She nodded. “I adore her. She was the role model my mother should have been. Don’t get me wrong, I loved my mom, and I miss her every day. And I know she protected me, but she didn’t stand up for herself. If not for Melissa, would I have learned to value myself? To not put stock in the belittling words I grew up around? I’m not so sure.”
His stomach churning, Ian reached for her shaking hands, covering them with his own. “You’re strong, Riley. I saw that in you from the first day we met.”
She smiled at that. “I like to think so.”
“Did he ever hit Melissa?” Ian asked.
She shook her head. “They fought often and loudly but…he just seemed to keep himself in check somehow. I think he knew Melissa would go to the cops.”
“Your mom never did?” he asked, but he already knew the answer.
“I begged her, but…no. She wouldn’t.”
“So what happened?” Because something had tipped the precarious balance. That much was obvious.
“Alcohol happened,” Riley said in a disgusted voice. “He was always a heavy drinker, but living with Melissa, suppressing his rage, it got worse. And one night, Melissa was working the late shift. He expected me to have his dinner on the table. Not only didn’t I do it, but I talked back and…he slapped me. Hard across the face.”
A building fury like he’d never felt before filled Ian, making him want to lash out. But his more rational self understood that anger was the last thing Riley needed to see, and he clamped down on his simmering emotions.
“Whenever you’re ready,” he said in a gentle voice he barely recognized.
She nodded. “I tried, but I couldn’t hide the red mark on my face. The next day, Alex saw, and he went berserk. Part of me was surprised he took it so badly. I mean, in my mind, a slap was nothing compared to what he’d done to my mother, though I hid that from Alex as much as I could. Looking back, I thought I was getting off lightly, but Alex was furious.”
“Good for him,” Ian muttered.
“He cornered my father. He had his hand around his throat, literally cutting off his air supply. He told my father that if he ever touched me again, he was a dead man.”
Ian closed his eyes, grateful to the half sibling he’d never bothered to get to know. The man he was irrationally jealous of.
Riley’s harsh laugh recaptured Ian’s attention. “My father threatened to go to the cops. Can you imagine the irony? Alex told him to go right ahead. Then he followed up his words with a knee to my father’s groin and warned him that was just a preview. He said I was off-limits, and he dragged me out of there.”
She shook her head, obviously lost in the memory. “I know my father believed his threats, because at seventeen, Alex was massively huge from working out for football.”
“What happened next?” Ian asked.
“I called Melissa at work; she came home immediately. She refused to stay with him after that. Alex stood watch while we packed. Melissa told my father I’d be living with her until I was eighteen and if he had a problem with it, to take her to court. With Alex looming over him, he backed off. That was the last night I saw him or heard from him until I got back from Arizona.”
Ian narrowed his gaze. “Which brings us to now.”
She nodded. “There have been hang-ups on my home answering machine. I never thought it was my father. Then I returned to work to find out he’d left a message while I was away. He said I owed him. And then Friday night, after I got home from shopping, the phone rang, and the person was breathing into my ear. I hung up, and the phone rang again. I answered it yelling, and it was Alex. He wanted to know what was going on. I said it was nothing. He didn’t believe me…so I told him.”
“Why didn’t you call me? Why didn’t you trust me enough to let me in before now?”
He forced himself to remain calm, not to yell or show her just how frustrated and angry he really was. Not now, when he finally realized that if he flipped out in any way, he could very likely lose her for good.
“It wasn’t a question of whether or not I trusted you, it was humiliating, admitting I grew up that way. Besides, I’d put him so firmly in my past, I never thought about him, talked about him, or wanted to revisit those days.” She glanced away.
Once again, he gently redirected her with a touch of his hand. He wanted them communicating, not shutting each other out.
“Do you think I want to deal with my family history? But it’s between us, thanks to Alex. I’m trying with him. Because of you.”
If he was going to make that kind of effort, he needed to know she’d reciprocate in kind.
“What do you want me to say? I should have told you, and I didn’t.”
“Because you have trust issues.” And here, he’d thought those issues were all his.
She blinked in surprise. “I suppose I do.”
Part of him understood, as he was still working through his own. Another part wanted her to know she belonged to him. That she could come to him with anything, would come to him first, and know he’d give her everything she needed.
Him.
No one else.
TWELVE
Ian stood with Riley in his living room, the night sky sparkling with stars visible through the large windows. Her revelations about her childhood had humbled him. She was stronger than he’d given her credit for, her relationship with his half brother something he understood much better now.
But that understanding didn’t calm his racing heart. And he couldn’t help the irrational fear that Alex would always come first for her. Irrational because she hadn’t decided to tell Alex about her father before Ian. The timing of the other man’s phone call had dictated that choice. And irrational because his jealousy over what she’d told Alex, and when, was based on the insecurities of the child Ian had been, not the man he was now. At least, that’s how he should be viewing things.
His mother had begged him to let the past go. If there was ever a time to do that, it was now. The question was whether he could.
“Ian?” Riley asked in a soft voice.
