“Fine, but if he changes his mind, he is so not getting my slice,” she said.
They laughed.
“I guess we’ve got a wedding to plan then,” her mother said, as she and her betrothed entered the barn to tell Darcy the good news.
~*~
Clementine hated watching her brother behave so badly. It was bad enough he left poor Gabriella high and dry that day at the races. But then to not even reach out to her to explain or apologize or anything? And worse still, to turn into his own mini chain gang, as some sort of bizarre means of self-punishment? At least when he watched reality TV all day long she could talk to him. Now he just hid from everyone out in his field.
She’d been going to Gab’s yoga class three times a week and while it was obvious Gabriella was still a bit fragile—just the weight loss alone she’d gone through made that abundantly clear—she thought at least she was healing. A bit. Which gave her an idea.
Chapter Thirty-Two
“So let me understand this,” Gabriella said to Clementine, who’d hit her up with one of the most ludicrous of ideas she’d heard in a while. The two of them had gone for a run on Gab’s property after yoga class. “Your mother is getting married in a small, intimate wedding and she wants me to be there.”
Clementine nodded. “Yes! Exactly!”
“Um, because?”
“Because she enjoyed spending time with you and she thinks you’re a really lovely young woman and she wants to make it up to you for what a complete dope my brother is.”
“But at her wedding? Me?”
“I know, it seems a little nutty, but this is hardly even going to be like a normal wedding,” she said. “I mean it’s like me and Sebastian, Darcy and Caroline, and well Sawyer because he’s making the cake, and Isabella. And her mum because she and my mum are besties. And of course her husband. But pretty much that’s it.” Clem leaned toward her and grinned. “Aside from those two, it’ll be more like a party with your yoga class!”
“This seems like a crazy notion,” Gabriella said.
“Look, Gab, you need to get out. It’s going to be great weather, a beautiful afternoon, we’ll be outside with friends and cake and champagne.”
“You forgot to mention a certain person I do not want to see.”
“Have no fears,” she said, surprised she even brought him up. Until now, he was entirely unmentionable. “Nobody even sees the man. He goes out in the field and digs rows for planting all day long. Barely grunts a word to anyone, ever. I think he’s off his rocker.”
Gabriella frowned. That sounded pretty pathetic. What the heck had gotten into him? He was doing so well. At least until, the, er, episode. “Have you spoken with him about that at all?”
Clem lifted her hands in surrender. “Not me, thanks. I don’t want to be the one who gets her head screamed off. I figure he’ll lighten up by the year 2020.”
“So it would be family and your mum’s closest friends. And me.”
“If you’re going to look at it that way, then the baker too.”
“At least he has an official role in things.”
“So why don’t we just have you be the surrogate for my lunkheaded brother. You can be Edouardo-in-absentia.”
That made Gab laugh. “Given how he’s behaved, I’m not sure if I want to be Edouardo anything.”
The two of them stopped running. “Look, Gabriella,” she said. “Come. Won’t you please? I just want to make this as special a day for my mother as possible. She really wants this tiny, simple wedding in a field, nothing more. And she asked for only a few people to attend. And your name was among them. So would you do that for her?”
Gabriella rolled her eyes. “How am I supposed to say no to that? It’s like asking me to fulfill a dying patient’s last wish. Of course I’ll come. But under no circumstances should your brother be within a hundred feet of me. Understood?”
~*~
Clementine heard the shower running in Edouardo’s room. It was after midnight. She didn’t care, she was going in.
“Pssst,” she said over the din of running water. “Hey! You!” She pounded on the shower door.
Edouardo jumped. “Crap, Clementine. What the hell are you doing here? I’m trying to take a shower. In peace. And solitude.”
Could no one just leave him alone? It was enough to make him want to move to a cave in a remote mountain pass somewhere. Maybe the Khyber Pass. Only somewhere less dangerous. The Alps, maybe. And while there, perhaps he could go skiing. Or hiking. Except his body hurt too damned much to do anything fun like that.
“Fine,” she said. “That’s just great. But I’m here to make sure you don’t cause any trouble.”
“Would you please first get behind the door?” he said. “I really would rather my sister not be hanging out in here while I’m naked in the shower.”
“Seriously I wouldn’t dream of looking,” she said. “That’s the stuff of nightmares.” She moved herself behind the bathroom door. “Okay so here’s the deal. If Gabriella comes out here at all you need to stay far away from her.”
What? That was a stupid thing to request. First of all, she would no sooner show her face at Weltenham than he would at her home. Second of all, so what if she did show up there? He could be perfectly polite and civil. He was a dumbass. And a coward. But he wasn’t rude. Unless being a dumbass and a coward also qualified as rude. Which perhaps they would, if you didn’t jump in and defend your “official” girlfriend when her crackpot ex made a whacked-out scene at an official royal event. Hell, the guy was an American—they were lucky he didn’t have a gun.
But Edouardo was so busy being freaked out and jealous that this man had tried to restake his claim on Gabriella, and he was so certain she would change her mind and go running back to him, that he just completely lost his own shit and failed to act.
