by Katie May
“You’d miss me too much.”
He gave me a dry look and retorted, “I wouldn’t miss—”
A cough rattled my body, blood erupting from my mouth, and I fell
forward as my legs failed me. Bash cursed, the teasing atmosphere instantly
diminishing as my mates looked at me with worry and fear. Before I could
even get myself balanced, my body was scooped up into strong, muscular
arms, and Bash strode towards the shed-like cottage.
“I can walk,” I murmured…weakly, though. We all knew I was full of
shit.
“And I can stop being an asshole for longer than a minute,” Bash quipped
angrily, though I knew the anger wasn’t directed at me. “Now shut up and let
me coddle you.”
“You shut up.” I stubbornly crossed my arms over my chest and scowled,
even as his own lips twitched in amusement.
“You know, if you need something to occupy that dirty mouth of
yours…”
“You offering me your cock, Bash-hole?” I blinked up at him innocently.
“Are you sure I won’t lose it in my mouth? After all, it’s pretty small. I don’t
want to accidentally swallow—”
He growled sharply, his arms holding me even tighter against his chest as
Killian opened the door to the cottage. “I can assure you, my naughty mate,
that it’s not small. You saw it once. Remember?”
I pretended to think about it as we entered a tiny, desolate room with very
minimal furniture and a woodsy feel to it. “I didn’t have my microscope, so
I’m not sure—”
He placed his hand over my mouth and leveled me with a hard stare.
“You’re mean.”
I pulled his hand away with a raised brow. “You’re mean,” I retorted
immediately.
“I’ll show you mean—”
“Enough! Paco wants to see the little female. Yes, Paco see,” the crazed
mage said, gesturing us forward and towards his bed.
I eyed a pancake resting in the center of his bed, and my eyebrows shot to
my hairline, especially when Killian moved protectively in front of me and
Bash and stuttered, “L-let’s put her somewhere else.”
I so did not want to know.
Bash eventually sat on the floor, keeping me in his arms until I was
positioned comfortably in his lap. I didn’t necessarily like this vulnerable
position, especially knowing how powerful Paco truly was, but I didn’t dare
voice my discomforts. I felt so weak and tired, my body heavier than chunks
of lead.
“Paco sees you used his potion.” The mage turned towards Dair, who
stood against the wall, his golden arms folded over his chest. When Dair
nodded, his jaw clenched ever so slightly, the mage added, “Will wear off.
Need to remember that. Paco only has one jar and will only have one jar. Too
difficult for Paco to waste his time on making. And once you run out of
special juice…” He trailed off with a sad shake of his head, and Dair’s hands
balled into fists.
I understood Paco’s meaning well enough—the second Dair ran out of
whatever substance was in that jar, he would be confined back to his
wheelchair. He would have to use it sparingly until we could figure out how
to get more. We could demand Paco give us his recipe and hope Bash could
recreate it, but I had a feeling it was more difficult than that.
“What do you need Paco’s help with? The female?” The mage leaned
down in front of me, his cock brushing against my leg until Killian growled
sharply. The sound was so primordial and possessive that my head snapped in
his direction.
He blushed, ducking his head and shrugging his shoulders sheepishly.
“Sorry. I don’t like men who aren’t your mates touching you.”
“Join the fucking club,” Bash muttered angrily, and though I couldn’t see
his expression, I had the distinct feeling that his gaze was fixed on how close
Paco was to me, despite the fact his cock was no longer touching my leg.
Gah. I was going to need to burn my skin to rid myself of the feeling of
his slimy snake cock.
“You sick, yeah? Paco sees you sick.” He placed a sweaty hand to my
forehead, and I resisted the urge to recoil. I could see my mates didn’t like
this anymore than I did, because Dair immediately straightened from where
he was leaning against the wall, Killian growled sharply yet again, Ryland
practically hissed like a feral cat, and Bash’s arms tightened around me. Even
Jax, who’d been staring absently out the window, whipped his head in my
direction, his eyes flashing with an emotion I couldn’t quite name.
But Paco didn’t seem to mind the vitriol spewing at him from all
directions. Instead, he shut his eyes and began to hum under his breath, his
body swaying from side to side as he lost himself to the music.
“You trust this man?” Dair whispered urgently to Bash, and though my
back was to him, I could feel his nod, his chin touching the top of my head
for the briefest moment.
“Yes. I…I know him.”
“You keep saying that,” Killian pointed out. “But you haven’t explained
how.”
“Well…” Bash sighed heavily, just as Paco’s hand moved from my
forehead to my nose, his fingers digging into my eyes and his thumb touching
my lips. I gagged, attempting to pull my head away, but Paco grunted and
held me tighter. “This is my grandpa.”
