by Luke Young
He scoffed. “Hell, I’m surprised you didn’t let her take it for a spin.”
“Now, you’re just being ridiculous.” She shot him a frown.
“Yeah, I’m being ridiculous.”
“You are a little.” She placed her hand on his arm. “And I’m sorry. She showed me a picture of her boyfriend’s and—” She shut her mouth when she saw the horrified expression on his face.
“So now you’re looking at dick pics!”
“Oh come on, like you never look at pictures of naked women!”
“That’s different.” He sneered. “I’m a man, I have to do that. You’re supposed to be more level headed and less sex obsessed.”
“I didn’t do it for some sexual thrill. She just showed me and well, we had a couple glasses of wine and I remembered you made that amazing replica for me.” She sidled up to him and put a finger on his chest, running it slowly down to his abdomen. “I think you’re so sexy and your penis is so amazing. I guess, I feel comfortable with her and wanted to show you off a little.”
“Well, that’s sweet in a somewhat deranged and bizarre way, but next time maybe just show a snap shot of my face instead of an exact replica of my dick, okay?”
“Okay. I will never show anyone it again.”
“Good.” He sighed. “What time are the boys getting dropped off?”
“Eight.”
“And what time is your new little friend leaving?” he asked with a slight edge remaining in his voice.
“I don’t know.” She kissed him on the cheek then said, “Oh, you taste a little sweaty.”
“I didn’t get a chance to shower since I gave a couple lessons today,” he replied grumpily.
“I like it.”
“Okay, well, I’m going to take my dinner up to my room and I’ll let you two do whatever.”
“No, why?”
“Why?” His eyes bugged out of his head. “She knows what my dick looks like. She held it in her hands. I really don’t think I can hang out with her now. I mean, I can’t even look her in the eye.”
“You’re being silly.”
“Am I?”
“You are,” she said. “Have a glass of wine and relax.”
He refused to look at her and curled his lips into a frown.
“Hey…” Her eyes brightened. “Victoria actually held your penis more than once and you can be in the same room with her with no problem.”
“That’s different.”
“How is that different?”
“She’s… she’s, like a sister to me or something,” he stammered then frowned. “I don’t know, it just is.”
“A sister?” She narrowed her eyes. “I don’t know what kind of family you grew up in… Wait, I do know.”
They stood gazing at each other for a few moments neither giving an inch until Jillian finally sighed and said, “Look, eat with us. I promise she doesn’t have an issue and we won’t mention it. I’ll make it worth your while later.”
“How?”
“Well, I’ll give you one of those back massages where I, you know, give you that handjob from behind and touch you everywhere.” She shot him a sexy look.
“Will you really?” He shot her a skeptical look. “You usually have good intentions then your hands get tired.”
“I will. I promise.”
“You know what…” He paused a moment thinking then frowned. “Everything with us is sex, sex, sex. You know I’m not just a piece of meat.”
She held back a laugh. “You’re serious?”
“I am.”
“Okay… What are you saying?”
“I mean, does every compromise have to be made with some promise of a sex act?”
“No, it doesn’t.”
“Good, because you know I like just being with you. I don’t need you to do this or that to have a good time.”
“Okay, so what do you want instead?” She moved close to him, gazing into his eyes, smirking. “What do you want to do?”
“You could watch one of my movies with me.”
“Sure. I could do that. Which one?”
“Austin Powers. Maybe the second one. That’s my favorite.”
Her smile faded. “Um, well, you know I don’t like silly comedies.”
“You laughed out loud the first time you saw it.”
“I did in a few places, but it’s not the kind of movie I want to watch over and over.”
“I know.” He added sarcastically, “It’s not like Sleepless in Seattle or anything.”
“It’s not.”
“Seriously, how many times can you watch Tom Hanks run out of that elevator looking for his son and finding Meg Ryan?”
She looked away in a dream like state. “I could watch that like every day.”
“It’s a good movie but come on.”
