I needed to make him accept that she was gone from his life. Forever.
Heading back to Cash’s apartment, which I still didn’t consider home, my heart ached for yet another woman. Rainey. I left her messages but she hadn’t returned any of my calls. She warned me not to get involved with Cash, and she’d been right. There was no way she could help me with this.
I stopped in the middle of the staircase when I heard a sound I didn’t recognize—a woman’s laughter. At first I thought it was in my own head. I’d been daydreaming about Rainey; could she actually be laughing at me in my own visions? Cash’s voice followed, low and melodic, and the woman laughed again. This wasn’t in my head.
Daddy had a date tonight.
Whoever it was, he’d play her like an instrument, getting the exact result he desired for his pleasure. Faking a cough before I continued, I braced myself for what I was about to walk in on. Cash promised me he wouldn’t change his lifestyle for me and I believed him. But no amount of planning could have prepared me to see my mother’s face in the living room.
I gasped, retreating from the couch. I was here, in the basement of Circus Circus, I knew it. All of Cash’s things were here. Cash was here. He couldn’t tear his gaze away this woman. Lust, desire, and disgust vibrated throughout the room, swirling in my head. I almost lost my balance. I just fed from Cash’s emotions for the very first time, and I wanted to throw up.
This woman didn’t look exactly like my mother. Her ivory skin was smooth, well taken care of, and slathered with too much makeup. She did a nice job on it, but she didn’t need it. She bleached some of her red hair blonde, and pinned it up similarly to Bette did for her performances. But her features were dead on. I knew them well, I looked at them every day in the mirror. Her mouth dropped when she turned to me, not expecting to see another woman, so close to her own age and likeness, come into the apartment unannounced.
Cash caught my eye and another one of his emotions slammed against me—regret. All this time around vampires and I was starting to read their emotions. I took several steps backward, toward my bedroom. Someone was going to have to say something.
“Holly, let me introduce you to my friend, Lennon.” Cash broke the silence, but he didn’t clarify our relationship.
“Hi,” I squeaked out. Wait a minute. “What did you say your name was?”
“It’s Lennon.” She smiled brightly at me, then frowned when I gasped. I could have sworn he said Lana. It was so close. “Nice to meet you, Holly.”
Lennon looked back to Cash in confusion. Instead of explaining why another young woman who looked just like her just walked down the stairs, he smiled at her, his gaze smoldering, and she melted. He was using whatever mind control on her that he used on everyone else in this building. The same thing he was doing to get away with murder.
“I’m going to bed.” They probably didn’t even hear me, they were already lost in one another. Cash’s hand was on Lennon’s knee, and she bit her painted red lip as she smiled seductively at him.
I didn’t need to see any more. “Nice to meet you,” I mumbled.
Falling on my bed, I finally exhaled. It didn’t bother me that Cash brought a date home. It bothered me that it was her. A human who wore fruity perfume and a flower in her hair. One who laughed at his jokes, hoping it would land her in his bed. This wasn’t a coincidence. Nothing Cash did was an accident. Cash’s emotions left an aftertaste on my tongue, his disgust choking me. The disgust wavered above his desire and usual depravity—the idea of it made my head spin.
Cash was toying with his prey, and Lennon was playing a game she couldn’t possibly win.
Chapter Eighteen
I might be half vampire, but I liked to think I inherited very little from Cash, besides immortality. And now suddenly the ability to read emotions. What the hell was that? Maybe I let more of Blade inside me than I bargained for.
I lay awake all night, cringing every time I heard Lennon moan. What was I going to do, interrupt whatever they were doing and urge her to run because he wanted to kill her? She was already under Cash’s spell. I didn’t know how to break it.
And I wasn’t sure I wanted to. When I thought of her sitting on that couch, trying to seduce my dad, it always led to the same thing. A replay of the vision of my mother batting me away. Telling me to go back to Hell.
Rejection, that’s what I saw.
Blade was right, I wanted people to like me. And he was also right that there were only a handful of people who were really worth it. I wanted to come first for those people. Like my mother.
