“Why does that mean you have to go home?”
“Because I won’t be needed anymore. She’s an artist. She’ll come home emotionally wrung out and wound up and probably want to lose herself in her work. She keeps weirder hours than I do. Or she’ll just want privacy. Any way you look at it, I’ll be in the way.” Pausing, Alyx took a deep breath and added, “Jonas, forgive me for my rude reaction. I’m still stunned at what Parke was actually considering, as much as at learning my time here would be cut short, but that’s no excuse. I’d love for you to come by later, if and when you’re free.”
He was there before Venus could be seen descending behind the grand red monuments for the last time that season. For the rest of the year the planet of love would be the morning star for early risers. Jonas wondered if that was good luck or not? He knew he needed all the luck he could get and he wasn’t about to dis a goddess, as the kids said.
Something had to be working in his favor—as he strode up the sidewalk, she opened the front door. Before she could finish explaining that Grace had heard his arrival and informed her, he swept her into his arms.
“I was beginning to believe someone had asked for a sunset flight,” she began. Then she couldn’t say more because he’d silenced her with an impassioned kiss.
While he was far from rough, Jonas made it clear how eager he’d been to get here and how good it felt to hold her against him. “Thank goodness no one did,” he said. “I’d have been forced into buying them off if it meant not getting to see you before you leave.”
“Jonas, Parke hasn’t called again. She may have changed her mind.”
“Something tells me that she won’t—which, for the record, professionally and as a man who believes in the whole one-man-one-woman thing, is my idea of sound judgment.”
“Yes, I would have told her that from the instant the man started his sales pitch.”
Then Alyx had ten times the smarts of her cousin, regardless of Parke’s talent. “So we need to talk,” he murmured, although from the way he held her it was clear he had something else in mind first.
She hid her face against his shoulder. “Yes. But please not tonight. Could we hold off until tomorrow over coffee?”
Jonas lifted his head and tightened his arms. “Are you saying you want me to stay?” He all but held his breath waiting for her to decide.
“I hope you can and will.”
Jonas released her only to pet a waiting Grace and close the door. “Sweetheart, there’s nowhere else I’d rather be.”
For hours he’d worried that what ground they’d recovered in the last several days was lost. That had put serious cracks in his confidence. But Alyx’s eager embrace soon had him forgetting that injury. Kissing Alyx, Jonas realized, would forever be his connection to dreams of what could be.
“Can I get you a glass of wine?” she asked him.
“I’m high enough just looking at you.”
If Alyx had shown reluctance at any instance, he would have backed off but, in fact, she smiled and held him with the same fervor. Deciding that unless Grace sank her teeth into his calf, he had plans. Jonas swung Alyx up into his arms and carried her to the guest bedroom that she’d made hers and laid her across the bed.
“You look too perfect to touch,” he said, giving her a last chance to bolt. She was lovely in her white satin robe, her dark hair cascading around her like a dark pool.
“I hope that doesn’t stop you,” she murmured, drawing him down to her.
Thus began an evening Jonas suspected would be forever burned in his memory. He’d thought he knew about lovemaking; Alyx taught him a new dimension.
He’d never felt more peace and yet more need than when lying against her, inhaling her scent. The only thing better would be to feel them naked together and he wasted no time in making that a reality. Alyx had prepared for him with her minimal attire, only the robe and her best lace panties beneath. Knowing she’d dressed for him, had been preparing for him, only added to his hunger. He rose only long enough to strip, while she turned down the crisp sheets.
She moved like a caress of sun-warmed air flowing over the mesa, bringing him to life and filling him with hope and resilience. Jonas wanted to praise her, thank her, but the words were trapped, building in his chest like the hunger building in his groin. Hoping she didn’t mind his lack of patience, he urged her back onto the bed and brushed her robe off her shoulders to adore her with his mouth.
To his surprise, she stiffened. Although his move had been subtle, he had to ask, “Did I hurt you?”