“Okay, maybe once a week.” She cocked her head, shrugging. “Okay, I’ll watch your movie.”
“Good.”
She kissed him on the cheek. “I love you.”
“I love you too. You know, after the movie we could…” He shot her a sexy smile. “… just see what happens.”
“What do you mean?” She held back a laugh.
“If you wanted to do that thing…” He tilted his head. “… you could.”
“Okay.” She chuckled. “We’ll see Mr. I’m-not-a-piece-of-meat.”
They shared a laugh then suddenly his smile faded. “But hey where is it?”
“Where’s what?”
He knitted his brows together. “You know, IT!”
“Oh…” She bounced up and down on her heels, grimacing. “I’m not sure.”
“Okay, I’ll go get a glass of wine and chug it while you find it and put it away. I just don’t want my penis to be the centerpiece on the table if you know what I mean.”
“You are adorable.” She kissed him on the lips passionately then whispered in the sexiest voice ever, “I think something fun might just happen after the movie.”
“Cool.”
She playfully patted his ass then headed away on her desperate search.
31
Ten minutes later, with the replica finally located and locked away in the couples’ sex box, Kathleen and Brian were seated in the dining room. After Jillian properly introduced Kathleen to her husband, she headed to the kitchen, leaving them glancing at each other awkwardly.
Brian chugged back half of his glass of wine then smiled. “I’m sorry about my reaction earlier. I was just a little shocked to see you out there with, um, you know…”
“Don’t worry about it. We obviously were not thinking clearly or respecting your feelings.”
“No, it’s fine. I overreacted like I usually do when someone is holding an exact replica of my erection in their hands.” He raised his eyebrows.
“Oh, so that happens a lot?” She held back a giggle.
He put on a straight face. “Sure, she’s showed it to the mailwoman, the UPS guy… oh, and most of our neighbors.”
“Well, obviously she’s proud of it and just wants to show you off.”
“Okay.” He shook his head with a smirk. “That’s probably enough jokes about that.”
Jillian entered the room carrying a plate full of Chicken Piccata. “What are you guys smiling about?”
Brian said, “We’re just talking about the thing out by the pool when I came home and…”
“Really?” Jillian placed the entrée down then took a seat. “So are we all good now?”
“We are and we decided to talk about something else,” Kathleen said.
“Okay, good,” Jillian began. “I hope you like chicken.”
“It looks amazing.” Grabbing the serving fork, Kathleen skewered a small breast and placed it on her plate.
“She really is a great cook,” Brian began. “She has so many talents.”
“Don’t let him fool you, he’s a better cook than I am,” Jillian said.
“Just breakfast and desserts for me mainly.”
Brian passed Kathleen the salad. “I don’t do many dinners.”
Their attractive guest spooned some salad into her bowl. “This all looks amazing.”
“What about your chicken wings, chicken cheese steaks and enchiladas?” Jillian said.
“Okay, I have a couple good things I can make,” Brian admitted.
After cutting a bite of chicken, Kathleen slipped it into her mouth. “Wow, I haven’t had a home cooked meal in a few weeks. This is delicious.”
“Thank you.” Jillian took a bite.
“You two make an adorable couple.” Kathleen took a sip of wine then noticed a picture of the twins on the sideboard. She beamed. “Oh, my God and they are so, so cute.”
Jillian followed her gaze and her eyes lit up. “They are.”
“Can I please see it?” Kathleen pointed to the picture.
Reaching back, Brian grabbed the photo and handed it over.
Kathleen studied it wearing a huge smile. “Adorable. But two babies, that must be a lot of work.”
“One. Two. What’s the difference?” Brian shrugged holding back a smile.
“Believe me there’s a difference.” Jillian frowned. “Especially if they both want the same thing at the same time.”
“I know, but it’s not like we have five or six,” Brian began. “Now that would be really hard.”
Jillian nodded. “True, they aren’t too fussy and usually take turns needing something.”
