by D. J. Manly
Published by Mojocastle Press, LLC
Price, Utah
This book is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual events, locales or persons, living or dead, is completely coincidental.
The Russos: Episode Eleven
ISBN: 1-60180-085-1
Copyright © 2008 D. J. Manly
Cover Art Copyright @ 2008 April Martinez
All rights reserved.
Excluding legitimate review sites and review publications, the reproduction or utilization of this work in whole or in part in any form by any electronic, mechanical or other means, now known or hereafter invented, is forbidden without the written permission of the publisher.
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Also By D.J. Manly:
Connor's Storm
Melting Ice
Melting Ice 2
The Russos: Digital Soap
Dedication:
To my readers.
The Russos:
Episode Eleven
D. J. Manly
Previously on The Russos...
Drake and Johnny argue over their sons. Tony races after Angelo, trying to catch him before he leaves to go back out on the road again. The Russos attend the music awards and Drake drops a bombshell. Tony and Angelo make love, but then Tony blows it.
And Now...Episode Eleven of The Russos
Drake was not in a good mood. He'd had a huge fight with Johnny before they had left for New York. Tensions were running high. No one wanted to be the first to go into the dressing room and talk to Drake. Mac and Pepi sat in one of the lounges off stage, neither one of them talking. They were all feeling it, especially Tony, who had already thrown up three times. "I can't do this," he said to himself in the mirror for the fiftieth time. "I can't fucking do this."
"Well, if you say it enough, you'll make it true," a deep voice said suddenly from behind him.
Tony glanced up in the mirror to see Angelo standing there. His heart pounded in his chest and he smiled. Angelo, he mouthed, then turned around and threw himself into his arms, practically mowing him over.
"Whoa, whoa," Angelo laughed, reaching out and placing his hand on the wall behind him to steady himself. "Easy."
Tony held onto him tight, closing his eyes. "You came back. Thank you. Thank God, because I need you. We all need you." He forced himself to back away. "Your dad went into the dressing room two hours ago and hasn't come out."
Angelo nodded. "Is he all right?"
"No. He and Dad had a huge fight before he left."
"Over what?"
"I don't know," Tony shook his head. "I missed most of it. I was outside in the pool. When I came in, I heard Dad say something about Drake not understanding, and Drake accused Dad of being selfish. That's all I know."
Angelo sighed. "And you?"
"Terrified."
Angelo laughed. "It's natural. You'll be all right."
"I need you to hold my hand out there."
"Might be a little awkward," he grinned. "Where are Uncle Pepi and Mac?"
"Somewhere down the hall, hiding from Drake. Your mom is here somewhere."
"I know, I saw her already. Well," he heaved a big sigh, "I'm ready to move into the battle zone."
Tony nodded. "You want me to come with you?"
Angelo shook his head.
"I'll just stay in here and puke some more."
Angelo laughed and slapped his shoulder. "You'll do okay. And worse comes to worse, picture them all naked."
"Are you going to be in the front row? I have no problem picturing you naked."
Angelo smiled and left the bathroom.
* * * * * *
When the door opened, Drake looked up from where he sat in front of the mirror, prepared to tell whoever it was to leave him the fuck alone. When he saw his son, he managed to smile. "What are you doing here?"
"Is that any way to greet your number one son?"
Drake stood up and gave him a hug. "I mean, it's great to see you, but I thought you were---"
"I cancelled a concert, caught some shit for it, but nothing that won't blow over. I figured you could use the moral support."
"You figured right." Drake walked back over to the chair in front of the mirror and sat down again.
"Are you auditioning for the role of Dorian Grey?"
Drake laughed sharply. "No. I'm brooding."
"Um. I remember you doing that. I would think you would outgrow it." He came over and perched on the edge of the vanity table.
"When did you get to be so cheeky?"
"I had you as a role model, remember?"
"Oh, yeah, sorry."
Angelo studied him. "You look tired. Have you been sleeping?"
"Not a lot."
"What was the fuss about with Uncle Johnny?"
"Tony told you, I suppose."
"He mentioned something."
"Don't fall in love."
"That's easy advice to follow. Thanks, Dad."
Drake looked at him. His son, so handsome, so grown up... God, had he equipped him for life, for heartache? If only he could wrap him in a cocoon that would keep him safe from hurt. "You're telling me."
"How is Uncle Johnny?"
Drake sighed. "Dying."
"He has a few years left...I mean, if..."
"Dying inside." Drake lowered his head.
"Everything he had is gone. You know what he said to me before I left?"
Angelo shook his head.
"He wants to die."
"He doesn't mean that."
"Yes, he does. He can't perform anymore, Angelo. He can't see. It's pathetic to see him. He won't let me help him. He won't let anyone help him." He lowered his voice. "He won't let me touch him anymore."
"He's not well, he---"
"He won't let me sleep beside him at night. I'd be happy to do that, just lie next to him, but..." Drake looked at his son, his eyes filling with tears. "He says I should take a lover."
