CARTER
Four months later...
Josh hasn’t let up since we left the house. He keeps giving me crap, telling me how bad I’ve got it for Holly and how whipped I am. I keep my mouth shut because, in all honesty, it’s the truth and I actually don’t mind him giving me crap. I don’t mind that he’s telling me that I’ve got it bad for a girl that I’m absolutely crazy about, for a girl that brought me back to life.
When it came time to cross that line, to end our friendship and start something more, we made the decision together and haven’t looked back since. There hasn’t been one second that I’ve regretted, and I’m glad I got the chance to tell my mom how right she was... how starting out as friends has given us so much more than I could’ve asked for. I’ll always be thankful that my mom got to meet Holly; that she got to meet the girl that has her son’s heart.
Holly was there for me when my mom passed away and I’m not sure what I would’ve done without her. It wasn’t like it was with my dad and my brother; I didn’t have enough strength to be the strong one—the rock for my sister to lean on. I was a complete mess, but I had Holly there and she was my rock. The two of us have been through so much over the last few months and she single-handedly brought me back from the depths of darkness. She showed me forgiveness, which I’m still not sure why, but I still needed it from her.
We pull up to her apartment and I’m excited as hell to see her, but I’m also nervous for her. What she’s planning to do tonight is something she has been struggling with for months, and I just want it to be everything she hopes it will be.
When we turn the corner and head into her apartment building, I stop abruptly when I see Travis jogging down the stairs in front of us. The last thing I want right now is to get into anything with him. I’m past fighting and arguing; I don’t want anything to spoil Holly’s night. He stops abruptly when he sees me, too.
“Hey, man,” I say. Josh is standing beside me and I can feel the tension build in the small space we’re standing in as Travis eyes us both.
“Gotta minute?” Travis asks, looking directly at me.
“Sure.” Josh still doesn’t move from my side. “I’ll see you up there, man,” I say, slapping Josh on the back, letting him know that I’ve got this. From the look on Travis’s face, it doesn’t look like there’s any need to worry.
Josh doesn’t say a word as he moves around Travis and jogs up the stairs.
“Guess I deserve that,” Travis says, clearing his throat. “I just came by to see Holly before I left town, I couldn’t find her at the graduation ceremony earlier.” He looks down at his feet and then says, “I’m actually glad I ran into you. I owe you an apology for being such a jerk. The last year has been tough and I was still dealing with stuff, but I went about it the wrong way. I had no right to say some of the things I said to you. I know what happened that night wasn’t your fault. I know you did everything you could and it was just an accident.”
As I look at him, even though a part of me wants to hate him for all the shit he did and how he treated Holly that one afternoon, I can’t. The guy lost his best friend and he dealt with it the only way he knew how.
“Hey, man, don’t worry about it,” I tell him.
He swallows hard and nods. “Holly seems to be doing well. I’m happy for her, she’s a great girl.”
“Yeah, she is,” I say, knowing how lucky I am to have her.
HOLLY
The four of us are on our way to Sterling’s. Carter is driving and I’m sitting in the passenger seat, scared out of my freaking mind. In between shifting the gears, Carter’s hand finds mine and strokes it slowly, trying to reassure me, reminding me that he is here for me.
Tonight I am going to keep my end of the deal that I made with Jenna many months ago. Not only is a bet, a bet, but this is something that I have to do for myself.
“Holly, we’re here,” Carter’s voice pulls me from my thoughts.
Carter meets me in front of the car and grabs my hand. It’s weird, but I swear he looks even more nervous than I do right now. We walk in, hand in hand, and I’m repeating lyrics over in my head, hoping my mind doesn’t go blank when I get up on stage.
“You ready for this?” Jenna asks me.
“As ready as I’ll ever be.” I give her a smile. I’m trying not to let my nerves get to me, or hide them so no one else can see them.
“You’re gonna be great. Just relax and enjoy the moment,” Carter whispers in my ear as Joe hops up on stage to introduce me. Taking a deep breath in, I try to push away all my fears.
“It’s been a while, but let’s welcome back one of our favorite singers… Holly Treadwell, everyone.” Joe turns to me and claps, welcoming me onstage. I walk up the few steps and hug him tight, thanking him for continuing to believe in me.
“Hi, everyone. Thanks so much for coming out tonight. It’s been a while since I’ve been on stage, but I’ve gotta say that it feels amazing to be back. This is something I’ve been working on for a while now. It’s a song about my past, my present, and my future.” I lean back away from the microphone and lock eyes with Carter’s. I lick my lips before leaning forward again. “It’s called Fall from Love; hope you like it.”
Memories of you haunt me wherever I go
I lay here and feel the weight I’m holding
Most days, it feels like I’m drowning
But I’m not sure how to be strong, how to carry on
Trying to let go of the only thing I know
Time passes slow, so slow I can barely keep up
Wind blows soft, so soft I can barely stand up
My heart beats light, so light I can barely sit up
It took time, but I finally see
I know who I am, and who I wanna be
I’ll be strong and I’ll find the strength to carry on
After all this time, my hearts finally been set free
You’ve healed me with your love
And I’ll never be able to look at anyone else
The way I look at you
I have no doubt that what we have is meant to be
I’ve given you my heart
Now you own every part of me
Time passes so fast, so fast I can barely keep up
Wind blows so strong, so strong I can barely stand up
My heart beats so hard, so hard I can barely sit up
I’m right here and I’m not going anywhere
I’m holding on to you, you’re holding onto me
When things get tough, we’ll take a deep breath
Because as long as we have each other
This world is ours, it’s ours to share
Smiling wide, I pull back from the microphone as cheers, screams, and whistles erupt all over the club. I absorb the energy and it makes me feel warm inside—a unique feeling you can only get from being on stage—a feeling I haven’t felt in a long time and one that I wasn’t sure I’d ever feel again.
