by Tessa Bailey
This time when I fire, I hit slightly to the right of my mark, but I hear Katie’s laughter through my headgear, so the disappointment it short-lived. Especially when she eases the gun from my hands, sets it down and motions for me to remove my headgear. “Are you telling me you’ve never handled a weapon like this, Jack?”
“Yeah . . .” Realizing I’m jerking my shoulders like I’ve had an electric shock, I force myself to stop. “I haven’t.”
“Well . . . shite.” She’s sputtering a little and it makes me desperate to kiss her. “No one hit the mark at the first session on Monday. Not even close. And you’ve basically just done it twice.” A beat passes while I just stare at Katie, trying to sort through the pounding in my chest. “And it’s not only the accuracy, it’s the way you shifted your weight to accommodate the feel of the rifle. It was so natural and I didn’t prompt you once. I—Jack, I think you have a serious talent for marksmanship.”
I scoff while taking off my goggles. “No.”
“Yes. I’m the instructor and I say so.” She stamps her foot, then seems surprised at herself for doing it. “Oh, you confuse me so bloody much.”
“How?”
“I don’t know.” She chews her bottom lip while scrutinizing me. “When I say you’re good at something, I kind of assume you would expect to be. Good at things. Don’t you have high expectations for yourself?” Her voice softens. “Or have I judged you completely wrong and I should just go stick my head in the toilet or something?”
My wink and a smile happen on command, but for the first time, it feels wrong on my face. “I think we’ve established what I’m good at.”
I think Katie gets me, right here in this moment. Or comes really close. She’s looking through her own personal rifle scope and seeing my target. Truthing me, the way only she has ever done. I’m stripped down and defenseless because of one transparent comment and I watch as knowledge trickles into her gorgeous eyes, see it soften her mouth at the edges.
Katie thinks she knows why I default to sex. And with her standing two feet away, so present and breathtaking, I want more than anything to hand her those confusing pieces of my puzzle and see what she can do with them.
Take them. Take them.
I don’t have a chance to say the words out loud, though, because she speaks first. “You’re showing me your teeth on purpose. The Big Bad Wolf doesn’t do that. He doesn’t bring secret umbrellas or carry backpacks, either. I shouldn’t have called you that.” She tips her head towards the range. “It’s up to you to establish what you’re good at. Not me. But I know you’re more.”
She blinks, as if coming out of a trance and starts to turn away. I’m paralyzed on the outside, but my chaotic insides are the exact opposite. How am I so . . . elevated when I’m stone-cold sober? I feel every breath that scrapes out of my lungs, the whiz of life rushing in my ears. I’m clearheaded enough to realize I can’t reach for Katie the way I reach for a bottle. Can’t use her to drown out this crushable optimism and numb myself instead, where I’ll be safer.
She’s given me this gift, though. Even if believing I’m good at something only lasts a little while, even if I wake up tomorrow and it’s all a dream . . . I need to thank her. Need to share how I feel with her. It’s an urge stronger than anything I can remember.
Above us, one of the fluorescent lights buzzes loudly, then goes out, dimming the room. Katie turns towards me with wide eyes and my body releases me from paralysis, allowing me to pull her into my arms.
“Thank you,” I whisper against her mouth, before we moan into the most insane kiss.
Chapter 8
Katie
Timid Katie isn’t available at the moment. This is bold, tries-new-things-like-kissing-very-attractive-boys Katie. And I like her. She gets to do things like wrap her legs around Jack’s waist and kiss him like her lips will vanish into thin air at midnight. Poof.
Oh my God, how did I hold off kissing him again so long? I’m like a child bingeing on sweets, except I’m an adult woman and instead of Mars bars, I’m desperately trying to get my fill of Jack’s mouth. He’s delicious and that’s putting it mildly. Last time we kissed, I detected something bitter on his tongue, but this time, he’s all hungry, manly, minty goodness and he’s giving it all to me. Tipping his head back and letting me taste him however I want from above, my legs cinched around his body like clamps.
