, she was certain there must have been some sort of an attachment between the two. She was confident she had seen it in each of their eyes and especially when the other was near.
Until Lizbeth's reaction, she had not thought much of Blake's missive she had received early this morning. He had sent word he had wanted to say his farewell to her alone in the courtyard. She had also understood he needed to disclose some important family news to her.
Cait now realized with a certain sadness how this turn of events had affected her brother and reflected upon the news their father had announced. It was that Blake was soon to be wedded to a Monro, had been pledged and the banns were soon to be announced. Speaking with her brother and hearing of this news was where she had been just prior to taking Lizbeth's side.
And now with a misery upon her own heart, she truly understood what must be at the center of Lizbeth's grief. For her heart had truly been broken when he had not even taken the time nor effort to say his farewells to her. Cait closed her eyes in sure sadness and knew not what she could do about it.
*****
Lizbeth stood before the window in her chamber on that same afternoon feeling the grave misery. She had to admit if to no one other than herself she was missing the men of the keep already. To be fair, while she did miss her brothers and her father dearly, it was Blake's absence that ripped mostly at her heart. Even after all that had occurred, she knew she was lost without him.
She closed her eyes as visions of her warrior's handsome and hardened face flashed through her mind. It was his deep blue eyes and his powerful stance that she conceded that would always take her breath away. She wrapped her arms around herself and hugged tightly, attempting to remember how it felt to be within his arms. When she was, she always felt so safe and so protected and loved…that loss alone was so dreadfully noted upon her heart.
As she stood before the window drowning in the misery of her own thoughts, Lizbeth heard her door open and the soft footfalls cross the floor. She knew it could be no one other then her new sister Cait as she moved to stand beside her. Together they stood gazing out the window into the far horizon, neither speaking yet each silently acknowledging the other.
After a while, it was Cait spoke quietly, "I am so sorry, Lizbeth."
Lizbeth could only close her eyes for she was unable to speak and unsure as how to respond. There was nothing more that she knew could be said. He had loved her passionately and then left her without so much as a farewell.
Cait continued, "I know 'tis not my place to speak of it but I have observed from afar and understand the attachment between you and my brother Blake."
Lizbeth could only close her eyes tighter for the mention of his name and Cait's understanding of what was at the root of her misery.
"And I am most sorry it has come to this, for father has always had a plan and always warned us of our duty…"
Lizbeth felt as if her he
art had just been ripped from within her breast as a large crushing pain befell her fully. For what exactly was Cait saying? What news was she disclosing? Lizbeth held her breath as she waited for her sister to speak, unable to ask herself nor form the words.
Cait continued, "Blake told me in the courtyard this morning he is to be wed soon to a woman from the Monro clan from the north. 'Tis father's wish and his duty to our clan."
Lizbeth's heart began to constrict painfully as she found it now exceedingly difficult to breathe. There was a crushing ache now threatening to overtake her as the fresh tears flowed down her cheeks. The harsh reality of her sister's words resonated within the silent room and tore painfully at her heart.
Blake was not free, would now never be free to love her and to protect her nor truly make her his own. A shattering feeling encompassed her body as Lizbeth realized her life and any dreams she may have harbored for an existence with her warrior were now gone. Truly and unequivocally, no more. And that pain was incredible and nothing like anything she could ever have believed possible. Her heart was broken, was truly shattered and she realized she was now cast aside.
As the reality of it all fell upon her, Lizbeth attempted to breathe normally and to gain her voice so she could ask one very simple question. She wanted to know only because she needed to understand if he had any knowledge before they were together in the stables. Not that it would have mattered for she knew in her heart she would never regret nor ever change any of her actions. Regardless of the answer, she still would have given herself freely to this man. But she needed to know, if for nothing else then for her own mind.
"When did Blake find out of his betrothal?"
With a sigh, Cait responded, "Father summoned him to his rooms and told him just last eve."
Lizbeth released the breath she had been holding as she believed she now understood at least a portion of it. While the pain within her heart aggrieved her immensely, she knew she could never hold an anger towards her warrior for what had now been revealed as a sure travesty for the two. She now understood Blake did not take her offering knowing he had already been pledged to another. And deep down inside, Lizbeth truly wanted to believe he could never knowingly do that to her. And Cait had confirmed that detail for her explicitly. As much as Lizbeth understood her warrior, she had known this of him and trusted this from him, was assured he would never knowingly do her harm.
The only regret Lizbeth now possessed was she wished he could have spoken to her before he left. Deep inside, she wished he had believed her strong enough and worthy enough to hear those words directly from his own lips. But he had not and that itself bestowed a new pain upon her heart for it revealed much of what he must think of her. But she had a complete understanding, for she recognized she had oftentimes been weak within his presence. How could he believe she was anything but feeble and helpless?
With a sad heart, Lizbeth understood and appreciated the position they now found themselves in. In their lives, duty to one's clan was everything and sometimes the only thing that mattered and was the one means to keep a clan strong. She knew that end. She was brought up to understand to be sired by a chieftain and living up to the duty of the clan would always be the way of their world. And this was just how it was to be, whether Lizbeth agreed with it, or not.
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
The first attack upon the Macnab had been planned to be harsh and it was calculated. Their full force moved quickly under the cover of the darkness, sending fiery arrows over the keep's walls as an attempt was made to penetrate the castle with a lesser army. Long ladders were erected with men attempting to scale the walls but the Macnab were prepared and fought savagely with very few gaining entry.