After taking a quick bow, I eagerly exit the stage, wanting to get back to my friends. I’m only a few steps off the stage when I see Jenna, Carter and Josh standing a few feet away, applauding.
“You were amazing!” Jenna screams with tears in her eyes. She wraps her arms around me. “I’m so proud of you.”
“Thanks.” I beam, pulling back from her embrace. Next to her stands the inspiration for parts of the song and the guy responsible for bringing me back to life.
Carter smiles, shaking his head. “Wow, I’ve never seen anything like what you just did. It was… beautiful.”
“Dude, that’s all you can say to her? It was fucking awesome!” Josh says, pulling me in for a hug.
“Thank you,” I say to everyone, not able to wash the smile off my face.
When Josh releases me, Carter pulls me into his chest and I close my eyes, feeling safe and totally at peace. “How was it?” he asks, kissing the top of my head.
“It was more incredible than I ever thought it could be.” I pull back and lo
ok up at him. “I didn’t realize how much I missed being up on stage.”
“And that the stage missed you!” Jenna adds. “Did you hear those screams? Holy shit, I’ve never heard this place get that loud.”
I laugh and Carter grabs my hand in his, causing any anxiety or nerves I have left inside me to melt away.
“I love you.” I smile and reach up to give him a kiss, feeling him smile against me.
“Okay, seriously, the two of you are adorable, but come on. You have all night to kiss and tell each other how in love you are. Right now, we need to celebrate,” Jenna says.
❧
The four of us are sitting in a booth, listening to the rest of the singers on stage. It’s been a couple hours since I finished, but I still feel the buzz of energy inside me and still can’t wash the smile off my face.
“You know, we should totally do something crazy and stupid,” Jenna says out of the blue when there’s a break in between songs.
“I can think of a few crazy and stupid things we could do.” Josh raises his eyebrow and gives her a sexy smile.
I’m shocked, but the guy can still make her blush. She elbows him playfully in the ribs and continues to try to make her point. “I’m serious. We’ve just graduated from college, we’re about to have to face the real world—which I’ve heard totally sucks—so I think we should do one last stupid thing. What do you say?” She glances around the table at each of us.
“What did you have in mind?” I ask her.
“Nothing too crazy. Something spontaneous, though. Something we can do together, like a vacation or something.” She pauses for a moment and then her eyes light up. “I’ve got it. A road trip. Let’s all pile in the car and drive somewhere far away and crazy. We can leave tonight, right now.”
“Babe, we’ve all been drinking,” Josh says, immediately taking the light from Jenna’s eyes.
“I haven’t had a drink,” Carter says and everyone’s eyes fall on him.
It’s crazy, but I actually like her harebrained idea. She’s right, after tonight we’re considered educated adults and, according to society, we’re groomed enough to enter the real world. My life feels so good right now that I don’t want the feeling to end. I want to prolong this feeling for as long as possible.
“I’m in,” I say, smiling.
“She’s right, man. I say let’s do it,” Carter says looking at me. “Doing something stupid and spontaneous sounds perfect right now.”
The adrenaline begins to build in my chest and a large smile stretches across my lips.
“Screw it, I’m in!” Josh yells slamming his hand down on the table.
“Really?” Jenna jumps up and down in her seat. “Are we really going to do it? Oh, my God, where should we go? I’ve always wanted to go to Vegas… or maybe the Grand Canyon. Oh, my God, this is going to be so epic!”
We all begin to scoot out of the booth as Jenna and Josh are talking about where we should go and what each of them wants to do when we get there.
Carter shakes his head and laughs. “You know what we just agreed to, right? We just agreed to spend a week or more with these two... in a small, confined space.”
I laugh and take his hand in mine. “Yeah, I know.”
Deep down, it doesn’t matter where we go, what we do, when we get there, or how long we stay because, as long as I have these three amazing people with me, I’ll be happy.
I learned a lot in my four years of college, but it was more about life, love, loss and finding out who I really am and who I want to be, more than anything else. I learned that having good friends is one of the most important things in life and that, without them, your life will be empty. I learned that you have to face your fears, no matter how big or small, and challenge yourself even when you’re scared out of your freaking mind. I learned that when you’re faced with a leap of faith and you’re debating on whether or not to take it—take it and don’t look back. I learned that it’s okay to make mistakes and it’s okay to have the wrong answer, as long as you keep searching for the right one. I learned that you’ve got to grab hold of the people you love and love them every second that you can because you never know when it will be their last, or yours. I learned that you can go on after losing someone you love, even when the dark days come and it seems like they will stay forever. I learned that, with time, your heart does heal. You may never forget and your heart may always ache for them, but the days do become brighter and the pain does fade. I learned that being happy takes work and you’ve got to learn what makes your heart smile and go after it, and don’t stop until you have it just the way you want it because life’s too short to live any other way.
The End
Acknowledgements
I would like to thank the readers who purchased this book. Without you guys, writing would not be as rewarding or near as much fun. I love reading your messages and hearing the love you have for my stories. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.
To my family and friends who have encouraged me, listened to my complaints, my fears, and my crazy story ideas. I don’t know what I would do without you guys! Thank you.
Thank you Kristin and Alizon at C&D Editing who take such great care of my story and make it shine with such professionalism and dedication.
Most of all, a huge thank you to my husband, Ryan, who is always supportive and patient when listening to my endless worries and fears about my story and my characters. Even though deep down he probably thinks I’m strange, he never shows it. Love you, babe
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