Take the Leap
Page 12
“So, you’ll call me?” The woman, Natalia, flashed me a dazzling, expensive smile as she handed me her card. I took it and nodded.
“Thank you so much,” I bowed my head. “We really appreciate this. And yes, I’ll call you.”
She shot a look over at Dina, who beamed at her, and turned on her heel and marched off. I could tell that she was hoping that I might offer something a little more, but Dina was my protection against that. Not that I had any interest in anyone or anything but her now that we had the investor thing covered. Dina turned to me, raised her glass and clinked it against mine.
“I have never seen as much hardcore talking up as I did there,” she nodded after Natalia. “That was…genuinely pretty amazing.”
“Why, thank you,” I cocked my head in faux-modesty. “I think I’ve had enough practice trying to sell myself to know how to do it well.”
“I’m very impressed,” she giggled, glancing around. She’d had a couple of glasses of champagne, and I wasn’t sure if it was just the enormity of the event that had her giddy or the booze. Maybe both. Either way, it was awesome to see her off-set and bouncing with excitement, relaxed and laid-back where I usually saw her ducking in front of the cameras to re-apply mascara or bronzer. Something about being here, almost like an actual couple, lent the night a promise that hadn’t been there before.
“You want to get another drink, to celebrate?” She nodded towards the bar. “I know we’ve got to be on set tomorrow, but…”
“Hell, yes,” I agreed, and placed my hand lightly on the small of her back as we made our way through the crowd. The whole night through I had noticed people eyeing us, and it was clear that they were trying to figure out who she was. I didn’t usually go out with women, choosing instead to hit it stag or take a friend, and I had no doubt that as soon as I got home there would be a number of sly cell-phone pictures of the two of us together, with speculation on who she was and what we were doing together. Well, let them – I was proud to be seen with Dina. Something about her made my stomach sparkle with excitement.
We went to the bar and picked up another glass of champagne apiece, and then made our way to the enormous balcony which had once been reserved for only the richest upper-classes who could afford something as glamorous as that.
Now, it looked out over the empty stage, most of which was draped with enormous, blown-up posters of shows that had once been put on there. Dina stood there in silence, surveying the place for a moment, and shook her head.
“And this is just how you live your life, all the time?” She turned to me. I shrugged.
“I guess so,” I admitted. “You kind of get used to it.”
“I hope I never do,” she sighed. “Not that I think I’m going to be doing this many times again.”
“Hey, you never know,” I shrugged. “What kind of parties do make-up artists throw?”
“Uh, mostly ones involving bring-your-own-bottles of wine in someone’s living room,” she shot back, looking at me with incredulity. “Nothing like this, that’s for sure.”
“Maybe I’ll just have to keep taking you until you get bored of it,” I shot back, knowing that I was getting into dangerously flirtatious territory. She looked back at me, observing me with an expression that I had no idea how to read. It could have been an encouragement to go further, or could have been a warning to stop. Only one way to find out.
“I’ve had a really good time tonight,” I remarked softly, shifting closer to her as we both rested our arms on the railing in front of us. She moved her weight from one leg to the other, closing the distance between us even further than before.
“Me too,” she replied, her voice as low as mine. She looked up into my eyes, and there was a gentleness to the way she spoke that told me she was ready for this. I slipped an arm around her waist as casually as I could, drawing her nearer, letting my gaze fall to her mouth once more. My heart was hammering with anticipation, so ready for what was going to come next.
I had spent all of the last week thinking about her, remembering the way her lips felt against mine and how supple and soft her body was under my hands. I could already feel something stirring between my legs, before our lips had so much as touched. And then, slowly, agonizingly slowly, she leaned towards me and pressed her mouth to mine.
I had never felt a kiss like it in my life. Even the encounter we’d shared back at my trailer the week before had been nothing like this – that had been heavy with undisclosed desire, the passion between us fresh and new and curious. But this, this was just an acknowledgement, an acceptance of everything that had gone down between us, and an understanding that it was real.
I lifted my hand to her face, brushing my thumb over her velvety cheek and kissing her harder. She let out the smallest moan, the sound sending vibrations through my entire body and making me shiver. I pulled her closer, forgetting for a moment where we were, not caring for a second if someone walked in, not giving a shit what would happen if someone caught us and what they would make of our relationship.
For the first time since I came up in this industry, I wasn’t thinking about gossip bloggers or fans or what people would think of me. I was only thinking about her. Dina. Her name felt like a charm in my head, and I smiled into the kiss, my thumb caressing her waist as we lost ourselves to each other.
And then, of course, the door opened behind me.
Chapter Nine
Dina
We sprang back from each other at once, so quickly that I almost dropped my glass of champagne in the process. I didn’t recognize the person standing in the door, but it didn’t matter – they looked as though they’d just observed the most exciting thing they had ever seen in their lives. And, if they were anywhere near the gossip industry, they probably had. I didn’t dare look up at Will now that the moment was gone – I couldn’t believe that I’d allowed myself to get all swept along with it like that. After all I had told myself, everything I had promised, and now this.