“I was pregnant last year, but, um,” Kathleen began with her words trailing off as she fought to control her emotions.
“Oh, sorry to hear that.” Jillian paused a moment, a sympathetic expression spreading over her face. “We had a lot of trouble getting pregnant.”
A tear slipped down Kathleen’s cheek and she wiped it away. “Sorry, it’s just still sort of raw for me.”
“The desire to be a mother can be a strong one,” Jillian said.
“Yeah, but look at me bringing you guys down.” Kathleen painted on a smile. “Let’s talk about something else.”
After an awkward moment of silence, Brian glanced to his wife then asked, “Kathleen, how do you like working on the series?”
“It’s a lot of fun. Everyone is so nice and it’s so funny.”
“Good, I hear you are doing brilliant work,” Brian said.
“What a great character.” Sighing, Kathleen brought a hand to her chest. “It’s such a great role. I just hope I can do it justice.”
“You are,” Jillian said as she skewered a cucumber with her fork. “It’s perfect for you.”
“Wait till you meet the real Victoria.” He widened his eyes. “We should get those two together at some point. I think she would approve of you.”
“Yeah…” Kathleen took a sip of wine. “Why’s that?”
Brian said, “Well, let’s just say that Victoria has had some strong opinions about the actresses that were cast and recast for both the movie and the series.”
Jillian rolled her eyes. “Yes, she’s been very vocal about a couple of the choices.”
“But you meet all her criteria.” Brian took a sip from his glass. “Gorgeous face. Killer body. Great comedy timing, so I hear… not to mention those big, beautiful breasts.”
Kathleen broke into a chuckle.
“Brian!” Jillian scolded.
“Okay,” he grumbled, picking up his wineglass. “You two can ogle my replica, but I can’t mention her breasts. That doesn’t seem fair.”
“He’s right and it’s not like I’ve kept them hidden in my career.” Kathleen frowned slightly. “Well, as short and as unsuccessful as it’s been.”
“I know that big things are ahead for you.” Jillian took a sip from her glass.
“I agree.” Brian took a bite of chicken then he shook his head, with his eyes closed. “Ummm. Jillian, this is your best yet I think.”
“Thank you,” Jillian replied.
Thirty minutes later Jillian and Kathleen were chatting in the great room while Brian finished cleaning up from dinner. Wearing a goofy smile, he walked into the room carrying the Austin Powers DVD. “Here it is.”
“Oh, God.” Jillian rolled her eyes. “He already has it out.”
“What’s that?”
“A movie she promised to watch with me tonight.”
Upon seeing the front cover, Kathleen smiled. “I love those movies. Two and three more than one, but they are all good.”
“I know, right?” Brian looked to his wife. “You see they aren’t just boy movies.”
Jillian returned a frown. “I guess.”
“There is talk of a forth movie,” Kathleen began. “I hope they do finally make it. I’d love to be in it. Would love to meet Mike Myers. He’s so talented.”
“He is good,” Brian agreed.
Kathleen wore a dreamy expression as she said, “In the second movie when Austin falls out the window with the woman that’s trying to kill him and he lands on her body. I just love that part.”
“Me too.” Brian looked to Jillian with his eyes wide. “He says, ‘why won’t—”
”’—you die!’” Kathleen finished his sentence and the two shared a laugh.
Jillian looked on chuckling, skeptically. “I’m not sure I would watch it with you two. He constantly says the lines out loud. He knows it by heart and it drives me—”
“Me too!” Kathleen slid to the edge of her seat and held out her hand. “Can I see the case?”
Brian handed Kathleen the DVD box then smiled. “I think I’ve got a little crush on you right now.”
“Okay, that’s enough wine for you.” Jillian shot her husband a pointed look.
“I’m kidding, but you know I wish you shared my love of certain movies,” Brian directed to his wife.
“We can’t have everything in common, that would be boring,” Jillian replied
“You’re right.”
Looking up from the box, Kathleen shook her head. “You guys are cute together.”