It would be wise and cautious to tread slower with Jack. There are so many unknown things twisting under his surface, I can’t count them all or give them names. Am I crazy to think he wouldn’t mind it if I tried, though? This man, this devastatingly hot man, thought he’d blown his chance with me about five minutes after arriving. Unbelievable. And I could see plain on his face that he cared about that. That he’d let himself down somehow.
I can barely stand how women look at me long enough to close the deal.
So why does he close it? Does he think sex is all he’s good for? After the way he blew off my praise of his shooting skills, it seems like the only conclusion. I don’t like it. At all.
Pulling away is torture. “Jack, stop—”
“Aw, honey.” His hot groan bathes my lips. “Don’t say that.”
“I didn’t just come here for the kissing,” I say in a rush. “I . . .”
“What?”
I squeeze my eyes shut. “I wanted to see you.”
His swallow is loud enough to hear. “I . . . know. I think that’s why this feels so fucking good.” His expression is searching, a little incredulous. “And trust me, I wanted to see you worse.”
There’s no telling who dives back in first, but I can’t stop kissing him now that I’ve started again. Fully recovered from me vaulting onto his body, Jack’s skilled mouth begins knocking loose oxygen and brain cells, sending them scattering on the ground. Already, this is the closest I’ve come to sex and we’re fully clothed, but that’s not how Jack kisses me. He thrusts his tongue into my mouth like we’re naked, tasting every corner of me in one long lick, before drawing out and lapping at my bottom lip. Nipping it. Diving back in to divest me of anything resembling sense. One big hand invades my hair, the other slides down my back like it owns me. And very slowly, he rocks me, rocks me on the ridge behind his fly.
The flesh between my legs clenches—a hot, insistent squeeze—and it’s like Jack knows I’ve just been hit by a massive lust tidal wave. While his mouth continues to devastate me, his eyes open and lock with mine . . . and he rolls his hips. Rolls them twice, three times, dragging his bulge up and back underneath my quickening heat.
I tear our mouths apart with a gasp. “Wow.”
His mouth is wet, jaw slack when I pull away. Even his head pitches to the right, like he’s drunk on need. “Fucking right, wow. Get back here.”
“Brilliant.”
I catch the barest hint of his lips curving into a smile before I part my mouth against his, tempting him to taste me even deeper than before. And he does. His fingers twist in my hair and waistband, growing more aggressive by the second, his breath harshens, growls kindling in his throat. His upper body plows into my space, bending my top half backwards, while dragging my hips closer to his hardness. Grinding against me. God, I’m almost horizontal, my thighs wrapped tight around Jack, restless and writhing. And all the while his mouth is bruising mine, our teeth occasionally bumping in our haste to take.
“Fuck, Katie.” He breaks away from my mouth, dipping his head to plant a bite between my breasts, jerking my whole body with a moan. “What the hell are you doing to me, honey?”
“You took the words right out of my mouth,” I wheeze, the room spinning around me. “Must have been while you were kissing me.”
Jack’s eyebrows shoot up. “Did you just quote a Meatloaf song?”
“Yes.” I dive forwards and bury my face in the crook of his neck. “Kill me. Kill me now.”
His chest shakes with laughter. “I’ve got a better idea, but it’s not happening here.” He turns in a circle
, totally unaffected by the weight of me clinging to him. “I finally get you kissing me like you don’t want to stop and there’s not one damn surface around that isn’t made of concrete.”
“Why do you need a surf—I’m going to stop talking now.” Still hiding my face in his neck, I pat his shoulder. “Find a surface. I’ll just wait here.”
Jack groans. “So damn cute.” I’m jostled as he leaves the range and climbs the stairs, using an unbreakable forearm to keep me plastered against him. The faded scent of shampoo and aftershave is mouthwatering so close and I can’t help pressing my lips to Jack’s neck, teasing his flesh with my tongue and feeling his steps falter. “Just so we’re clear, this means you’ve decided the rules aren’t stopping us from spending time together while you’re here?”
The hopefulness in his voice tugs at me. “For once, I didn’t make a decision. I’m acting out of total spontaneity.” I snuggle closer and drag my tongue down the cord of his neck, smiling when he moans. “Is that okay with you?”
