Edge of Something More

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Edge of Something More Page 10

by Andi Loveall


  Raven was even worse, always making passive-aggressive comments about how he and Cora were both Gemini and how they both were creative souls, or asking all sorts of questions about what sort of girls he liked and what he thought about relationships. It was so embarrassing that he could only answer “depends” or “not sure” to most of them.

  Then, as Wednesday approached, the teasing began.

  “Devin, are you looking forward to tomorrow?” Panky asked, her voice calm and collected as if she were interviewing him for a news program. “We’ve been hearing that Cora has a lot to teach you about the garden.”

  “Oh boy, oh boy,” Lucius agreed in a funny voice. “You’re gonna know about the garden after this. After this, you just might be a botanist.”

  Devin had to laugh. “God, I hope so.”

  He wasn’t sure what prompted these claims, but either way, Wednesday meant an entire day spent with Cora in the gardens. It glowed on the horizon like an approaching firestorm of goodness. He decided that on Wednesday, he was making a move no matter what.

  When he finally awoke that morning, it was hot—just like his aching balls. He gave himself a good scrub in the shower and got shaved clean and nice. As he was about to head down the hill, Lucius came out of the kitchen, holding out a piece of paper.

  “Hey brother,” he said. “I’ve jotted down some information I found online about the reproductive nature of vascular plants. I just thought you might need it.”

  Cora was waiting in the vegetable garden, looking like an angel in the morning light.

  “Hey you,” she said, squirting some water into the air and leaning back as the droplets rained down upon her. “It’s hot today, isn’t it?”

  “Morning,” he said, trying out the aloof voice again. “Yes … very.”

  “Get yourself a hose,” she said.

  He did as he was told, getting started at the other side of the garden, making his way back to meet her in the middle.

  Growing up, watering the plants in his mother’s garden was the only chore he never protested. It made him feel calm and separated from everything. He loved the way rainbows would appear when he held the hose a certain way, or the scent that emanated from the wet dirt as the plants glistened in the sunlight. Sometimes, when the weather was hot and she was in a particularly good mood, his mother let him and Michael squirt each other with the hose, and he always loved that too.

  He looked up, catching Cora staring at him. She smiled and turned away. The air was thick between them, filled with delicious tension.

  He flicked the hose in her direction.

  “Hey!”

  “What? What happened?”

  “Try that again and see what happens.”

  “Okay,” he said, putting on a devious grin. Before he could take two steps, a blast of cold wetness sent him stumbling backward.

  “Agh,” he spattered. “I didn’t know you had that gun-sprayer thingy on yours!”

  “I warned you,” she said, holding it up. “This baby has five settings.”

  “Damn,” he said, rubbing his face. “You shot it right in my eye.”

  Her smile faded.

  “I’m sorry,” she said, coming over. “Are you okay?”

  “Look,” he said, stretching his eyelid open. “Is it red? What do you see?”

  “I don’t know, it looks okay—”

  She shrieked as he snatched her hose and turned it on her.

  “Oh!” He laughed. “I see someone who just got played.”

  She ran back to the other side of the yard, soaking wet.

  “You play dirty,” she said.

  “You’re damn right I do.”

  “Now I’m not gonna talk to you for the rest of the time.”

  “You’re talking to me now.”

  “Not after this sentence.”

  “Yeah?”

  She was quiet.

  “Okay,” he said. “I won’t talk either then. Not for the rest of the time. Not after this sentence.”

  They watered, and he whistled as he worked. He couldn’t remember the name, but it was some beautiful love ballad from the ’80s—he knew that much. He also knew Cora liked it. She looked like she was dying to speak, but she stuck to her guns.

  A few minutes later, they were done. They wrapped up the hoses and put them away, smiling at each other.

  “Do you want to go up to the house?” she said, starting to walk. “Take a break in the sun?”

  “You talked.”

  “Go screw yourself,” she said. “I talk when I please.”

  “Good,” he said. “And yes. I like breaks.”

  They headed down the hill.

  “I’ll get you for that water thing,” she said. “Just you wait.”

  “I have to wait?” He circled around her, doing little jabs like a boxer. “Come on, I want you to get me now.”

  “No way. I’m gonna wait until you forget. And then bam!”

  “You do that, and I might have to launch a tickle attack.”

  “I’ll run away.”

  “Nope. I’ll hold you down so you can’t get away.”

  “You wouldn’t.”

  “I so would—as I suspect you’ll soon find out.”

  “Do it then. I suspect I can take you.”

  “No. I’m gonna wait until you forget. And then bam!”

  She narrowed her eyes at him. “You think you’re real clever, don’t you?”

  He climbed up onto the sunny picnic table. “I would say the extent of my cleverness should be obvious by now except you haven’t seen the extent.”

  “I’ve seen enough.”

  “Aren’t you going to join me?”

  “No. I don’t trust you anymore.”

  “Come on. I promise not to do anything annoying in the next five minutes.”

  “Swear on your grandma’s life?”

  “I swear on … someone else’s grandma’s life. Someone whose grandma might die soon anyway.”

  “You’re awful,” she said, laughing. “Don’t say things like that.”

