by Tif Marcelo
She led him to Baby.
But once he stuffed his bag into the trunk and climbed into the passenger seat, the mood plummeted.
Regina wanted to speak to him; she wanted to hear his testimony before she went any further. So she silently drove the car to an empty parking lot a few buildings down, where there were fewer vehicles around. Home would’ve provided zero privacy. As soon as neighbors knew Logan was home, the doorbell would ring and guests would arrive, and a barbecue would begin, and all of her questions would’ve had to wait.
She turned in her seat as soon as she stopped the car. Logan’s head was already in his hands, and he fully understood that this conversation was going to happen right there and then.
“I haven’t been able to sleep, or think, Logan.”
“Me, either. The stares, the judgment. I see it everywhere.” He rubbed the heels of his hands into his eyes. “You don’t understand what I’ve been through.”
“I don’t understand? I think I do.” She made nail marks with her thumb on the foam of the steering wheel, because, of course, he was only thinking of himself. “I haven’t been able to talk to my own friends about it, either. Because surely they know, too, right? But that’s not remotely as important as what’s happening between us. Or what’s going to happen, with you.”
“I don’t know what’s next, babe. Everything is on hold right now. I’m just… supposed to wait.”
“For?”
He shrugged.
“And this other”—she wanted to say woman but couldn’t—“person.”
“She’s back, too.”
Regina straightened in her seat. “She is?” She had been out there in the crowd, in the same formation?
“Yes. Command thought that it would be better to get rid of the so-called problem, which was us, I guess.”
Regina’s insides trembled slightly, like a fault on the verge of cracking wide open. Her husband referring to himself and someone else as “us” was a slap in the face. But she shook the sense back into herself.
She believed him—there was nothing going on—and her anger was misplaced. “Will you tell me who accused you of having an affair?”
“I… I don’t know for sure, but I’ve been told by others that it might be…” He looked out the window.
“Who, Logan?”
“It’s someone we know. Personally.”
No. No. It couldn’t be. No one they knew would do this. And if so, why wouldn’t they have told her first?
“But that’s not what’s important,” he warned. “Everything is on the line. I… we… have to hold out. We’re supposed to move, remember? Who cares about all of these rumors when we’ll be out of here soon enough? I wanna keep lying low. Promise me that you’ll do the same. Let me handle this.”
Regina nodded, but did not promise, because she intended to get to the bottom of this.
CHAPTER FORTY-FIVE
Adelaide
“I feel like I’m missing an arm.” With Regina on her mind, Adelaide peeked over the top of the food truck’s counter to watch the mini doughnuts cook. She was riveted as she tracked the dough being piped into the hot oil, forming into a circle, and then moving on down the conveyer belt. The entire process took about a minute and fifty-six seconds—she had timed it while the customers in front of her ordered theirs—and Adelaide knew that her pregnant friend would have appreciated this little but mighty machine. “Regina would get a kick out of watching these doughnuts being made.”
Sophie unwrapped her turkey leg from its foil. “It was inevitable. She and Logan are having a baby, and they have a lot to catch up on this week. Though she did say that they were coming. I bet they’re around here somewhere.” She spun around and peered out into the crowd. “Do you know where Jasper and the girls went?”
Adelaide took a requisite look. “Nope, I don’t see them. But maybe Jasper found them already? Maybe I should order extra doughnuts.”
They were at the Millersville May Festival and what seemed like the entire community had congregated in the town square. The sun was just about to set, and the festival signage and rides lit up the sky. The sounds of carnival games and roller coasters were like white noise, punctuated by the occasional screams of riders. With the sudden shift in weather to hint that summer was around the corner, it was a perfect night, and Adelaide was relishing it.
It also helped that Matt’s return date had been solidified. The last of the unit was coming home in a week. Just one more week and she would see her husband, finally. She was counting the days until her best friend would be home, her lover would be back in her bed, and they would hopefully start their family.
Thank God.