“No, I must have set the air conditioner too low, that’s all. Would you mind if I slip my arms back into my robe?”
She wasn’t cold, Jonas knew. Steam all but emanated from her. Then it struck him—it wasn’t as dark as she would probably have liked it to be, and inevitably her mind was on her scars and what he would remember if she did have to say goodbye to him.
“Put your arms around me.” He spread kisses up her stomach and over each breast. When he reached her lips, he slid into her slowly. “I’ll keep you warm. In sunshine or moonlight, you never have to feel shy or hide from me, don’t you know that by now? I adore your body as much as I’m in awe of your courage, but do you think if you ran from me tomorrow, those scars are what I’d visualize?” His breath hitched slightly as he drew out and entered her again. “Uh-uh. I’d be seeing your expression as it is now with your lips moist from my kiss, your eyes glowing from the feel of me inside you, your hands biting into my hips because you want more of me.”
A strange expression came over her face and Jonas knew that whatever endearments he told her now—or for that matter had told her the last time they’d made love—were just words to her. Damage was damage and you couldn’t erase it with willpower or verbal compliments. Only time and proving his unfailing delight in her might remove the worst memories and doubt. He had to fight for that opportunity.
Brushing his lips along her collarbone, his teeth along the graceful length of her neck, he rasped, “All right, then believe in this.”
He stroked her with the earned intimacy of a longtime lover, probing with his fingers where they were joined just to feel her spasm and arch closer. He cupped and caressed each full and taut breast, teasing her with his tongue and teeth. Listening to her soft yearning sounds, Jonas urged her to ecstasy, and when she cried out her climax, he locked his mouth to hers and drove to his own release.
Alyx wasn’t a snuggling type of woman. She’d fought too hard for her independence, and her profession had made her even less inclined to be clingy. However, after the first waves of passion ebbed, instead of rolling onto her back and, sated, stretching her arms overhead to hug her pillow, she let Jonas keep her lying across his chest, and listened to the reassurance of his strong heartbeat.
“Not cold anymore?” Jonas murmured.
She had a good mind to pinch him where the mark wouldn’t show, but decided he’d been too wonderful to deserve that. It had surprised her, too, that she’d had a sudden case of self-consciousness, until she started focusing on him rather than on herself. With a contented sigh, she combed her fingers through his chest hair. “I’ve decided this is the second most tantalizing thing next to your kisses,” she replied.
“Do tell?” He stroked her from shoulder to hip and left his hand there. “Should other parts of the anatomy feel left out and have hurt feelings?”
Alyx grinned. “Absolutely not. You’re an entirely gorgeous man. From our first time together, I literally had to force myself to leave you and open a briefcase full of affidavits and disclosure briefs.”
“Why, counselor, that’s a compliment to treasure.” He stroked her hair. “I told you we fitted.”
“Mmm. What do your friend and his wife think of you suddenly abandoning their home?”
“The truth is, having me under their roof was a necessary evil. If they knew who or where you are, they’d be trying to drug you with magnolias as insurance to keep me here.”
Alyx laughed out loud at the southern charm reference. “I’ve been vaccinated.”
“That’s probably a good thing. If you were a full-fledged magnolia you’d be lethal.”
Alyx glanced up at him and tapped him on the heart. “You did fall for a Yankee version of Scarlett once.”
“Full disclosure—Claudia’s people were originally from Olde Virginia. I guess you could say that I’ve been vaccinated, too.”
“Good grief, we have more in common than I thought!”
Jonas’s gaze heated and he rubbed his thumb over her lower lip, still swollen from his kisses. “I bet we do. Favorite place to be kissed?”
Alyx nuzzled the nipple nearest her mouth. “Too easy. You’ve been there and you’ve done that.”
“I was giving you a chance to start your Santa list early.”
“Ho-ho!” Intrigued with the question, she lifted her head to meet his wicked smile. “Favorite spectator sport?”
“Strip poker.”