“Sorry, sorry,” the man who had entered backed away as quickly as he’d come in, leaving us alone to deal with what had just happened.
“Uh…” Will turned to me, uncharacteristically quiet compared to how he usually was. It was like he couldn’t find the words to explain what had happened, and I knew precisely how he felt.
He moved back towards me, and every fiber of my being wanted to go along with it. But this wasn’t right. I couldn’t handle the way that people had looked at me all night – the knowledge that me, my dress, my attitude, would be analyzed by thousands of die-hard fangirls by the time I got my shoes off that evening. The thought of all of it was just…too much. I probably should have turned this down in the first place, but I couldn’t resist the chance to see how things worked out between us. I couldn’t play that game again. Leading him on was unfair, and I could see from the look in his eyes that he wanted me, maybe even more than I wanted him.
I held my hand up and placed it against his chest, stilling him in his tracks. He covered my hand with his, and pulled my knuckles up to his mouth, brushing his lips along them gently and looking at me with an expression that told me how badly he wanted this, wanted me. I frowned, brow furrowing as I tried to remind myself of what I had been so sure of just a second before. His lips were soft on my skin, his mouth warm and tempting and practically begging for more. I pulled my hand away, a Herculean effort, and shifted so that I was looking back out over the railing once more.
“Is everything okay?” he asked, and I nodded, not sure I could actually speak without coming out with anything that was complete garbage. He leaned over, and I could tell that this was his last-gasp attempt to get me alone with him. I couldn’t blame him if he felt even a crumb of the chemistry that I felt, he would have been stupid not to pursue it with every fiber of his being.
“You want to come back to my place?” He flashed me an oh-so-tempting grin. “Leave these guys behind. They’re boring the shit out of me now, anyway.”
Finally, I tur
ned to him, looking him in the eyes and knowing that I had to deliver this next part with sincerity. I pulled up every bit of acting talent I had in me, all the stuff I’d picked up from working on movies for so long, and let out a long sigh.
“Will, it’s not…” I trailed off, the words stalling in my mouth almost instantly. “I like you. I do. I just think that I need some time…”
He held his hands up, not wanting to push me.
“Anything you need,” he replied reassuringly, reaching out to lightly touch my waist. I couldn’t help but smile. Who would have thought that a guy with a playboy reputation as intense as Will Derry’s would have proved to be such a gentleman in the face of rejection?
“Thank you,” I bowed my head, and felt a flush of nervousness ricochet through me. Why did I still feel the sweat in my palms, the blood thrumming in my head? I needed to get my shit together, to force all these thoughts of dragging him back to my place out of my brain, once and for all. I grabbed my champagne and drained it, and instantly realized that booze probably wasn’t the answer here, as I looked at him with a renewed sense of looseness. Shaking my head, I turned away.
“I should get going,” I announced to no-one in particular, and walked as quickly as my killer heels would allow away from Will and into the buzzy, social atmosphere of the party that was still taking place next door. Brushing straight through the crowd and towards the door, I thanked God for my complete anonymity without Will next to me.
No heads turned, nobody glanced in my direction – there wasn’t an ounce of attention paid to me as I made my escape, and thank God for that, because otherwise I might have had to explain to someone why I was leaving one of the hottest, most charming men in the world to spend the rest of the evening stag.
I dumped my glass on the bar as I went by and hurried for the door, flagging down a cab outside and hearing the flurry of clicks of cameras as the paparazzi waiting outside for a scoop mistook me for someone who actually mattered. I slipped into the back seat, gave the driver the address of my apartment, and leaned my head back against the leather, heart thumping in my chest. I had to stop doing that. I seriously had to stop doing that.
Because it felt as though I had escaped some inevitable doom – not that going to be with Will would be anything close to bad, but because I knew I shouldn’t do it. I knew I’d regret it if I ended up spending a night with him, because he was the kind of guy every woman wanted something to do with, and the kind who would never be able to resist the lure of something or someone new.
And I was…I was starting to feel something for him. Not a lot, not love, but more than lust, more than just attraction. Watching the way he had worked the room, the way he had gone from struggling with an investor down to soaring with a socialite on his team, was incredible. He was passionate, intelligent, talented – in almost any other situation, I’d be throwing myself at him, but something was holding me back and I couldn’t put my finger on precisely what it was.
Fear of being hurt? Worry about our affair affecting my place on set? Panic that the industry wouldn’t take me seriously if it found out that I’d been running around with a movie star? So many times, back home, people would make cracks about me getting into this job so I could get my hands on any number of sexy men who populated the industry; the last thing I needed was to prove them right by hooking up with the most high-profile one.