“I’ll have a dozen, please,” Adelaide ordered, then turned to Sophie. “Have you been hearing…” Adelaide hedged on the question that she knew she shouldn’t ask. Matt had been terribly secretive, but sure enough, there had been some grumblings among the returned. She took another stab at the topic. “The other day, at a spouse luncheon, I overheard a group of ladies talking.”
“Oh?” Sophie’s face was unreadable.
The spouse’s club on post held a luncheon every month that was an opportunity to socialize while learning about a local business or charity. “They alluded to the fact that Logan was in the advance party because he couldn’t keep his nose clean downrange.”
“Mmm.” Sophie noshed on her turkey leg, which she was obviously using as a distraction.
Adelaide, feeling closer to the answer, decided to tackle the question from a third angle. “Did Jasper say how they chose who would come home on the advance party?”
Sophie side-eyed Adelaide, glancing a moment at their surroundings. Her voice plummeted to a whisper. “You know we can’t be talking about this.”
“Why not? It’s just you and me.” It sounded like the truth was at the tip of her friend’s tongue. “Regina’s been curt on text.”
“When is she ever not curt?”
“You know what I mean. She’s been unreachable. I understand she needs space. But after all the time we spent together, and add in the rumors…”
Her doughnuts made it to the end of the line, and they fell into a strainer. The food truck worker picked them up with tongs, dredged them with powdered sugar, and threw them into a paper sack. Adelaide began to drool when the sack was handed to her, warm to the touch.
“So you’re saying you’ve heard the rumors?” Sophie asked.
“Haven’t you?” Adelaide pried, feeling like she was pawing her way to the truth.
“You know as well as I do that rumors are bad news and many times aren’t even true.”
Adelaide peered at Sophie, master of the poker face. “You’re being so vague.”
“Because the situation is vague. For what it’s worth, I’ve probably heard the same things you have. But none of us really know what’s happened. The fact that Regina hasn’t come to us directly means that all the rumors are just that—rumors,” Sophie said. “Let’s go find our people.”
“Fine.”
They followed the path around the game tents, and Adelaide waved at every baby in a stroller. With Matt almost home, the excitement of trying for a baby threatened to bubble over. To be part of a family like Sophie, to have a child to love, was all Adelaide could think about. “Thank you for including me in your people, and for asking me to come out with your people.”
“Of course.” Sophie tugged on her elbow. “Hey, you okay?”
“I’m fine. No, let me take that back.” Adelaide was learning a little more about herself every day, and telling the truth about her emotions was something she had to work on. “I’m feeling out of sorts, I guess. It’s another transition, with you and Regina actually having other lives than our threesome. It’s great, of course, and I’ll get my reunion, too. But it’s a sign that things change, whether or not we’re ready.”
“I’m always here, though,” Sophie said.
“How are you and Jasper? I haven’t even asked.”
>
They took a few steps without Sophie answering. They stopped at the low metal barrier of the Octopus, a ride with tentacle-like arms that spun cars of passengers. “Do you think Jasper and the girls are in there? He loves this ride.”
The roller coaster’s music began, and the cars began to move and spin.
“Soph?” Adelaide didn’t like this attempt at distraction.
Sophie sighed. “We are fine in every sense of the word. It’s been intense, is all. You know how it is. Even the joy is a lot. It still feels fragile.”
“Oh, uh-huh,” Adelaide answered casually, though she saw through Sophie’s flippant answer. There was more on her friend’s mind. But she didn’t push it; marriage and relationships like theirs had too many layers for other people to judge outright, especially a marriage that had just endured separation. She smiled to lighten the moment. “I understand. Intimately. We’re so excited for them to be back—”
“And then, the toilet paper roll doesn’t get replaced, and then I start crying for no reason. I go from feeling so grateful, to wondering why his socks are all over the floor.”
Adelaide threw her head back and laughed. “It’s such a mess.”