Revenge, that’s what I wanted.
Lennon stuck around, completely enthralled by Cash. He wouldn’t talk about her with me, said it wasn’t any of my business. Like hell. So I took the high road and avoided her as long as I could. She was trying so hard to be my friend, but I refused to let her in. Every time I looked at her, I wanted to scream, shake her, and tell her to get the hell out of here. Not because Cash was using her, but because she personified everything I couldn’t have. A normal life. The complete adoration of my father. My mother.
“Holly, your performance is incredible.” Lennon caught me off guard one afternoon in the kitchen. We both kept vampire hours. Now I had to talk to her. I glared at her as she picked up my tea kettle, helping herself to a scoop of my lavender tea. I’d run out of lettuce tea, and this was all the hotel could bring me on short notice. “I can’t take my eyes off you when you perform. The way you move is gorgeous.”
My hands rattled around my cup as I steeped the leaves. I felt bad, resenting her so much. For a couple seconds. “Thanks.”
“It’s the highlight of the show.” Lennon was either oblivious to or ignoring my discomfort with her existence. “The whole theater is completely mesmerized when you’re on stage. No one else can do what you do.”
“They’re there for Cash.” Like she was. I tried to pull away, to put an end to this conversation. She stole my oxygen. It was like payback for what I did to my mother.
“That might be true.” She followed me to the couch. “But they fall in love with you.”
She knew just what I needed to hear. I took a deep breath. I wasn’t going to let this girl seduce me, too. I tucked my feet under me, like Rainey would have, and sipped my tea. “Doesn’t it bother you that Cash is a vampire?”
“Not at all. It doesn’t matter what he is, it’s who he is that I’ve fallen for.” Lennon’s lipstick tattooed her mug. She was already fully made up, her hair in an elaborate updo. Maybe she wasn’t human after all. She looked like a china doll. “You don’t remember me, do you, Holly?”
“No. I don’t.” My mouth went dry. My memory was terrible. Many times, I didn’t know the difference between time travel and what I experienced once it happened. Lucille had made me doubt myself my whole life. Without Rainey, I couldn’t trust anyone to tell me the truth.
If Lennon said that we’d met at Bethlem, I’d run from here screaming.
I tipped my chin up, keeping my cool. “Where did we meet?” I braced myself for the answer.
“Across the street, at The Rivera.” Lennon waited for my reaction. It never occurred to me it could be worse than Bethlem. “My boyfriend was Jacey, from Fire Dancer.”
My skin flushed like it did any time that show was mentioned. She looked down to her lap. She must have known why I left the show before it even started. Jacey would have told her what happened.
“I liked him.” Jacey made a terrible vampire. He wasn’t into the drama, he wanted to make music. And I remembered Lennon now; it had been a couple years since I’d seen her, and she changed her look since then. When I met her, she looked like any other girl in the rock scene, tight clothes and a hard edge. She didn’t stand out like she did now. “I take it you’re not together anymore.”
“He’s dead.” She pressed her lips together, false eyelashes casting a shadow on her cheekbones. I sucked in a breath with her words. Vampires didn’t die. They were destroyed. Her glassy
eyes met mine. “Blade killed him.”
Hot tea flooded my lap and I folded my hands over the puddle seeping into my pants. “Why would he do that?”
I knew the general answer, but Jacey? It didn’t make any sense. He never caused any waves. He played by the rules, and been respectful.
“I have no idea.” Lennon’s voice cracked. She rushed to the kitchen to get a towel for me, pressing it into my lap when she returned. “I was hoping you might be able to find out some answers. I know you guys have been spending a lot of time together.”
“Blade’s never mentioned Jacey.” Blade knew I had bad history with Noah. He hadn’t kept his rage or his bloodlust a secret. “Fire Dancer is a touchy subject for me.”
“I know, I hate even bringing it up. I wouldn’t have, if I wasn’t worried for your safety.” She nodded when my mouth dropped. “Has he told you about his ex-girlfriend?”
“Yeah.” The word had a bite to it. “He didn’t want to be a vampire. He blames her.”
