“Cool.” Landon dug into his waffles. “Can he sleep over again?”
“Maybe some time.” I sat down at the table with my coffee. “You like Josh, don’t you?”
Landon nodded, his smile ringed with syrup. “He likes to play with us.”
So far, Josh checked off all of my boxes. He was willing to be patient with me, funny as hell, my kids loved him, and if he was as good at the other stuff as he was at kissing, I had a lot to look forward to. But he wasn’t supposed to be dating me.
I grabbed a piece of waffle off of Landon’s plate, dipping it in syrup as he protested. “Josh is going to be one of your teachers.” I wasn’t exactly sure where I was going with this, but Landon’s face lit up. “When you go to school, you have to treat him like all of your other teachers. He might not be able to play with you there, because he’ll be busy working.”
“Okay.” Landon seemed to understand. “But he can still play with us here?”
Leave it to my four-year-old to make it so simple. “Yes, he can.”
I knew I needed to let Josh worry about how he was going to deal with this at work, but the last thing I wanted was for the rug to be snatched out from all of us. He’d be crazy if he chose me over his career, if it even came down to that.
We’d only hung out a couple times, and I’d waited for Josh to get in touch with me every time. That was the first thing I needed to change. “Your presence has been requested.” I told him when I called. “Landon wanted to know when…” I almost said when you’re sleeping over again, but that was way too suggestive. “He was happy you stayed over.” I finished the statement quietly.
“We got caught? Oh.” I’d felt the same way at first.
“It’s okay. He has no idea what it means, besides you like Legos and ice cream.” I laughed. “They think you’re pretty awesome.”
“Likewise,” Josh said. “And so are you.”
My cheeks flushed. “So how do we do this? I’m used to booty calls and guys that have wives. I probably should have asked you. You’re not married, are you?”
Josh laughed. “No. My closet is embarrassingly skeleton free.”
I wished I could say the same. “That’s the best news I’ve heard in a long time.” Just talking to him, I felt better. “When can I see you again?”
“I thought you’d never ask.” Josh’s voice lifted now that I was finally making a move. “Have the boys ever been to the Children’s Museum?”
“No.” I’d meant for him to come over and hang out, but I wasn’t going to say no to an adventure. “They loved the aquarium.”
“How about Saturday, we go check it out? We can get dinner on the way home.”
“That sounds wonderful.”
**
“So the cops were at your house the other night?” My mother asked when I called. “Margaret heard it on the police scanner.”
“Yeah.” My aunt Margaret listened to the police scanner with the same enthusiasm my mother watched home shopping. “Did she tell you what happened?”
“She just said they were called for a disturbance.” My mother sighed, not the least bit concerned. “What happened this time?”
“Troy went nuts and beat the crap out of me.” I’d spent the last couple of days dealing with the aftermath of it. I’d gone down to the police station to make a statement. They’d taken pictures of my face and leg. I renewed the restraining order, this time for a year. I’d have to go to court and petition to have his visitation rights taken away, but the person I spoke to thought the judge would rule in my favor. This wasn’t Troy’s first arrest for assault and battery. She told me they wanted to send him to a rehab facility for his substance abuse problems. She’d also given me the name of a counselor that I hadn’t called yet. I wasn’t sure I ever would.
“I’m sure it wasn’t that bad.” She had to be kidding me. “What did you do?”
“There wasn’t a lot I could do, besides make sure he didn’t hurt the kids.” I’d never shake the memory of the kids screaming as Troy kicked me. “Someone else called the cops.”
“I meant what did you do to piss him off.” Of course she would think this was my fault. She always did.
“Nothing.” I’d called her to tell her that I was okay, and that I met someone who was the complete opposite of Troy, but she didn’t give a shit. “I’m okay, in case you’re wondering.”
“I figured.” Rage coursed through my body. “I ordered you a new vacuum. I noticed your carpet was a mess when I was there the other day.” Bullshit. On so many levels. She was more concerned about the rug than my wellbeing?