“Right? Oh! There they are!” Sophie reached high in air and waved.
Adelaide followed her gaze, to the Ferris wheel, a ride over from the Octopus. Jasper was in between his girls, an arm wrapped around each, as their carriage was carried upward, slowly. Their faces were lit up by the carriage lights, and the twins’ expressions were either of terror or sheer delight.
Adelaide wondered what Matt would be like as a dad of twins. When she became a mom…
If she became a mom…
She shook away the thought. She shouldn’t do that to herself.
“Hey, where’d you go right there?” Sophie asked softly.
Adelaide bit her cheek and debated on how much to say, then tried for another stab at vulnerability. “I’m afraid. I’m afraid I won’t ever be a mom. All I’ve ever wanted was two kids and a dog and a picket fence. What if I don’t get the thing I want the most?”
Sophie slung an arm around her shoulder. “It’s normal to be afraid. And though I can’t predict the future, I’ll be here for you, and Regina will, too. For anything. And I guess Matt will be there for you, too, right?”
Adelaide laughed. “I guess I do need him.”
Sophie scrunched a cheek. “Well, technically, you don’t necessarily need him.”
“True. But I want him.” Adelaide grinned. Feeling better, she popped a doughnut in her mouth, savoring it as it melted on her tongue. Her mind whipped back to their biggest dessert aficionado. “I think we should have a baby shower.”
“I’m down,” Sophie said. “It’s about that time.”
“Yes, and before it gets too busy. Once the rest of the unit returns, we might get less of a turnout.” Adelaide gave her the side-eye. “And in case things get… complicated?”
Sophie’s eyebrow rose. “Are we still talking about this?”
“Regina deserves a shower despite… what we might be hearing. I want her to know that we support her, no matter what. Maybe at our next book club?”
“It’s my month. We can make it a surprise. I was thinking of another YA book.”
“You’re really liking YA.”
“YA and romance. You really corrupted me.” She side-bumped her. “Actually, the right word is enlightened.”
“You’re welcome!” Adelaide yelled. The people in front of them turned around, confused.
Sophie laughed, sinking her teeth into the hunk of meat.
“By the way, you are the first person I’ve ever known to buy a turkey leg.”
“It’s damn good.” Sophie took another a bite, chewed, and swallowed. She looked over her shoulder. “Look, Ad. Ultimately, whatever’s going on with them is their issue. Not our monkeys.”
“But we have such a small unit. And we’re friends. We should be there for one another in spite of it all.”
“The line is thin and very fuzzy.”
In front of them, Jasper and the girls appeared. The twins were chatting nonstop about their Ferris wheel ride. Jasper was out of breath, laughing.
“It’s your turn, Mommy,” Carmela said. “Daddy wants to take you on there.” She pointed to a kid’s train roller coaster that turned corners at lightning speed so that adults disembarked nauseated.
Sophie eyed Jasper. “That ride isn’t meant for anyone who’s had a baby.”
“C’mon, don’t be a fraidy-cat,” Jasper challenged.
“Come with us, Adelaide.”
Adelaide laughed. “Heck no! I haven’t had a baby, and it makes me want to wet my pants. You guys go. I’ll watch the girls.”
With that, Jasper pulled Sophie away, faux kicking and screaming, and got in line with the next group. With the twins, Adelaide watched the two get seated.
From behind, the music tent played a seventies disco song. The roller coaster began, and the screeching noise of the wheels was drowned out by the music, and soon, the crowd around them began to sing. The twins, who’d climbed up on the metal barrier, belted along, and Adelaide found herself humming to the music.
And for the first time in a long time, she was at peace.
She didn’t know what brought it on. Perhaps it was the knowledge that everything was all right at this moment. That Matt would be home soon. That she was watching a friend scream her head off on a roller coaster, that she was eating fair food, and was tapping her foot along to disco.