Lennon sighed. “Being a vampire isn’t that bad. The no sunlight thing sucks, but he needs to get over it. Blade’s causing a lot of problems everywhere in the city. Even if Callie wasn’t my best friend, I’d still think he was acting like a complete asshole. He almost singlehandedly shut down Immortal Dilemma. Jacey isn’t the only person he killed. He ripped Callie’s roommate practically in half, and he wasn’t even sorry. He’s been doing everything he can to make life miserable for anyone in the clan that crosses him. You need to be careful.”
“We’ve talked about this.” My voice was barely more than a whisper. “I understand why he does it.”
I hoped she didn’t ask me to explain, because that something he shared in confidence. Even though this reveal was freaking me out, I wanted to protect him. To show him there was something stronger than hate.
“I don’t think he’s told you everything.” She held her hand up to stop me before I protested. “He’s working with Noah.”
Flames erupted in my lap. I jumped up from the couch, tamping down the fire before Cash had to buy new furniture. “What do you mean... working with Noah?”
I was going to pass out. I trusted Blade. I let our connection, the magnetism blind me to everything about him. No wonder I burst into flames when I touched him—he was a fucking traitor.
“Since he thinks he’s in control of Talis’ clan, he’s working with a new band that came into town. Soul Divider. Well, they’re not new, but they just came to Vegas. They used to be pretty famous, and Talis turned them into vampires to try to rekindle some of what they lost over the years. Anyway, they needed a singer, and Blade gave Noah the job.”
I sat back down on the couch, my head falling into my hands. Lennon put her hand on my back, and I froze.
“Don’t touch me,” I growled. I still couldn’t separate Lennon in the present from the memory of my mother telling me to go back to Hell.
“I’m sorry.” Lennon jumped back. “But you needed to know.”
I stayed quiet for a long time. Thankfully, Lennon didn’t try to touch me again. Her presence was comforting, when I let it be.
“He’s working with Cash,” I finally said. “Blade’s been helping bring the girls into the show. They die, you know. Cash is murdering them. He’s cast a spell over all the humans so they don’t realize what they’ve seen, or they don’t care. I’m not human, so it doesn’t work on me. You should know that, too. What you’re getting yourself involved in. You need to be careful.”
“I know,” Lennon said quietly, playing with one of the pins in her hair. “Don’t underestimate me because I’m human. I’ve been a part of this world for a long time. Sometimes I think I understand vampires better than vampires do.”
“I doubt that.” I almost told her about my mother, but that wasn’t my secret to share. That was on Cash. I didn’t know what he wanted with her. One thing had become painfully clear during this conversation—the only allegiance I had was to myself. “You see what they want you to.”
“Everyone lets their guard down at some point.” Lennon smiled sadly. “But fine, don’t listen to me. I know who’s working with who, and what they want. I have my eyes open, doll. I know what I’m doing.”
Chapter Nineteen
“Why didn’t you tell me you were working with Noah?” I shrieked as soon as Blade and I left the hotel. He came to make his delivery and stuck around for the first half of the show. Probably because he wanted something from me. There was no way in hell he was going to get what he was looking for tonight. Sparks trailed from my skin, dripping on the pavement. I had to get this out of my system before we got in the car, or else I’d blow that Mustang sky high.
“Because I know how much he upsets you.” Blade leaned against his car, completely oblivious to the storm he stirred inside me. He did horrible things every day, but he wasn’t beyond emotion. “This way I can keep an eye on him.”
“Upsets me? Are you kidding me? He raped me!” I clenched my teeth to keep from screaming. “And you gave him a job. It doesn’t matter what depravity a vampire reaps. Rape, murder. You all drink evil like nectar.”
Blade rubbed his forehead in frustration. Oh, he had no idea what frustration was. “That’s what vampires do. They take what they want.”
“I can’t believe you’re siding with him.” Fire seeped from my skin, searing my clothes. “I can’t believe I ever trusted you.”