Silence descended as we all processed this new revelation. My men stared
at him with varying degrees of disbelief while I tried not to breathe too
deeply, considering the fact I had a fucking smelly hand blocking my nostrils.
“Your grandpa?” Killian squeaked out. “Y-you mean the former mage
king?”
“The one and only.” Bash sighed tiredly, smoothing his hands up and
down my arms. It appeared to be an almost absentminded gesture, as if he
wanted to memorize the feel of my skin beneath his palms. As if he wanted to
assure himself I was still here and alive.
“The former mage king…”
I tried to recall what I knew of him, but my mind came up blank. All I
knew for certain was that he wasn’t evil. At least not as evil as his son. The
former kings had ruled the kingdoms with iron fists, but they hadn’t had
human work camps like they did now. The humans hadn’t been enslaved and
fed on.
That wasn’t to say there hadn’t been any bigotry or speciesism, but it
hadn’t been as prominent as it was today.
“Paco needs silence,” the former king declared, his lips thinning beneath
his scraggly white beard.
My men immediately stopped talking, their focus intense on Paco’s hand
on my face. When he finally reopened his eyes and released me, I breathed a
sigh of relief, shifting as far away from him as my position in Bash’s lap
would allow.
“You poisoned,” Paco declared with a wide grin, as if we would be so
thrilled that he’d stated the obvious.
Bash’s voice was curt when he responded, “Yes, we know that. How do
we heal her?”
White eyebrows retreated into his hairline as he stared at us. “Heal her?”
“Yes,” Bash gritted out
. “I know that they have the cure in the palace, but
I was hoping…”
“You want Paco to give the human an antidote,” he said in understanding,
nodding his head rapidly. “Paco understands. Yes, Paco understands.” And
then he just continued to nod and blink without saying a goddamn word.
“So?” Dair demanded, and Paco spun towards him, as if forgetting we
weren’t alone.
“So?” Paco quirked an eyebrow, and Dair scoffed, throwing his hands up
in the air and pacing the room.
“This is ridiculous. He’s not going to be able to help us, Bash. We’re
wasting our time when we should be heading to the Mage Kingdom and—”
“Mage Kingdom don’t have antidote. No more antidote. Paco can help,”
the white-haired mage insisted. “But Paco needs ingredients.”
Okay, now we were getting somewhere…
“Ingredients,” I reiterated, shooting a concerned look at first Dair and
then Killian. Bash’s arms were practically iron bands around my waist, and I
knew he had no intention of releasing me anytime soon.
Paco scratched absently at his chin before nodding once more. “Yes, Paco
has all of the ingredients. Paco can make antidote.”
“For fuck’s sake…” Bash murmured in irritation.
“So you can save Z?” Killian’s voice was hoarse with hope.
But that hope shattered with Paco’s next words.
“No.” He shook his head from side to side erratically as my heart
crumbled into dust. “In order for antidote to work, Z needs to die.”
THIRTEEN
Z
The spell was simple enough, at least according to Bash, who’d
received a copy of it from his grandfather. All of the ingredients we
needed were in the cottage.
The problem came from the end of the spell that specified that I had to be
dead for exactly one minute before the antidote could be administered.
“Nope. Fuck this. Not happening.” Bash tossed the book against the wall,
his chest heaving and hands clenching into fists.
“Bash…” I began, but he whirled on me, fire sparking in his eyes.
“You’re not fucking dying, Z!” he bellowed. “I’m not allowing that to
happen.”
“We don’t have a choice,” I said softly, venturing a step closer to him like
one would a cornered animal. His eyes ate up the distance between us,
darkness flooding his features, but he didn’t move to grab me or pull me into
his arms. He just stood there, glaring and panting and heaving. “Even if we
went to the palace and found the antidote there—”
“Which Paco insists is no longer there,” Dair added in a subdued voice.
“—I’d still have to die for it to work.”
“He wants to inject you with more fucking poison!” Bash raged,
stomping towards me until his hands landed on my shoulders. Despite the
anger in his eyes, his grip was soft and comforting. Protective. “He wants to
kill you even faster.”
“He needs to do this, Bash.” I gripped his wrists, removing his hands
from my shoulders and placing them on my waist instead. “I need to die
naturally from the poison and be administered the serum after exactly a
minute. And we have less than two days to do it.”
“I can’t…” His voice broke as he pressed his forehead against my own. “I
can’t lose you. I can’t…I can’t watch you in agony, baby. I can’t.”
“I know.” I lifted my hands to his cheek, loving the way his stubble
brushed against my palms. “But we don’t have a choice.”
My words were the wrong ones to say. The tenderness I could see in his
eyes vanished as quickly as it came, leaving me feeling oddly bereft, like my
soul wasn’t quite complete without that softness permeating it.
“No,” he hissed out, shouldering past me. “I refuse to believe that.”