And in those brief, crucial moments, he betrayed himself to her and to everyone there to be a complete and total pussy—not a man who deserved the likes of Gabriella—but a pathetic loser who should keep to himself and not worry about subjecting everyone else to him.
It was then and there he decided he was just going to live off the land and not bother with others. That was, as soon as he could get his farm operating and his house habitable. So he set about working practically round the clock to make it happen. And his efforts were paying off, though he wished like hell he had someone to share it with. Someone like Gabriella. But it was too late. That train had left the station and definitely had not wanted to take on any last-minute spineless passengers.
“Look, Clementine,” he said, “I have no plans for being a thorn in her side ever again. She is welcome to be a guest here any time, and I assure you I will keep my distance.”
Even though his heart wanted only to close the distance between them. Too bad it was too late for that sentiment.
Chapter Thirty-Three
Edouardo was exhausted. He’d been working from dawn till dark for so many weeks he’d lost count of what day it was. It was hard, hard labor, but it was honest work. Luckily he’d already used some of the estate’s heavy machinery to get rid of the weeds that had overgrown the property. That was before he’d lost his shit at the horse race.
After that, it was all him. He could have borrowed more equipment from Darcy and Alastair, but he didn’t want to be beholden to anyone now. He wanted to just be his own free agent. And he wanted to work out his anger, his rage, his whatever it was that kept tripping him up. So early in the morning he would begin, digging up the soil and turning it over. Salvaging the topsoil but breaking up the clumps of earth and loosening the soil. Acre after acre after acre, he tilled the soil, digging deep, often more than a foot down. And when he was certain he’d loosened up that dirt so his plants could take root and thrive, he raked the soil until his hands bled, loosening the topsoil even more. Perhaps in his efforts to make a healthy environment for his plants, he was helping to create a healthier mental environment for him: with all that work he had t
ime to think, to ruminate and try to figure out where his brain was and why he kept sabotaging himself.
Sometimes that was the harder work: figuring himself out. His body? Well at some point it went on autopilot. He’d grown strong over the past many weeks, and his hands were calloused. His back was certainly yelling at him by the end of the day, but it was a good kind of complaining, something that came with an honest day’s work. In some ways, Edouardo wished life could go back to this old-fashioned way of doing things. Back then, sure, you worked hard but you also weren’t subjected to all the outside noise that life threw at you now. Do this, do that, please this person, be however this one wants you to be.
He imagined it was a lot easier back then, when you could just be your own man and live your life.
It was after dark when his mother showed up. He hadn’t even seen her walking toward him, with so little moonlight.
“Edouardo?” she said, her voice hesitant.
“Mum?” he said, not sure what she wanted from him at eleven o’clock at night out in his fields.
“Honey, I’m not sure what it is you’re up to, but I want you to know I have faith that you are working things out on your own,” she said. “You’re a smart young man and you have so much going for you. You’ve always been my sensitive baby boy—”
Edouardo winced. Baby boy.
His mother waved her hand dismissively. “You could be a hundred years old and you’ll still be my baby boy,” she said. “Because I love you so much, honey. You and your sister and your brother, you’re what I have left of your father. And you know I loved your father with all my heart.”
Edouardo was silent. If she loved his father so much, why was she marrying Alastair? Of course he didn’t even need to ask that question; she had to know that was swirling through his mind.
“Life is for the living, son,” she said. “Your father lived his life so brilliantly. He left behind no regrets, although I’d imagine the speed and untimeliness with which it ended would certainly be just about his only regret. And I know your father would want you to live with no regrets as well. I can assure you that’s what I wish for you, Edouardo.
“I’m telling you this because you deserve to know it,” she said. “Tomorrow, Alastair and I will exchange our vows and become husband and wife.”
Edouardo jumped forward as if to object, but she ignored him.
“Edouardo, this is my life to live,” she said. “I understand you would rather I not move forward and not experience a life to the fullest. And by fullest I mean with someone I love by my side to share in the joys and losses that inevitably befall us all. But I have made my choice, and I hope at some point in your life you will reconcile yourself with that and welcome Alastair as my husband. Even though he’s always truly been a member of the family, now we are making it official.”
Edouardo speared his hoe into the ground and just stared at her.
“There’s something important I have for you, sweetheart,” she said, reaching into her pocket and pulling out a black velvet box that contained both her wedding and engagement rings. She reached for his hand and placed the box in his palm. “I don’t expect you to do anything with these right now, but I want you to have them. And I hope that someday you’ll want to have them, when you’re ready to settle down. I’m not trying to get rid of these lovely, sentimental mementos of your father’s and my love, but rather, I am making sure they will be loved and cherished by the next generation, and with it a little piece of your father gets passed on too.”
Edouardo’s eyes welled with unspent tears, tears that had built up for so many long months of loss and sadness and heartbreak and betrayal and embarrassment and even self-pity. Which was perhaps a little justified but also was a bit out of control.
His mother pulled her son into a strong embrace, the kind only a mother could give to her baby boy, even if he was a grown-up and twice her size. The two of them wept quietly for a while, so many unspoken words flowing between them.