Blade raked his hands through his hair. Something got through to him. At least that’s what I convinced myself for my own sanity. “I’ve been honest with you about what I am the entire time I’ve been with you. But I need this guy, Holly. Let me use him. I’m trying to rebuild a clan. I don’t have a lot of options right now.”
“There is no way you can fuck him as badly as he fucked me unless you destroy him,” I growled and headed back to the hotel, trailing flames behind me. Blade caught me, and the oxygen moved too fast. We ignited in the middle of the parking lot.
A tourist screamed from the next aisle over. A small crowd gathered.
“That’s Holly Octane!” one of them exclaimed. “And she’s really on fire!”
Cameras flashed, and once again, I was left completely exposed by Noah.
“Go away,” Blade roared, fire spilling from his mouth like a dragon. The crowd cowered, screaming as they ran back into Circus Circus.
I latched on to Blade, embracing the rage. I let myself go back to that horrible night. I wanted Blade to experience it through my eyes. Noah pinning me down so I couldn’t move, ripping my clothes from my body. Laughing at me as I tried to fight him. Telling me I didn’t know what I wanted.
He was wrong. I knew exactly what I wanted. I wanted to see Noah burn. The same way I did when he forced himself inside me. I wanted his bones to be nothing but a puddle of marrow at my feet.
The flames died down, but Blade and I still held each other, charred and bare in the middle of the parking lot.
“You want to destroy your ex because you didn’t want to be a vampire.” My voice was hoarse. “I didn’t want that, Blade. I died that night, too.”
He wouldn’t look at me. Now he knew what it meant to be dominated. “I’m so sorry, Holly.”
I covered my body with my hands. I revealed enough of myself for one night. “So am I.”
WHOEVER PICKED THE sacrifice tonight made a horrible choice. She wasn’t going down without a fight. She squirmed under the guard’s hold, punching and twisting to get away from him. Cash grinned, all the better when he dominated her. She fell into the puddle of Sally’s blood. The more she screamed, the louder the crowd cheered.
“Take her! Take her!” they chanted.
Cash whispered in her ear. Most of the victims went practically catatonic from the sound of his voice, but that didn’t work right away, either. Finally, she accepted her fate and nodded. She stood and stepped toward him. I wanted so badly for her to run. He stripped her to the waist, one of his arms at her hips, the other on her jaw. She jerked her chin, then
froze. I thought I was going to pass out when a bone in her neck crack. The girl stilled, and Cash’s eyes grew wide before he sunk his fangs into her flesh. When he sucked the last of her life from her, she fell at his feet in a heap, and Sally slid down the silks. Another night at Cirque Macabre.
I hid backstage after I cleaned up from my encounter with Blade, avoiding Lennon. I hadn’t expected her to bring a friend tonight. A young girl with tanned skin and wild honey blonde curls caught back in a barrette. This was the first time I’d seen her in person, but I knew right away she was a vampire. Not just any vampire, in ripped jeans and a fringed kimono—she was Blade’s ex. The Mistress of the Las Vegas clan. The eye of his hurricane. If I could be thankful for anything after our fight, it was that he wasn’t here to run into her. One person dying a night in this theater was plenty for me.
A curtain shielded me from their sight. The vampire, Callie, tugged at Lennon’s arm in panic, pointing at the stage. I couldn’t hear what she said, but I could read her lips well enough to make out the word dead. Lennon looked back at her and shrugged, like she was high as a kite. Cash made sure of that. Her friend’s frustration grew, and she chased after the guards who carried the girl’s limp body backstage.
Callie wrestled the girl’s body away from the guard, then sliced her wrist open, positioning it over the unconscious girl’s mouth.
Lennon’s heels clicked down the hall. “What are you doing?” She gasped when she saw the blood pool on the Callie’s arm.
“Callie, no!” Cash roared. He appeared behind Lennon. Callie met Cash’s glare with one of her own, accepting his challenge. For a little thing who’d only been a vampire for a couple of months, she showed absolutely no fear. She was prepared to do what no one else had. Fight for what she thought was right.
No wonder Blade wanted to destroy her. There was no chance of dominating her.
The Fire Dancer Page 12