A small group of Stewarts led by the youngest laird's son Burk, were moderately successful in they made a charge to scale the wall but only four made it effectively over. Those clansmen stood fighting with everything they had with their single objective, which was to make their way to the drawbridge. If they were successful, they would open the gates that would allow the rest of the Stewarts and Campbells access to the courtyard within the Macnab stronghold.
The progress of the small troop was immediately halted once the four made it over the top. There were several men who were scaling the ladders directly behind them and fighting valiantly but were decisively pushed back upon the ground on their own side of the stone barrier. Some sadly lost their lives for the sake of their clan's retribution as several others were severely wounded.
Those few men who remained fighting all alone atop of the wall were cutoff from their clan and surrounded. They were attacked harshly and were all severely bloodied and injured. Ultimately, those within were captured by the Macnab and roughly gathered and then thrown into their dungeons with no mercy shown to them.
In the darkness of their prison, the four men lay about upon the hard stone floor with no attention to their grave injuries and without any hope of seeing their clan ever again. They were certain their futile fates had all but been determined. They knew they were lost to their clans and surely lost to this world.
*****
Lizbeth stayed within her room for the remainder of the day and closed away from most everyone of the keep. She was simply too tired and forlorn to face her clan and choosing instead to bear her grief alone.
Even as the sun reached its apex on the next day, Lizbeth found herself still abed. While the heartache still wore heavily within, her resolution began to grow for she knew she must gather herself and learn to be strong. She could not continue to drown herself in a misery only she had created.
As Lizbeth sat upon the bed still within her night clothes, she realized it had been her decision alone to give herself to Blake. The simple truth was she had loved where she had no right. With a sadness, she realized she had no one to blame but herself. It was long since time to forgive her warrior and herself, for this travesty they now found themselves entangled in.
With a heavy sigh, she looked around her room and recognized this was her home. It had been stripped from her for seven long years. It was now up to her to make it her own and immerse herself in her clan for it 'twas her duty to do so. She also recognized it was not fair to her sister who had a new husband and one who had been taken from her side way too soon. Cait needed her for her support and for her guidance and she was resolved to be there for her as much as Cait had supported her, in her own most desperate hour.
Lizbeth closed her eyes as a deep sigh was released and a slight knock was heard upon her door. She gazed over as Cait opened it slightly with a smile forced upon her lips.
"Please, Lizbeth, may I enter?" There was a slight pause as she continued. "Lizbeth, please, you cannot stay in here forever. Come with me. I am going to go out and pick some herbs that I saw along the back wall for the winter comes soon and then they will be no more."
Lizbeth sighed deeply, knowing she must comply if for Cait's sake alone. As she sat upon the bed, she spoke with a building resolution.
"I need just a few moments to ready myself for the day and change into my gown. Please, Cait, you go on ahead and I will join you very soon. For the day is quite fair."
Cait leaned forward to the side of the bed as she placed a small kiss upon her cheek and hugged her gently.
"Very well then. I will be in the rear of the keep, when you are ready to join me."
After those words were spoken, Cait exited the room with the basket swinging from her hand and a smile upon her face.
Lizbeth moved from the bed and walked over to the window. While deep in thought, she gazed out for a short while as she looked down upon the courtyard below. A warm smile came to her lips as she watched Cait walk by while looking upwards and waving her hand. Lizbeth smiled as her heart warmed further, watching until Cait disappeared around the corner and into the bright noon sunshine.
For just a few moments longer Lizbeth stood by the window, her resolve building and her heart hardening with determination for the choices she knew she needed to
make. She now understood she must move on and learn from the past but only go forward with her life. For she had been robbed of so much these last years, but she realized there was so much living yet to be done. With a sigh, she quickly donned a new dress and made herself ready for the day.
Lizbeth walked down the worn path next to the keep and in the direction of the rear kitchens. She looked up towards the afternoon sky absently, closing her eyes briefly as she allowed the autumn sun to warm her face, her mood slightly lifting for the feel of it.
As she rounded the final corner that would bring the rear gardens into view, a slight feeling of anxiousness crossed her heart as she looked around not seeing Cait anywhere. She moved her eyes across the stone wall, now falling upon the small door buried within and now sitting slightly ajar. A fear began to grow in her heart for this gate was to be always closed and locked. This door was also the same one she and her mother exited on that fateful day those many years ago.
Lizbeth held her breath as she ran forward quickly, the large stone walls now looming high above her. Timidly, she gained the entryway as she looked through to the other side, still not spying Cait. Lizbeth's pulse raced as her heart skipped within her breast as she spied the lone basket lying as if forgotten upon the ground. There were a few herbs within and several more scattered about.
Lizbeth ran hastily out while her heart raced as her breath came in heavy rasps. A fear encompassed her as she gazed into the distance, spying six large dark riders quickly moving away from the keep and down the winding path. She watched for a moment longer as they turned slightly to round a small bend, seeing the dark red hair of her dear sister Cait as she rode before one of her captors.
A panic encompassed her like no other as she ran back to the nearly empty stables with only one goal upon her mind. She gained her great gray and moved quickly out the same door buried deep within the back of the stone walls. Without a thought or a reason, she galloped quickly after them, the only thought upon her mind was to follow to see where they may have taken Cait.