I arrived back at my apartment, pulled off my shoes, and carefully hung up the dress to deliver back to Irina first thing tomorrow. I wasn’t sure whether it was the champagne or Will that was making me feel as giddy as I was, but a combination of the two had me practically bouncing off the walls as I tried to get ready for bed. How was I meant to sleep when I knew I could have been sleeping with him? I could have woken up next to him, strolled around in one of his shirts, made him breakfast…
And then what? A little voice in my head added the last part. I’d get to play house, but after that, where did we go? Back to set, where everyone would know what had happened between us? Or would he kick me out, embarrassed to be seen with me now that his conquest was won? Was he only chasing me as hard as he was because he was used to getting everything he wanted and was thrown by the fact that I didn’t seem all that interested in him, or that I blew hot and cold seemingly at random?
I flopped back into bed and stared up at the ceiling. Why was I getting so up in my own head about this? Ninety-nine percent of the time, I was pretty cool about dating – I didn’t really give much of a damn one way or the other how things turned out, as long as I was happy. But for some reason, Will Derry had me running circles in the dirt, trying to figure out what I actually wanted.
When it came down to it, I just couldn’t handle the scrutiny. Even the way people had looked at me when I was at that gala was enough to tell me that being out with Will made me a person of interest in a way that I’d never been before in my life, and I kind of hated that level of attention. What was I meant to do with it, the knowledge that everyone in the room likely wanted to take me aside and ask me how in the hell a chick like me had landed one of the hottest men on the planet?
I flipped on to my side, the night already tinged by my panicked overthinking, and closed my eyes. How many days of shooting left? Twenty? Thirty? It wasn’t all that long to wait, and I was a grown-ass adult who didn’t have to throw herself head-first at every guy she thought was cute. As I drifted off to sleep, I felt a new surge of resolve. Yes, I would stick to my guns and keep Will at arm’s length. I could do it. It’d be easy now that I had made the decision. And I managed to stick to my guns – well, until the night two weeks later.
Chapter Ten
Will
Two weeks had passed since I managed to land that new investor, and the movie had been ticking along at a decent pace since then – it had been hard work keeping her on board, especially when I made it clear that nothing was going to happen between us, but she had wired us the money and given us the opportunity to actually finish making this damn film.
“I really like the way this is framed,” Derrick remarked, gesturing to one of the feeds as our leading man leaned up against a table in the center of the set. I grinned at him.
“You think? Maybe I’ve got an aptitude for this after all,” I teased, and he rolled his eyes at me playfully.
“Don’t get too cocky,” he warned.
It had been rough at the start, but the two of us were actually starting to get along pretty well as filming drew to a close. I couldn’t believe it had been three weeks already, with only about a week to go till we were done. At this point, we were really just going over shots we’d done, hinting at themes that had emerged over the course of filming that hadn’t been obvious before. I loved the way the movie was coming together, loved how gorgeous it was turning out to be, and prayed to fucking Christ that the investors and everyone else who’d thrown their weight behind it felt the same way.
“So, what do you want to do for the closing scene? Have you given it any thought?” Derrick asked, but I was distracted by the sight of Dina wandering on to the set to touch up some make-up. My God, that woman…
Ever since she had run out on me at the fundraiser, I had assumed that anything that might have been between us was firmly and thoroughly dead in the water. I’d never been stood up like in my life – well, since I got famous, anyway – and I had to admit it had me even more intrigued about her and what kind of woman she was and why she seemed so happy to kiss me but so reluctant to take things further.
Not to mention the fact that, fucking hell, she always seemed to know exactly when to saunter out in front of me to completely rip my mind away from whatever I was meant to be focusing on at the time. This particular afternoon, she had scraped her hair back into a high ponytail that bounced around with a lively jolt with every step, along with loose jeans that showed off a thick strip of skin. She had to keep hitching them up, looping her small fingers through the belt loops and drawing attention to the way the pants hung off her hips del
icately. I wanted to touch her so bad that sometimes I felt as though my fingers itched with the need of it. I forced myself to turn my attention back to Derrick, focusing, as I was meant to, in the moment.
“Yeah, you know, I really haven’t given it much thought,” I admitted. “Maybe we could take some time out to think about it later?”
Derrick followed my gaze to Dina, and then looked back at me slowly with his eyebrows raised.
“Something happening there I should know about?” he asked, cocking his head. Shit, was I really being that obvious about it? I shook my head.
“Nothing’s going on between us,” I replied truthfully. Derrick eyed me with suspicion, but shrugged.
“Whatever,” he yawned. I knew he didn’t give a shit about any of it unless it was getting in the way of the movie, and I was doing a fine job keeping my eye on the ball. Well, most of the time.
“I think we’re going to have to stay late today,” Derrick nudged me. “This scene, I want natural, dark light. I think it’d work best.”
“Whatever you say,” I agreed. “Should we let the crew know?”
“We’ll only need a skeleton crew,” he nodded. “But yeah, it’ll probably be much later tonight when the light fades entirely.”
“I’ll get it under control,” I replied as I got out of my seat to wander around and tell everyone what was going to happen this evening. I got on better with the crew and the cast than Derrick did – as a guy who’d only really been a director, he didn’t have that great a grasp on how to handle the day-to-day compared to me. In fact, I quite enjoyed being back in the swing of things, hanging out with everyone like I was a real person as opposed to some celebrity who had to be sequestered away at every turn.