Angelo reached out and squeezed his dad's arm.
"He'll come around. He's adjusting, that's all. It must have been hard for him to see you go and---"
"That's why I didn't want this," Drake growled.
He stood up and knocked the chair on its side. "I didn't want to perform without him. I knew how much it would hurt him." Drake was breathing hard, pacing the floor. "I should be there with him now, not here. I begged Frank to...he wouldn't let me. The fucking money is all he cares about. After all I've done for him..." He stopped, looked at Angelo. "I'm sorry."
"About what exactly?"
"Laying this all on you."
Angelo shrugged. "I have broad shoulders."
Drake smiled and walked over to embrace his son.
"That you do," he said, kissing his cheek. "That you do."
When he released him, Angelo said, "Tony is barfing in the can."
Drake actually laughed. "His father used to do the same thing. It passes."
"I'm going to see Mac and Pepi."
Drake nodded. "Tell them not to worry. I'll be ready."
"You were born ready." Angelo smirked and left the dressing room.
He was in a dark place, and he knew it was bad this time. He'd been there, deep in despair, longing for his next fix. It was scary. It wasn't even the fact that he could feel this life slipping away from him that hurt so. It was leaving Drake. God, how he loved him. This frightening kind of savage passion left him weak.
Drake didn't understand, of course. His was a deeper, steadier love, compact and noble. Of course, he felt tha
t too, but there was this hunger. It had always been there, a hunger for Drake's body, for his cock, a wild, untamed craving that was always with him, like a constant thirst. He was terrified that he'd never taste him again, never drink him in, feel his cock invade his very soul. It was selfish, petty even, but it was all that mattered to him suddenly. Not the music. He'd always have the music. It was in his head, in his heart, in his memory. He didn't care about the crowd. He never had. It was the making of the music he loved, sharing it with Drake, his brother, his lover, his friend, his very existence.
He regretted what he had said. He had no right to upset Drake the way he had before he left for New York. It had just come out. He hadn't meant it. He didn't want to die. He couldn't leave him, not just yet.
Drake needed him, not his body so much, but his love.
It wasn't that Drake didn't desire him. He did, but his desire rose above pure lust. That's why he was able to sleep beside him and not touch him, but Johnny didn't want it so easy. When Drake walked into the bedroom and took off his clothes, that craving intensified. It was like an inferno inside of him. Even if his body wasn't up to it, the fire raged. It was why he asked him to sleep in another room. He couldn't bear it.
Drake needed someone to love him, someone to make sure that he looked after himself. He was like a little boy in some ways, especially now since he knew he wasn't truly a Russo by blood. There was this insecurity, an ego that needed stroking. And lately it had been Tony, his own son, who'd taken up the task.
Tony had always been drawn to Drake, sexually entranced by him, but that wasn't hard to understand.
If it didn't work out between him and Angelo, there was no reason why Tony couldn't take his place when he was gone. It was inevitable that Tony would find his way to Drake's bed one night. It was only a matter of time. It didn't matter the reason; if it was because Drake looked so much like Angelo, or Tony's resemblance to himself. They'd come to love each other for the right reasons eventually.
Johnny wiped the tears from his face. Bitter. Yes, he felt bitter. Drake was everything and they finally found happiness together, and now his life was coming to an end. He had to make sure that Drake wasn't alone. He couldn't leave until he was sure.
* * * * * *
Tony was a little stunned when the show was over.
He'd made it through and even though the audience was pining for his father, they seemed more accepting in the end. Drake made a point of introducing him as Johnny's son, and this seemed to give the fans some comfort.
Angelo was there to congratulate them all backstage and then announced he needed to get back.
"Get back?" Tony echoed, his heart falling. "Can't you stay tonight and...?"
He shook his head. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't be here now. You did good tonight."
Tony took his arm and pulled him aside. The dressing room was filled with people. It was hard to hear. "What about us?"
"Is there an us?"
Tony met his gaze. "The last time you were home, we---"
"We discussed this, remember?"
Tony swallowed. "What about that guy in...?"
"It's over. I told you it would be. I don't think you're ready for a relationship, and maybe I'm not either."
"So...we fuck when you come home, then we go our separate ways and...?"
Angelo bent his head and kissed his mouth gently.
He smiled at him. "Love who you want, Tony, and I'll do the same, and in the end if we're meant to be...then..." He shrugged.
"You're killing me," Tony whispered. "I don't want anyone but you."
Angelo reached out and touched his cheek. "I have to go."
Tony gulped the hot tears when Angelo withdrew from him. He turned his face to the corner and squeezed his eyes shut. When he turned back around, Angelo was gone. "Poof," Tony whispered to himself.
Drake noticed how miserable Tony looked standing all alone in the corner. He knew why. He broke away from the crowd of people around him and approached him. "Hey."
Tony nodded.
"You okay?"
