He dissolved, weeping into her tunic.
He must have realized it was her shortly after, for he wrapped both arms around her back and held her tight. She was not sure what to do, to offer comforting words or stroke his hair, so she knelt there and held him tightly. It did not take long for tears to roll down her own cheeks.
He collected himself, but she did not rush, happy to hold and be held once again. For him to dissolve like that, he must have finally been able to handle no more. He loosened his grip on her, but she still did not free him until she felt his breathing steady.
She released her hold and held his face up in both hands. “I’m sorry, Gabriel,” she whispered, new tears springing from her eyes. “I’m so sorry. I was so brash, and I didn’t stop to think about your feelings. This is all my fault.”
His eyes were startlingly blue surrounded by red rims. He cracked his lips to speak but sealed it, screwing his lips to fight the new tears glossing his eyes. “It is not all your fault,” he whispered.
“What happened?” She kept her voice low to match his, running a thumb over his wet cheek. “What brought you to this?”
He closed his eyes and shook his head. “I rationalized too much. I pushed myself too hard to learn Void, and I’ve compromised the Head Mage Seat.”
Her heart clenched. “That is not the only thing that brought you to this. You couldn’t take any more, could you?”
He opened his eyes. “I could not.”
She released his face and sat back in his lap, putting a finger near the wound on his chest. “Tell me. Tell me everything.”
He ran a hand through his hair and let out a long exhale. “You don’t want to hear it all.”
“I do.”
“If I can hardly bear it, you cannot.”
“You would be surprised how strong I can be.”
He reached for his shirt and dried his cheeks on it. She was interested to know why half his clothes were strewn throughout the room. “No, no I cannot.”
She put her hands on his shoulders, the shoulders that bore her countless times. It was time for her to bear him. “Tell me what happened in the dungeons. Tell me what happened with the Arconians. Tell me what happened when you broke, when you faced death, when you were first captured. Tell me.”
He gave her a long look in which she could see him deciding. “Where do you want me to start?” he finally asked.
“With the worst.”
He pinched the bridge of his nose and clenched his eyes. “Axa, the first Arconian.” His eyes flitted to hers to see if she would react, but he shook his head. “No, I can’t.”
“If you came this close to ending your life again, you need to share this pain. Tell me.”
“Oh, stars,” he muttered and leaned his head on the bed taking a long while to speak. “She came to me two nights before I broke. She latched a bubble-pattern around my neck—it’s a pattern that prevents anything getting in or out—and she suffocated me.” He pinched his lips into a thin line and stared into the fire. “When I came to, she had gotten me on the bed…stripped me and tied me down. Then she took me.”
“Oh, stars,” Robyn whispered, one hand over her mouth, her other clutching his.
He met her eyes. “And she had me all night.”
“Oh, Gabriel,” she breathed.
“I fought her, Robyn, I fought her with all I had. I resisted and thought of dead puppies and frozen landscapes. I rubbed my wrists and ankles raw and even tried to lay a pattern to daze her. Of course it backfired and only left me dazed.”
She put a hand over his lips. “You don’t have to justify it for me.”
He smiled faintly though it did not reach his eyes. “I do it for me.”
“What of the others?”
He shrugged a shoulder. “By then I was already broken and didn’t care. You were dead, I was dying, I had nothing left to fight for, so I didn’t.”
“What of Lace?”
“That…is a story for another day.” He sighed.
“What is the next worst thing?”
“You glossed over the Arconians rather quickly.”
“Something I should have done a month ago. I should not have let it bother me as it did. I see now you had no choice, and I should have believed you.”
“Will you forgive me?”
“For what?” she breathed.
“Lying, not fighting hard enough.”
She stroked his cheek. “Only if you forgive yourself first.”
He thinned his lips. “Oh, I’m bleeding on you. Let me clean up.”
She slid off his lap, and he walked to the washroom. She saw fresh scratches across his shoulders. ‘Was that why his clothes are strewn about?’
He walked back in a moment later with a towel held to his chest. He looked leaner than she remembered, though he was always lanky and trim. With a pattern he drew the water from the blood on her clothes and another to flake the minerals off. “I know you’re used to dropping your clothes wherever you take them off, but this is a bit excessive.” She gestured to the room as he sat down again.
“Yeah…that.” He twirled a black ring on the tip of one of his fingers. One just like it matched his other hand. “I might have sided with an Arch Mage in exchange for her knowledge on Void.”
“That is…daring.”