“We are. It’s a little sickening.” Brian frowned.
“Maybe a little,” Jillian agreed.
The doorbell rang. Brian rose to his feet and headed toward the front of the house.
Jillian followed behind him. “Must be the boys.”
When they returned, each was cradling one adorable toddler, sleeping with their little heads on their parent’s shoulders. Both boys wore matching blue and white striped onesie pajamas. Smiling, Brian whispered, “Her parents took off. They looked exhausted. Just handed them off with barely a word.”
Kathleen’s jaw dropped open and she cocked her head, her expression melting. “My God, they’re even cuter than their picture.
“I can’t believe they’re sleeping this early,” Brian said. “We might be in for it later.”
“This is Dylan.” Jillian nodded her head to the one she was holding, then to the other twin. “And that’s Griffin.”
“How do you tell them apart?”
Brian said, “Griffin’s head is a little bigger and flatter. Dylan has sort of an apple head.”
Jillian nodded. “Yep that’s how we do it. You see Griffin was on the bottom, head down and Dylan was on top while I was pregnant.”
Brian made a face. “Dylan was standing on him.”
Jillian said, “I guess we should put them in their cribs.”
Brian placed a soft kiss on the side of Griffin’s head.
Studying Kathleen’s mesmerized expression, Jillian said, “You want to hold one and carry him up to bed?”
“Really?” Kathleen asked.
“Sure. It takes a lot to wake them up when they’re like this.” Jillian carefully placed Dylan on Kathleen’s shoulder and patted his back softly.
Kathleen’s mouth dropped open with a silent gasp and she whispered, “Oh my God, he smells so good. I love that baby smell.”
Jillian brushed a hair from Dylan’s eye and gently kissed his forehead. When she pulled back she watched Kathleen cradling her little boy. The
look on her face expressed how badly she wanted to be a mother. The way she patted his back gently as she continued to drink in his baby scent touched something deep inside of Jillian. A moment later as a tear fell from Jillian’s eye, she quickly turned away. She didn’t want Kathleen to catch her emotions getting the best of her in this bittersweet moment. She didn’t want to risk once again saddening her new friend.
Brian whispered, “Just follow me.”
Jillian stayed behind because she thought she’d fall to pieces watching Kathleen put Dylan down, especially if Kathleen herself shed a tear. And when Brian and Kathleen returned a few minutes later they found Jillian sitting on the soda clutching a tissue secretly in her palm.
“Would you like to stay and watch the movie?” Jillian asked.
“No, I couldn’t,” Kathleen replied. “I don’t want to interrupt your date night.”
“Don’t be silly. We’d love to have you and I’ll bet he’d really enjoy someone laughing in all the places that he does.” Jillian rolled her eyes.
“You sure?” Kathleen asked.
“Yes, it will be nice to not feel like an idiot while I watch for a change. And I promise I won’t say too many lines. Maybe just five. Just my favorites.”
“Yeah, me too.” Kathleen giggled.
“Good. Popcorn anyone?” Jillian rose to her feet.
“Definitely.” Brian grabbed the DVD from the table and headed toward the player.
The three watched the movie with Jillian snuggling on Brian’s shoulder and falling asleep about half way through. After glancing at the sleeping Jillian, Brian and Kathleen shared a look and went on enjoying the rest of the film, whispering only a few funny lines between them.
When it was over, Brian woke his beautiful wife, they walked Kathleen to the front door and watched as she climbed into her car and drove away. Brian took a raincheck on the after movie activities promised by the love of his life and the two fell into an exhausted sleep.
32
Although Jim knew Victoria was meeting with the producers that day, she didn’t tell him much other than the meeting went well. She also stretched the truth a bit by telling him she was still waiting for the final details of the offer. She figured she’d let the lawyers have a look at everything first. She wanted to be sure that it was a good deal before she took on the enormous task of getting her young husband on board with this project. A project that she very much wanted to do. As much as she craved the attention, she knew it would be an intrusive and life altering event.