“If it’s your decision, I have to be.” A muscle jumps in his cheek. “I just hope you won’t change your mind tomorrow.”
We’ve reached the upstairs gymnasium now and Jack wastes no time dropping onto his knees, then laying me back on one of the leather mats. God, he’s extraordinary above me, propped on his hands and knees. Waiting. Waiting without breathing, as far as I can tell, his eyes an intense green. How could I resist spending time with this man? Walking away without getting to the center of him and exploring—maybe letting him explore me in the process? I don’t think I could stand letting the chance slip away.
“No, I don’t think I will change my mind.” His breath leaves him in one fell swoop, his smiling face dropping towards mine. “A mad love affair.”
Pausing, he sucks the breath back in. “What?”
“That’s one of the items on my Katie Conquers New York list.”
His head tilts, just a touch, but it might as well be earthquake fallout. “And before tonight, you actually thought that might happen with someone other than me?”
His arrogance is back and it makes me want to smile, but I purse my lips instead. “I still have a choice in the matter, don’t I?”
A short laugh. “You’re really testing the bonds of my feminism here, honey.” He curses. “I’m going to kiss you now, Katie. Consider your mad love affair checked off the list.”
I should protest, right? That high-handed male attitude is why I spent the last four years in solitude with nothing but Ross and Rachel to keep me company. But I kind of love it coming from Jack. His possessive growl as he melds our mouths together makes me feel free, instead of confined. Lust whips the heat in my stomach like an eggbeater until it’s liquid fire, spreading to the insides of my thighs and coating my belly. His weight presses down into me, like he’s testing to see how much I can take. More, more. And when he lets me have every ounce, we both gasp into the kiss. Because there’s no mistaking what the thickness nudging the juncture of my thighs means. When we were standing, the pressure was suggestive. When he rolls his hips and our lower bodies grind together, however, that is not a suggestion. It’s need. That first drag of his erection over the seam of my pants is slow, but the next pump is desperate, Jack breaking away from our kiss to grunt my name.
Oh my God. We’re still in our clothes. I imagine Jack naked, gritting his teeth and thrusting his hips and the most embarrassing whimper falls out of my mouth.
Or maybe not so embarrassing, because Jack zeroes in on me like I said something completely genius. “You’re right here with me, aren’t you? You’re feeling how good this is?”
“Yes.”
His amazing lips part mine, his tongue delving in to taste me and I feel that lick everywhere. Everywhere. “What do you want tonight? My mouth and fingers?” Those magic hips twist and drag between my splayed thighs, rubbing the fly of his jeans against my clitoris. “Or do you want me to unzip my jeans and fuck you here and now, honey? We can deal with that first rough one, so I can take my time with round two.”
Oh, okay . . . wow. My muscles clench, toes curling into the denim covering his calves as he pumps against the damp juncture of my thighs. I don’t think there is anything that can steal my focus when Jack is absorbing every ounce, but his words in the firing range trickle into my consciousness.
Afterwards, I can barely stand to look at myself.
Maybe I don’t understand why yet, but I know it would gut me if that happened.
“I want more, but . . . not that. Not yet.” I take a deep breath and push out the final bit of truth I’ve been keeping to myself. “Jack, I’m a virgin.”
His expression is almost comical, before he catches himself and clears the disbelief from his face. “A v-virgin. Okay.” It’s like I’m a lake of fire all of a sudden, prepared to scorch and possibly kill him, but his hungry expression says he still wants to jump in and confirm. Finally, he runs a warm hand down the side of my body, squeezing every few inches like he’s searching for something. “Do you guys come with a manual or what?”
My giggle catches me off guard. “Jack.”
“I’m kidding, Snaps. I know . . . I know someone’s first time needs to be special.” He plants a kiss on my nose, my forehead, but I think he’s trying to distract me from his concern. “Do you trust me?”
I’m astonished when the answer is clear right away. “Yes.”