“Keep it.” She could shove her vacuum up her ass. “I don’t want anything from you.” I hung up before she had a chance to say anything else.
**
“Look at the airplanes! Lucas, up in the sky!” I pointed out the window. The kids were stoked about the ride to Boston. They’d never been to the city before and they loved all the trucks, skyscrapers, and especially the planes. We probably didn’t even need to take them to the museum.
“Where are the planes going?” Landon asked.
“All over the world,” Josh said as he drove, but we took my car. It had the car seats and it was already a warzone in the back. His car looked like he actually cared about it, and it may have never recovered from an afternoon with these two.
“So those people are up in the sky?” Landon had his head tipped up so he didn’t miss a thing. “That’s so cool.”
“Someday, we’ll go someplace in an airplane.” I hoped I wasn’t making an empty promise. I’d never flown anywhere, either. Landon’s mouth dropped.
“You know where I hear is really cool?” Josh looked back at him in the rear view mirror. “Mickey Mouse’s house.”
Landon gasped. “People really get to go there? I thought that was just on TV.”
“Nope, people go there all the time,” I told him, and I’d never seen Landon so excited.
I was glad I brought the stroller into the museum, because both boys passed out before we even left the building. They did everything: blew bubbles, banged on steel drums, and pedaled a bike to make a sign light up. Josh and Landon climbed a rope sculpture while Lucas and I played with the trains.
“Our dates are sleeping on the job.” Josh laughed, pushing the stroller. “Why don’t we get some takeout and sit by the water?”
We got lobster rolls from a food truck out in front of the museum, and walked halfway down the Harborwalk before picking a bench to settle on. “This is such a pretty city,” Josh said as he unwrapped his dinner.
“Isn’t it?” A duck boat went by in the harbor and I almost woke up the kids so they could see it. They loved them when they saw them on TV. “Have you ever seen the ads for Codzilla? The speedboat that does harbor tours?”
“Yeah, that looks awesome.” He looked over at the stroller, Lucas was still sprawled out on top of Landon, both out cold. “Do you think they’re big enough to go on it?”
“Not yet. A couple more years.”
“It’s nice to have someone do to stuff with.” Josh smiled. “I’ve been dying to explore the city.”
“How long ago did you move here?” I asked.
“Two months ago. I feel like a hermit. It’s harder meeting people than I thought it would be.”
“Did you live in New York City before?” I asked.
“Yeah. Queens.”
“And you still like Boston?”
“I do. Even though it’s kind of far from the city.” Josh laughed.
I whacked him. “Did you always live there?” I hesitated. “When you were a kid?”
“Born and raised.” Josh nodded, wiping his mouth with his napkin. “I never thought I’d leave.”
“Where did you go after everything happened?” I hadn’t been able to stop thinking about what happened to his mom. I didn’t realize I’d let things get so bad, and I’m sure she didn’t, either. My blood ran cold every time I thought about what would happen to the kids
if I was gone.
He looked out at the water. “I was in foster care for a while. Then my aunt was able to take me in my junior year of high school.”
“They threatened my mother that they were going to put me in foster care, but I got pregnant before it happened.” I’d never told anyone that before. And for some reason, the child protective service people decided it was safe for me to stay with her once I had a baby. I never understood it, but they helped me get an apartment once I turned eighteen.
“Why?” Josh looked surprised. “Not the pregnant part, I understand how that happens, but the foster care. That’s usually a last resort.”
“They thought she was neglecting me.” After my dad died, my mom stopped caring about things. She never wanted to leave the house, so we didn’t always have things like food, or new clothes. Until she discovered that she could order almost anything online. Then too much stuff started coming, because she thought she needed all of it. Cleaning had never been her priority, and it got worse as all the boxes started piling up. Things stopped working in the house, like the washing machine, and I had to wash my clothes in the sink. If I didn’t wash hers too, she wouldn’t have bothered. “She’s a hoarder.”
“Oh. People make fun of that because of the TV show, but it’s pretty serious.”