“That isn’t a spectator sport,” she scoffed.
“It is if you keep winning.”
Alyx might have been amused if she didn’t immediately think about who he might like to watch lose her clothes. The spasm of jealousy she suffered was anything but pleasant and she rolled off him to lie back on her pillow.
Jonas followed, resting his head on his hand. He lazily ran his other hand in a serpentine path from the hollow of her throat to her knee. “That was an extremely interesting reaction.”
“Enjoy it while it lasts.”
“I am.” As her nipple responded to his caresses, he lowered his head to wet it then graze her gently with his teeth.
“Wretch.”
“So what would you have said?”
“Never mind, it would have been boring.”
“Trust me,” he murmured, initiating the serpentine caress again. “I’m anything but bored. Favorite spectator sport?”
“The truth? It’s a toss-up between figure skating and ballroom dancing. I don’t get to see much grace or eloquence of expression in my work—creative anger, yes. Anyway, it strikes me that both skills need exceptional discipline, and let’s face it, the participants are mostly young people. I often find myself thinking if we could transfer that dedication to relationships, we’d have fewer divorces.”
Jonas took hold of her hand and raised it to his lips. “That’s a profound observation. You see a great deal of sadness, not just the ugliness in people, don’t you?”
She’d been aware of his returning arousal for several moments and reaching down to stroke him, she purred, “That’s why I like to observe and surround myself with beautiful things, haven’t you noticed?”
“As a matter of fact, I have.” Closing his hand around hers to tighten her hold, he replied, “You’d be a knockout in any of those costumes. Favorite dance?”
“This one,” she said, offering her mouth as she shifted to welcome him into her body.
Listening to Jonas murmur his pleasure, Alyx eased him onto his back, then covered him with her body. Cupping her bottom with his hands, he thrust himself fully into her moist heat, just as she found the same inviting and tantalizing home in his mouth. Their strokes were slow and restrained, as disciplined and thorough as a skilled dancer honoring the tempo of the music that hummed in their veins.
When she would have sat up, though, Jonas kept her locked against him. “Stay with me like this,” he whispered. “I want to feel all of you.”
Alyx’s hair became a veil of privacy for their erotic kisses. They built to a sweet torture, dragging soft moans from each other, and their bodies grew slick, making each caress and thrust more provocative. If they ever did dance together, she wouldn’t be able to stop remembering this sensual tango.
Just when she thought she would be torn in half from heart to womb from the intense yearning, Jonas rolled her onto her back and, twining his fingers between hers, he stared down at her with rapt concentration and surged into her again.
“Tell me it’s never been like this with anyone else?” he demanded.
“You know that.”
“And it never will,” he muttered and surged again, then again until she couldn’t help but cry out.
To Alyx, he seemed almost angry. Gone was the take-everything-with-a-grain-of-salt playboy who enjoyed sensual romps, but kept his deepest inner feelings to himself. Here was a different Jonas Hunter with emotions naked and feelings raw. Did he resent her for reaching this depth in him? Was he so ingrained with the Bureau life, that he had lost touch with his soul?
Her heart all but broke for that, for him. She’d never felt such anguish and tenderness in her life. “Jonas, darling…I’m yours,” she whispered urgently. “For as long as you want me.”
“I’ll go to my grave wanting you.”
With that thickly groaned confession, he crushed his mouth to hers and raced them to a shattering climax.
So this was what it was like. Alyx’s pounding heart felt almost too large for her chest, and she had the strongest urge to burst into tears. Gently extricating her hands from his, she wrapped her arms around him and stroked his back and the damp hair at his nape.
“Jonas, don’t be angry because you feel or want more than you thought you did.”
He went absolutely still, even stopped breathing for an instant and all that moved was his heart pounding even more fiercely than hers. Slowly lifting his head, he uttered, “I don’t just want you.” Drawing a shaky breath, he added gruffly, “I love you.”