And there it is. It’s the most incredible way anyone has ever looked at me. Jack’s eyes are still glazed with hunger, but when I say yes, appreciation warms his features, too, and he’s now a lovely combination of male lust and sweetness. My nerve endings clamour and sing with pleasure. All I want to do is soak him up, soak up everything he gives me. “Not a lot of people do, you know. Not the other instructors. Hell, not even my friends sometimes.” His eyebrows draw together. “Why would you?”
“Because you asked if I trust you, instead of telling me to. Classic tell.” I lick my lips and taste Jack. “And I really want to.”
“I really want that, too.” He shakes his head. “Jesus, you’re something.”
Every cell in my body shakes wildly when he hooks a thumb in my waistband, keeping thoughtful green eyes locked on mine as he tugs down my pants. Lower, lower until they’re bunched at my knees. Then . . . oh Jesus, then, he drags just the barest hint of his fingertips up the inside of my thigh, before giving the opposite leg the same treatment. By the time he finishes with both sides, I can feel slickness building between the folds of my flesh. My belly is shuddering up and down and I can’t look away from him. He’s trapped me.
“I can get on board with this,” I whisper.
Jack’s lips tick up at one corner. “I’m showing you where my mouth is going to go.”
Self-consciousness snags me, but I nod through it. “Oh, sure.”
“And trying to figure out if you’ve gone this far before.”
“Nope.”
“Hmm.” His eyes run over my face in the silence. As if maybe he’s awed by this awkward creature that’s fallen into his lap. But I know that’s not true when he speaks again in a patient tone. “Talk me through why you’re nervous.”
If he thinks I don’t notice him sliding down my panties, he’s dead wrong, but I try to focus on answering. “Well I don’t have a lot of girlfriends, so I haven’t really talked to anyone about this, but I think every girl probably has the same worry. At least the first time?” It’s either the mortification or the slippery glide of his fingers along the seam of my sex turning me red. I don’t know which. “And I think maybe I’m worried I’ll be . . . wrong somehow. Or you won’t like how it looks. Down there.”
Jack arches an eyebrow. “Does it look like your pussy?”
A hiccuping laugh escapes. “I’m fairly sure.”
He hits me with that pirate smile. “Then I’m already in love.”
Something sharp turns right in the center of me, like a key opening a door. All I can do is gasp through the emotion shiver
ing through my insides as Jack eases up my tank top. Giving me a final reassuring kiss on the mouth, he starts moving down my body, like a prowling sex god. His tongue skates between my breasts, one of his palms abrading my nipple through my thin sports bra, the touch so light and yet it yanks an invisible wire inside me. My back arches like I have no control, lifting right into the descent of Jack’s mouth, his greedy licking tongue.
When his hands bracket my waist, squeezing, his thumbs pressing into that sensitive spot just inside my hip bones, I jerk upwards, my body smacking back down onto the mat.
“Goddamn, Katie.” Jack whips off his T-shirt, revealing a tight, golden climbing wall of muscle, dropping my mouth open. “If my thumbs are making you shake, you’re going to love what I can do with my tongue.” In one fluid motion, he removes my pants and underwear the remaining distance and drops down onto his stomach. I feel his breath on my damp flesh and—“Uh-oh,” he says, his voice gravelly.
My fingers dig into the mat. “What?”
“Your pussy.” His tongue slides through my sensitive lips. “It’s too perfect.”
Relief swoops in. For a split second. Then another swipe of Jack’s tongue turns me into a writhing jumble of sensation. “That doesn’t s-sound like a problem.”
“Hell no, it’s not a problem,” Jack rasps, nudging my clit with his upper lip. “I just hate to make a mess out of something so beautiful.” Another nudge. Another. Followed by a long, fluid lick. “Actually, fuck that. I’m going to love every fucking second.”
Maybe I’m not so afraid of the Big Bad Wolf side of Jack, is the ridiculous thought that tumbles through my mind. But it’s sideswiped and run off the road when Jack tosses my legs over his bare shoulders and essentially begins making out with my already tightening flesh. His forehead is creased, eyes clamped shut as he works his lips and tongue against me, over and over, reminding me of the treatment he gives my mouth when we kiss. Complete and utter dedication to tasting every part of me he can reach, and then some.