  “Stop laughing at me for being awful,” he said. “And I’ll stop.”

  She smiled. After a second’s pause, she walked over and climbed up beside him.

  “You like me,” he teased.

  “I do not.”

  “Liar.”

  “You like me,” she said, in the tone of an insult.

  “I do like you, Cora,” he said. “I know I just met you last week but … I like you.”

  “Okay,” she said. “Maybe I like you too. A little bit.”

  “Just a little bit? And the lies go on.”

  She laughed. “Well, I’m still trying to get you figured. You’re different than I thought you’d be.”

  “How’s that?”

  “You’re a lot more … rambunctious.”

  “You have no idea.”

  “Cooler too.”

  “I work hard to create a terrible first impression. That way I can only go up.”

  “You’re funny. Not normal, good-sense-of-humor-for-the-average-person funny. But really funny. Like, to where I’m afraid I might pee my pants just from being around you.”

  “I’ll work hard to make that happen.”

  “You’re witty,” she said, poking him in the forehead. “You think quick.”

  “If you were saving my outrageously irresistible good looks for the last item on the list because it’s the most important to you—”

  “See? Funny.”

  “Ouch.”

  “Oh please,” she said, nudging into him. “You know you’re gorgeous, busboy. I can only imagine all the women who came into your restaurant, whispering about the way you look in a t-shirt.”

  “I don’t know about that.”

  “You’re gorgeous,” she said. “Everyone thinks so.”

  “Everyone?”

  “Panky does. You must be able to tell.”

  “Uh … ”

  “I won you in a coin toss the
night you got here, you know. She swore she’d leave you alone.”

  “You’re winding me up.”

  “Nope. Why, do you think she’s pretty?”

  “ … Is this a test?”

  “No.”

  “She’s pretty, but she smokes too much. She also whines more than you do. And you’re like, ten million, five hundred thousand times prettier.”

  Her eyes brightened. “It was a test. And you passed.”

  “I knew it!”

  She nudged him again, leaning in closer this time. He gazed at her, gently brushing her hair back from her face. This was the moment. What was the big deal? Just kiss her. He had to kiss her. He wanted to kiss her. He needed to kiss her. Kiss her. Kiss her. Kiss her.

  He started to move forward.

  Zrrrp! The back door swung open with a loud squeak, making them both jump. Raven stepped through, compost bucket in hand.

  “Oh!” She spotted them and began backing away slowly. “Carry on. Please, carry on. Don’t worry about privacy—I’ll close the blinds.”

  Devin gave her a goofy wave and slapped himself on the forehead. Cora just laughed, and then they were silent, the delicious tension returning. He looked up at the sky. She played with her hair.

  “Random question time,” he said.

  “Okay.”

  He squeezed her knee. “Does this tickle?”

  She jerked away, laughing and trying to retaliate. He blocked her, catching hold of her wrists.

  “Uh oh,” he said. “Sorry, I should have warned you. I’m a black belt in tickling.”

  “That was less than five minutes.” She giggled, wrestling him. “Somebody’s grandma just died because of you.”

  “Oh my God.” He acted shocked, pushing her away in disgust. “Why would you say something so awful?”

  “I’m going to annihilate you.”

  “Listen lady, don’t try anything stupid. I’m considered a lethal weapon by the government.”

  “What if I am too? What if I’m really some genetically engineered super-soldier in disguise? What are you going to do then?”

  “The same thing I’m doing now,” he said.

  “Which is?”

  “ … Be obsessed with how pretty you are. Play with you. Try to kiss you.”

  She faced him, and her eyes caught the sunlight, glowing green.

  “Try,” she said.

  He did, regretting every wasted second before. Her lips were the softest, warmest place. They kissed until their bodies vibrated like one thing.

  ***

  The system of boundaries pertaining to the acceptable touching of a female had always both fascinated Devin and given him anxiety.

  The early stages of his relationship with Jess was like a series of gates, each with a single lock that only needed to be opened once. After the first time he held her hand, he felt comfortable grabbing it anytime he pleased. Once they kissed, she was always wanting more.

  Cora was more like a top-secret military base. A soldier was allowed inside when it served a purpose, but he couldn’t necessarily return the next day and walk back in—not without clearance.

  For the rest of the day, nothing about Cora’s demeanor suggested clearance was being offered. By late afternoon, the thick, awkward vibe was back. She wasn’t exactly cold, but she wasn’t warm either, and he was as paralyzed and confused as he was at age twelve, when kissing was like sex, and sex was still unheard of. It was as if some sort of intimacy reset button had been pressed, erasing all progress.

  All he wanted was to get inside her base. Instead, he was still arguing with the guards at the gate, inching forward one aching glimpse at a time.

  “She’s just messing with your head,” Lucius explained that night. “Watching you, waiting to see what you’ll do now.”

  “What do I do now?”

  “Just keep your edge, and don’t psych yourself out. Maybe she got her period or something. I’ll ask Panky. It’ll be no big deal I’m sure.”

  “We’re not asking Panky if Cora’s got her period. Just stop it. I can handle this.”

  No, he couldn’t. He really couldn’t.