“It’s awful. I can’t bring the kids to her house because I’m afraid they’ll get hurt. And that doesn’t bother her. I have to beg her to come see them, and that doesn’t even work.” I wasn’t going to let my mother ruin today. I still hadn’t talked to her since I’d hung up on her. “I wanted to do everything differently than she did, but it’s hard. I hear myself saying things that came out of her mouth and I cringe.”
“I don’t think you’re anything like your mother.” Josh smiled sadly. “These kids are definitely not neglected and your house is clean.”
“What was it like? Being in foster care?” It had terrified me much more than it affected my mother. Any time I got called to the office in school, or people I didn’t know came to the house, I was convinced they were going to take me away.
Josh sighed. “I was in three different places. Two of them weren’t bad, but it was never home. I always felt like a guest that had stayed too long. The third place was in a bad neighborhood and I started to get involved with some of the guys in gangs. I was younger than those guys, and I was scared. I started doing stuff for them, delivering their drugs and things like that. I robbed someone.” Josh looked away from me, his face darkening with regret. “And I saw some things that would give you nightmares. My aunt found out what was going on, and adopted me. She got me into the private school at her parish. I used to be bitter that it took her that long, but now I’m just thankful that she did it. She saved me.”
I shuddered, but even though his story was terrible, it gave me hope. If he could dig himself out of a situation like that, anything was possible. “It’s weird to be able to see it from the other side, isn’t it?”
“Yeah.” Josh slid closer to me now that we were done eating. “You’re doing a great job, Bree. It’s not easy.” He put his fingers under my chin, turned my face to his, and kissed me.
Lucas started to stir, still sleepy, and sat up. I put the rest of my fries on the tray in front of him. “I don’t know. I just gave my baby french fries for dinner.”
“He looks pretty happy about it.” We hadn’t completely pulled away from each other yet, Josh’s cheek was against mine when he turned to look at the kids, his stubble prickling my skin. “We can stop at McDonald’s on the way home.”
“Oh, that will put me back in the running for mother of the year.” I laughed as we walked back to the parking garage. Josh helped me buckle Landon in, and then kissed me when we got in the front seat. “I have a question for you.”
“Yes.” Josh winked at me as he turned over the ignition. “The answer is yes. Whatever you were going to ask me.”
I whacked his arm. Wait until he found out what I was going to ask him. “You don’t even know what it is yet.”
“Now you know how to phrase your question to get the answer you want.” He tried to keep the smile from spreading over his face, but it wasn’t working.
“It doesn’t change anything.” But still, I was nervous and I already knew I was going to get my way. “Do you want to sleep over?”
Chapter Ten
“Can Josh read me a story?” Landon asked, he’d been almost impossible to settle down once he realized Josh was coming back home with us. I knew we were going to pay dearly for those late naps after the museum. But hopefully not for asking Josh to stay.
I looked over to Josh, who was lying on the floor playing with Lucas, not sure what to say. “If he wants to?” I didn’t know if it would make him uncomfortable. Even though he’d spent all day with the kids, it was still pretty personal.
Josh sat up. “What’s your favorite bedtime story?”
“Pigeon!” Landon called out, his face brightened once he realized he was getting his way. There was a bunch of books about a sassy little pigeon who wanted to drive busses and eat hot dogs that I strongly encouraged every night because they were funny as hell.
“Those are the best,” Josh said. Of course he was familiar with the books. “But I can’t read anything to anyone who hasn’t brushed his teeth.”
Landon ran into the bathroom. I looked at Josh in disbelief. “Really? That’s all it takes?” I’d been lobbying to get him to do the same thing for a half an hour.
“Magic.” Josh turned back to Lucas and held up his hand. “Give me five.” Lucas slapped his hand, and then I scooped him up to bring him into the bathroom. It was always my goal to get the kids in bed at the same time.
Landon pulled on Josh’s hand to bring him into the bedroom once he passed my hygiene standards. I leaned in the doorway of the bathroom not sure what to do. “Can I come, too?” I asked.