“I may lose the Seat. She had a way into Jaden I couldn’t work out, and I couldn’t have the Arch Mages shifting in whenever they pleased, so I agreed to meet with her every night to learn Void.”
“And…other things,” she gestured to his clothes and submerged her heartbrokenness.
“No, not that. Very nearly, but no.” Gabriel scratched the back of his head.
“That explains why Mikelle looked so glum.”
“Was she talking to Lael?” His eyes lit up.
“No, walking the courtyard.”
He looked surprised. “She walked in on me.”
“Half naked.”
“Details.” He waved a hand.
“How did she know?”
He thumbed a ring on his finger. “She has wards set on the doors to feel how many people come and go from my rooms. I was alone when Maxine passed through my bedchamber. She must have thought I was in danger.”
“You forgot about them?”
“I was a little preoccupied.”
“So the Arch Mages have no way in now?”
“As far as I know,” he nodded and removed the towel. The bleeding had stopped. “How did you get here?”
“I rode.”
“With who?”
“Just me. Your bridge is out.”
His eyes widened. “You did what? Does Aisling know?”
“No.”
“Isn’t your kingdom at war?” he gathered his shirt. “You can’t up and leave them like that.”
“And had I been a minute slower, you would have left yours.”
He paused while pulling his shirt on. “Fair enough. I will be back shortly.” His eyes and hair suddenly became frighteningly white, and he vanished. A large golden-eyed cat wandered in a few minutes later. It regarded her with moderate disdain and plopped itself before the fire.
Gabriel suddenly reappeared. His wound began to seep again.
“She is relieved.” He said.
“Was she infuriated?”
“Not when I explained why you came. But, you should know…” he took a seat before her. “Ryker Slade came looking for you, and since you were not there, he took Prince Virgil.”
“What?” she breathed. “When?”
“Yesterday.”
“Oh stars, will he kill him?”
Gabriel grimaced. “I do not know.”
“Can you do anything?”
He shook his head.
She put her forehead in a hand. “His father will think I had something to do with this.”
“His father sent him to be murdered if necessary.”
She looked up. “He may think you had something to do with this.”
“King Victor would not be so foolish. Now, we’ve both had a long day. Shall I walk you to your rooms?”
“Do not be silly. I am staying here tonight.”
“I’m silly? I would not have you disgraced so.”
“I’m not leaving you tonight,” she stated with a terse tone she used when commanding subjects.
He knew he would get nowhere. “Fine, take the right side. I’ll find you some clothes.”
“I’ll have a bath first.” She stood and undid her hair.
“As my Queen commands,” he said quietly and pulled out fresh towels.
She washed quickly and dressed in a pair of his sleeping garments. The trousers pooled around her ankles and the shirt reached her knees, but she could not complain. They smelled like him. He was already in bed when she joined him. The big black cat curled up on his thighs.
“Coal protects my dignity, so don’t get any creative ideas,” he said as she climbed in.
“After the story you just told me, you cannot possibly think I would try anything licentious with you.”
He gave her a sad smile and touched her face. “Thank you for listening.” With a wave of his hand the fire died, casting them in darkness and silence. “Wait. How did you get over the bridge if it was out?”
Maxine hovered outside the walls of Castle Jaden, standing on a plinth of air. In the shroud of evening no one could see her, and what guards passed along the walls looked to the landscape, not the skies. She stood with her arms folded and a scowl on her pretty face as she watched the Head Mage’s windows.
Gabriel passed them briefly and she smirked. It was a rare occasion that anyone bested her. It was rarer still for her not to see it coming. ‘What a treasure you are,’ she mused. ‘I will have you in the end, my beauty, but it will be you who begs for me.’
Gabriel stepped before a window and her heart gave a surprising leap. The smile on her lips slid away. In the end, one of them would die. If she allied with him, the Arch Mages would kill her. She had a much better advantage fighting against him.
‘I’m sorry, Gabriel, for the things I have yet to do.’
-End
Continue the story here with book four:
Chasing Bloodlines
Other Books by Jenna Van Vleet
The Father of the Fifth Age series
The Castrofax
Breaking Stars
Unlocking Void
Chasing Bloodlines
Felling Kingdoms
About The Author
Reality is boring, and Jenna realized that very early on. If she was not reading fantasy, she was writing it. As an artist she dabbles in everything from costuming, portrait art, and leather crafting. She currently resides in Utah with her husband, and is 15 cats away from being crazy.
Unlocking Void (Book 3) Page 21