Like a snowball subjected to a microwave oven, Alyx totally melted. “Well, you don’t look very happy about it.”
“You wouldn’t either if you found yourself totally nuts about someone who saw you as little more than a sex toy. A favorite one—probably only admitted under duress—but merely entertainment nonetheless.”
“Oh, you have it all figured out, do you?”
Once again he went still. Then he reached over and turned on the bedside light. Looming over her, he studied her face with all of the seriousness of an interrogator. Slowly his expression went from grim to wondrous and tender. Gently, he caressed her cheek.
“Help me out here, counselor. I’m feeling uniquely obtuse.”
“It’s a bit of a revelation to me, as well,” she replied wryly.
When she didn’t blurt out the admission as he had, he growled, “Damn it, Alyx, say it.”
“I love you, too.”
In the end that alone couldn’t change anything, she realized. In fact, it would now make things all the more complicated, which would add to their problems, but for this moment, she let herself bask in the honeyed glow of rapture, perfectly culminating in Jonas’s passionate embrace and possessive kiss. She loved and was a beloved. Miracles do happen, she thought, even when you’re not looking for them.
“How long have you known?” he demanded.
“It had to have been coming on gradually, but I was certain just now when I saw how upset you seemed to be—and that hurt. ‘Love doesn’t wound,’ isn’t that the way it’s written?” Then curiosity got the best of her. “When did it hit you?”
“When I saw you again at the market.” His expression grew dark with fury and he winced as though feeling an unexpected stab. “And then to see that no-good creep put his hands on you…he’s lucky I didn’t tear out his arm.”
“My bloodthirsty hero.”
Jonas chuckled, only to grow sober and kiss her with breathtaking gentleness. “Thank you. I’d about resigned myself to having to settle for your lust.”
“Don’t undersell it. Lust matters a great deal,” she said, stroking her fingers through his chest curls again.
“Especially now,” he murmured against her lips.
Of course, they made love again, and this time they left the lights on.
Chapter Eleven
“What if I moved to Texas?”
If Alyx thought Parke’s announcement yesterday had shocked her, Jonas’s had her choking on her first
sip of coffee the next morning. She burned her tongue, too, but managed not to destroy the section of the newspaper that he’d picked up to read.
“What do you mean?” she croaked between coughs.
His expression went from concern for her to wounded. “What kind of response was that?”
“About as honest as I can get.” Rising from the barstool at the counter, Alyx ripped off a paper towel from the roller under a cabinet and returned to mop up the splashes of coffee. She knew Jonas was watching her with those keen, pale eyes, trying to read more of what she thought, and it was all she could do to keep her hands from trembling as she tried a second sip of coffee.
“So what was last night?”
She wasn’t fooled by his casual tone; her reaction had disappointed him. But he was moving so fast. “How can that be an option right now—or were you considering asking to transfer to the Dallas or Houston offices?” They hadn’t discussed the failed promotion again, but it appeared that couldn’t be avoided, and she couldn’t imagine him asking to transfer there and work under the person who’d been put ahead of him. She’d seen Jonas operate as an agent and knew he was a consummate professional, but he had his pride.
Jonas frowned and put down his own mug. “What would be the sense in that if you’re in Austin? I simply assumed you wanted to see more of me.”
“Of course, but—so you have decided to leave the Bureau?” She was careful not to use the word quit. “Is that wise without having a new position to move into?”
“Don’t worry that I’d ask or expect you to support me.”
“Jonas, I wasn’t thinking that.”
“I just thought—damn.”
At night he left his cell phone on vibrate and right now it was jiggling like a kid’s windup toy scrambling across the soapstone counter. Snatching it up, he flipped it on. “Yeah?” he growled.
There was a pause, then, “Sorry if this is bad timing. Do you recognize my voice?”
Jonas stiffened. “Sure.”
“There’s a situation and I need help. It’s as bad as it gets. Not for me or us, but someone I care about. Can you come? Please be careful how you answer that.”
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