At first I didn’t think Landon was going to say yes. He stopped, still holding Josh’s hand, carefully considering his options. “Can we sleep in your bed, Mama?”
Hell no. “Not tonight, baby.” He frowned. It wasn’t going to work. “Why don’t you show Josh what a big boy you are and sleep in your own bed?” Because later, I wanted Josh to show me what a big boy he was by sleeping in my bed. I laughed out loud at the thought. The three of them looked at me like I’d lost it, and they were probably right, but I just shook my head and followed them to the bedroom.
I lay in Lucas’ bed, and Josh sat with Landon, and we traded off reading stories until the boys passed out.
“Good job,” I whispered, easing out from under Lucas’ body.
“How do we get out of here?” Josh whispered back. He’d wound up next to the wall, and Landon was sprawled between him and freedom. Amateur.
“Very carefully.” I was already up, between the beds, and I held out my hand to help Josh step off the bed without falling on my kid or waking him up. I looked back to Landon before we left, saying a quick prayer that he’d actually sleep through the night.
We were still holding hands when I closed the bedroom door. Josh backed me up against the wall in the hallway and kissed me. This was our first time truly alone, that we’d planned, and it changed everything.
From the start of our relationship, we’d had to act like an old married couple. Don’t get me wrong, it was everything I’d ever wanted, but now that we didn’t have an audience, I had a feeling Josh was going to be a whole other fantasy for me.
He brought my hand up over my head, fingers still interlaced as he parted my lips, stubble scraping my chin. I tipped my head back and sighed against him as he ran his other hand down my cheek, falling to my shoulder, and settling on my breast. I pushed my body against his and he pinned me back to the wall by his hips, never taking his lips away from mine.
I gasped when he stopped, but his forehead still rested against mine. His eyes burned bright in the shadows, the heat of his body setting me on fire. “What do you want to do now?” he asked.
>
The room was spinning around me, this total shift in everything I knew Josh to be made me dizzy in the best possible way. Nothing I said would do this feeling justice. So many times, I’d fallen for a guy too fast. Daisy teased me that I could fall in love with anyone. But this was different. We’d done everything right.
My bedroom was adjacent to the boys’ room. I reached over, still pinned to the wall by Josh’s body, and opened the door.
Josh kissed me one more time before easing away from me. I led him into my room and sat at the foot of the bed. I usually did this the other way around. Screwed a guy and then tried to start a relationship. It never worked. And that’s why I was terrified, because what if going to bed with Josh was a ticking bomb, and everything we’d built was about to get destroyed?
He put his knee between my legs, and pushed me gently back to the mattress. Running his fingers over my cheek, he looked down at me, smiling. “I’m glad you invited me to stay tonight.” Leaning down and kissing me, he added, “I hope this is what you had in mind.”
I wrapped my arms around his neck, pulling him in closer to me. His body crashed down on mine, and he fisted my hair in his fingers. “It’s exactly what I was thinking of.” I giggled, because I was terrible at trying to be sexy.
Josh leaned back, peeling off his T-shirt, then undid his belt buckle. I probably should have helped him, but I was enjoying the show too much. His body was lean but a little muscular, he’d never mentioned doing any sort of sport, but he looked like he could have. I took the opportunity to slide back to the head of the bed. Once he was down to his boxer briefs, he crawled up to me at the pillows, crushing his lips against mine. I ran my hands up and down his arms, and he moaned against my cheek before he moved down to my neck. I cried out when he hit the spot just below my ear that made everything in my body go haywire.
His hands were hot under my shirt, the air shockingly cool as he bared my skin, separating from me just enough to bring the shirt over my head. I covered my bra, forgetting until now I’d thrown on some crappy thing this morning when I had no idea I was going to do this. But then I remembered no guy in the history of sex ever cared about any of that shit as they were taking it off of a girl.
The Trouble with Bree (Spotlight #1.5) Page 5