  He tossed and turned after they shut off the lights, the horniness increasing by the minute. He couldn’t stop thinking about kissing her, or what it would be like to eat her pussy or to fuck her from behind, pulling her back to his chest and letting her tits fill the space within his hands. He didn’t assume she would let him do these things to her, but the imagery was beyond his control. It went on and on, a constant onslaught.

  He arched his back, pressing his heels into the bed. This place was like his summer camp, an equally cool spot in the mountains with cabins, cute girls and the complete lack of a place to masturbate. Back at Camp Oakhurst, it took seven days for the senior girls’ counselor Lindsay Calhoun and her bell-bottom jeans to finally motivate him to wander off by himself and get “lost in the woods.”

  Today, it was going to be a Georgia peach. But screw the woods.

  He got up and went outside. The ground was cool and moist under his feet as he padded across the way to the bathroom. He was pretty sure he would be okay, provided no one needed to piss for the next five minutes.

  Luckily, it only took one minute. He thought of her toned legs, the curves of her hips, and …

  He leaned his head on the stall, breathing hard as the feelings of post-wank shame flooded in. It was all the usual stuff: imagining how mortified he would be if he were unknowingly on a hidden-camera show, or if his mother and other dead relatives were watching, turning away in horror as he spasmodically pulled on himself.

  He flushed and washed up before heading back to wallow under the covers. As he turned the corner, he noticed a light in Cora’s cabin. The blinds were wide open. Curiosity slugged him in the gut like a bag full of doorknobs.

  Guhhp. That was what it sounded like.

  He continued along, eyes locked on the ground in front of him. Only a deranged pervert would look in someone’s window. A case could be made for listening once or twice in a lifetime when the assuredness of not getting caught was absolute. But looking? That was full on creepy.

  Anything could be going on in there. A topless bouncy dance, an unspeakable act of personal hygiene, a ritualistic sacrifice … anything. Whatever he saw, he couldn’t unsee it. And if she caught him, she might be forever repulsed.

  What were they thinking, leaving the blinds up? What if he just accidentally looked as he was walking by like he was doing now? It pissed him off. He didn’t want to be a deranged pervert, but now he had no choice.

  He crept closer, peering in. Panky was in bed, headphones on, facing the wall. Cora’s bed was empty.

  “What are you doing?”

  Oh shit.

  He spun around, feeling the thwack as his elbow slammed into the rough wood of the cabin wall. He took a step toward her, his feet tangling in the bushes. The ground came at him.

  He landed on his side, cursing himself. See? He should have faked narcolepsy on the first day. Now, he had to choose between pretending to be drunk and lost, running away, or coming up with a clever solution.

  Run, he told himself. It was better just to run.

  He opened his eyes to see her staring down at him.

  “Hi.” He hopped to his feet, gripping his arm.

  “What were you doing?”

  “What do you mean?”

  “You were looking in our window.”

  “No,” he said. “No, no—I was looking at your window. I swear, I just saw the biggest, weirdest bug I’ve ever seen in my life.”

  “Really?” She walked over. “I know a lot about the local bugs. What’d he look like?”

  “Big,” he said, widening his eyes and spreading his arms. “Huge. Like, the size of a rat. With a body like a wasp and wings like a dragonfly, purple-spotted eyes and these really cool blue antennae that—”

  “Why didn’t I see this ‘big, weird bug’ when I walked up?”

  “He flew awa
y before you walked up. And I was just standing here stunned, thinking holy shit, I just saw a big, weird bug. Which direction should I run first? Who can I wake up and tell?”

  “You’re lying.”

  “You don’t believe me? I must say, I’m quite disappointed in your closed mind.”

  “You’re not lying because there couldn’t be a big, weird bug. You’re lying because you’re lying.”

  “How do you mean?”

  “I saw you just now, spying. First I saw you standing there, and then I saw you go up to the window to try and spy harder.”

  “You saw me,” he repeated slowly. “Meaning that you were hidden nearby, watching me without my knowing?”

  She smirked and said firmly, “Yes.”

  He made a tsk tsk sound with his teeth. “What a shame. Perhaps we should look up the definition of spying—”

  “I’m going to kick you.”

  “Big, weird bug.” He giggled, darting away. “That’s my story and I’m sticking to it.”

  “Hey,” she said. “Come here.”

  He did as told. She took his hands.

  “Random question time,” she said. “When are you leaving for India?”

  “I have no idea. Maybe sometime in August. Why?”

  “Just wondering what you want. I’m not some sort of commune whore, you know. If we’re going to do something, it’s a big deal for me … And you should know in advance, I’m not a very good girlfriend.”

  “Good. I want a bad girlfriend.”

  “Devin.”

  “I’m joking,” he said. “Hey … I like you in a way I didn’t even know the human mind was capable of. And I already told you I was staying the whole summer.”

  Her eyes drifted downward. “Yeah, well … People don’t always do what they say they will.”

  “I will,” he said.

  “Why would you want someone like me when you could have Panky? She would have gotten with you on the first night.”

  “I’d wait a thousand years for you before I’d go for any other girl.”

  “Well, you were looking at her in the window …”

  “What?” He blinked, bewildered. “Are you kidding me? I was looking for you.”

 

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