"Sure." Tony tried to smile.
"I'm going home, taking the private jet. Want to come?"
"Yeah."
"The others are staying, a little New York City holiday."
"Did you call Dad?"
"Yeah. He's calmed down."
"Good. That nurse is with him, right?"
"Yes, but your father is fighting me on that too."
"I'll talk to him."
Drake laughed. "Good luck."
Angelo let his head fall back against the seat on the plane. He hated leaving his family. They needed him now more than ever and here he was, running away.
Maybe if he was back home again he and Tony could spend some time together, and it would be all right.
He loved him. He couldn't help that. And ironically it was the love he felt that kept him away. He couldn't bear to be hurt again like before. His heart wouldn't take it. Tony was too young. Hell, they were both too young to love like this, weren't they?
He had a few months left on his contract and after that he'd go home, and if Tony still wanted him, he'd give it a try. Okay, sounded like a good compromise, but why didn't he feel he always had to test Tony's love? He could lose him. He knew that, he knew that very well.
* * * * * *
The following evening, Tony leaned down and touched his father's hand.
He was sitting on the balcony in a lounge chair.
"Well, if it isn't the big rock star," he smirked.
"How'd it go?"
"Okay. I threw up a lot before."
Johnny chuckled. "You were tired. Did you just wake up?"
"Yes."
"Drake told me you did fine."
"Yeah" Tony said. "Where is he, anyway? I haven't seen him."
"Taking a sauna, I think."
"Oh. Dad, Drake is worried about you. Why did you make him move out of your bedroom?"
"He snores."
"Dad."
Johnny adjusted the dark glasses on his nose. "To give you a chance."
"A...a chance...me...chance for what?"
"If..." He paused. "Do you still want him?"
"Dad, I..." Tony couldn't believe what he was hearing.
"I know you wanted him at one time. Maybe you've outgrown that."
"But Dad, I..."
"He's lonely right now, alone. He has needs and...I can't fulfil them...not that I don't want to."
"Dad, you're talking nonsense. I---"
"Tony," he snapped, "grow up! We're not children here, babies, we're grown men. Angelo is not here and he hasn't promised you anything, has he?"
"No."
"I want to know that Drake is taken care of before..."
"Dad, don't talk like that."
"You're going to need someone too. Think about what I've said."
"I won't. I won't. It's not going to happen."
"What's not going to happen?" Drake said suddenly, walking outside. He was wearing a pair of bathing trunks and a T-shirt.
"Noth...nothing," Tony stammered.
"You and him, together, fucking," Johnny said suddenly, without flinching.
Drake looked at Tony, his eyes widening. "What?"
"Oh, don't sound all outraged," Johnny chastised, "don't tell me the thought hasn't crossed your mind. You're both good-looking men. Drake is really good in bed, Tony. You won't be disappointed. Satisfaction guaranteed."
"Stop this," Drake snapped. "Jesus Christ."
"You're going to need each other. I don't want you to feel guilty about that. I'm giving it my approval."
"Fuck your approval," Drake shouted out. "And fuck you...fuck your talk of leaving me and making me sleep by myself and...don't you think I feel guilty...don't you think I remember how this all happened...the gun was mine...fuck...fuck!"
Tony watched Drake tear back inside. "Dad, how could you?"
"Go to him, Tony. He is in so much pain, and I can't help him anymore."
"You're pathetic," Tony grunted and raced inside to look for Drake.
* * * * * *
Drake was in the living room, pouring himself a drink. Tony stood looking at him, not sure what to say. "How can I make this go away?"
"You can't." He finished his drink and poured another. "This can."
Tony walked up to him and took the glass out of his hand. "No. Listen, you didn't mean to hurt Dad."
"I know that, but when I see him like this, I...and now he's on this other trip. It's insane."
Tony sucked in some breath. "Is it?" He looked up at him.
"Tony," he laughed uncomfortably, "not you too."
"I have to admit I've considered it. Those nights we sat together talking when Dad first came home from the hospital...well...sometimes you remind me so much of Angelo, and---"
"Yes." He nodded. "And you remind me of your father, so it wouldn't be like we were making love to each other, Tony. Do you want me to...?"
"Maybe I do," Tony urged, nodding. "And who would it hurt? Dad wants it. He wants me to take care of you."
"By sucking my cock?"
Tony was taken aback for a moment.
"You're getting caught up in the craziness going on around you, Tony. That's all. I don't care how much your father pushes me away...and that's what he wants, to push me away so that I won't hurt as much. He needs me. And I won't leave him. And I sure as hell won't betray him by fucking his son."
Tony nodded. "What in hell am I thinking?"
"You're thinking how lonely it is here at night for both of us. You're thinking about a warm body and a hard cock. And it's okay to think about it. Hell, fantasize about it if you want, but do it in your own bed...alone."
"What a drama queen," Johnny said suddenly, walking into the room, with his cane. He was laughing.