Perhaps this was enough, this peace. That even if she never became a mother, her life could be just as fulfilled and content as this moment, with a family that cared for her, with a body that was healthy enough to be out enjoying this night, with these little girls she loved like her own, and, yes, with the book club that she’d given life to.
She pocketed this feeling and promised herself to hold on to it as long as she could. Because her instincts also told her that trouble was brewing.
CHAPTER FORTY-SIX
Sophie
Sophie ended up needing to go to the bathroom after the kiddie roller coaster, and she left her girls with Adelaide and Jasper at the game tent. Walking swiftly, she crossed the park to the fair’s only set of restrooms. The sun had set, and the music was in full swing. The dinner crowd had arrived, and she was starving.
There was a line for the ladies’ room that snaked outside the little building. She followed it to the last person, an older woman who shifted from one foot to the other. “Damn.”
“You’re telling me,” the woman said.
Sophie crossed her arms and looked up at the sky. She counted the stars, then sang along with the NSYNC song being blasted over the loudspeakers, all in the name of distraction. She should have known better than to have waited too long—it was a lesson she’d tried to impart to her girls. The moment one was desperate enough was exactly the time there would be a long line.
She heard a couple arguing. She turned to see a man and a woman behind a tent, mostly shrouded in darkness.
“We can’t do this here,” he said. “My wife’s literally in the bathroom, and she’ll be out any second.”
“You can’t just walk away. What about me?” The woman’s voice was shrill.
“You knew this was temporary.…”
Sophie couldn’t hear the rest of the man’s words, though he continued to speak. His profile and build were familiar, though she couldn’t place where. He was holding the woman—shorter by a head, with a ponytail—by both shoulders. His tone was pleading.
Curious in the same way she frantically paged through the black moment in books, Sophie wandered to the space, her conversation with Adelaide earlier replaying itself in her head. What she was witnessing was none of Sophie’s business, but she was drawn to it.
And with every step, the man’s profile became clearer.
The man was Logan.
Please, God, no.
Sophie had put on a poker face for
Adelaide earlier, but yes, Sophie had heard the rumors, too. That Logan was back early because he and another soldier had been inappropriate; adultery was suspected, though nothing could be proved. Even Jasper couldn’t confirm it despite her inquiry. And she knew better than to push.
Sometimes, it was better not to know.
Because right now, seeing Logan with this woman, touching her, looking into her eyes, Sophie realized that the rumors were true. If the two had just been friends, wouldn’t they be conversing out in the open like everyone else? Would they be in a heated argument?
Sophie stepped on a soda can, and the noise drew the two people apart.
Shit.
There was no way out of this but through. Sophie pressed her lips together in what she hoped was a smile. “Hi. Logan?”
“Yeah?” he frowned.
She approached them, leaving the bright spotlight of the tents. “I’m Sophie Walden. From the neighborhood. My husband is Jasper Clemens.”
The woman backed away. “I’ve gotta go.” She turned without another word.
Logan’s face broke into a smile, though it didn’t quite make it to his eyes. “Oh, hey, it’s nice to see you again.”
“Yeah, welcome home.” She crossed her arms. Her curiosity had flipped to protectiveness.
“Thanks.” He mimicked her stance. “Regina should be back soon. And that was… someone I worked with.”
She assessed him, though red flags waved in front of her eyes. Bullshit—that woman wasn’t just a coworker. And Sophie was going to tell him that she knew. That she’d seen enough! And how could he be such a lying jerk?
But Sophie also envisioned Regina’s expression at finding out that Sophie had not gone to her first, and thought twice.
She would have to speak to Regina first, and alone.
“Oh, hey, babe!” Logan raised his eyes to the space over Sophie’s shoulder.
Sophie shut her eyes. She took a breath. She schooled her expression as she would with a vulnerable patient.
She turned. “Hey, Reggie!” Her voice sounded fake, but she went with it. “I was just in line for the bathroom and I saw Logan, and he was…” Her brain stuttered a step. “Waiting for you. I thought I would say hi.”