“Bash!” I called out to his retreating back as he all but shoved Paco to the
side and stomped out the door. If the giant was concerned at all, he didn’t
show it, simply turning back to one of the two potions he was brewing and
humming happily beneath his breath.
“We’ll check on him,” Killian said, nodding towards Dair to join him.
“Jax, stay with her. Ryland, stay with him.” He glanced pointedly in Paco’s
direction.
When Dair looked like he was going to protest, Killian grabbed him by
the ear and all but dragged him out. I couldn’t help but snort. Apparently,
Killian was becoming more dominant by the day as he grew into his incubus
powers.
I couldn’t help but find that insanely attractive.
But I was also grateful for him, because he knew what I needed even
before I did—alone time with Jax. Since we saved him from Aaliyah, we
hadn’t had a chance to slow down and just talk. Everything had been so
chaotic that we hadn’t found time to catch out breaths.
Now, we had nothing to do but wait, and I was determined to break
through the walls erected around my sweet mate.
“Walk with me?” I asked Jax, who was still staring out the window. He
glanced in my direction, furrowed his brows, and then nodded once,
accepting the hand I’d offered. Paco gazed at us curiously, scratching at his
balls, but he didn’t stop us as we stepped outside into the rapidly setting sun.
It wouldn’t be long until night fell…and until we found ourselves with one
day left to return to the capital.
I couldn’t see Bash, Dair, or Killian, so I guided Jax towards a pathway
cutting through the forest of trees. I had no idea if it was a natural walkway or
one Paco had made, but I found there were very minimal obstacles to hinder
us.
I kept my eyes peeled for any threats heading our way, though I knew
Aaliyah would take the chance to regroup. Attacking us back-to-back had
never been her style, though that didn’t stop my hand from tightening on the
hilt of my blade tucked into the waistband of my pants.
We walked in silence, the only sounds coming from the rippling of wind
against the boughs and a stream of water somewhere farther down. It was
there we headed, Jax’s hand warm in mine, until we stopped at a tiny river
cutting through the forest in smooth, curved lines. A large rock sat directly
adjacent to the shoreline, and I led Jax there, perching myself on the edge and
patting the spot beside me.
Jax joined me without protest, pulling his knees up to his chest and
wrapping one arm around them. His other hand remained tangled with mine.
Silence settled between us, but it wasn’t uncomfortable. I didn’t think a
silence between me and my mates could ever be.
I watched him out of the corner of my eye, once again in awe of his
perfect features and light brown hair.
His chest heaved as he took a heavy breath before he turned towards me,
rendering me speechless with the force of his gaze.
“I’m not crazy,” he whispered brokenly, a sob getting caught in his throat.
“I’m not.”
“I don’t think you are.” I shifted even closer to him on the rock until my
thigh touched the curve of his ass.
He blinked rapidly, pulling his gaze off of me to stare into the distance.
His grip on my hand tightened, though I didn’t dare pull away. He could
break every bone in my body, and I would still grip him just as fiercely as he
held me. I imagined my touch might’ve been the only thing stopping him
from metaphorically jumping head-first over the highest cliff he could find.
“Everyone thinks I’m insane, and maybe…maybe I am.” He slowly
released his legs and brought his closed fist to his forehead. “Sometimes, I
can see things perfectly and know that I’m okay. That you’re here. But other
times…”
“Other times?” I whispered when it became apparent he wasn’t going to
finish.
“Other times, I see shadows and monsters and blood. They’re
everywhere, Z, and they terrify me.”
“Oh, Jax.” Without giving myself a second to think, I crawled into his lap
and held him tightly. I wanted to hold all of his broken pieces together and
make him whole with nothing but the strength of my love. But I knew that
wasn’t possible. Not yet.
“I don’t know who I am anymore,” he whispered against my hair as he
rocked us back and forth.
I pulled away and gripped his chin, praying that he saw the sincerity in
my gaze. “You’re Jax. You’re sweet and perfect and my mate and…I love
you.”
He blinked at me slowly, almost as if he hadn’t quite understood my
words, as wonderment crossed his face.
“You…love me?”
My throat clogged, turning impossibly tight, but I forced myself to nod.
I’d almost lost him, and I vowed to myself I wouldn’t let another day go
without telling him how I felt. And what I felt…
Was love.
So much fucking love for this broken, scarred man before me. The older
me would’ve been terrified by the strength of my emotions, but the new me,
the one broken down by flames and reforged into something far greater,
relished in these feelings. These feelings for them.
My men.
My mates.
My loves.
I would protect them with every fiber of my being, and if that somehow
led to my death, then so be it. But I would die with a smile on my face and
the knowledge that my mates knew and felt the strength of my love.
I didn’t think it was possible for someone like me to love again, not after
everything I’d endured. My parents’ deaths. Lin’s disappearance. S’s death…