He turned toward her.
She stood in her bare feet, her hair tumbling over her shoulders, her eyes wide and more vulnerable than he’d ever seen them.
She reached for his arm. “I’m sorry I kept you in the dark.”
“I know.”
“So you’re not angry?”
He shook his head. “No, angry wouldn’t be the word I’d use.”
“Hurt?” she asked.
“I was.” He pulled his tie off and held it in one hand. The desire to drag her into the bedroom and tether her to his headboard was strong.
She bit her lower lip. “And now you’re not?”
“Now I understand you better. Which was all I ever wanted. To understand what bound you and Alex beyond basic friendship.”
She swallowed hard, the soft lines of her throat moving up and down. “And now that you know?”
He walked over to her. “Now, you and I are going to come to an understanding.”
“I don’t want to lose you,” she said before he could elaborate.
“That’s not what I want either.” In fact, he wanted her bound to his bed, where he’d know she belonged to him, he thought, winding the tie around one hand.
But then he wouldn’t know she was there willingly. Olivia’s words came back to him. His sisters and his mother all put up with his over-the-top behavior because they were related. They had to, as Olivia had so kindly pointed out. But she was right. If Ian wanted Riley to trust in him enough to come to him first, he needed to extend that same faith.
That didn’t come easily to him at all.
“So what now?” she asked.
Now he proved to her he was worthy of any leap of faith he wanted her to make. “I can handle your friendship with Alex. It’s an important part of who you are, and I wouldn’t ask you to give that up.”
She blinked, her eyes filling with tears. “Thank you.”
�
�But…you either trust me or you don’t. You either instinctively come to me first or there is no us. On that, I can’t compromise.” And he didn’t know if she could give in on this point that meant everything to him.
“Done.”
He blinked.
She wrapped her arms around his neck and held on tightly, sealing her lips against his. Stunned, he couldn’t move. Hell, he wasn’t sure he’d even heard her correctly.
She tipped her head and looked into his eyes. “First, last, always, Ian.”
He let the tie drop to the floor and released a long, relieved breath.
“Mine,” he said, lifting her beneath her arms so she could jump up and wrap her legs around him and hold on as he walked them into the bedroom.
He slid her to the floor by the side of the bed. “Turn around,” he said in a gruff voice he barely recognized.
She did as he asked, lifting her hair out of the way. He unzipped the gown, sliding the garment off one shoulder and letting the material pool at her feet. The sexy, strapless bra came next, and he kissed the marks left by the confining material, sliding his tongue over her soft skin, working his way down one vertebra at a time.
She trembled but remained in place as his lips hit the sweet spot at the base of her spine, just above the silken thong that settled between her cheeks. He squeezed each round globe, kissing her there, too, before gliding the panties down her long legs.
He rose and splayed his hand across her stomach, his fingertips dipping downward, toward her sex. “Mine,” he said once more before spinning her back to face him.
Her eyes were dilated, her cheeks flushed, and she’d pulled her plump bottom lip between her teeth.
“You make me want,” she whispered. “You make me believe.”
She didn’t need to explain. She did the same thing for him.
Before Riley, he didn’t believe in romance, relationships, women, or love. He shuddered at the word that danced around his head, tempting him with something he’d long since thought impossible. Yet she was here, by choice. Not running when she knew exactly how demanding he could be.
He cupped her face with both hands and kissed her, taking his time, stroking her lips with his tongue and reveling in her sweet taste. Not demanding anything she didn’t willingly give. Instead, he was kissing her as if they had all the time in the world.
He thought of the tie on the floor of the living room. With one choice word, he could have her splayed before him on the bed, acceding to his every command. Lifting his head, he looked down at her. Blue eyes wide, lips well kissed, her breathing ragged, she waited for him to take the lead.
He traced the line of the chain and diamond drop hanging from her delicate neck, and her nipples puckered at his touch. He could have her on her back, hands gripping the headboard as he fucked her wearing nothing but his necklace.
He could. But that wasn’t what he wanted from her.
He shed his jacket then unbuttoned his shirt and dropped it to the floor. She reached out a hesitant hand, placing her palm over his heart. In that instant, he accepted that she owned him. He didn’t want to fuck her into submission, he wanted to make love to her. It seemed there were still firsts for him, after all.
With none-too-steady hands, he unbuttoned his pants and slid off his trousers and briefs, ridding himself of those as well. Then he lifted her up and dropped her in the center of the bed, coming down on top of her, his body aligning with hers.
He braced his hands on either side of her head. “I don’t want anything between us. I want to feel all of you when I slide inside your slick heat.”
Her eyes dilated at his graphic words.
“I’m on the pill, but I never have sex without protection,” she said.
He was disappointed, but he understood and reached for the nightstand drawer.
“I meant, I’ve never had sex without it before.”
Her words stopped his forward movement, and he came back to her, resuming his earlier position, his thick cock gliding over her feminine heat.
“I’m safe,” she continued. “And I know you wouldn’t be asking if you had any doubts about yourself.”