“My baby boy,” she said, stretching her arms out to look at him. “Be kind to yourself. You’re a good man and you mean well and you’ll make some woman a wonderful husband someday. Just love her and understand her and cherish her with the same passion your father did me, and you’ll be assured a lifetime of happiness just as your father and I shared.”
She gave him a kiss on the tip of his nose. “Now, I’d best get back because I need my beauty sleep,” she said. “After all, I’m getting married in the morning.”
Chapter Thirty-Four
Edouardo woke somewhere around dawn, face down in a pile of dirt. His cheeks were no doubt covered with loamy streaks from all the crying he’d done. Which meant everyone would see that he’d cried himself to sleep. That is, if anyone even saw him. Because out here? Who was going to? Nevertheless, he decided it wasn’t the best of ideas to sleep in a field all night, although where else could he cry and cry and cry till he had no more crying to do and go completely undetected? Something to be said for the solitary lifestyle. But maybe not all the time.
Edouardo picked himself up, dusted himself off, and took the long walk back to the manor home. He slyly snuck in through the back door so he could avoid that snoopy sister of his. The last thing he needed was to have her giving him the twenty questions on why he looked like such hell.
He heard a lot of noise downstairs. No doubt guests arriving for the wedding. He peered out his bedroom window and saw a small shade tent being erected and folding chairs being set up. He took a long shower. It could’ve lasted an hour, for all he knew. It felt so good just to wash all the grit of his life away, like a baptism of sorts.
After he showered, he shaved, dressed, even slapped on some after-shave. Another glance out the window showed everyone was already seated. The minister from the village stood in front of the congregants, next to Alastair, who was dressed in casual khakis and a button-down shirt. He tried to discern who all was sitting there, waiting, and he counted Sawyer—Sawyer? What the hell was he doing there?—and Isabella; her parents; Caroline, of course; Clem and Sebastian. And then someone else. He stared for a hard second, because he couldn’t imagine it was who it looked to be. Although he had been warned. Which doesn’t mean he had to honor his word to steer clear. It was, after all, his mother’s wedding day, and he was certainly entitled to attend her wedding.
He heard a door slam downstairs and glanced below to see Darcy walking his mother toward the tent. She had on a simple floral dress. She was barefoot. Walking in a cow pasture. If his mother wasn’t at peace with her life, then no one was.
Before leaving the room, he grabbed one thing off his dresser, stuck it in his pocket, and took the steps two by two.
~*~
There wasn’t even anyone playing music. Just the minister and Alastair and his mother, walking down the very short aisle on the arm of her eldest, Darcy, who looked so proud to escort her. Edouardo felt a pang of shame about that, that he wasn’t big enough to have done it. But then, instead of wallowing in that shame, he sprinted and caught up to them both and looped his elbow into her other arm. The two of them ushered their mother down the aisle to greet a very surprised Alastair.
Edouardo glanced at his mother and saw tears trickling down her face, and he wiped them away with his work-roughened thumb. He leaned over and gave her a hug and a kiss. “I love you Mum,” he said. “And I’m so happy for you both.” He reached out to give Alastair a hug as well, and they stood that way for a minute, Alastair just patting his back. It felt good to be held in his fatherly embrace.
After that, Edouardo found a seat in the back row and remained quiet as the short ceremony proceeded. He did his best not to stare overtly at Gabriella, but it was hard not to. She’d lost weight, too much so, since he’d last seen her. Her face was a little sallow, like maybe she’d been as unhappy as had he. But she was still the beautiful young woman who’d not only stolen his heart, but actually allowed him to reclaim it, since it had been so very broken before she came along. He
hoped he would have a chance to let her know how much that meant to him.
~*~
At the end of the ceremony, Queen Ariana stood up and jokingly announced, “By the powers vested in me as the sovereign ruler of this great nation, I now pronounce you husband and wife.”
Everyone stood up and cheered as the happy couple kissed for the first time as spouses. In the distance, a cow lowed in agreement, a rooster crowed, and hawks soared overhead, observing the event. It was, Edouardo knew in his heart of hearts, a good day to be alive.
Chapter Thirty-Five
Sawyer, as the official baker of this shindig, attended to the cutting of the cake while Isabella took it upon herself to pour the champagne. “Considering it’s the thing I drink the most, I should be the one to dispense it,” she said.
Edouardo and Gabriella sort of circled around one another but you could only do that so much with only a dozen or so people in your presence. Inevitably they were going to need to speak. This time, Edouardo seized the chance, rather than letting it escape yet again.
He nodded to Gabriella. “You look beautiful,” he said. She wore a pastel floral sundress and flat sandals and her hair had somehow been French braided and it looked so adorable, in that milkmaid sort of way that gave rise to all sorts of barnyard fantasies. He was, after all, a guy. A guy who hadn’t been laid in a long damned time.
“Thank you,” she said, eyeing him a bit apprehensively. “You’re looking so, well, strong.”
One corner of his mouth lifted into a wry smile. “I’ve been hard at work.”
“Oh?” she said. “A new project?”
“You might say a really old project. One that needed a complete overhaul.” Certainly that applied to him as well as his fields and his house. “A new outlook.”
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