“I would never put you at risk.”
She nodded. “Then I don’t want anything between us either.”
He released a long-held breath. She’d given him a gift he didn’t take lightly. “I’ve never not used one before either,” he assured her.
“I know, Mr. Always in Control.” She grinned, her pretty blue eyes glittering with laughter.
“Minx.”
She wound her arms around him. “Your minx.”
He groaned at her words, raised himself up, settling his erection at her entrance. He watched her expression as he eased inside her by increments, not wanting to miss out on one second of this first time. As her body opened, accepting his thick length, taking him in, wet heat slowly enveloped him.
“Oh, Ian, I feel you,” she murmured in awe.
“I feel you too, baby.” And he hadn’t been prepared for the emotions flooding through him.
Oh hell, now he knew why they called it making love, he thought, gliding all the way home. So damned good, he thought, his entire body in sensory overload.
Her body clasped him tight, gripping him and connecting them body, heart, and soul. His heart slammed harder inside his chest, beating out a rapid rhythm, screaming ownership and possession of this woman who’d been different from the very first. He stilled, giving himself a second to catch his breath and calm the fuck down. If there’d been any lingering doubts or question of the depth of feelings she inspired, they were gone with this one act.
Before she questioned him, he collected his thoughts and began to move, gliding in and out of her slick sheath. She bent her knees and raised her hips, encouraging him, giving him more depth for each thrust. He picked up rhythm, and she moaned, arching into him each time he drove harder inside her.
Their bodies already had their own rhythm, but skin to skin, everything was elevated, bigger, more, including her cries of pleasure. Faster, harder. He broke into a sweat, braced his arms, and powered into her.
“Yes. Oh God, right there.” She arched again, and he made sure the head of his cock hit the same spot inside her.
“Come, baby. I’ve got you.”
Her body stilled and clenched, and she convulsed around him, crying out with each pump of his cock.
“Ian!” She screamed his name, triggering his own hard, fast release.
He came, spilling himself into her, opening his heart and gutting him at the same time.
* * *
Riley woke up because her stomach was grumbling. She rolled to find Ian watching her in amusement, his lips twitching with a grin.
“Something funny?” she asked.
“I like watching you sleep. Listening to you? Not so much.”
She punched him in the arm. “You made me leave the party before dinner,” she reminded him. “I’m starving. And craving ice cream.”
He rolled his eyes and laughed. “Luckily for you, I keep a stocked freezer for the girls. My sisters,” he added quickly when she raised her eyebrows in question.
“Feed me?” she asked.
He leaned over and kissed her hard on the lips. “Only because you asked so nicely.”
He slid out of bed, perfectly comfortable in his nudity, and headed for the kitchen, returning with a large tub of ice cream and one spoon. “Hope you like chocolate swirl.”
“Mmm. Works for me.” She scooted back in the bed, sitting up as he turned on the bedside lamp and settled in beside her.
“You’re not having any?” she asked, holding out her hand for the spoon.
He shook his head and laughed. “We’re sharing.”
“You’re a mean man, making me share my ice cream.”
Ignoring her complaint, he popped off the top and placed it on the nightstand before settling in beside her. He dug into the tub and held out the spoon for her to eat.
He fed her
, alternating one for him and one for her until they’d had their fill. This was the most relaxed she’d ever seen him, and she understood that something had changed tonight.
Not something, she thought. Everything.
It was as if once she’d verbally committed to him, the walls he’d kept between them had crumbled. Her heart swelled with emotion and the knowledge that somehow she’d captured this man for her own.
The rest of the night continued the same way, with them holed up in his apartment, sharing food, making love, and shutting out the outside world.
Until Sunday morning, when Ian went downstairs and returned with the morning paper. He drank orange juice; she sipped her coffee. She was looking into the back of the sports section that completely covered his face from hers.
“So this is how it’s going to be now? You ignoring me for the morning paper? That didn’t take long,” she joked, reaching for another section of the paper to keep her busy while he read.
“This from the woman who can spend half an hour looking through the apps on her phone?” he asked lightly.
She grinned, still enjoying this lighter, happier Ian.
She flipped through the lifestyle section, pausing at a black-and-white photograph. “It’s us!”
The picture had been taken as they exited the limo, Ian obviously holding her protectively. She smiled at the stern expression on his face.
“You’re not upset this time?” he asked.
She shook her head. “It’s not like everyone doesn’t know about us now.”
She’d called Alex earlier this morning, as promised, and assured him that Ian wasn’t upset, things were good, and he no longer had to worry about her. Ian had been by her side, and she’d chosen her words deliberately, wanting him to know she meant what she’d promised him.
He would come first.
Her cell rang, and she glanced down. “Alex,” she murmured.
Ian met her gaze, his expression bland. Whether it was a controlled look or not, she appreciated how hard he was trying.
“I’m sure my sisters will be next once they’ve seen the paper. They love gossip,” he muttered.
Dare to Love Page 14
